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luolasto virgin chad virgin vs chad neckbeard normie

Origin Entry: Virgin vs. Chad

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Virgin Mars Colonisation -Thinks mars will someday turn out as friendly as Earth from future """terraforming projects"""""" Lives for like 1 year on mars before dying of bone cancer Thin, weak atmosphere -Temperature comparable to a cold day in wisconsin -Will literally never happen. -Elon Musk prob fooled you into thinking this is possible for attention -Barely restraining himself from depression caused suicide Chad Venus suicide mission -Accepts venus' eternal literal manifastation of hell. Can literally swim in the 90 bar air, how cool is that -Survives for like 9 minutes max before his space suit melts and space helmet cracks opencracks -Temperature comparable to sticking your head in a pizza oven. Huge rush of adrelinine and testosterone Can easily be done, only ethics are stopping NASA

Is literally a giant baby Reads books and uses big words like a true virgin The virgin Judge Holden Small size just makes his penis look bigger The Chad Glanton Is the leader, even the Judge must answer to him Hairless? That's kinda feminine bro Has sex with a retard and 12 year old girls Claims to be a judge, but never reveals what he's a judge of. Seriously what the hell is going on with that imbecile? Literally told the Judge to stop being a bitch and to get a new horse Last words are unfathomably based Can never go out in a blaze of glory because he can never die Probably isn't even real, just some kinda metaphor. What a cop out. Banned from returning to Texas probably because he had premarital sex with every woman in the state Keen strategist Zero redeeming qualities yet still loved by all

Self The virgin Zeus Centered f-- demons The one true god, Arceus Secretly allied to Cares for all living things ด Does not tolerate malice Mistreats his own family Allowed humans to be mean Finds excuses to do as he pleases Racist to those he call freaks A family man Encourages being nice and kind 100% pure, humble and truthful Friends to other races, even heroic digimon

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the virgin ogre vs the chad manlet by [deleted]

he virgin s< All blood from brain flows into leqs, is menfolly retarded Dies of heoft 'se as« af 52 The Chad s7 Arched back because he vil hit hir head on e ih the thous ands only person to oici deotuajs ofherwise cehluh Leg pain besause oUcH Basicall invisible o0 year lifespan Fils Hhrovgh keyholes

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The Chad Guys and the Virgin Britbong by TheCuckTendies

The Chad Guys The Virgin Britbong Banned from twitter for making fun of midgets "Looks like Autism runs in the family." Calls everyone a n-----, doesnt even give a f--- yo 5'4" manlet No friends Patchy beard cant grow facial hair - fuuck Autistic C--- on his tummy Eats meatball subs "Can i fap to them?" baby joint (as confirmed by ex)

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The virgin bike vs the chad unicycle by BasileusJustinian

The Virgin Bike THE CHAD UNICYCLE Knows he won't crash helmet is unnesecarv Has never seen a brake in his life "I'm doing my part to stay green" >can't afford a car Scared of crashing: wears a helmet and leggings Can't balance - slouches over to grab handlebar Upright posture from perfect balance Cars hate him as much as he hates cars Admired by onlookers Has to yield to both pedestrians and motorists Pedestrians glady give way to him, understanding he won't stop BIKES Aesthetic and simple Bike weighs more than he does esign On his way to play basketball with his bros Bom BS Biking was the only sport he was athletic enough for

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Virgin Yoshi vs Chad Lucas

Ragequits when taunted against Ugly and bald "The Virgin Yoshi" "The Chad Lucas" Regularily uses unfamiliar characters to challenge himself and to keep the game fun Uses only the same old character because he doesn't have the skill to get good with more than one Uses the moves that he's not good with to learn how to use that particular character better Only plays with the best internet connection. But will still beat any player on any laggy connection to teach them a lesson Constantly gets into an egg because he's a p---- and avoids all conflict If the match is going badly he'll try as hard as he can to land neutral b and get his opponent off the edge Grinds new players into the dust with no hint of remorse Never ventures off the stage, instead only uses up special for edge guarding Enjoys the challenge of encountering arn opponent more experienced than himself and will stay until the other player leaves to better himself and his skills Slender body "It builds character" Doesn't upgrade his horrible internet plan so that when he loses he can blame on the lag "PK Gunshow Has never even heard of using a shield Taunts when winning after 16 straight matches of losing the nair is his most feared move The most perfect hair you have ever seen 160 FPS of glorious perfection Constantly uses flutter kick to build up damage easily Leaves immediately after to avoid inevitably losing Taunts after every move Edge guards using only the snake whilest in the air Covers groinal cavity 3 FPS of animation Extremely tight shorts to show off bulge

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The Virgin Family Guy vs The Chad South Park by Biggie_cheese217

The Chad South Park The Virgin Family Guy Relies on cut-aways for any comedy Bashes several modern situations and gets away with it Makes fun of Family Guy for using cut-aways Tries to cache in on modern situations but fails Has always been cared for by team Creator is begging for the show to end Creators want to keep the show going until CC cancels it Has been milked for 8 years Only good for background noise Good in literally any situation Follows typical miserable family and can't make it work Follows a bunch of f------ middle schoolers and makes it work Limited by Fox and Disney standards Not limited by Fox and Disney in any way Deemed a dead show Still going strong Not a single character is likeable Way too many likeable Cancelled twice Never cancelled Most people who prefer it are miserable Ridiculed by internet for how bad it has gotten People who prefer it are men of culture Praised by the internet for good quality Untalented and bland voice acting Voice acting never fails to amuse

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Wil Wheaton vs. Wil Willis

can't pick a hair color The virgin wil wheaton the chad wil willis was an army ranger was so annoying as a character even saving the ship multiple times couldn't save his role continually complains about not being the lead on an ensemble tv show fantastic hair host of two television shows doesn't realize his beard - fulfills the kids in the hall sketch reference of puffy, compromising face was an air force OUCH pararescueman generally has wrong opinions yells at people and they make knives for him says he'll help you move but doesn't show up probably saved the world a bunch of times but can't talk about it had a usenet group dedicated to people who hated his character doesn't play tabletop games would probably help you move

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Virgin Apple Juice vs. Chad Orange Juice

dehydrated because water excess water keeps chad hydrateed is removed muscles toned from squeezing too sweet, probably contains sweetners oranges to make juice TESCO ORANGE JUICE requires more apples to make Iceland muscles weak because apples are processsed OucH PURE JUICE FROM CONCENTRATE citrus from orange is rich in vitamin C thus inherently better constipated from lack of fibre content 5 e1 litre electrolytes raise chads masculine energy

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The Virgin Moctezuma vs Chad Hernan Cortes

VIRGIN MOCTEZUMA CHAD HERNAN CORTES Great military leader Unpopular with his people, he was killed by them in Tenochtitlan Liberated many indigenous peoples who were oppressed by Aztec rule Superior steel armor Big heavy shield that breaks obsidian weapons Crappy shield, useless against spanish steel weapons Though Cortes was a god /小 With few soldiers he defeated a large Aztec army in Otumba Heathen- Weak obsidian javelin Devoted Christian

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Saw

the virgin jigsaw THE CHAD HOFFMAN Goes on spergy nihilistic rants to people who don't care Views killing as "distasteful" but is fine with maiming people psychologically and physically No qualms with killing people, games are purposely unwinnable, not a hypocrite like John Carried out an elaborate cat and mouse game with Strahm, winning it in the end Moralfag Stabbed a bunch of cops to death in seconds Ass cancer spread to his brain Stabs detective with faggy Assassin's Creed blade and runs away Roastie destroyer Jigsaw's best apprentice Avenges his sister after she was Enacts revenge after a accident that made him lose his child, yet scrutinizes one of his subjects for doing the same Married to a roastie murdered

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Virgin Shota vs. Chad Fat old Man

NSFW

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Virgin PS4 vs Chad PS1 by Momentanius

BAD VOICEACTING, STILL MEMORABLE AS F--- HAS SOME OF THE GREATEST CLASSICS IN VIDEO-GAME HISTORY 300000 GB OF UPDATES EVERYTIME YOU START THE DAMN THING MOST TRIPLE-A GAMES ARE CORRIDOR SHOOTERS OR BRAWLERS DIE MONSTER BEAUTIFUL COLOR, AND MEMORABLE DESIGN GAMES FULL OF MICROTRANSACTIONS SAYS PS4 EXCLUSIVES ARE THE BEST, BUT SECRETLY WANTS TO PLAY LEGEND OF ZELDA AND HALO 5 1S SLOWLY ABANDONING PHYSICAL COPIES, INDIE GAMES DON'T EVEN GET A PHYSICAL COPY NOONLINE CONNECTION GET YOUR CHAD FRIENDS TO İCEREN 3 BADASS STARTUP SOUND PLAY! NO MICROTRANSACTIONS, HAD TO PLAY TO UNLOCK EVEN YOUR MOM KNOWS THE OLD PLAYSTA TION UGLY SHADES OF COLOR STAYS ON YOUR SHELF WHILE YOU PLAY OTHER GAMES ON YOUR PC STUFF PRO VERSION IS FIGHTING AGAINST THE VIRGIN SWITCH AND X-BONES DOESN'T HAVE FINAL FANTASY TACTICS FOUGHT AGAINST THE CHAD N64 AS FINAL FANTASY TACTICS

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Virgin Pro Controller VS Chad Joycons

Plays like any other generic console gamer. Pretends to care about gyro Can tilt, mash, shake, crank, use as a remote, and all kinds of other s---. An adaptive monster Immersed from outside movement and The Virgin Pro Controller / "THE CHAD JOYCONS" Head craned forward at the TV as it's the only way to be immersed actions he makes Billions of friends/co- workers to hang out with Makes more people interested in gamingn Looks below parallel Local play for days Throws the controller at the TV in rage Only plays online multiplayer God wriststraps prevent any accidents Has no friends for any reason to get more controllers from happening Billions of First-Party colours and combinations Considers people he met online has "friends" Back slouched from mostly playing docked Spent $280 just to get four controllers that he can use Arms constantly waggling in confident, unpredictable ways for other virgin Pro Controllers Stiff, straight arms Intentionally slaps and batters everyone with OUCH Will play the s--- out of Smash with the bad boys Little arm movement Struggles to find comfortable hand Joycons Quickly snaps in two when making large quick movements form Hands always prepared to slide the Joycons off the switch and give it to a friend Immediately cramps upon holding small Back is so straight from playing outside of his house all the time in Handheld and Tabletop objects Will abandon for a Gamecube controller Zero good First-Party colours $70 to get all he needs Carries the f--- out of the Joycons in his pockets when Smash arrives Has to carry a bag just to take the f------ with him Hogs the good controller to himself, and make his non-existent friends use the crappy Joycons Makes everyone use single Joycon to be a true bro and equal Excited to have another game to play locally, dedicated to Chads like him Pro 1 Will never have a Switch commericial experience Switch commericials are based on HIS experiences Seethes at Super Mario Party Infinite Joy-

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Virgin vs. Chad - Virgin Normie vs Chad neckbeard by Spikanor

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Uploaded Sep 07, 2018 at 11:47PM EDT

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Virgin vs. Chad

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