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How the TSA agent looks at me after I tell him "You forget 1000 things a day, let this be one of them."

OkBuddyRetard
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Realizing ©2024 Gee-Oh that it will be many years before you have access to boobies again. Mommy's cut you off. 24 Gee-ph

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The most racist Conquistador to ever live His Wife xxx

History Memes
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do you have any ibuprofen? i got a headache

Dungeons and Dragons
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max @maxpalumbo5 When my youngest brother was little he was being bullied and went to my parents for help. They told him "Sticks and stones may break my bones" they then asked him to finish the phrase and he said "but chains and whips excite me" he seriously thought that was he second part.

Mad Lad / Madlad
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When you're wearing wet/dirty gloves and your nose starts itching

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F--- ZODIAC SIGNS. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE BURGER WRAPPER/CONTAINER? VE GUY BURGERS and fing BIG MAC FLAME GRILLED WHOPPER America's Favorite Burger 00000000 HAMBURGER DO NOT HICROWAVE alaji ala

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Furries / Furry
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Bidor TW

Hololive
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QM, Plagu3

Bunny Suit
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casters running out of resources guess i'll have to stick to cantrips now. martials running out of resources O

Dungeons and Dragons
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O OKALIZ *She wears boots because her feet are delicate*

Furries / Furry
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SEE ANYTHING you LIKE? U ANYTHING THAT INTERESTS YOU?

Atlyss
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イラ Ο アンチ?とレスバする初音ミクさん♪ イライラにえれくとりっくんじゃ 01 XX

Hatsune Miku / Vocaloid
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RUB prrr... RUB Pr.. Prr... what the hell am I doing?! he put Super Happy Catnip on his fur pff you're weird Prr.. Qrrr. @quaverdraws

Sonic the Hedgehog
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What is it, Oltyx? An age-old accord between the royal house and the cryptek conclaves, which gave the sorcerers their exalted status - in exchange for relinquishing all control over canopteks to the crown. Our crypteks are forbidden from interacting with them, via an unbreakable seal on their executive buffers.' 'Why?' 'Paranoia on the part of my esteemed phaeron and matriarch, Anathrosis of the Black Star. A paranoia which has paid off, in fairness." 'I thought Anathrosis was your patriarch?" asked Oltyx, briefly distracted by won- dering if he had misremembered this detail of the seccession war. "That changed.' 'I see. But Zultanekh... if you are of the royal line, can you not see to the trebuchet yourself?' 'Would I? Gladly. Do I know how canopteks work? No. None of us do.' THE TWICE-DEAD KING REIGN NATE CROWLEY

Warhammer 40,000
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KING LOUIS WHEN NAPOLEON RETURNED FROM HIS VACATION ON ELBA 8 IGHT IMMA HEAD OUT

History Memes
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BR 093743 326604 0 0.46554 1 DR CO 236 EDGERUNNER SKELETON The Edgerunner perk in the Technical Ability perk tree allows you to exceed your Cyberware Capacity. EDGERUNNER Cyberware Capacity exceeded by: 50 Max health reduced by: -68 Fury chance: 5% F VIEW IN PERK TREE ER ENT

Greentext Stories
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Anonymous 54 KB JPG >be me 12/01/24(Sun)09:55:21 No.79625593 >5 hours ago >start taking a s--- >business as usual >long pendulous s--- >good amount of girth too >all of a sudden the turd stops coming out >keep pushing but it doesnt go any further >dont know what to do >stand up >s--- still in ass >slam the turd against the counter to maybe knock it out >it just rapidly wobbles back and forth like i just flicked a door stopper >end up just grabbing the f------ thing with my bare hand >try pulling it out manually >wont come out >decide to think smarter not harder >grab gfs hair dryer >prop leg up on the counter >blast the s--- with the heat to soften it up >it just f------ flails around like a raw bacon strip in a wind tunnel >use other hand to hold it steady while i heat it up >at some point my gf gets home from work >didnt hear the front door open due to the sound of the hair dryer >she sees me in the bathroom (i s--- with the door wide open) half naked with a leg up on the counter, one hand holding an ass turd thats still partially in my ass and the other blasting it with her hair dryer >see her behind me and make eye contact with her through the mirror >turn off the hair dryer >she doesnt say anything >i dont say anything >we just stare at each other through the mirror for like 9 seconds, but it felt like 10 seconds >for some inexplicable reason the turd starts slowly reentering my anus >absolute silence fills the room, with the exception of the slime sounds from the s--- log making its way back home >realize i have to break this painfully awkward silence >try to lighten up the mood with a joke >rack my autistic brain to come up with something good to say >"they call me the plunger" >she slams the door in my face before i can say the punchline >quickly follow her out the bathroom >tell her "wait i can explain" >the s--- suddenly slips out of my ass like butter and plops directly on the living room carpet >suddenly dont know how to explain >she just walks out the front door and drives away >havent heard from her since

Greentext Stories
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to my son: your black is so beautiful 0:07/0:15 Anonymous (ID: WMUJKBMC) 02/09/21(Tue)16:47:49 No.307348652 >>307348028 (You) This picture is like a Renaissance painting in its poignancy: the desperately self-deluded White mother with her expression of soul-crushing grief, her impotent affirmations of her son's "beauty", the n-----'s violent, feral expression betraying a low intelligence and ape-like, violent nature at even such a young age. A Rembrandt is not art such as this.

Greentext Stories
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