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You know, when I left the house today I was thinking "Damn, I really hope some hot chick paints my brains all over some f------ hallway." And here we are. I mean really, just absolutely destroy me. I'm talkin' full on, watermelon-in-the-thighs level carnage. And I want it. to scare the s--- outta me. I mean I hope I piss myself. I hope I piss myself and you call me your little "peepee pisspiss boy." I want you to f--- me up. I mean I want you to make me your bitch. Your little peepee-piss- myself-bitch. I want it to get embarressing. I mean like... weirdly embarressing. Unsanitary, too. We should be entirely different people, by the end of the first eight hours. Do you understand what I'm trying to say here? I mean, I'm a real freak. I'm not normal. Ma'am... Please... You have to crush me.

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GIRLS ON TINDER: You better have a better opener than "hey" GIRLS ON BUMBLE:

Jess, I'm so sorry. I think I just want to be friends. I know that's probably easier said than done. X Today 15:40 I'm so sorry if that hurt. I adore spending time with you. I really hope we can be friends in time. I really have been enjoying sharing our interests and chillin. I'm so sorry kitten. X Message 11:39 ↓

Maybe they are just busy Maybe they've just been asleep for 17 hrs (36hrs later) They still might reply. I'll just msg them again just in case they didn't see my msgs GREMLINS

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You know, when I left the house today I was thinking "Damn, I really hope some hot chick paints my brains all over some f------ hallway." And here we are. I mean really, just absolutely destroy me. I'm talkin' full on, watermelon-in-the-thighs level carnage. And I want it. to scare the s--- outta me. I mean I hope I piss myself. I hope I piss myself and you call me your little "peepee pisspiss boy." I want you to f--- me up. I mean I want you to make me your bitch. Your little peepee-piss- myself-bitch. I want it to get embarressing. I mean like... weirdly embarressing. Unsanitary, too. We should be entirely different people, by the end of the first eight hours. Do you understand what I'm trying to say here? I mean, I'm a real freak. I'm not normal. Ma'am... Please... You have to crush me.

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