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what i actually said: i forgot what my parents heard: i hate you and i am determined to fail at life, go to prison, and bring dishonor to this family. i care about nothing except my computer and tv shows and you can just go burn in hell for all i care. also i'm pregnant Source: arfakita

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tumblr parents forgetting

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rramshackled Follow *Enjoying hyperfixation* I AM SO CRINGE the universal experience pobopolybius +++ Follow *Enjoying hyperfixation* I AM SO CRINGE Be proud of being cringe. Evil even orolith Follow *Enjoying Drive Home* PENTS 239,280 notes 17

sealedbeastnue "what time is it" you ask, i pull out my 2.7 metric ton granite sundial and immediately crush both of your feet, I loudly announce "it is cloudy" Source: sealedbeastnue 10,973 notes D

bunney if ur hair covers ur bu have mermaid hair and are a mermaid i dont make the rules unclewhisky As a man with a hairy chest, I was very, very confused by this post for about ten seconds. sashaforthewin You are a mermaid, sir 80

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"You can't separate the term "faggot" from homophobia."

theblackoaksyndicate+ Dear fellow gamers... You can't separate the term "f-----" from homophobia If you call me a f-----, I'm going to end you, because I don't know what your intentions are from there I don't care that YOU think it means "stupid" or "dumb", all I know is that the word "f-----" preceded a lot, ALOT, of people like me being brutally murdered for reason other than the gender they're attracted to If you're straight, you simply have no place telling me how to react the word f----- because you don't have to live with the history of that word and how it's been used to destroy people like me So, like I said before. If you call me a f-----, l'm going to iail, and you're going to the hospital Period. #w.homophobia #gamergate 57 notes

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It really does feel like that.

Foo Fighters 'Rickroll' the Westboro Baptist Churchh 10:45 AM Monday Aug 24, 2015 psychoticrambling: meladoodle: This headline looks like it's been created by some sort of pop culture meme generator POLITICS Deez Nuts Speaks: Meet Brady Olson, The 15-Year-Old Candidate for President Donald Trump: As president, I wouldn't even have time to comb my hair the way I comb it' this entire year looks like it was created by a s----- online meme generator Trending Source: meladoodle

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You could also add "silverware/certain pieces of food stuck in the garbage disposal" to the list.

aintnobodygotmoneyfodat: loudest noises -dad sneezes -mom yells -trying to get a pot out of the pot cupboard -dropping the shampoo bottle in the shower -flushing the toilet at 3am in the morning -IMAX

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Why would anyone watch this show instead of porn?

iahfy nikoniko808+ starweilder: trying to figure out someone else's shower NAKED Source: starweilder #fav 368,770 notes

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I don't know, that sounds like something out of Jojo to me

outofcontextjojo Thinking on it now, the first dude to look at semen through a microscope must've been like Yoooooo0 #PFFFT #wrong blog #non-jojo 150 notes

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What a sad shark

dO YOU EVEr SAY SOMETHING AS A JOKE AND IT ACCIDENTALLY HURTS SOMEONE'S FEELINGS AND YOU'RE JUST LIKE 134,507 notes Reblogged 21 hours ago from apochedgie (originally from morgrana) Source: morgrana

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Man, that guy Pythagoras must be fun at parties

historical-nonfiction: A Pythagorean cup looks like a normal drinking cup, except that the bowl has a central column in it. It was supposedly invented by Pythagoras of Samos (yes, that one). It allows the user to fill the cup with wine up to a certain level. If the user fills only to that level, the imbiber may enjoy a drink in peace. If, however, the user gets greedy, the cup dumps all the wine into the unfortunate victim's lap Pythagoras sounds like a real a------.

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Happens All the Time, I Even Turn Into the Baboon...

may when you're trying to confirm time sensitive plans with a friend and they're not answering paleosteno Source: may

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Bearrorists

nunown trans-hank-hill: This commercial for Charmin Ultra-Strong has horrifying implications. The fact that there is a security checkpoint for the bear airport (or should I say, bearport) implies that there are certain bears who have malicious intent to blow up the bearplanes. There are bearrorists in this universe that aspire to destroy things that these ass-wiping mammals hold near and dear that bear is naked

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Are you saying that without this product, we send them to insect heaven?

0 AlenInsect Hell THE WORLD OF SWISS APINE CLUB PASECO … PASECO 전격 살충기 5 45000 42000 다슬기수경 3,300 leorizanzel Why just kill the bugs on your porch when you can send them straight to Insect Hell?

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And then the teacher has to yell to shut them up (moreso in middle/high school)

codeinewarrior kengriffey-jr: this is like when the power is out and so you all gotta sit around the th the flashlight just talki comes back or when there's a storm outside and the lights go out in class and everyone starts screaming

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AND OUR SUN SETTER COSTS UNDER $700

short-broody-gay: gemghosts: blanketsandanime: Only Americans will understand: Sun setter retractable awning infomercial IT MAKES OUR PATIO ABOUT 20 DEGREES COOLER THE SUN USED TO MAKE OUR OUTDOOR DECK AND PATIO SPACE SO HOT AND UNCOMFORTABLE, WE COULDN'T USE IT

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+76

Tumblr - Kinda feels like that since parents usually overreact to those 2 words.

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

what i actually said: i forgot what my parents heard: i hate you and i am determined to fail at life, go to prison, and bring dishonor to this family. i care about nothing except my computer and tv shows and you can just go burn in hell for all i care. also i'm pregnant Source: arfakita

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Icecane

Icecane

Aug 28, 2015 at 05:29AM EDT

"I destroyed the very natural laws of nature and the universe so I, a male, could become pregnant. Just to defy you."

+51

Trollanort

Trollanort

Aug 28, 2015 at 02:17PM EDT in reply to ballstothewall

HA! And get my ass snapped in half by a 300 lb. musclebound Pro Football Player or a black lady with anger issues?
Fuck no!
(Srs tho that never works with black parents. I tried once. My mouth was sore for two weeks, I got the SOUL slapped out of me.)

+13

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