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Anon debunks Stacys | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)16:32:04 No.63725215 Do attractive women from well off families have the easiest life paths? >born into wealthy family >grow up popular, everyone nice to them, have their pick of partner in 156 KB JPG hs >too busy having fun in hs to get good grades, doesn't matter >go to random college, party, have a good time while in joke degree like communications >graduate and get s--- job, suddenly life hits them like a tons of bricks >suddenly they're poor for the first time ever >still young and hot though, so things could be worse, still partying >after a year or two slumming it, they realize it sucks, partying getting old >also notice wrinkles etc. for the first time, realize their looks already peaked >decide it's time to pick a rich guy to marry while they are still hot >live rest of life in luxury in exchange for f------ their husband once a week >well anons, does anyone else have it easier?
: Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)16:32:04 No.63725215 Do attractive women from well off families have the easiest life paths? >born into wealthy family >grow up popular, everyone nice to them, have their pick of partner in 156 KB JPG hs >too busy having fun in hs to get good grades, doesn't matter >go to random college, party, have a good time while in joke degree like communications >graduate and get s--- job, suddenly life hits them like a tons of bricks >suddenly they're poor for the first time ever >still young and hot though, so things could be worse, still partying >after a year or two slumming it, they realize it sucks, partying getting old >also notice wrinkles etc. for the first time, realize their looks already peaked >decide it's time to pick a rich guy to marry while they are still hot >live rest of life in luxury in exchange for f------ their husband once a week >well anons, does anyone else have it easier?

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I went through hell to get this | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 05/17/21(Mon)21:37:37 No.854688612 File: 1620191086237.jpg (269 KB, 2057x2429) SAME AS IT EVER WAS >Be me SAME WAS >24M >On my way to eat Subway >practice my order in my head >walk in SAM WAS SAM WAS >finally it's my time to order >Cashier Lady: "welcome to Subway, what can I get you" BAMEA TEH WAS >Me: "uhhhh yeah, can I get a football meat long" >start to panic "ah f---, uhhhh, I meant can I get a meatlong foot sub" >f--- up #2 >"umm never mind, l'll see you later" >walk out >never been back to Subway
O Anonymous 05/17/21(Mon)21:37:37 No.854688612 File: 1620191086237.jpg (269 KB, 2057x2429) SAME AS IT EVER WAS >Be me SAME WAS >24M >On my way to eat Subway >practice my order in my head >walk in SAM WAS SAM WAS >finally it's my time to order >Cashier Lady: "welcome to Subway, what can I get you" BAMEA TEH WAS >Me: "uhhhh yeah, can I get a football meat long" >start to panic "ah f---, uhhhh, I meant can I get a meatlong foot sub" >f--- up #2 >"umm never mind, l'll see you later" >walk out >never been back to Subway

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Anon‘s girlfriend won‘t stop farting | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: qcqw+HFF ) = 07/09/20(Thu)23:57:38 No.267224774 >gf keep farting during sex >i tell her to stop >stop what >stop farting >im not farting >keep f------ her >she keeps farting 167 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: 7/3bbaXz 07/10/20(Fri)00:00:08 No.267225026 Best thread on 4chan right now >>267225105 #
: Anonymous (ID: qcqw+HFF ) = 07/09/20(Thu)23:57:38 No.267224774 >gf keep farting during sex >i tell her to stop >stop what >stop farting >im not farting >keep f------ her >she keeps farting 167 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: 7/3bbaXz 07/10/20(Fri)00:00:08 No.267225026 Best thread on 4chan right now >>267225105 #

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Anon wants to be loved | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous parents 05/18/21(Tue)07:49:44 No.63718866 >be me 12 >parents abbusive as s--- >all of us in living room tv ad plays with cool music >autistic plan made: What if I dance in a cool way to the tv ad that'll surely make them love me right? 40 KB JPG >drop comes >jump out of my chair start some autistic twitching >cat gets scared >runs thru charging cable of dad's laptop and yanks it out of his lap real hard >brakes >they beat me up >pic generic pepe Why can't I ever be loved anons?
: Anonymous parents 05/18/21(Tue)07:49:44 No.63718866 >be me 12 >parents abbusive as s--- >all of us in living room tv ad plays with cool music >autistic plan made: What if I dance in a cool way to the tv ad that'll surely make them love me right? 40 KB JPG >drop comes >jump out of my chair start some autistic twitching >cat gets scared >runs thru charging cable of dad's laptop and yanks it out of his lap real hard >brakes >they beat me up >pic generic pepe Why can't I ever be loved anons?

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Anon doesn‘t realize his luck | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)05:07:55 No.63719328 >still get asked for ID when trying to buy beer >tfw I'm 28 year old 64 KB JPG
: Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)05:07:55 No.63719328 >still get asked for ID when trying to buy beer >tfw I'm 28 year old 64 KB JPG

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Anon extends the night | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)05:03:16 No.63723542 >see sun coming up >block window >cover door cracks >no sunlight >it's still night time now i beat the sun 22 KB PNG 8 Replies / 3 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)05:03:16 No.63723542 >see sun coming up >block window >cover door cracks >no sunlight >it's still night time now i beat the sun 22 KB PNG 8 Replies / 3 Images View Thread

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Anon gets circumcised | /r/Greentext

>into the cartoon "Osmosis Jones" as a kid >watch it nearly every day from age 4-7 >some years pass >im 12 watching p--- for the first time >i try to peel back my foreskin like I see in these videos >its impossible, excruciating pain 683 KB PNG >go to the doctor, I have to get circumcised >its a painful procedure, miss a week of school and everything >as im laying in bed recovering, my dad starts calling me "Phimosis Jones" >a day or two later, one his colleagues has to come over to the house >he introduces me as "my son PJ" and gives me a wink >starts calling me 'PJ' more than my real name >my sisters and mom start calling me PJ too >im now 25 and all my friends and family call me PJ despite my real name starting with a T >when meeting new people they inevitably ask how I got the nickname >I have to tell them about my childhood phimosis >most people get really weirded out by it its not fair, release me from this hell bros
>into the cartoon "Osmosis Jones" as a kid >watch it nearly every day from age 4-7 >some years pass >im 12 watching p--- for the first time >i try to peel back my foreskin like I see in these videos >its impossible, excruciating pain 683 KB PNG >go to the doctor, I have to get circumcised >its a painful procedure, miss a week of school and everything >as im laying in bed recovering, my dad starts calling me "Phimosis Jones" >a day or two later, one his colleagues has to come over to the house >he introduces me as "my son PJ" and gives me a wink >starts calling me 'PJ' more than my real name >my sisters and mom start calling me PJ too >im now 25 and all my friends and family call me PJ despite my real name starting with a T >when meeting new people they inevitably ask how I got the nickname >I have to tell them about my childhood phimosis >most people get really weirded out by it its not fair, release me from this hell bros

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Anon finds the nword funny | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)16:30:27 No.63724041 [Reply] > >>63724129 >Be me >sitting in chair >just now >Randomly remember that the N-word exists >Start chuckling followed by hysterically laughing >No racial implications, it's just funny >Keep repeating "N----- be like" followed by random mouth sound effect in between laughter >Currently crying laughing so, how's your morning, bros?
O Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)16:30:27 No.63724041 [Reply] > >>63724129 >Be me >sitting in chair >just now >Randomly remember that the N-word exists >Start chuckling followed by hysterically laughing >No racial implications, it's just funny >Keep repeating "N----- be like" followed by random mouth sound effect in between laughter >Currently crying laughing so, how's your morning, bros?

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Anon gets used | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/21/19(Sat)08:49:09 No.54508315 >be me >live with a girl >bigtiddygothgf.png >have been with her for 6 years now >there's one problem >she only uses me to satisfy her primal urges 8 KB GIF >every single morning and sometimes before bed she remembers my existence and wants me to fulfil her bodily needs >that's it >besides that, I have no other functions in the relationship >because of it im always stressed and think about losing her, being replaced, always worry that I no longer satisfy her, think that I've become rusty >then suddenly >one day she comes back home visibly depressed >doesn't look at me at all for a while >after a week she suddenly remembers that I exist, and this time it seems like she believes I can help in other ways >she wants to go to the bathroom for some reason >we go there, the bath is filled with hot water >she wants us to bathe together >she gets in first, then helps me climb in as well >suddenly drops me >she's immediately electrocuted >mfw im a toaster
: Anonymous 09/21/19(Sat)08:49:09 No.54508315 >be me >live with a girl >bigtiddygothgf.png >have been with her for 6 years now >there's one problem >she only uses me to satisfy her primal urges 8 KB GIF >every single morning and sometimes before bed she remembers my existence and wants me to fulfil her bodily needs >that's it >besides that, I have no other functions in the relationship >because of it im always stressed and think about losing her, being replaced, always worry that I no longer satisfy her, think that I've become rusty >then suddenly >one day she comes back home visibly depressed >doesn't look at me at all for a while >after a week she suddenly remembers that I exist, and this time it seems like she believes I can help in other ways >she wants to go to the bathroom for some reason >we go there, the bath is filled with hot water >she wants us to bathe together >she gets in first, then helps me climb in as well >suddenly drops me >she's immediately electrocuted >mfw im a toaster

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And yet again Elon Musk saves the day | /r/Greentext

>be me >traveling to Earth to annihilate the human race >see earth >fire up the death ray >too late 19 KB JPG >get hit by a f------ tesla roadster traveling at f------ mach speed playing david bowie >completely destroys my ship and kills my entire crew >mfw
>be me >traveling to Earth to annihilate the human race >see earth >fire up the death ray >too late 19 KB JPG >get hit by a f------ tesla roadster traveling at f------ mach speed playing david bowie >completely destroys my ship and kills my entire crew >mfw

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Anon feels good to be a man | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/18/21 (Tue)06:59:55 No.63718263 >lines on face >t--- saggy and pulling apart >belly growing >only 25 32 KB JPG 17 Replies / 3 Images View Thread : Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)07:30:35 No.63718656 Damn I'm almost the same age OP and my looksmaxxing is going well, feels good to be a man
: Anonymous 05/18/21 (Tue)06:59:55 No.63718263 >lines on face >t--- saggy and pulling apart >belly growing >only 25 32 KB JPG 17 Replies / 3 Images View Thread : Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)07:30:35 No.63718656 Damn I'm almost the same age OP and my looksmaxxing is going well, feels good to be a man

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Anon gets raped | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/28/20(Sat)01:40:34 No.61119312 R---- by girlfriend >get drunk and have sex with girl 2 years ago >that girl eventually becomes my girlfriend >yesterday at a family gathering she says "I actually had to get anon drunk to loosen him up a 141 KB JPG little and make it official" >everyone laughs >it all makes sense now >that day I was really drunk and she was sober >kept handing me drinks and eventually took me to her car and started blowing me I don't mind, honestly, but the fact that everyone laughed it's scary, the double standard. Can you imagine if I would've said that? "Yeah I got her drunk then took her back to my car to f---" CAN YOU IMAGINE? I would've been lynched in the spot. Girls are such hypocrites. My sisters laughed, my female cousins laughed, they said "Yeah anon was too shy, he needed a woman to smack some sense into him" What the f--- is wrong with these w-----, h--------
: Anonymous 11/28/20(Sat)01:40:34 No.61119312 R---- by girlfriend >get drunk and have sex with girl 2 years ago >that girl eventually becomes my girlfriend >yesterday at a family gathering she says "I actually had to get anon drunk to loosen him up a 141 KB JPG little and make it official" >everyone laughs >it all makes sense now >that day I was really drunk and she was sober >kept handing me drinks and eventually took me to her car and started blowing me I don't mind, honestly, but the fact that everyone laughed it's scary, the double standard. Can you imagine if I would've said that? "Yeah I got her drunk then took her back to my car to f---" CAN YOU IMAGINE? I would've been lynched in the spot. Girls are such hypocrites. My sisters laughed, my female cousins laughed, they said "Yeah anon was too shy, he needed a woman to smack some sense into him" What the f--- is wrong with these w-----, h--------

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Anon is american | /r/Greentext

>be American high school student >2019 >multiple school shootings a day >every teacher is now armed >veterans patrol the halls on mobility scooters with built in mini-guns >in Algebra 2 >teacher is handing out the quiz, her full body armor jostling around >reach into my backpack to take out my calculator >her M16 is already trained on me >"ANON DON'T F------ MOVE" >"I-I need my calculator" >"THIS IS A NO CALCULATOR QUIZ WHAT THE F--- ARE YOU REACHING FOR" >"I-I thought we could use calculators" >"YOU THOUGHT WRONG" >tense pause >she lowers her weapon >school shooter takes this opportunity to snipe her from the back of the class >her blood and brains splatters all over my face >second school shooter wheels around in the front with a shotgun, takes aim at the first shooter because he doesn't want to share the headlines >try to run for the door >veteran mobility scooter unit flies in and tears me to shreds firing 6k rounds a minute >die happy knowing that I'm still freer than Europoors >family gets charged 10 mil for my medical expenses (plus tip)
>be American high school student >2019 >multiple school shootings a day >every teacher is now armed >veterans patrol the halls on mobility scooters with built in mini-guns >in Algebra 2 >teacher is handing out the quiz, her full body armor jostling around >reach into my backpack to take out my calculator >her M16 is already trained on me >"ANON DON'T F------ MOVE" >"I-I need my calculator" >"THIS IS A NO CALCULATOR QUIZ WHAT THE F--- ARE YOU REACHING FOR" >"I-I thought we could use calculators" >"YOU THOUGHT WRONG" >tense pause >she lowers her weapon >school shooter takes this opportunity to snipe her from the back of the class >her blood and brains splatters all over my face >second school shooter wheels around in the front with a shotgun, takes aim at the first shooter because he doesn't want to share the headlines >try to run for the door >veteran mobility scooter unit flies in and tears me to shreds firing 6k rounds a minute >die happy knowing that I'm still freer than Europoors >family gets charged 10 mil for my medical expenses (plus tip)

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Anons had a cool dream | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/14/21(Fri)20:52:02 No.9640943 >be me >be 8 >have cool dream that I am Iron man >wake up >mfw 13 КВ PNG Anonymous 05/14/21(Fri)21:11:38 No.9640965 >>9640943 (OP) >Вe me >Have a cool dream about leading the sharks to rebel against humans >Wake up 35 KB JPG >mfw
Anonymous 05/14/21(Fri)20:52:02 No.9640943 >be me >be 8 >have cool dream that I am Iron man >wake up >mfw 13 КВ PNG Anonymous 05/14/21(Fri)21:11:38 No.9640965 >>9640943 (OP) >Вe me >Have a cool dream about leading the sharks to rebel against humans >Wake up 35 KB JPG >mfw

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Anon surveils | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/08/18(Wed)13:06:33 No.776592144 >chinese surveillance system checking peolpe on the streets >scans guy >1.300.000.000 possible matches 13 KB JPG
: Anonymous 08/08/18(Wed)13:06:33 No.776592144 >chinese surveillance system checking peolpe on the streets >scans guy >1.300.000.000 possible matches 13 KB JPG

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Anon picks up pizza | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/01/21 (Mon)19:15:35 No.15680993 >go to store to pick up pizza >about to sign receipt >see they circled in 10% tip >change it to 0 >cashier rolls her eyes, hands me the pizza 31 KB JPG >hear one of them say whisper 'wow, did he really put 0' as l'm walking out Did I do something wrong? It's not like they delivered the pizza to my house. Should I have tipped in this situation?
: Anonymous 03/01/21 (Mon)19:15:35 No.15680993 >go to store to pick up pizza >about to sign receipt >see they circled in 10% tip >change it to 0 >cashier rolls her eyes, hands me the pizza 31 KB JPG >hear one of them say whisper 'wow, did he really put 0' as l'm walking out Did I do something wrong? It's not like they delivered the pizza to my house. Should I have tipped in this situation?

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Anon has game | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 05/24/12(Thu)08:10:11 No.2545562 >be at party >9/10 checking me out >dance with her >stare in eyes >shes got moon earrings >F--- JUST REMEMBERED >run out of party >drive home >spend whole night checking out lunar eclipse >no regrets
O Anonymous 05/24/12(Thu)08:10:11 No.2545562 >be at party >9/10 checking me out >dance with her >stare in eyes >shes got moon earrings >F--- JUST REMEMBERED >run out of party >drive home >spend whole night checking out lunar eclipse >no regrets

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Anon is caught watching porn | /r/Greentext

>15 >watching Asa Akira getting the bwc in my room >unaware mom came home >comes into my room without knocking >quickly close browser >whatwereyouwatchinganon.jpg >why lie, tell her it was p--- >asks me if it was straight p--- >tell her of course, duh >she smiles and hugs me and leaves the room >okaythatwasstrange.png >years later learn it was around the time she learnt my older brother was gay >she was relieved atm I'm not a h---
>15 >watching Asa Akira getting the bwc in my room >unaware mom came home >comes into my room without knocking >quickly close browser >whatwereyouwatchinganon.jpg >why lie, tell her it was p--- >asks me if it was straight p--- >tell her of course, duh >she smiles and hugs me and leaves the room >okaythatwasstrange.png >years later learn it was around the time she learnt my older brother was gay >she was relieved atm I'm not a h---

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Thoughts and prayers | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/12/21(Wed)18:41:16 No.63638981 >YOU WILL CARE ABOUT THE PALESTINE AND ISRAEL CONFLICT >YOU WILL PICK A SIDE >YOU WILL NOT IGNORE IT >YOU WILL LISTEN TO 279 KB PNG TWITTERS POLITICAL RAMBLINGS ABOUT IT >YOU WILL FORM AN OPINION >YOU WILL FEEL BAD FOR THE PEOPLE >YOU WILL SEND YOUR PRAYERS
: Anonymous 05/12/21(Wed)18:41:16 No.63638981 >YOU WILL CARE ABOUT THE PALESTINE AND ISRAEL CONFLICT >YOU WILL PICK A SIDE >YOU WILL NOT IGNORE IT >YOU WILL LISTEN TO 279 KB PNG TWITTERS POLITICAL RAMBLINGS ABOUT IT >YOU WILL FORM AN OPINION >YOU WILL FEEL BAD FOR THE PEOPLE >YOU WILL SEND YOUR PRAYERS

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Anon is a redditor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/13/21 (Thu)12:03:53 No.555385772 76 KB JPG >THATS TOXIC YOU CANT SAY THAT!! >ADMIIIIIN!!
: Anonymous 05/13/21 (Thu)12:03:53 No.555385772 76 KB JPG >THATS TOXIC YOU CANT SAY THAT!! >ADMIIIIIN!!

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