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supermattural: diarrheasmoothie: me praying and thanking the lord for this wonderful meal did you just eat your girl out to hey arnold

supermattural: diarrheasmoothie: me praying and thanking the lord for this wonderful meal did you just eat your girl out to hey arnold

The Defibrillator Toaster My mom would be so annoyed. every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming "WE'RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEPI" "DON'T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!! NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC'S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT! He's bread, Jim Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M If we don't restart his heart, he's toast! JESUS CRUST. JAM IT! "Daddy's in a butter place now, kids.

The Defibrillator Toaster My mom would be so annoyed. every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming "WE'RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEPI" "DON'T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!! NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC'S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT! He's bread, Jim Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M If we don't restart his heart, he's toast! JESUS CRUST. JAM IT! "Daddy's in a butter place now, kids.

defibrilator toaster pun bread toast

iik i wish i could carry around cards at school that have reaction images on it so when someone says something stupid i could just hold up a card and be like this exists it's called facial expression i'd like to see u try and make this face why are you talking to yourself

iik i wish i could carry around cards at school that have reaction images on it so when someone says something stupid i could just hold up a card and be like this exists it's called facial expression i'd like to see u try and make this face why are you talking to yourself

Best florist sign ever.. HON MAD How A. Fresh babyletyourfantasiesunwingd ersinia-pestis merlinsbearditsthedoctor: No but I can just imagine a person bursting through the door screaming "I NEED YOUR HELP. IT'S A NINE" and everyone in the shop stops and all collectively goes "Oh s---" and the florists start working frantically while the man/woman just stands there looking scared as f--- while the other customers are trying to figure out what they did. that must be bad if it's a 9 on an alphabetical scale.

Best florist sign ever.. HON MAD How A. Fresh babyletyourfantasiesunwingd ersinia-pestis merlinsbearditsthedoctor: No but I can just imagine a person bursting through the door screaming "I NEED YOUR HELP. IT'S A NINE" and everyone in the shop stops and all collectively goes "Oh s---" and the florists start working frantically while the man/woman just stands there looking scared as f--- while the other customers are trying to figure out what they did. that must be bad if it's a 9 on an alphabetical scale.

florist sign best mad flowers 9 nine alphabetic scale angry

51-shades-of-clay: onefitmodel Marriage is not about religion. Marriage is not about procreation. The infertile marry Marriage is not about finance. It can weave poverty Marriage is about love. That's it. And that's beautiful. This is perfect the poiticians need to see this. 126,818 notes

51-shades-of-clay: onefitmodel Marriage is not about religion. Marriage is not about procreation. The infertile marry Marriage is not about finance. It can weave poverty Marriage is about love. That's it. And that's beautiful. This is perfect the poiticians need to see this. 126,818 notes

A book

cheesecakemaster i bet its a book

cheesecakemaster i bet its a book

cat cats tumblr present wrapping paper wrapped

cumberbulge: my brother just sat my mum down in the living room and started crying and she was getting really worried and he burst out with "M PREGNANT' completely seriously, and my mum started yelling and was like OH MY GOD, what the f---, I raised you to be responsible' and she was literally ranting for about 10 minutes until she realised and quietly walked out of the room

cumberbulge: my brother just sat my mum down in the living room and started crying and she was getting really worried and he burst out with "M PREGNANT' completely seriously, and my mum started yelling and was like OH MY GOD, what the f---, I raised you to be responsible' and she was literally ranting for about 10 minutes until she realised and quietly walked out of the room

circumcisions there is a 42069% chance there is an immature joke hidden in this post

circumcisions there is a 42069% chance there is an immature joke hidden in this post

th scruffylookinnerfherder: freetheboobs: Imagine being free all the time. Then suddenly as you begin to grow and mature you are trapped in the dark, hidden away, suffocated and only fully released at night. As you continue to grow you may be forced into ridiculously small spaces, or constantly pushed around. That is the tragic life of a boob. #1 don't know what I was expecting #1 should have known by the url

th scruffylookinnerfherder: freetheboobs: Imagine being free all the time. Then suddenly as you begin to grow and mature you are trapped in the dark, hidden away, suffocated and only fully released at night. As you continue to grow you may be forced into ridiculously small spaces, or constantly pushed around. That is the tragic life of a boob. #1 don't know what I was expecting #1 should have known by the url

l y a 4 minutes, à proximité de i swear some peeple r sooooooo stupid! i was on the train and 2 nerds thought the sun was a star! it actually make:s me sad :( J'aime Commenter Partager 1967-dmc-impala rockleah is natural selection a legit excuse to murder someone "Why did you kill this person?"-shows said status. "you're free to go,"

l y a 4 minutes, à proximité de i swear some peeple r sooooooo stupid! i was on the train and 2 nerds thought the sun was a star! it actually make:s me sad :( J'aime Commenter Partager 1967-dmc-impala rockleah is natural selection a legit excuse to murder someone "Why did you kill this person?"-shows said status. "you're free to go,"

lindsaychrist ive been fired from taco bell 4 separate times but i keep just showing up for work and they forget

lindsaychrist ive been fired from taco bell 4 separate times but i keep just showing up for work and they forget

funkycops indiandaughter Source: imagineyouricon Imagine your icon backing you against a wall and softly kissing you 1,992 notes nuviffme I AMLGUGHIGN AT THE SPEEDE OF FAST

funkycops indiandaughter Source: imagineyouricon Imagine your icon backing you against a wall and softly kissing you 1,992 notes nuviffme I AMLGUGHIGN AT THE SPEEDE OF FAST

raveyrai khaillou Jehovah Witnesses dont celebrate halloween I guess they don 't appreciate random people coming up to their doors.

raveyrai khaillou Jehovah Witnesses dont celebrate halloween I guess they don 't appreciate random people coming up to their doors.

tumblr jehovah's witnesses halloween kermit

The Austrian army made a big mistake

scienceing: if you ever think that you've made a big mistake, just remember that in 1788 the Austrian army attacked itself and lost 10,000 men

scienceing: if you ever think that you've made a big mistake, just remember that in 1788 the Austrian army attacked itself and lost 10,000 men

austria mistake tumblr

yunakawaiinigga

yunakawaiinigga

heyso... uhh. (looks at notecards) did you uh did...you fall out of heaven because um (drops cards) s--- f--- oh god f--- im so sorry youre-youre just s o.pretty i m soryr IF SOMEONE DID THIS TO ME I WOULD F--- THEM ON THE SPOT (blushes furiously) (picks up cards) (looks through them desperately) i um.. dont have a card for...this situation.

heyso... uhh. (looks at notecards) did you uh did...you fall out of heaven because um (drops cards) s--- f--- oh god f--- im so sorry youre-youre just s o.pretty i m soryr IF SOMEONE DID THIS TO ME I WOULD F--- THEM ON THE SPOT (blushes furiously) (picks up cards) (looks through them desperately) i um.. dont have a card for...this situation.

Feminist Vegan strikes again

2 RIfRiend o e ph-baby-iesus busridawip: sassvoriest g: Are you F------ KIDDING ME. This makes me want I f------ VOMIT BLOOD. Not only is this cis gendered little s--- trying to wrangle some poor woman into the essential male dominated enslavement otherwise known as a relationship, but he's also done it by desecrating the corpse of an animal. People fike you should be culled. Do you live in a warehouse where machine suck the milk from your n------ until you are RAW??? WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME SOMEONE SLAUGHTERED YOUR FAMILY AND PUT THEM ON A PIZZA. I hope you get struck my a slow moving steamroller you suck son of a bitch. found the vegan

2 RIfRiend o e ph-baby-iesus busridawip: sassvoriest g: Are you F------ KIDDING ME. This makes me want I f------ VOMIT BLOOD. Not only is this cis gendered little s--- trying to wrangle some poor woman into the essential male dominated enslavement otherwise known as a relationship, but he's also done it by desecrating the corpse of an animal. People fike you should be culled. Do you live in a warehouse where machine suck the milk from your n------ until you are RAW??? WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME SOMEONE SLAUGHTERED YOUR FAMILY AND PUT THEM ON A PIZZA. I hope you get struck my a slow moving steamroller you suck son of a bitch. found the vegan

cles I'm hungry ; eat my child And thus the importance of commas arises.

cles I'm hungry ; eat my child And thus the importance of commas arises.

i'm hungry eat my child comma commas

brookehathaway- de-ath 16,794 youredoingalrightkid themichaeljordanofdrunkdriving dolphitler themichaeljordanofdrunkdriving roses are black violets are black im blind blind people are going to find this offensive I don't think blind people are going to find anything Source: themichaeljordanofd

brookehathaway- de-ath 16,794 youredoingalrightkid themichaeljordanofdrunkdriving dolphitler themichaeljordanofdrunkdriving roses are black violets are black im blind blind people are going to find this offensive I don't think blind people are going to find anything Source: themichaeljordanofd

aiclan quirkybrittany 7am waking up in the morning gotta be fresh gotta go downstairs lol jk going back to sleep bye (*.. ︶..) It's always a good time at quirkybrittany. Follow her for a peasant and hipster-free blogging experience AN(★ ★ #7am #AM #FM #radio拱all out #new vegas #vegas #las vegas #what happens in vegas #stays in vegas #stay #rihanna #right now #david guetta #titanium #platinum #rhodium #ruthenium #expensive #shopping #louis vuitton #louisiana #new Orleans #the originals #klaus mikaelson #joseph morgan #british #british accent #hot #summer quirkybrittany is on a level of blogging that we can only dream to one day understand

aiclan quirkybrittany 7am waking up in the morning gotta be fresh gotta go downstairs lol jk going back to sleep bye (*.. ︶..) It's always a good time at quirkybrittany. Follow her for a peasant and hipster-free blogging experience AN(★ ★ #7am #AM #FM #radio拱all out #new vegas #vegas #las vegas #what happens in vegas #stays in vegas #stay #rihanna #right now #david guetta #titanium #platinum #rhodium #ruthenium #expensive #shopping #louis vuitton #louisiana #new Orleans #the originals #klaus mikaelson #joseph morgan #british #british accent #hot #summer quirkybrittany is on a level of blogging that we can only dream to one day understand