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Anon just holds | /r/Greentext

File: 3037203a54976986db1fc911c(...).jpg (85 KB, 586x719) ☐ Anonymous (ID: NiJe32en ) 08/12/24(Mon)19:05:05 No.58857903 >Be me >Start investing around 2016 >Put all my money in big tech. apple, nvidia, microsoft, etc. >Migrant crisis, stocks drop >Just hold >Chinese banks f--- up, stocks drop >Just hold >Turkish economy implodes, stocks drop >Just hold >Covid-19 financial crash, stocks drop >Just hold >Also buy some facebook stock with new job money >Chinese banks go bust, stocks drop >Just hold >Russia invades Ukraine, stocks drop >Just hold >Almost a millionaire now >Never panic sold >Never listened to any financial advice >Never did any day trading >Look at my banking app maybe once a month >Just buy stock in a tech company and hold Are boomers just f------ retarded? Why was 2008 such a big deal? They made it seem like the world ended when I was a kid. Why did everyone act like they lost everything? It's not real money unless you sell. Literally nothing happens if you JUST HOLD!
File: 3037203a54976986db1fc911c(...).jpg (85 KB, 586x719) ☐ Anonymous (ID: NiJe32en ) 08/12/24(Mon)19:05:05 No.58857903 >Be me >Start investing around 2016 >Put all my money in big tech. apple, nvidia, microsoft, etc. >Migrant crisis, stocks drop >Just hold >Chinese banks f--- up, stocks drop >Just hold >Turkish economy implodes, stocks drop >Just hold >Covid-19 financial crash, stocks drop >Just hold >Also buy some facebook stock with new job money >Chinese banks go bust, stocks drop >Just hold >Russia invades Ukraine, stocks drop >Just hold >Almost a millionaire now >Never panic sold >Never listened to any financial advice >Never did any day trading >Look at my banking app maybe once a month >Just buy stock in a tech company and hold Are boomers just f------ retarded? Why was 2008 such a big deal? They made it seem like the world ended when I was a kid. Why did everyone act like they lost everything? It's not real money unless you sell. Literally nothing happens if you JUST HOLD!

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Anon grills for his family | /r/Greentext

48 KB JPG >awwyiss.jpg >be me, 35-year-old office worker >job is stressful af, constant deadlines and angry clients >come home every day feeling drained >but then I see my family and everything changes >wife greets me with a hug, kids run up yelling "Daddy's home!" >feel the stress melting away >remember it's grilling night >put on my "Kiss the Cook" apron >fire up my pride and joy, a top-of-the-line Weber grill >marinated steaks have been waiting all day for this moment >throw on some corn, peppers, and zucchini too >stand there with tongs in hand, master of my domain >clicky Tongs.tiff >wife brings me a cold beer, kisses my cheek >kids play in the backyard, laughter filling the air >flip the steaks, perfect grill marks >the sizzle is music to my ears >family gathers around as I plate up the food >take first bite of perfectly medium-rare steak >life is good >realize I don't need much in life >just my family and my grill >go to bed happy, ready to face another day at work >because I know what's waiting for me at home >thank you family, thank you grill, I love you
48 KB JPG >awwyiss.jpg >be me, 35-year-old office worker >job is stressful af, constant deadlines and angry clients >come home every day feeling drained >but then I see my family and everything changes >wife greets me with a hug, kids run up yelling "Daddy's home!" >feel the stress melting away >remember it's grilling night >put on my "Kiss the Cook" apron >fire up my pride and joy, a top-of-the-line Weber grill >marinated steaks have been waiting all day for this moment >throw on some corn, peppers, and zucchini too >stand there with tongs in hand, master of my domain >clicky Tongs.tiff >wife brings me a cold beer, kisses my cheek >kids play in the backyard, laughter filling the air >flip the steaks, perfect grill marks >the sizzle is music to my ears >family gathers around as I plate up the food >take first bite of perfectly medium-rare steak >life is good >realize I don't need much in life >just my family and my grill >go to bed happy, ready to face another day at work >because I know what's waiting for me at home >thank you family, thank you grill, I love you

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Peak fiction. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Data Transfer Grand Fate Order Touch Screen TH ANILEX DELIGHT WORKS Inc. >"historical game" 43 KB JPG >turns every major historical figure into cute anime girls
Anonymous Data Transfer Grand Fate Order Touch Screen TH ANILEX DELIGHT WORKS Inc. >"historical game" 43 KB JPG >turns every major historical figure into cute anime girls

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Anon works retail | /r/Greentext

File: RDT 20240812 115228363875(...).jpg (59 KB, 1200x1200) Anonymous 08/12/24(Mon) 12:05:09 No.922768939 >be me, working at grocery store >Guy stops and asks me and asks what the difference between cage free, free range pasture raised >I explain >" So the regular store brand are the ones that basically sit around and peck each other's eyes out and stuff?" >"Yea" >"Thanks, good to know" >Guy walks out with 8 boxes of regular eggs [Return] [Catalog] [Top] [Update] [Auto] [Post a Reply] 0/0/?
File: RDT 20240812 115228363875(...).jpg (59 KB, 1200x1200) Anonymous 08/12/24(Mon) 12:05:09 No.922768939 >be me, working at grocery store >Guy stops and asks me and asks what the difference between cage free, free range pasture raised >I explain >" So the regular store brand are the ones that basically sit around and peck each other's eyes out and stuff?" >"Yea" >"Thanks, good to know" >Guy walks out with 8 boxes of regular eggs [Return] [Catalog] [Top] [Update] [Auto] [Post a Reply] 0/0/?

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anon talks about the female fantasy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous LIVELY IT ENDS WITH US SALA COLLEEN HOGAR EXCLUSIVELY IN MOVIE THEATERS ALKAST 08/12/24(Mon) 12:00:06 No.78469305 This is the ultimate female fantasy. It is what every roastie, femcel, e-girl and tradwife want. You will begin to hear about this movie a lot more in the coming weeks. 104 KB JPG Anonymous : Anonymous >>78469458 # Anonymous >>78469443 # 08/12/24(Mon) 12:07:19 No.78469365 08/12/24(Mon) 12:18:57 No.78469443 08/12/24(Mon)12:20:09 No.78469458 Shameless /tv/ repost >the protagonist is a generic woman who wants to open a floral shop >her name is Lily Bloom (get it? Lily is a flower and flowers bloom!) >her father abused her mother and she has daddy issues as a result >she meets a traumatized, rage-filled chad who is a neurosurgeon >chad tells her that he accidentally shot and killed his brother when they were kids >chad is abusive towards her, leaving her bruised >when chad finds another man's number in her phone, he pushes her down the stairs >later chad tries to r--- her and knocks her unconscious >she ends up pregnant with chad's kid >now that she's secured his genes, she kicks chad out of her life >she finds the nice guy she rejected when they were young and tells him that she's ready for him now >the nice guy helps her raise chad's kid >the cycle of abuse ends with Lily and her kid... until the sequel, of course
: Anonymous LIVELY IT ENDS WITH US SALA COLLEEN HOGAR EXCLUSIVELY IN MOVIE THEATERS ALKAST 08/12/24(Mon) 12:00:06 No.78469305 This is the ultimate female fantasy. It is what every roastie, femcel, e-girl and tradwife want. You will begin to hear about this movie a lot more in the coming weeks. 104 KB JPG Anonymous : Anonymous >>78469458 # Anonymous >>78469443 # 08/12/24(Mon) 12:07:19 No.78469365 08/12/24(Mon) 12:18:57 No.78469443 08/12/24(Mon)12:20:09 No.78469458 Shameless /tv/ repost >the protagonist is a generic woman who wants to open a floral shop >her name is Lily Bloom (get it? Lily is a flower and flowers bloom!) >her father abused her mother and she has daddy issues as a result >she meets a traumatized, rage-filled chad who is a neurosurgeon >chad tells her that he accidentally shot and killed his brother when they were kids >chad is abusive towards her, leaving her bruised >when chad finds another man's number in her phone, he pushes her down the stairs >later chad tries to r--- her and knocks her unconscious >she ends up pregnant with chad's kid >now that she's secured his genes, she kicks chad out of her life >she finds the nice guy she rejected when they were young and tells him that she's ready for him now >the nice guy helps her raise chad's kid >the cycle of abuse ends with Lily and her kid... until the sequel, of course

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A taste of your own medicine | /r/Greentext

Anonymous → 08/07/24(Wed) 03:42:09 No.200661655 th-2787909554.jpg 18 KB JPG >invades half of the world >complains about being invaded what did they mean by this
Anonymous → 08/07/24(Wed) 03:42:09 No.200661655 th-2787909554.jpg 18 KB JPG >invades half of the world >complains about being invaded what did they mean by this

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Anon is in love with the legend | /r/Greentext

File: 1384015653236.gif-(3 MB, 416x405, sad boss.gif) GO 00 00 Anonymous 11/09/13(Sat)11:47 UTC-5 No.217367432 Replies: >>217367735 >>217367839 >>217367934 >>217368005 >>217368007 >>217368101 >>217368213 >>217368318 >>217368332 >>217368557 >>217368638 >>217368639 >>217368746 >>217368793 >>217368885>>217368897 >>217368906 >>217368936 >>217369192 >>217369197>>217369947 >>217370617 >>217370651 >>217370743 >>217370929 >>217371345 >>217371543 >>217372025 >>217372335 >>217372589 >>217373079 >>217373274 >>217374096 >>217374636 >>217375214 >>217375570 >>217375891 >>217376593 >>217376596 >>217376673 >>217377858 >>217379472 >>217379810 >Acquire a girlfriend >She's a solid 6/10 >Spend time together >One day she finds a picture of Big Boss in my wallet >Since then she acts weird >Finally, she finds my Big Boss folder on my pc >2GB of Big Boss p---, speeches, motivational posters and cosplay >Notices my collection of vidya games isn't all that impressive, but I have all MGS titles next to a Big Boss figurine and my BB husbando picture where I feed my monitor showing Big Boss doritos and yerba mate >Demands I delete my folder and hide eveything Big Boss related, consoles included or she leaves >Gives me 24 hours >16 hours have passed What do I do, /v/? I can't just abandon Big Boss.
File: 1384015653236.gif-(3 MB, 416x405, sad boss.gif) GO 00 00 Anonymous 11/09/13(Sat)11:47 UTC-5 No.217367432 Replies: >>217367735 >>217367839 >>217367934 >>217368005 >>217368007 >>217368101 >>217368213 >>217368318 >>217368332 >>217368557 >>217368638 >>217368639 >>217368746 >>217368793 >>217368885>>217368897 >>217368906 >>217368936 >>217369192 >>217369197>>217369947 >>217370617 >>217370651 >>217370743 >>217370929 >>217371345 >>217371543 >>217372025 >>217372335 >>217372589 >>217373079 >>217373274 >>217374096 >>217374636 >>217375214 >>217375570 >>217375891 >>217376593 >>217376596 >>217376673 >>217377858 >>217379472 >>217379810 >Acquire a girlfriend >She's a solid 6/10 >Spend time together >One day she finds a picture of Big Boss in my wallet >Since then she acts weird >Finally, she finds my Big Boss folder on my pc >2GB of Big Boss p---, speeches, motivational posters and cosplay >Notices my collection of vidya games isn't all that impressive, but I have all MGS titles next to a Big Boss figurine and my BB husbando picture where I feed my monitor showing Big Boss doritos and yerba mate >Demands I delete my folder and hide eveything Big Boss related, consoles included or she leaves >Gives me 24 hours >16 hours have passed What do I do, /v/? I can't just abandon Big Boss.

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Anon is a child. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 137 KB PNG 08/12/24(Mon)06:01:51 No.78467666 >naturally lipsmaxxd >still a khhv >tfw >be me, 17M >gifted with good hair genes >strong jawline >elevated cheek bones >elevated collar bone >deep set eyes >good voice/ vocal control >minimal body fat ratio >perfect acne free skin Like what more do I need to do in order to have a nice gf? I'm naturally looksmaxxpilled I already tick all the boxes of everything deemed 'hot' by societal standards and still no sign of girls. what is this hypocrisy? Anonymous 08/12/24(Mon)06:03:43 No.78467677 >>78467666 (OP) Leave this website you stupid f------ child
Anonymous 137 KB PNG 08/12/24(Mon)06:01:51 No.78467666 >naturally lipsmaxxd >still a khhv >tfw >be me, 17M >gifted with good hair genes >strong jawline >elevated cheek bones >elevated collar bone >deep set eyes >good voice/ vocal control >minimal body fat ratio >perfect acne free skin Like what more do I need to do in order to have a nice gf? I'm naturally looksmaxxpilled I already tick all the boxes of everything deemed 'hot' by societal standards and still no sign of girls. what is this hypocrisy? Anonymous 08/12/24(Mon)06:03:43 No.78467677 >>78467666 (OP) Leave this website you stupid f------ child

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Anon needs to fix his diet | /r/Greentext

Anonymous DO NOT ONLY EAT PROTEIN BARS Normal Bladder. Impacted 72 KB JPG Im poor Rectum >Start s------- less 08/09/24(Fri)22:18:29 No.74875553 Holy f--- I cant stress this enough don't eat just protein bars >Be me >Two months ago find new protein bar that is only 150 calories but 20g of protein >F--- it gonna just eat these cause >Notice my gut growing >Cut down on protein bars but s--- stopped coming out of my ass >Uh oh >Go to doctor >Fecal impaction >They give me laxatives and wait an hour >Nothing >They shove a tube up my ass and give me an enema >Feels kinda good ngl >A little bit comes out, but not enough >Get rushed to surgery >Take out 25lbs of s--- >Leave with 100k in medical debt Jesus Christ this was the worst idea ive ever had. Please dont eat only protein bars just eat some fiber
Anonymous DO NOT ONLY EAT PROTEIN BARS Normal Bladder. Impacted 72 KB JPG Im poor Rectum >Start s------- less 08/09/24(Fri)22:18:29 No.74875553 Holy f--- I cant stress this enough don't eat just protein bars >Be me >Two months ago find new protein bar that is only 150 calories but 20g of protein >F--- it gonna just eat these cause >Notice my gut growing >Cut down on protein bars but s--- stopped coming out of my ass >Uh oh >Go to doctor >Fecal impaction >They give me laxatives and wait an hour >Nothing >They shove a tube up my ass and give me an enema >Feels kinda good ngl >A little bit comes out, but not enough >Get rushed to surgery >Take out 25lbs of s--- >Leave with 100k in medical debt Jesus Christ this was the worst idea ive ever had. Please dont eat only protein bars just eat some fiber

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Rapid Response | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/19/24(Fri)18:38:08 No.201456267 John_Blackthorne_Shogun.jpg 52 KB JPG >betrays Christianity >betrays his family >betrays his country All so he could take a Japanese wife and larp as a Samurai.
Anonymous 07/19/24(Fri)18:38:08 No.201456267 John_Blackthorne_Shogun.jpg 52 KB JPG >betrays Christianity >betrays his family >betrays his country All so he could take a Japanese wife and larp as a Samurai.

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F for anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 35 KB JPG (Tue)11:06:01 No.79421618 Let's write a story one line at a time, I'll start >be me
Anonymous 35 KB JPG (Tue)11:06:01 No.79421618 Let's write a story one line at a time, I'll start >be me

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Anon and mosquito? | /r/Greentext

84 KB PNG >mosquito in my room >buzzes around me >craves me >wants me >first living being in weeks interacting with me >feel the need to be her close >undress >so mosquito has easier time being close to me >she gets closer >i get hard >finally bites me >c-- I feel abused she left me just seconds later and never looked back Is this what a summer love feels like? Our time together was short but intense
84 KB PNG >mosquito in my room >buzzes around me >craves me >wants me >first living being in weeks interacting with me >feel the need to be her close >undress >so mosquito has easier time being close to me >she gets closer >i get hard >finally bites me >c-- I feel abused she left me just seconds later and never looked back Is this what a summer love feels like? Our time together was short but intense

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New Psy-Op Cat Just Dropped Folks - Have Fun | /r/Greentext


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The long arm of Divine law | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/07/24(Wed)00:49:54 No.202216220 Hellfire.jpg 18 KB JPG >AHHHHH NOOOO G-D WHY DID YOU PUNISH ME FOR PIRATING HOLLYWOOD MOVIES? I THOUGHT YOU DIDN'T CONSIDER THEFT TO BE A SIN IF ITS DONE DIGITALLY
Anonymous 08/07/24(Wed)00:49:54 No.202216220 Hellfire.jpg 18 KB JPG >AHHHHH NOOOO G-D WHY DID YOU PUNISH ME FOR PIRATING HOLLYWOOD MOVIES? I THOUGHT YOU DIDN'T CONSIDER THEFT TO BE A SIN IF ITS DONE DIGITALLY

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Anon goes to the gym. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 36 KB JPG 08/11/24(Sun)12:02:11 No.78459224 >be me, manlet, at the gym >only two other people there >one is a girl working out at machines right next to me >the other is a dude of average height working out at the other end of the hall >the girl goes to a new machine >obviously struggling to adjust the machine >she shortly looks at me, then turns away in disgust >walks all the way to the other guy to ask him for help >he tells her he doesn't know that machine or how to adjust it >instead of asking me she insists that he tries to help her This is the repulsive power of manletism.
Anonymous 36 KB JPG 08/11/24(Sun)12:02:11 No.78459224 >be me, manlet, at the gym >only two other people there >one is a girl working out at machines right next to me >the other is a dude of average height working out at the other end of the hall >the girl goes to a new machine >obviously struggling to adjust the machine >she shortly looks at me, then turns away in disgust >walks all the way to the other guy to ask him for help >he tells her he doesn't know that machine or how to adjust it >instead of asking me she insists that he tries to help her This is the repulsive power of manletism.

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Anon on being called a fat loser | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 45243472 42,2 KB JPG >be me >22 yo >overweight beta loser >decide to f--- it all and get my life in control >get new clothes >go to the gym >work out harder than ever in my life >sweat dripping off me >can't feel my legs >a couple of chads walk by >hear one of them say to the other >"What a fat loser" >... >He's technically right >I am losing a lot of fat 3 REPLIES O IMAGES Anonymous 45243502 Nice keep going man REPLY
Anonymous 45243472 42,2 KB JPG >be me >22 yo >overweight beta loser >decide to f--- it all and get my life in control >get new clothes >go to the gym >work out harder than ever in my life >sweat dripping off me >can't feel my legs >a couple of chads walk by >hear one of them say to the other >"What a fat loser" >... >He's technically right >I am losing a lot of fat 3 REPLIES O IMAGES Anonymous 45243502 Nice keep going man REPLY

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Just do some NETWORKING | /r/Greentext

63KiB, 423x393, 67g58h76.png dude just NETWORK Anonymous Fri 09 Feb 2024 20:23:34 No.98915625 View Quoted By: >>98915637 >>98915744 >>98915767 >>98915785 >>98916045 >bro just NETWORK have you tried NETWORKING?! >i didn't have a job until I started NETWORKING brooo you gotta increase your NETWORK SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP
63KiB, 423x393, 67g58h76.png dude just NETWORK Anonymous Fri 09 Feb 2024 20:23:34 No.98915625 View Quoted By: >>98915637 >>98915744 >>98915767 >>98915785 >>98916045 >bro just NETWORK have you tried NETWORKING?! >i didn't have a job until I started NETWORKING brooo you gotta increase your NETWORK SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

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anon is a prosecutor | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 208 KB JPEG 2024-08-07, 7:06:17 p.m. No.61478096 > be prosecution with chill and suave mannerism, respected by general lawyer community as a whole > so respected you have an assistant that makes you your own coffee brew to drink during case > famed "never lost a case" defense attorney gets to be in your first ever trial > attorney starts spouting out about some random ass b-------, jumping through so many hoops the m----------- could be in a circus > Imaowtf.jpg > calmly sipping coffee and talking about mild philosophy while observing his claims > judge is about to cast verdict > yell "Hold it." and watch the entire court go silent "What is it, Anon?" > i can just say whatever b------- i want and people will respect me for it "the one who prefers to piss in the sink ends up sinking in the piss..." > everyone is utterly f------ dumbfounded "if you will. consider for a moment that the story you've just created is off by a little bit. just because the witness wasn't at the building the mentioned doesn't mean he killed a man in an entirely different building 10 miles away." > sip 12th cup of coffee, enjoying the taste; an especially deep and rich brew, gonna have to thank my assistant for the convenient timing "the witness, being a very rich detective, could have merely just been at his house. maybe at the grocery store. honestly, who cares? all i'm saying is your loops are bogus. stick to normal explanations next time... the taller a building is built, the harder it breaks when it falls." > dumbass Peedicks defense sweating bullets and burying his head in his hands > calmly sip coffee as the entire jury snickers at his bullshittery I love my job.
Anonymous 208 KB JPEG 2024-08-07, 7:06:17 p.m. No.61478096 > be prosecution with chill and suave mannerism, respected by general lawyer community as a whole > so respected you have an assistant that makes you your own coffee brew to drink during case > famed "never lost a case" defense attorney gets to be in your first ever trial > attorney starts spouting out about some random ass b-------, jumping through so many hoops the m----------- could be in a circus > Imaowtf.jpg > calmly sipping coffee and talking about mild philosophy while observing his claims > judge is about to cast verdict > yell "Hold it." and watch the entire court go silent "What is it, Anon?" > i can just say whatever b------- i want and people will respect me for it "the one who prefers to piss in the sink ends up sinking in the piss..." > everyone is utterly f------ dumbfounded "if you will. consider for a moment that the story you've just created is off by a little bit. just because the witness wasn't at the building the mentioned doesn't mean he killed a man in an entirely different building 10 miles away." > sip 12th cup of coffee, enjoying the taste; an especially deep and rich brew, gonna have to thank my assistant for the convenient timing "the witness, being a very rich detective, could have merely just been at his house. maybe at the grocery store. honestly, who cares? all i'm saying is your loops are bogus. stick to normal explanations next time... the taller a building is built, the harder it breaks when it falls." > dumbass Peedicks defense sweating bullets and burying his head in his hands > calmly sip coffee as the entire jury snickers at his bullshittery I love my job.

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anon deals with a thief | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 172 KB JPG 08/11/24(Sun) 20:04:02 No.922738503 >be me >retardville university >some retard keeps saying my name >ignore him, say hi and that i am busy >retard takes my s---, tries playing keepaway for no reason >says he is trying to talk to me >ask for my s--- back >doesn't do it >ask 4 more times, still doesn't do it >finally scream slurs at him to give me my s--- back, friend comes in and demands retard give me my s--- back, friend knows how I get p----- >retard obliges, doesn't apologize and f---- off >mfw it could've been avoided had he not stolen my s--- >yet another day of retardville university I am so f------ done with this s---, all he had to do was be a normal person and realize stealing peoples s--- will make them mad.
Anonymous 172 KB JPG 08/11/24(Sun) 20:04:02 No.922738503 >be me >retardville university >some retard keeps saying my name >ignore him, say hi and that i am busy >retard takes my s---, tries playing keepaway for no reason >says he is trying to talk to me >ask for my s--- back >doesn't do it >ask 4 more times, still doesn't do it >finally scream slurs at him to give me my s--- back, friend comes in and demands retard give me my s--- back, friend knows how I get p----- >retard obliges, doesn't apologize and f---- off >mfw it could've been avoided had he not stolen my s--- >yet another day of retardville university I am so f------ done with this s---, all he had to do was be a normal person and realize stealing peoples s--- will make them mad.

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Anon joins an American server | /r/Greentext

No.89625332 2 minutes ago Canada >playing an FPS >join an American server >hear gunfire around me, duck for cover >don't see any enemies around >realize one of my teammates left his microphone on
No.89625332 2 minutes ago Canada >playing an FPS >join an American server >hear gunfire around me, duck for cover >don't see any enemies around >realize one of my teammates left his microphone on

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