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My heart is yours to sever | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 365 KB PNG 10/14/24(Mon)06:40:44 No.79117226 >this drug addict turkish guy sends a vid to her ex 1 year ago, talking about how he literally waited 2 hours next to her house to kill her >fast forward >1 week ago >dude invites her over for outdoor sex >she literally FOLLOWS him >she arrives fully shaven head to toe >they spend 4 hours together in a restricted section of a historic castle >turns out the dude was into snuff >beheads and dismembers her ex >kills himself afterwards >feminists all over the streets protesting about their little dark triad loving angel kek
Anonymous 365 KB PNG 10/14/24(Mon)06:40:44 No.79117226 >this drug addict turkish guy sends a vid to her ex 1 year ago, talking about how he literally waited 2 hours next to her house to kill her >fast forward >1 week ago >dude invites her over for outdoor sex >she literally FOLLOWS him >she arrives fully shaven head to toe >they spend 4 hours together in a restricted section of a historic castle >turns out the dude was into snuff >beheads and dismembers her ex >kills himself afterwards >feminists all over the streets protesting about their little dark triad loving angel kek

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Locked away with you forever | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous A good chunk of Incels can't g(...) 12 KB JPG 10/14/24(Mon)02:26:00 No.79115296 >Be niganon >See N---- hate thread made by incels >Get called an animal >They start calling women w----- and bitches >The call women who f--- black people animal f------ >Same MFs bitch about being lonely. You n----- really don't understand why femcels don't wanna f--- you? If you legitimately stopped blaming everyone but yourself and took the actual care to become a functioning member of society, you wouldn't be in your current state. You DON'T have to be a chad, you f------ all want a 10/10 Japanese cutie when you're basement dwellers. For f---- sake, take a 10 minute jog everyday and shower. it's legitimately not f------ hard.
: Anonymous A good chunk of Incels can't g(...) 12 KB JPG 10/14/24(Mon)02:26:00 No.79115296 >Be niganon >See N---- hate thread made by incels >Get called an animal >They start calling women w----- and bitches >The call women who f--- black people animal f------ >Same MFs bitch about being lonely. You n----- really don't understand why femcels don't wanna f--- you? If you legitimately stopped blaming everyone but yourself and took the actual care to become a functioning member of society, you wouldn't be in your current state. You DON'T have to be a chad, you f------ all want a 10/10 Japanese cutie when you're basement dwellers. For f---- sake, take a 10 minute jog everyday and shower. it's legitimately not f------ hard.

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Web of ignorance | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/06/24(Sun)16:52:57 No.204224651 172822573683112550.png 686 KB PNG >Peter, I don't want to hear about your 2 jobs, university, internship, dead parents, dead uncle and 1 living related soul who is a sick old lady, financial struggles, loss of your house and your scooter that got demolished in a car accident. Why didn't you show up to my play? I have to f--- Chad now, bye
: Anonymous 10/06/24(Sun)16:52:57 No.204224651 172822573683112550.png 686 KB PNG >Peter, I don't want to hear about your 2 jobs, university, internship, dead parents, dead uncle and 1 living related soul who is a sick old lady, financial struggles, loss of your house and your scooter that got demolished in a car accident. Why didn't you show up to my play? I have to f--- Chad now, bye

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"Real" Pork | /r/Greentext

Board /int/ - International Anonymousa McDonald's ▼Settings Mobile Home 10/14/24(Mon)01:41:18 No.203396949 McRib 909 KB PNG >McRib is coming back to the UK in two days So americanons, what am I in for? Anonymous 10/14/24(Mon)01:42:48 No.203396961 slop made by indians who dont wash their hands after pooping Anonymous 10/14/24(Mon)01:44:28 No.203396985 Nothing. The McRib is legendary for it's shittiness. McD only does the McRib when pork prices are very low, and you're getting grade C and D pork from a grocery warehouse liquidator. It's a slab of pork chop lathered in pork flavored sauce. It's dry and spam is better. I'm not kidding, since spam uses better grade pork and is much more moist. A spam sandwich costs less and you can buy regular pork dressing. McD pork flavor is just bbq sauce with added sugar. Anonymous 10/14/24(Mon)01:45:29 No.203396994 The McRib is why muslims don't eat pork. It's worth $4, but not $5. At that point two mcdoubles are better. Anonymous >>203396949 (OP). Diarrhea. 10/14/24(Mon)01:45:49 No.203396999
Board /int/ - International Anonymousa McDonald's ▼Settings Mobile Home 10/14/24(Mon)01:41:18 No.203396949 McRib 909 KB PNG >McRib is coming back to the UK in two days So americanons, what am I in for? Anonymous 10/14/24(Mon)01:42:48 No.203396961 slop made by indians who dont wash their hands after pooping Anonymous 10/14/24(Mon)01:44:28 No.203396985 Nothing. The McRib is legendary for it's shittiness. McD only does the McRib when pork prices are very low, and you're getting grade C and D pork from a grocery warehouse liquidator. It's a slab of pork chop lathered in pork flavored sauce. It's dry and spam is better. I'm not kidding, since spam uses better grade pork and is much more moist. A spam sandwich costs less and you can buy regular pork dressing. McD pork flavor is just bbq sauce with added sugar. Anonymous 10/14/24(Mon)01:45:29 No.203396994 The McRib is why muslims don't eat pork. It's worth $4, but not $5. At that point two mcdoubles are better. Anonymous >>203396949 (OP). Diarrhea. 10/14/24(Mon)01:45:49 No.203396999

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Gamers finally rise up against anon | /r/Greentext

Good grief. Anonymous 10/13/24(Sun)18:30:22 No.691771054 >>691771205 >Gamers finally rise up and take over (you)r country, reforming its government into a Gamer republic. >The rules are relatively simple: in order to have the right to vote, you are required to "beat" a certain amount of video games each year >This can be accomplished in several different ways: >1) Successfully complete the story mode of singleplayer or cooperative multiplayer games that collectively add up to at least 25 hours of playtime. >2) Win at least 25 matches of competitive multiplayer games >3) Complete at least 2 major raids in an MMO game that are scaled to your character's level >Gachas and other mobile games do not count for ANY of these requirements >Cheating WILL be punished by prison time and community service, most likely as a sanitation worker >Failing to meet the requirements will see your voting privilege stripped from your for at least the following electoral year >As a way to facilitate this process, the government will directly subsidize the production of new and good games in order to give the gaming public new material to sustain their suffrage with. Well Anon, do (you) get to be a citizen?
Good grief. Anonymous 10/13/24(Sun)18:30:22 No.691771054 >>691771205 >Gamers finally rise up and take over (you)r country, reforming its government into a Gamer republic. >The rules are relatively simple: in order to have the right to vote, you are required to "beat" a certain amount of video games each year >This can be accomplished in several different ways: >1) Successfully complete the story mode of singleplayer or cooperative multiplayer games that collectively add up to at least 25 hours of playtime. >2) Win at least 25 matches of competitive multiplayer games >3) Complete at least 2 major raids in an MMO game that are scaled to your character's level >Gachas and other mobile games do not count for ANY of these requirements >Cheating WILL be punished by prison time and community service, most likely as a sanitation worker >Failing to meet the requirements will see your voting privilege stripped from your for at least the following electoral year >As a way to facilitate this process, the government will directly subsidize the production of new and good games in order to give the gaming public new material to sustain their suffrage with. Well Anon, do (you) get to be a citizen?

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Anon on US war drafts | /r/Greentext

King (ID: IrPDS7yW) 78 KB JPG 10/05/24(Sat)20:00:56 No.48387596 >During Vietnam War >1800K men drafted >600K noncompliant >200K charged >8K arrested >3K convicted and imprisoned >0 served full sentence >33% of draftees fled/ignored the draft >only 0.5% faced consequences >government cannot force us into combat >they just scare and bully us
King (ID: IrPDS7yW) 78 KB JPG 10/05/24(Sat)20:00:56 No.48387596 >During Vietnam War >1800K men drafted >600K noncompliant >200K charged >8K arrested >3K convicted and imprisoned >0 served full sentence >33% of draftees fled/ignored the draft >only 0.5% faced consequences >government cannot force us into combat >they just scare and bully us

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Anon likes Denmark | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: cMay3Bz2) 10/13/24( >richer than their neighbours >whiter than their neighbours >high salaries >high gibs for neets >clean streets >good education >good infrastructure Is Denmark the perfect European country?
Anonymous (ID: cMay3Bz2) 10/13/24( >richer than their neighbours >whiter than their neighbours >high salaries >high gibs for neets >clean streets >good education >good infrastructure Is Denmark the perfect European country?

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Anon loves Europe | /r/Greentext

www Anonymous 10/13/24(Sun)21:06:27 No.79113287 aliencel.jpg 359 KB JPG >*thing* is so crazy to me as a european cool nobody cares. go back to r----- little kids with your p--- age of consent laws.
www Anonymous 10/13/24(Sun)21:06:27 No.79113287 aliencel.jpg 359 KB JPG >*thing* is so crazy to me as a european cool nobody cares. go back to r----- little kids with your p--- age of consent laws.

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Suburban Hell | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 10/13/24(Sun)16:46:50 No.79113685 >Go on Plebbit >Go on r/UrbanHell >See pics of beautiful US suburbs What the f--- is this website? 17 KB PNG Anonymous >>79113685 (OP) 10/13/24(Sun)16:48:03 No.79113692 *Millennial bbq guy voice* Do you perchance have some pictures to show us what you mean exactly? Links work as well!
Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 10/13/24(Sun)16:46:50 No.79113685 >Go on Plebbit >Go on r/UrbanHell >See pics of beautiful US suburbs What the f--- is this website? 17 KB PNG Anonymous >>79113685 (OP) 10/13/24(Sun)16:48:03 No.79113692 *Millennial bbq guy voice* Do you perchance have some pictures to show us what you mean exactly? Links work as well!

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Anon has great restraint | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 54 KB JPG 10/13/24(Sun)16:14:13 No.79113368 >have dad >abusive alcoholic >at the best of times he sees me as a benign irritation, at the worst he actively hates me >has attacked me and my brothers and mother on many occasions >whatever, rise above, write him off, doing fine now with a wife and two kids (he's made no effort to connect with his grandkids, I'm fine with this, would prefer it stays that way) >drinking has progressively gotten worse over the years >brother let's me know that the other day dad was attacked by youths while walking his dogs, head kicked in pretty bad and face all f----- up >they recorded it and posted it online for reasons unknown >picked up by local news pages >massive outpouring of sympathy online from strangers, hundreds of comments wishing him well and hoping for a swift recovery and justice for this poor old man (he's only in his mid 50's but his white hair male people think he's much older apparently) >comment after comment on how this nice old man didn't deserve it and the attackers should be ashamed etc., hopes that his grandkids and kids are there for him all that s--- It's taking a herculean effort to not reply to each and every one of these strangers to tell them that it couldn't have happened to a more deserving person and that someone should have done it years ago. Its infuriating knowing that strangers could harbour sympathy for this old c--- after all the s--- that I lived with. My upbringing was far from the worst ever but I still hate that s------- so god damn much. /vent. I know this is a blog post so I'll dutifully kill myself in due course. Thanks anons. View Thread
Anonymous 54 KB JPG 10/13/24(Sun)16:14:13 No.79113368 >have dad >abusive alcoholic >at the best of times he sees me as a benign irritation, at the worst he actively hates me >has attacked me and my brothers and mother on many occasions >whatever, rise above, write him off, doing fine now with a wife and two kids (he's made no effort to connect with his grandkids, I'm fine with this, would prefer it stays that way) >drinking has progressively gotten worse over the years >brother let's me know that the other day dad was attacked by youths while walking his dogs, head kicked in pretty bad and face all f----- up >they recorded it and posted it online for reasons unknown >picked up by local news pages >massive outpouring of sympathy online from strangers, hundreds of comments wishing him well and hoping for a swift recovery and justice for this poor old man (he's only in his mid 50's but his white hair male people think he's much older apparently) >comment after comment on how this nice old man didn't deserve it and the attackers should be ashamed etc., hopes that his grandkids and kids are there for him all that s--- It's taking a herculean effort to not reply to each and every one of these strangers to tell them that it couldn't have happened to a more deserving person and that someone should have done it years ago. Its infuriating knowing that strangers could harbour sympathy for this old c--- after all the s--- that I lived with. My upbringing was far from the worst ever but I still hate that s------- so god damn much. /vent. I know this is a blog post so I'll dutifully kill myself in due course. Thanks anons. View Thread

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Anon summarizes Fallout 4 | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/12/24(Sat) 04:51:54 No.691596375 91f4f831c69d692f1881215f780fb35259d6c16f_hq.jpg 27 KB JPG >I am your son >You will help me kill people and replace them with robots Anonymous Ok 10/12/24(Sat)04:52:25 No.691596427
Anonymous 10/12/24(Sat) 04:51:54 No.691596375 91f4f831c69d692f1881215f780fb35259d6c16f_hq.jpg 27 KB JPG >I am your son >You will help me kill people and replace them with robots Anonymous Ok 10/12/24(Sat)04:52:25 No.691596427

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Anon predicts Joker 2 | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/21/19(Thu)13:53:43 No. 124448519 ► >>124449048 >>124449644 >>124449993 >>124450495>>124451526>>124452674>>124452687 >>124453310 >>124457115 File: CCC 38-Gordon.jpg (45 KB, 640x480) >>124448131 >>124448266 >Why do you think I've been sending every r----- in the city to Arkham, Batman? >Well, let me give you a little hint. In precisely thirty seconds. every cell door in Ward C of the Asylum will open. Ward C is the ward that houses all of those rapists and one special guest. Heh. >Commissioner... are you saying- >Yes, Batman. In fifteen seconds, every r----- in Gotham will have their chance to plunder that damned clown until he's nothing but a sniveling, traumatized wreck Can you imagine, Batman? Hundreds of cocks, and only two holes >James you can still stop this >Oh, not anymore. Batman. The doors are open. But you don't have to worry. After this, the Joker won't be able to hurt anybody ever again. And only at the cost of freeing every man who blows his steamy load into the clown's ass >What!? James you aren't serious! You can't free all those men- >I had to give them an incentive. Batman Otherwise they would have just r---- each-other-as tantalizing as that pasty white ass might be on it's own, without the promise of freedom. >But worry not, old friend. Recapturing escaped prisoners from Arkham "is" what you're best at. Hah! Now, if you'll excuse me, I want to catch the live feed from the cameras in the ward. I have a bottle of vintage champagne I've been saving for the occasion
Anonymous 11/21/19(Thu)13:53:43 No. 124448519 ► >>124449048 >>124449644 >>124449993 >>124450495>>124451526>>124452674>>124452687 >>124453310 >>124457115 File: CCC 38-Gordon.jpg (45 KB, 640x480) >>124448131 >>124448266 >Why do you think I've been sending every r----- in the city to Arkham, Batman? >Well, let me give you a little hint. In precisely thirty seconds. every cell door in Ward C of the Asylum will open. Ward C is the ward that houses all of those rapists and one special guest. Heh. >Commissioner... are you saying- >Yes, Batman. In fifteen seconds, every r----- in Gotham will have their chance to plunder that damned clown until he's nothing but a sniveling, traumatized wreck Can you imagine, Batman? Hundreds of cocks, and only two holes >James you can still stop this >Oh, not anymore. Batman. The doors are open. But you don't have to worry. After this, the Joker won't be able to hurt anybody ever again. And only at the cost of freeing every man who blows his steamy load into the clown's ass >What!? James you aren't serious! You can't free all those men- >I had to give them an incentive. Batman Otherwise they would have just r---- each-other-as tantalizing as that pasty white ass might be on it's own, without the promise of freedom. >But worry not, old friend. Recapturing escaped prisoners from Arkham "is" what you're best at. Hah! Now, if you'll excuse me, I want to catch the live feed from the cameras in the ward. I have a bottle of vintage champagne I've been saving for the occasion

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anon discovers what 4chan is really like | /r/Greentext

File: what the f--- guys.jpg (21 KB, 500x441) what the f--- guys? Anonymous 10/13/24(Sun)00:32:22 No.925865457 >>925865513 >have scrolled /pol/ before but never /b/ >follow greentext reposter on twitter >"maybe i'll try scrolling /b/, this looks pretty funny" >it's just p--- > literally nothing except you f------ retards spamming p--- all day >"okay fine whatever, i've never posted a thread or reply ever before so maybe i'll try making my own greentext" >open the link to make a thread >type out a story, took me no more than 5 minutes >go to do the captcha and it glitches out >"please wait a while before posting a thread!" >i've never posted a thread or reply before, what do you mean wait a while? >okay whatever i'll wait >do captcha >fail captcha because i'm retarded and it was confusing >it deletes the f------ post that i typed out >fine i'll try again >png file i used was corrupted >it deletes the f------ post again >okay i'll download the image as a jpg instead >this is my third attempt and it probably won't work either what the f--- is wrong with you people? how do you retards actually post a thread daily, let alone multiple times a day? are you degenerates actually paying for this f------ website or am i missing something?
File: what the f--- guys.jpg (21 KB, 500x441) what the f--- guys? Anonymous 10/13/24(Sun)00:32:22 No.925865457 >>925865513 >have scrolled /pol/ before but never /b/ >follow greentext reposter on twitter >"maybe i'll try scrolling /b/, this looks pretty funny" >it's just p--- > literally nothing except you f------ retards spamming p--- all day >"okay fine whatever, i've never posted a thread or reply ever before so maybe i'll try making my own greentext" >open the link to make a thread >type out a story, took me no more than 5 minutes >go to do the captcha and it glitches out >"please wait a while before posting a thread!" >i've never posted a thread or reply before, what do you mean wait a while? >okay whatever i'll wait >do captcha >fail captcha because i'm retarded and it was confusing >it deletes the f------ post that i typed out >fine i'll try again >png file i used was corrupted >it deletes the f------ post again >okay i'll download the image as a jpg instead >this is my third attempt and it probably won't work either what the f--- is wrong with you people? how do you retards actually post a thread daily, let alone multiple times a day? are you degenerates actually paying for this f------ website or am i missing something?

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Where elves roam | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 87 KB JPG archery 10/13/24(Sun)21:02:55 No.79112163 >went to a ren faire >in costume even >got one compliment, besides that no one talked to me >suprised myself with my dexterity, I hit the center in a darts throwing game, hit the bell in the strength hammer game, and hit a balloon in >extremely overpriced mediocre food
Anonymous 87 KB JPG archery 10/13/24(Sun)21:02:55 No.79112163 >went to a ren faire >in costume even >got one compliment, besides that no one talked to me >suprised myself with my dexterity, I hit the center in a darts throwing game, hit the bell in the strength hammer game, and hit a balloon in >extremely overpriced mediocre food

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From the shadows | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 15 KB JPG not my spirit." 10/13/24(Sun)20:09:33 No.39030694 >Take DMT >Experience blast-off for the first time >Encounter some f------ living thing made out of shapes >It telepathically tells me "You look freaked out." >I tell it "My mind's freaked out but >It responds with "Well guess what? Poop." >I remember just saying "The f---?" >The thing says "Now you're confused!" >Thing laughs and disappears What the f---, is this really what all those "psychonauts" are on about?
Anonymous 15 KB JPG not my spirit." 10/13/24(Sun)20:09:33 No.39030694 >Take DMT >Experience blast-off for the first time >Encounter some f------ living thing made out of shapes >It telepathically tells me "You look freaked out." >I tell it "My mind's freaked out but >It responds with "Well guess what? Poop." >I remember just saying "The f---?" >The thing says "Now you're confused!" >Thing laughs and disappears What the f---, is this really what all those "psychonauts" are on about?

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Panic at the mall | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 459 KB PNG 10/13/24(Sun)06:06:04 No.39027408 What ever happened with the Miami Mall incident? >New Year's 2024 >Bayside Marketplace mall in Miami >Mass panic over alleged sighting of 8 foot tall "shadow aliens" >Literally ~50 police cars show up and surround the mall >Videos of the massive police presence outside all over tiktok >Police claim the actual cause of the disturbance was 50 teens setting off fireworks and causing a riot >No footage of this >No cell footage >No mall security footage >No bodycam footage >Swiftly memory holed What happened?
: Anonymous 459 KB PNG 10/13/24(Sun)06:06:04 No.39027408 What ever happened with the Miami Mall incident? >New Year's 2024 >Bayside Marketplace mall in Miami >Mass panic over alleged sighting of 8 foot tall "shadow aliens" >Literally ~50 police cars show up and surround the mall >Videos of the massive police presence outside all over tiktok >Police claim the actual cause of the disturbance was 50 teens setting off fireworks and causing a riot >No footage of this >No cell footage >No mall security footage >No bodycam footage >Swiftly memory holed What happened?

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I've been collecting the weight of birds | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 183 KB JPG 10/13/24(Sun)21:29:53 No.79112447 >be me two years ago >start muh self improvement, more exercise, less junk food, less fapping, touching the famous grass etc >even try therapy >by talking to the therapist for 6 months on and off I come to a terrible realization >I don't actually regret anything >I say I want a cute gf but I never made any efforts towards women >I say I want to make money but I never made any efforts towards a career >I say I want a social circle but I never stayed in touch with anyone >all I ever wanted to do was play games and watch anime >all I ever did was play games and watch anime >mfw sitting in a small apartment in front of a screen is truly who I am >mfw I lived true to myself >go home and see Factorio 2.0 is coming
: Anonymous 183 KB JPG 10/13/24(Sun)21:29:53 No.79112447 >be me two years ago >start muh self improvement, more exercise, less junk food, less fapping, touching the famous grass etc >even try therapy >by talking to the therapist for 6 months on and off I come to a terrible realization >I don't actually regret anything >I say I want a cute gf but I never made any efforts towards women >I say I want to make money but I never made any efforts towards a career >I say I want a social circle but I never stayed in touch with anyone >all I ever wanted to do was play games and watch anime >all I ever did was play games and watch anime >mfw sitting in a small apartment in front of a screen is truly who I am >mfw I lived true to myself >go home and see Factorio 2.0 is coming

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Anon is cursed | /r/Greentext

2:4 >be me >early 20s >not ugly >not dirt poor >not fat or too skinny >no demanding to people >helpful and resourceful >haven't had not a single romantic relationship meanwhile >be my cousin >early 30s >cerebral palsy, wheelchair bound >no job, on welfare >face like an inmate >psychotic, but sociable >managed to have several girlfriends >one somehow got pregnant once, but they did an abortion I used to be an atheist. Now I believe in supernatural because the only thing that would make this have any sense is curse.
2:4 >be me >early 20s >not ugly >not dirt poor >not fat or too skinny >no demanding to people >helpful and resourceful >haven't had not a single romantic relationship meanwhile >be my cousin >early 30s >cerebral palsy, wheelchair bound >no job, on welfare >face like an inmate >psychotic, but sociable >managed to have several girlfriends >one somehow got pregnant once, but they did an abortion I used to be an atheist. Now I believe in supernatural because the only thing that would make this have any sense is curse.

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Why not cancel the date Anon, you fucking cuck | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous NEVER GOON 10/13/24(Sun)09:16:43 No.79105709 >going on a date with a girl tomorrow >she mentions taking a nap at her friend's house >her friend's a guy Bros.... 126 KB JPG 19 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous NEVER GOON 10/13/24(Sun)09:16:43 No.79105709 >going on a date with a girl tomorrow >she mentions taking a nap at her friend's house >her friend's a guy Bros.... 126 KB JPG 19 Replies View Thread

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Aliens vs theoretical physics | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/05/24(Sat)20:40:54 No.204191382 00 1667876499665.jpg 76 KB JPG >this took over earth in 7 hours, has the entirety of humanity under its heels, and has conquered numerous other worlds and galaxy's >gets beaten by a nerd with a crowbar and like a couple dozen bulgarian dudes with beanies and shotguns how??? the combine is set up to be this great technological unstoppable threat and it gets beaten so damn easily
: Anonymous 10/05/24(Sat)20:40:54 No.204191382 00 1667876499665.jpg 76 KB JPG >this took over earth in 7 hours, has the entirety of humanity under its heels, and has conquered numerous other worlds and galaxy's >gets beaten by a nerd with a crowbar and like a couple dozen bulgarian dudes with beanies and shotguns how??? the combine is set up to be this great technological unstoppable threat and it gets beaten so damn easily

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