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Ancient Rome

Anonymous (ID: JrYOpO4M) 08/26/13(Mon)19:07:25 22502359445 ITT: Rome stories >Be me >sentorial class, but kinda plebish >decide to go to forum to pick up puellae >see a IX/X puella >ohjupiterthatbottom.marblestatue >go up to her Sheard pick up line from my buddy cassius, try it out hey girl are you parthian? no S"because you shot an arrow into my heart" looks at me like marius would look at sulla >"my pater familiae died in that battle" >my face goes redder than the theater of pompey >she walks away >go home and f--- my boy slave >i miss cato on the ides of march
Anonymous (ID: JrYOpO4M) 08/26/13(Mon)19:07:25 22502359445 ITT: Rome stories >Be me >sentorial class, but kinda plebish >decide to go to forum to pick up puellae >see a IX/X puella >ohjupiterthatbottom.marblestatue >go up to her Sheard pick up line from my buddy cassius, try it out hey girl are you parthian? no S"because you shot an arrow into my heart" looks at me like marius would look at sulla >"my pater familiae died in that battle" >my face goes redder than the theater of pompey >she walks away >go home and f--- my boy slave >i miss cato on the ides of march

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rome senator puellae pleb

IF YOU DON'T JIGGLE, YOU GET THE DICKLE

Anonymous (D: ElipGYmK) 02/23/13(Sat)00:24:52 No.460629401 Replies: 2460634408 File: 1361597092706.ong-(63 KB, 273x343, yeees.png) 9 >be at bar, having a few beers >soon >closing hours sonly one guy left in the bar aside from me >guy goes to bathroom >my moment of greatness has come >enter bathroom >guy is about to take a piss >l pull down my pants (and underpants) >guy hasn't noticed yet >l start dancing, shaking my hips wildly, tongue out of my mouth >guy suddenly sees me >"the f--- your doing you f------ weirdo!?" >the helicopter >he's trapped, still pissing and he's all mine >come jiggle with me* I says >guy is trying to piss faster, he wants to escape >"Jiggly! Do the jiggle!" scream as I run towards him, d--- flailing wildly >the horror on his face >l kick his legs away under him, he falls on his ass, piss everywhere >the climax >I swing my d--- in a precision move, moving my hips to get that extra momentum >it hits him in the face, also on the lips "if you don't jiggle then vou get the dickle!" I scream at the top of my lungs >l pull up my pants and run out the bar
Anonymous (D: ElipGYmK) 02/23/13(Sat)00:24:52 No.460629401 Replies: 2460634408 File: 1361597092706.ong-(63 KB, 273x343, yeees.png) 9 >be at bar, having a few beers >soon >closing hours sonly one guy left in the bar aside from me >guy goes to bathroom >my moment of greatness has come >enter bathroom >guy is about to take a piss >l pull down my pants (and underpants) >guy hasn't noticed yet >l start dancing, shaking my hips wildly, tongue out of my mouth >guy suddenly sees me >"the f--- your doing you f------ weirdo!?" >the helicopter >he's trapped, still pissing and he's all mine >come jiggle with me* I says >guy is trying to piss faster, he wants to escape >"Jiggly! Do the jiggle!" scream as I run towards him, d--- flailing wildly >the horror on his face >l kick his legs away under him, he falls on his ass, piss everywhere >the climax >I swing my d--- in a precision move, moving my hips to get that extra momentum >it hits him in the face, also on the lips "if you don't jiggle then vou get the dickle!" I scream at the top of my lungs >l pull up my pants and run out the bar

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4chan green text stories /b/ jiggle dickle robbie rotten

Saddest Greentext Story I've Ever Seen

Anonymous (ID: Xa08op0c) 01/19/13(Sat)23:50:04 No.452312165 So it's Saturday evening and you're on/b/ (unless you're in a time zone where that isn't the case). You probably have a lot of anger and sadness towards the world Maybe this story will validate your anger and sadness, maybe it'll make you feel like you shouldn't be as angry and sad, all I know is that it's the story of the worst thing that's ever It starts about five years ago >my step mother is a c--- uge c--- >she's a christian scientist and an awful woman who's borderline abusive and hates everyone in the family >she justifies her being a c--- with "you kids think im the evil stepmother anyways, so i might as well be >I used to feel bad for hating her, because I just wanted my dad to be happy do not feel this way any longer >about five years ago, I was a senior in high school >a new girl moved in, her name was Nicole Nicole was a misfit from the start, she was socially inept, dressed weird, and kept to herself >whenever she tried to reach out and make friends she just seemed mean or scary >l knew straight off the bat that we'd get along perfectly >one day I came up to her after class and referred to some joke she made in class >she thought i was making fun of her and started trying to apologize for the joke told her it was hilarious ong story short, she didn't have any friends and she wanted friends, and I wanted to be her friend and we were fast friends by the end of senior year we lost our virginity to e we went to college in the same city >as college moved on, our relationship just kept getting stronger we got an apartment together we talked about post-college plans it became apparent that as things were going, we might get married are >Nicole started to get sick one day she found a lump in her breast >Nicole had breast cancer they took her into the hospital, and in some f------ awful twist of events, in addition to breast cancer, she had brain cancer the doctor said that since they found out early enough, they might be able to do some help, but it was a dangerous situation each day we spent together felt so important were inseparable d my dad to tell him was devastated about everything >Nicole starts contemplating suicide as she starts rapidly losing weight and hair stick by her side throughout the whole ordeal >got another job to help pay for the hospital bills realize that i'm running out of potential time to ask her to marry me decide that i should ask her to so that she can have that before it's too late >call my >let him know my intentions, and let him know that if he wants to come he's welcome, but that my step mother is not >the next day, Nicole and I come home from the hospital and who is waiting outside our building but my goddamn step mother > Robert, I think we need to talk about what you told your father "Robert, you cannot marry Nicole, for one thing she's going to die, and for another thing, she's choosing medicine over prayer which is against our family's religion." my whole body goes cold with rage >l had not proposed to Nicole yet >she found out by hearing my stepmother say i was forbidden from it and that Nicole was going to die without thinking I punched my stepmother in the face and she fell to the ground walked Nicole into our buildina without lookina back elping Nicole one day the hospital says they're having trouble with my card insufficient funds >that's impossible, there's thousands of dollars on this account on has been withdrawn >my father set the account up with me when i was going into college, he set up my original account when i was a sophomore in high school si realize that he had the authority to do this >let him know that I am coming for the money and if I don't get it, i will call the cops and report theft >he tells me that he has the rights to call the police and report my assault on my stepmother >oh jesus f------ christ Stell him Tm coming over and we can discuss in person yelled at him for four hours and got my money back went to the bank the next day to set up a new account that he had nothing to do with take care of hospital bills now that the whole marriage thing is out in the open, i discuss it with Nicole she really wants to get married before she dies it's beconing more and more probable that she will not make it very long ment ring take her out to this old field we used to hang out in during high school where we had all sorts of memories, it was this huge foresty area under the stars off the main road holding her after that was the most beautiful moment of my life had cut off all contact with my father and stepmother see >Nicole started acting much happier >she said how important it was to her that now, if she was going to die, she'd be dying happy and she'd be dying with me >it hurt me so much to have to think about it, but knowing she was accepting this horrible inevitable outcome was good >We have a low-key wedding with only friends and Nicole's family, and everyone tells me how great it is that I'm doing this for her >explain that I'm not doing it for her because of the cancer, that i just wasnt letting it get in the way of what i always wanted to do anyway >Nicole is happier than I'd ever seen her sit was easily the best day of my life >about two weeks into our marriage Nicole's health starts getting worse and worse swe start going to the hospital far more frequently the doctor estimates she has about a month to live >hearing those words was one of the most horrifying moments of my life up until that point, there was no set-in-stone sort of outcome there was always an admittedly distant hope of things turning out okay smy hopes were crushed dropped my courses for the semester and set it up so that i'd finish in the fall of the next year spend every day with Nicole we are so in love that it physically hurts to think about her dying >she'd been holding up fine, but now she was starting to get afraid > you need to be with me when i die, i dont want to be alone when i die" >she keeps making me promise ill be there three weeks after she gets the "one month" warning >we're in our apartment together just holding each other and listening to music on si am being arrested for assaulting my stepmother in over sas i get taken away, Nicole is just screaming "Don't leave mel" sthe next day I'm let out as my father and step mother dropped the charges >my dad picks me up to say that he hopes i leamt a lesson stell him i need to go home >he drives me to his and step mom's house for me to apologize >he keeps me there for two hours because my stepmother doesn't believe Im sorry when i say so (i am clearly not sorry) smy car and cell phone are at the apartment >eventually he says this isn't over" and takes me home knock on the door oh s--- no no no no no come in >she had texted me "come home" about thirty times, my phone was off and in the other room This happened last year. Ive been contemplating suicide ever since I haven't spoken to my father since this. The reason it just came up is because last week he called and said he got diagnosed with prostate cancer and had two months to live and wanted to patch things up before it's too late. I'm having a lot of trouble figuring out whether or not to, but he never accepted any guilt, nor did my stepmother, and they're still married, so Im pretty much planning on letting him die knowing I want nothing to do with him.
Anonymous (ID: Xa08op0c) 01/19/13(Sat)23:50:04 No.452312165 So it's Saturday evening and you're on/b/ (unless you're in a time zone where that isn't the case). You probably have a lot of anger and sadness towards the world Maybe this story will validate your anger and sadness, maybe it'll make you feel like you shouldn't be as angry and sad, all I know is that it's the story of the worst thing that's ever It starts about five years ago >my step mother is a c--- uge c--- >she's a christian scientist and an awful woman who's borderline abusive and hates everyone in the family >she justifies her being a c--- with "you kids think im the evil stepmother anyways, so i might as well be >I used to feel bad for hating her, because I just wanted my dad to be happy do not feel this way any longer >about five years ago, I was a senior in high school >a new girl moved in, her name was Nicole Nicole was a misfit from the start, she was socially inept, dressed weird, and kept to herself >whenever she tried to reach out and make friends she just seemed mean or scary >l knew straight off the bat that we'd get along perfectly >one day I came up to her after class and referred to some joke she made in class >she thought i was making fun of her and started trying to apologize for the joke told her it was hilarious ong story short, she didn't have any friends and she wanted friends, and I wanted to be her friend and we were fast friends by the end of senior year we lost our virginity to e we went to college in the same city >as college moved on, our relationship just kept getting stronger we got an apartment together we talked about post-college plans it became apparent that as things were going, we might get married are >Nicole started to get sick one day she found a lump in her breast >Nicole had breast cancer they took her into the hospital, and in some f------ awful twist of events, in addition to breast cancer, she had brain cancer the doctor said that since they found out early enough, they might be able to do some help, but it was a dangerous situation each day we spent together felt so important were inseparable d my dad to tell him was devastated about everything >Nicole starts contemplating suicide as she starts rapidly losing weight and hair stick by her side throughout the whole ordeal >got another job to help pay for the hospital bills realize that i'm running out of potential time to ask her to marry me decide that i should ask her to so that she can have that before it's too late >call my >let him know my intentions, and let him know that if he wants to come he's welcome, but that my step mother is not >the next day, Nicole and I come home from the hospital and who is waiting outside our building but my goddamn step mother > Robert, I think we need to talk about what you told your father "Robert, you cannot marry Nicole, for one thing she's going to die, and for another thing, she's choosing medicine over prayer which is against our family's religion." my whole body goes cold with rage >l had not proposed to Nicole yet >she found out by hearing my stepmother say i was forbidden from it and that Nicole was going to die without thinking I punched my stepmother in the face and she fell to the ground walked Nicole into our buildina without lookina back elping Nicole one day the hospital says they're having trouble with my card insufficient funds >that's impossible, there's thousands of dollars on this account on has been withdrawn >my father set the account up with me when i was going into college, he set up my original account when i was a sophomore in high school si realize that he had the authority to do this >let him know that I am coming for the money and if I don't get it, i will call the cops and report theft >he tells me that he has the rights to call the police and report my assault on my stepmother >oh jesus f------ christ Stell him Tm coming over and we can discuss in person yelled at him for four hours and got my money back went to the bank the next day to set up a new account that he had nothing to do with take care of hospital bills now that the whole marriage thing is out in the open, i discuss it with Nicole she really wants to get married before she dies it's beconing more and more probable that she will not make it very long ment ring take her out to this old field we used to hang out in during high school where we had all sorts of memories, it was this huge foresty area under the stars off the main road holding her after that was the most beautiful moment of my life had cut off all contact with my father and stepmother see >Nicole started acting much happier >she said how important it was to her that now, if she was going to die, she'd be dying happy and she'd be dying with me >it hurt me so much to have to think about it, but knowing she was accepting this horrible inevitable outcome was good >We have a low-key wedding with only friends and Nicole's family, and everyone tells me how great it is that I'm doing this for her >explain that I'm not doing it for her because of the cancer, that i just wasnt letting it get in the way of what i always wanted to do anyway >Nicole is happier than I'd ever seen her sit was easily the best day of my life >about two weeks into our marriage Nicole's health starts getting worse and worse swe start going to the hospital far more frequently the doctor estimates she has about a month to live >hearing those words was one of the most horrifying moments of my life up until that point, there was no set-in-stone sort of outcome there was always an admittedly distant hope of things turning out okay smy hopes were crushed dropped my courses for the semester and set it up so that i'd finish in the fall of the next year spend every day with Nicole we are so in love that it physically hurts to think about her dying >she'd been holding up fine, but now she was starting to get afraid > you need to be with me when i die, i dont want to be alone when i die" >she keeps making me promise ill be there three weeks after she gets the "one month" warning >we're in our apartment together just holding each other and listening to music on si am being arrested for assaulting my stepmother in over sas i get taken away, Nicole is just screaming "Don't leave mel" sthe next day I'm let out as my father and step mother dropped the charges >my dad picks me up to say that he hopes i leamt a lesson stell him i need to go home >he drives me to his and step mom's house for me to apologize >he keeps me there for two hours because my stepmother doesn't believe Im sorry when i say so (i am clearly not sorry) smy car and cell phone are at the apartment >eventually he says this isn't over" and takes me home knock on the door oh s--- no no no no no come in >she had texted me "come home" about thirty times, my phone was off and in the other room This happened last year. Ive been contemplating suicide ever since I haven't spoken to my father since this. The reason it just came up is because last week he called and said he got diagnosed with prostate cancer and had two months to live and wanted to patch things up before it's too late. I'm having a lot of trouble figuring out whether or not to, but he never accepted any guilt, nor did my stepmother, and they're still married, so Im pretty much planning on letting him die knowing I want nothing to do with him.

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Family Christmas


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greentext christmas

didn't see that coming

Anonymous 07/08/15(Wed)10:38:16 No.626631938626632289626632393 626632885 >Mom died right when I was born >Grew up with my dad's family, because my dad has all sorts of emotional issues and he bailed before i was born >Growing up I feel like there was always a lot of distance between me and my sister >Be 17 or 18 Notice that my sister is a hottie >Accidentally found a video that she made of herself >l thought she was so f------ beautiful that I watched it twice >Would have watched it a lot more, but crazy >At this point, totally lusting after my sister >She was also having bad trouble with the law >Actually in custody when I left home >Friend and I go to pick her up s--- went down and I had to leave home Just wanted to f--- her brains out >l think she had feelings for me too >Kissed me when we picked her up >Definitely WAS NOT a sisterly kiss >Friend told me he wants to get with my sister jealous.jpg >Not much >At this point, we were all wanted and moving around a lot >Serious sexual tension between my friend and sister >l get hurt badly and almost die >While in recover, sister gives me another not sisterly kiss >W happened between me and my sister for a while e spend some time apart >l get really religious, try not to think of her that way I was totally over her >We go >She's in the hottest f------ bikini ever >All those feelings come back >She ends up with my friend from before After all this, we were at a party >Sister and I were outside alone >Kill the mood by telling her that Darth Vader is our father and I have to go face him sailing a year later (nothing romantic)
Anonymous 07/08/15(Wed)10:38:16 No.626631938626632289626632393 626632885 >Mom died right when I was born >Grew up with my dad's family, because my dad has all sorts of emotional issues and he bailed before i was born >Growing up I feel like there was always a lot of distance between me and my sister >Be 17 or 18 Notice that my sister is a hottie >Accidentally found a video that she made of herself >l thought she was so f------ beautiful that I watched it twice >Would have watched it a lot more, but crazy >At this point, totally lusting after my sister >She was also having bad trouble with the law >Actually in custody when I left home >Friend and I go to pick her up s--- went down and I had to leave home Just wanted to f--- her brains out >l think she had feelings for me too >Kissed me when we picked her up >Definitely WAS NOT a sisterly kiss >Friend told me he wants to get with my sister jealous.jpg >Not much >At this point, we were all wanted and moving around a lot >Serious sexual tension between my friend and sister >l get hurt badly and almost die >While in recover, sister gives me another not sisterly kiss >W happened between me and my sister for a while e spend some time apart >l get really religious, try not to think of her that way I was totally over her >We go >She's in the hottest f------ bikini ever >All those feelings come back >She ends up with my friend from before After all this, we were at a party >Sister and I were outside alone >Kill the mood by telling her that Darth Vader is our father and I have to go face him sailing a year later (nothing romantic)

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Eight-Beers Mgee the Irish Bastard

Dude ded recently and here懑the balad of the mtevee us bsstard whenl wss younger, l had this hish hend who pred our school when l was ike 17 -be Some foreign guy has just joined, is family ust moved her -kved here with hrs dad nd h盻ltte soler, his mmded when he was younger as f--- 17 year old Britbong city called Derry in He gets put in mmy class and ends up siting next to me Call him a hippo because of his f------ industrial size front feeth and his big f------ ips s annoying EB with sht ke Do you Dude is OCD as f--- with his pencilcase and sht Goes nuts if anything gets moved, so his desk is sightly apart from everyone elses >We all get in sh foe tuck wth him on purpose 'We ought to know beter" The sdistic hippo keeps trying to get a reaction out of EB the whole class All of a sudden EB just casualy raises a foot and pushes the Hippo's desk right the f--- over fatass off the ground through nothing but sheer autstic resentment Teacher huries over and is trying to eplain to EB about Oreg's autism whie Greg freaks the f--- out in his chir, breathing heavily as though e's trying to ift EB looks at Greg and tells the teacher "Ch sory, we don't have auism in Ireland Wi bump with more Anonymous OD wH7H0gC) 03/19/1 4Med120 13 4B UTCS № 538038190 Riplin 2242m h on EB's third day at our school He's a pretty cool guy lkes the same vidya and movies as me and is a big fan of Rugby, was captain of his team back in reland eE hrm the school has rugby team, he芳ys he'd ike tojon EB goes to check it out, starts off on the lower team because he's new Lower team conaists of fat f---- who think theyre shronk and a couple of kind of fast runners that next half The'l take ham Thomas postions himselt opposte EB urips on hin·grabs him byte neck to pul hm drwn and iterally rols on him like a ticking roling pin -EB didnt even have the bal What the f--- you playin at son I didnt even have the bal, do you even know how to fookin play the game lad EB grins You know over in Ireland you have to be fit to play sports, the faties get leit on the sideline EB grabs his amn and tosses him to the ground, dude twists his anke or something and starts twitching and squeaking ike a baby elephant with parkinsons EB gets put on top team Anonymous (D wHTiHO) 031914(Wed)20 28 25 UTC-5 No 538041 137 Repbes-altm months without inc Most people don't give him s--- anymore, mostly because he's just a rice guy as long as youre cool to him -No rodents aside from ǎfew close cals with Greg the Midy Autistc Hppo Apparently in Ireland they don't have gangs, they have paramiltaries fighting between whether Northen Ireland is British or Ih >He plays ㅕ down sit bd ican lell some s--- must havo happened because he always changes the subject when it gets close to home Edgy fapgot Luke comes back to school Luke hangs around with a pack of n------ who are al apparenty in a gang, he lkes to pretend he's part of this "gang and caries this f------ Stankey knie around that he painted red and blue for some reason One day at lunch Luke comes up to EB and out of nowhere stats asking fhis dad is alcohoic TopE Weveryore rto everyone to Nope aound Well tuck Ird wanna siff sptI had to sht out a daft bastardlke yourset. Jog on "You wirt totuck with the wrong person today Irish boy? EB starts laughing, lHeraly loses his sht at the ste of this Itie fagpot in a trenchcoat with a stanley knfe and actualy presses Ee gabs tes wnst, takes the tabled tlade from the hands of the chosen one, tosses t wer a fence and punches hrm straight nthe face We're out geting beer, Im with a 7/10 GT that Ive had a crush on for tucking months Her and EB get along realy wel, athough I sort of think she only hung out with us because EB did That right when we're all drunk me and QT end up f------ Leaving out my side because this is the ballad of Eight Beer, not me Spend ages taiking with QT, establish that she apparenty realy lkes me back Bro bonding beer EB heads up to bed, I stay down with the other guys to watch TV, OT was asleep when I came down About an hour later hear some noise and a scream from upstairs QT comes nunning dow with a towel round her, soaking wet, and runs out the front door Apparently EB sleeps naked, not surprised since I've found him naked before after a night of drinking ンsays she carne on to him even ater ali s--- she sat laughs and says hetook aprt to bed wth hm, it was tnthe table and when she ied onwth him hetossed 1 idioer her Threw her clothes out the window into the rain and told her to go and fetch Two weeks later he takes me to a pub and hooks me up with a 90 Anonymous 0D wHTH00句03.191 4(Wed 20 43:59 UTC-5 No 5380440 14 Rapaas-upum mamum wa 2242|ap -EB·nd rme are, total bros after berg frendsforafew years Having him as a best friend is like having those flashy trainers as a kid S--- :Hm and E汨were close, mostly because EB would buy him vidya and act super interested in the anme sht he lied because nobody elseother than me would loses has har er chemo aGotovst hin, EB is gong me 8礇there >He thinks rs awesome get our photo taken together wthout any har -EB lets him draw al kinds of dumb sht on his bad head, lets hm draw a dumb moustache on him l0 -Spend ages just dicking a >Son of a bitch luke who R is, Dukey the Rookle is across the bar in the same tucking trenchcoat he wore back at school :EB says hi, ch 右away to him ike noting ever happened >We head home and EB spend the night sitting up with me playing Batlefrant on my old PS2 and drinking, just trying to cheer me up me every time Sorry for that 2sad4me post, but iti make sense later Anonymous (ID woooec) 05/19/14(Wed20 5246 UTC-5 No 530045357 Reeses 쯔53awawmeesaaa Living together in a flst with some chick and her boyfriend The one song I remember isude Tomm by The Runyacks because it played when s--- went down -EB toldtem that he "an't bokn凱ytrouble lads, have beer and forget that trpeforthe night ye?" 4 of them jump on him, start beating the s--- out of him l tackle one of them to try help him, get the f--- beaten out of me but f--- that if's goddamn E8 in there EB broke the dudes He gets up, bleeding out of every pore in his beauoful irish body Bouncing around with his fists up, Iterally looks ike he could fly around the room he's bouncing that much The skinheads keep going for him but back off every time aher he swings, it looks lke he could knock a building down with that shi Babbing some incoherent sht in Irish rage, nobody understands the words but everyone understands the meaning pack up there sht n full swing theoughoud, lke a scene from a f------ movie Eight tucking beersl You splied eight of me f------ beers you hairless tuckin mongrels Dude is shouting ater the guys who jumped hm Eight beers lad, eight f------ beers What's the f------ craic there lke EB is going back to Ireland to vist his nan, she's real sick We land in Belfast I think thats the capital of the north but not of Ireland, idk how t worked EB never realy explained t, sad you won't understand the builshit poltics unless you grew up there sweetest tuckng old lady ever, says that E was always a rough lad but wk he'd never hurt a sour go 1o vist his nan with EB' greedy f----- This woman is clearly the most influenial family member in the Eight Beer famly EB shows me round Derry, tells me about how if's split religously and shows me this big ass wall Takes me to Befast agan and shows me the place where the ttanic was but -we end up gong to -Get pretty aurk.or place caled The Crown Bar per as EB calls it Walked around Belfast for a bt, he tels me about the history of some stut -Spend a few nights there, have a f------ blast but decide to head home, don't wanna be an inrusion on the whole nan stuation Plaus racbcally a part of Getting close to the end now. Shts hard to wnte, I miss hat f----- Anonymous (0D wH7HOC) 03/114(Wed1 18 48 UTC-5 No 538040230 "Apparently sme Kdoy Fidder caled Wiharm Wr寸 f----- EB when he wB5 8 kid caught agan night there nearly gets violent when -EB's sister gets beter, but is pretty f----- for ife Never talks, never leaves the house, she's pretty much a goddamn vegetable -EB spends aa of tvs trme oet work with her, rever come弓out arrymore, Not sts r, wth her we sormetmes com e round and drnk wth hrm bu -One nighe while he's sieeping, EB's f----- up sister OO's hve refuses to le ven, house note a55ung EBtht t's not tvs faut, ter's pretty muchth, meen su ct of过'don prt why she'd need to 5ay thot but㎡atever wH7HOQC) EB doesn't realy He doesn't want to go home because he has nothing there other than reminders, but doesntwn .He gets in 갠 few fights when we're out dming anyone who gves hm any 5ht gets mmediately f------ amidated nor e of th s ads everyone chl『 # that he used to do night he's dunk as Dude is fighting back tears >1 had t already guessed, but he starts teling me atout how he blames himseffor what happened to his sis have f------ known better this is his tail uterally canor change hs mind on this s---, looks like he has himse#1uly convincedth Pulls himsetr together We tak about old smes, laugh a bit things actuaily seem back so normal for a whle Ainight mabe. Let's have one for old time's sake, ae? a good hour He eventualy leaves, but before he goes he tells me that "You've been a good mate from day one mate. Honestly out on a limb rd do f----- anything for ya Take t easy lad He doesnt show up to work the next day EB doesn't reply to texts or answer place doeant answer is famly tatoo barmed hm5ef for not ㎞owng to protect hes 5ster and that he was too m serable to keep 5ht up I don't need thanked stopped grave every tme f-----
Dude ded recently and here懑the balad of the mtevee us bsstard whenl wss younger, l had this hish hend who pred our school when l was ike 17 -be Some foreign guy has just joined, is family ust moved her -kved here with hrs dad nd h盻ltte soler, his mmded when he was younger as f--- 17 year old Britbong city called Derry in He gets put in mmy class and ends up siting next to me Call him a hippo because of his f------ industrial size front feeth and his big f------ ips s annoying EB with sht ke Do you Dude is OCD as f--- with his pencilcase and sht Goes nuts if anything gets moved, so his desk is sightly apart from everyone elses >We all get in sh foe tuck wth him on purpose 'We ought to know beter" The sdistic hippo keeps trying to get a reaction out of EB the whole class All of a sudden EB just casualy raises a foot and pushes the Hippo's desk right the f--- over fatass off the ground through nothing but sheer autstic resentment Teacher huries over and is trying to eplain to EB about Oreg's autism whie Greg freaks the f--- out in his chir, breathing heavily as though e's trying to ift EB looks at Greg and tells the teacher "Ch sory, we don't have auism in Ireland Wi bump with more Anonymous OD wH7H0gC) 03/19/1 4Med120 13 4B UTCS № 538038190 Riplin 2242m h on EB's third day at our school He's a pretty cool guy lkes the same vidya and movies as me and is a big fan of Rugby, was captain of his team back in reland eE hrm the school has rugby team, he芳ys he'd ike tojon EB goes to check it out, starts off on the lower team because he's new Lower team conaists of fat f---- who think theyre shronk and a couple of kind of fast runners that next half The'l take ham Thomas postions himselt opposte EB urips on hin·grabs him byte neck to pul hm drwn and iterally rols on him like a ticking roling pin -EB didnt even have the bal What the f--- you playin at son I didnt even have the bal, do you even know how to fookin play the game lad EB grins You know over in Ireland you have to be fit to play sports, the faties get leit on the sideline EB grabs his amn and tosses him to the ground, dude twists his anke or something and starts twitching and squeaking ike a baby elephant with parkinsons EB gets put on top team Anonymous (D wHTiHO) 031914(Wed)20 28 25 UTC-5 No 538041 137 Repbes-altm months without inc Most people don't give him s--- anymore, mostly because he's just a rice guy as long as youre cool to him -No rodents aside from ǎfew close cals with Greg the Midy Autistc Hppo Apparently in Ireland they don't have gangs, they have paramiltaries fighting between whether Northen Ireland is British or Ih >He plays ㅕ down sit bd ican lell some s--- must havo happened because he always changes the subject when it gets close to home Edgy fapgot Luke comes back to school Luke hangs around with a pack of n------ who are al apparenty in a gang, he lkes to pretend he's part of this "gang and caries this f------ Stankey knie around that he painted red and blue for some reason One day at lunch Luke comes up to EB and out of nowhere stats asking fhis dad is alcohoic TopE Weveryore rto everyone to Nope aound Well tuck Ird wanna siff sptI had to sht out a daft bastardlke yourset. Jog on "You wirt totuck with the wrong person today Irish boy? EB starts laughing, lHeraly loses his sht at the ste of this Itie fagpot in a trenchcoat with a stanley knfe and actualy presses Ee gabs tes wnst, takes the tabled tlade from the hands of the chosen one, tosses t wer a fence and punches hrm straight nthe face We're out geting beer, Im with a 7/10 GT that Ive had a crush on for tucking months Her and EB get along realy wel, athough I sort of think she only hung out with us because EB did That right when we're all drunk me and QT end up f------ Leaving out my side because this is the ballad of Eight Beer, not me Spend ages taiking with QT, establish that she apparenty realy lkes me back Bro bonding beer EB heads up to bed, I stay down with the other guys to watch TV, OT was asleep when I came down About an hour later hear some noise and a scream from upstairs QT comes nunning dow with a towel round her, soaking wet, and runs out the front door Apparently EB sleeps naked, not surprised since I've found him naked before after a night of drinking ンsays she carne on to him even ater ali s--- she sat laughs and says hetook aprt to bed wth hm, it was tnthe table and when she ied onwth him hetossed 1 idioer her Threw her clothes out the window into the rain and told her to go and fetch Two weeks later he takes me to a pub and hooks me up with a 90 Anonymous 0D wHTH00句03.191 4(Wed 20 43:59 UTC-5 No 5380440 14 Rapaas-upum mamum wa 2242|ap -EB·nd rme are, total bros after berg frendsforafew years Having him as a best friend is like having those flashy trainers as a kid S--- :Hm and E汨were close, mostly because EB would buy him vidya and act super interested in the anme sht he lied because nobody elseother than me would loses has har er chemo aGotovst hin, EB is gong me 8礇there >He thinks rs awesome get our photo taken together wthout any har -EB lets him draw al kinds of dumb sht on his bad head, lets hm draw a dumb moustache on him l0 -Spend ages just dicking a >Son of a bitch luke who R is, Dukey the Rookle is across the bar in the same tucking trenchcoat he wore back at school :EB says hi, ch 右away to him ike noting ever happened >We head home and EB spend the night sitting up with me playing Batlefrant on my old PS2 and drinking, just trying to cheer me up me every time Sorry for that 2sad4me post, but iti make sense later Anonymous (ID woooec) 05/19/14(Wed20 5246 UTC-5 No 530045357 Reeses 쯔53awawmeesaaa Living together in a flst with some chick and her boyfriend The one song I remember isude Tomm by The Runyacks because it played when s--- went down -EB toldtem that he "an't bokn凱ytrouble lads, have beer and forget that trpeforthe night ye?" 4 of them jump on him, start beating the s--- out of him l tackle one of them to try help him, get the f--- beaten out of me but f--- that if's goddamn E8 in there EB broke the dudes He gets up, bleeding out of every pore in his beauoful irish body Bouncing around with his fists up, Iterally looks ike he could fly around the room he's bouncing that much The skinheads keep going for him but back off every time aher he swings, it looks lke he could knock a building down with that shi Babbing some incoherent sht in Irish rage, nobody understands the words but everyone understands the meaning pack up there sht n full swing theoughoud, lke a scene from a f------ movie Eight tucking beersl You splied eight of me f------ beers you hairless tuckin mongrels Dude is shouting ater the guys who jumped hm Eight beers lad, eight f------ beers What's the f------ craic there lke EB is going back to Ireland to vist his nan, she's real sick We land in Belfast I think thats the capital of the north but not of Ireland, idk how t worked EB never realy explained t, sad you won't understand the builshit poltics unless you grew up there sweetest tuckng old lady ever, says that E was always a rough lad but wk he'd never hurt a sour go 1o vist his nan with EB' greedy f----- This woman is clearly the most influenial family member in the Eight Beer famly EB shows me round Derry, tells me about how if's split religously and shows me this big ass wall Takes me to Befast agan and shows me the place where the ttanic was but -we end up gong to -Get pretty aurk.or place caled The Crown Bar per as EB calls it Walked around Belfast for a bt, he tels me about the history of some stut -Spend a few nights there, have a f------ blast but decide to head home, don't wanna be an inrusion on the whole nan stuation Plaus racbcally a part of Getting close to the end now. Shts hard to wnte, I miss hat f----- Anonymous (0D wH7HOC) 03/114(Wed1 18 48 UTC-5 No 538040230 "Apparently sme Kdoy Fidder caled Wiharm Wr寸 f----- EB when he wB5 8 kid caught agan night there nearly gets violent when -EB's sister gets beter, but is pretty f----- for ife Never talks, never leaves the house, she's pretty much a goddamn vegetable -EB spends aa of tvs trme oet work with her, rever come弓out arrymore, Not sts r, wth her we sormetmes com e round and drnk wth hrm bu -One nighe while he's sieeping, EB's f----- up sister OO's hve refuses to le ven, house note a55ung EBtht t's not tvs faut, ter's pretty muchth, meen su ct of过'don prt why she'd need to 5ay thot but㎡atever wH7HOQC) EB doesn't realy He doesn't want to go home because he has nothing there other than reminders, but doesntwn .He gets in 갠 few fights when we're out dming anyone who gves hm any 5ht gets mmediately f------ amidated nor e of th s ads everyone chl『 # that he used to do night he's dunk as Dude is fighting back tears >1 had t already guessed, but he starts teling me atout how he blames himseffor what happened to his sis have f------ known better this is his tail uterally canor change hs mind on this s---, looks like he has himse#1uly convincedth Pulls himsetr together We tak about old smes, laugh a bit things actuaily seem back so normal for a whle Ainight mabe. Let's have one for old time's sake, ae? a good hour He eventualy leaves, but before he goes he tells me that "You've been a good mate from day one mate. Honestly out on a limb rd do f----- anything for ya Take t easy lad He doesnt show up to work the next day EB doesn't reply to texts or answer place doeant answer is famly tatoo barmed hm5ef for not ㎞owng to protect hes 5ster and that he was too m serable to keep 5ht up I don't need thanked stopped grave every tme f-----

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I don't get it

File: images.ipg (4 KB, 270x186) Anonymous 06/17/15(Wed)10:49:45 No.622323355 dear friends, sorry for bad language >trade you want to buy a loaf of sandwich >you see that girl >at least 8 easily >try seduce >from the beginning I will be speechless >tile floors in the left part of the store what was last night you? >>O Anonymous 06/17/15(Wed)10:51:42 No.622323603 File ipg ipg (9 KB, 251x228) Is this a r--- Did you get r----
File: images.ipg (4 KB, 270x186) Anonymous 06/17/15(Wed)10:49:45 No.622323355 dear friends, sorry for bad language >trade you want to buy a loaf of sandwich >you see that girl >at least 8 easily >try seduce >from the beginning I will be speechless >tile floors in the left part of the store what was last night you? >>O Anonymous 06/17/15(Wed)10:51:42 No.622323603 File ipg ipg (9 KB, 251x228) Is this a r--- Did you get r----

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4chan bread green text stories

Childhood expiriences that scarred you

File: 1416426154444 png (42 KB, 548x399) Anonymous (ID: KE KED) 11/29/14(Sat)20:29:09 No.582089323 ITT: Post childhood experiences that scarred you for life. Let's all commiserate together. >be 11 or so >only child >family takes me to the beach on a hot summer day >be somewhat antisocial so I wander off by myself despite that there are plenty of other kids to hang out with >beach has rocky outcroppings mixed with sand dunes >everyone is on the dunes and the rocks are free to roam around on >spend about 15 minutes climbing the rocks and make it down to the part where they meet the water >8 or 9 foot long dead shark is laying decomposing on the rocks about 6 feet above the waterline >is placed so that It remains hidden from view from everyone else >lean down to take a closer look but suddenly overcome by the most horrible smell in the universe >bail out and run back to the dunes where the kids are and tell them there's a dead shark washed up on the rocks they get excited as f--- and run back over to where I said it was >l follow them back shouting that it stinks to high heaven and they should keep back >we return the spot where the shark was only to find some fat hairy crackhead hobo f------ the shark missionary style right on the rocks >no seriously >guy is at least 350 pounds, completely naked, hairier than Bigfoot, covered in dried-up s--- caked on to his hair >he's giving his sharkfu >pulls out his nanodick and nuts on the carcass >turns to look at us and gives us this creepy-ass clown smile >we all bolt to our parents on the beach screaming bloody murder >half of the kids puked their guts out on the way >police with attack dogs arrive on the beach in barely 10 minutes and send us all home never go to any beach ever again a piggy f--- in front of a bunch of kids
File: 1416426154444 png (42 KB, 548x399) Anonymous (ID: KE KED) 11/29/14(Sat)20:29:09 No.582089323 ITT: Post childhood experiences that scarred you for life. Let's all commiserate together. >be 11 or so >only child >family takes me to the beach on a hot summer day >be somewhat antisocial so I wander off by myself despite that there are plenty of other kids to hang out with >beach has rocky outcroppings mixed with sand dunes >everyone is on the dunes and the rocks are free to roam around on >spend about 15 minutes climbing the rocks and make it down to the part where they meet the water >8 or 9 foot long dead shark is laying decomposing on the rocks about 6 feet above the waterline >is placed so that It remains hidden from view from everyone else >lean down to take a closer look but suddenly overcome by the most horrible smell in the universe >bail out and run back to the dunes where the kids are and tell them there's a dead shark washed up on the rocks they get excited as f--- and run back over to where I said it was >l follow them back shouting that it stinks to high heaven and they should keep back >we return the spot where the shark was only to find some fat hairy crackhead hobo f------ the shark missionary style right on the rocks >no seriously >guy is at least 350 pounds, completely naked, hairier than Bigfoot, covered in dried-up s--- caked on to his hair >he's giving his sharkfu >pulls out his nanodick and nuts on the carcass >turns to look at us and gives us this creepy-ass clown smile >we all bolt to our parents on the beach screaming bloody murder >half of the kids puked their guts out on the way >police with attack dogs arrive on the beach in barely 10 minutes and send us all home never go to any beach ever again a piggy f--- in front of a bunch of kids

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Don't tell anyone

□ Anonymous 01/19/16(Mon)21:14:03 No.593700140トー2593700838 File: creamyipg (25 KB, 350x250) > 1st grade s on the bus going to school > feel unusual tummy rumbles > toomuchluckycharms.sys > spew rainbow colored vomit all over bus seat > feel much better > Look over to the next seat > little girl is staring at me with a look of pure terror > bus arrives at school > tell girl not to tell anyone > build some dank lego castles later > mfw no one found out it was me Anonymous 01/19/15(Mon)21:17:31 No.593700838 593700140 >kindergarten >1st grader vomits rainbows in seat next to me tells me not to tell anyone >shows me his penis >legit scared now >starts rubbing his penis in cereal vomit >holds up finger and makes 'shhhh' noise >get off bus >see him walking outside later >he is holding 2 legos that are put together >kept saying "look at my castle guys"
□ Anonymous 01/19/16(Mon)21:14:03 No.593700140トー2593700838 File: creamyipg (25 KB, 350x250) > 1st grade s on the bus going to school > feel unusual tummy rumbles > toomuchluckycharms.sys > spew rainbow colored vomit all over bus seat > feel much better > Look over to the next seat > little girl is staring at me with a look of pure terror > bus arrives at school > tell girl not to tell anyone > build some dank lego castles later > mfw no one found out it was me Anonymous 01/19/15(Mon)21:17:31 No.593700838 593700140 >kindergarten >1st grader vomits rainbows in seat next to me tells me not to tell anyone >shows me his penis >legit scared now >starts rubbing his penis in cereal vomit >holds up finger and makes 'shhhh' noise >get off bus >see him walking outside later >he is holding 2 legos that are put together >kept saying "look at my castle guys"

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that guy with the mints

File: altoids-01ipg (25 KB, 465x275) Anonymous (D: 6GA4MT 07/15/14(Tue)11:53:59 No.5567515145567518075567518762556752670556752813 5567531372556753161 556754195 556754251 hi /b/ I need some advice im looking to buy some mints to improve my popularity at school. I wanna be that guy with the mints' so people know they can come to me and ask for a mint at any time and CURIOUSTY STRONG MINTS i can give them one or two. mark the mint man, they might call me PEPPERMINT my question is, what mints do you think i should get? i need a flavour everyone will like, and im looking at buying a very very large amount in bulk. ldk like 10kg of them or something. got £500 to work with maybe something like altoids? what kind of mints would you like knowing your reliable friend has on him? suggest me some mints /b/ Anonymous (ID: +toN2-sm) 07/15/14(Tue)11:55:46 No.556751724 File: aye carumba.gif (1.91 MB, 320x180) Anonymous (ID: wl9zeaak) 07/15/14(Tue)11:57:24 No.556751889 File: image ipg (48 KB, 645x652) Anonymous (ID: DRcBLfDe) 07/15/14(Tue)11:56:38 No.556751807 4584 iog (26 KB, 500x476) >mark the mint man P> I wanna be that guy with the mints Anonymous (ID: POydivdU) 07/15/14(Tue)12:01:16 No.55675229522556753580 "becky where'd you go? >"hey Sabrina... Just got stopped by that weird kid. He asked me again if I wanted a mint..." >"yeah he's been doing that to everyone! Don't take them he looks autistic and they're probably poision! Sally said he's got like a garbage bag of them in his locker.." >"Omg what a fkn freak. Ok I'll just avoid eye contact from now on!" mark the mint man,they might call me is is your future op enjoy Anonymous (ID: e5Gq47xp) 07/15/14(Tue)12:02:09 No.556752405 Anonymous (ID: JuqSplp) 07/15/14(Tue)12:04:25 No.556752670 File: 1404443369992 gif (2.51 MB, 286x258) 43904 ipg (26 KB, 450x300) mark thè mint ma >mark the mint man P> Anonymous (ID: fnOLgmdJ) 07/15/14(Tue)12:16:05 No.556754014 File: mentos ong (81 KB, 230x217) mentoS Anonymous (ID: oZY9e510) 07/15/14(Tue)12:22:41 No.556754775 the laughter ipg (9 KB, 500x374) >mark the mint man The Freshmaker Anonymous (ID: 60 6GMA4MT ) 07/15/14(Tue)12:15:06 No.556753910556754109 P> Well my father suggested it to me since ive had a rough go at making friends. my father doesn't have many friends either, but he brings gum to work and says that people call him doublemint dave (because he carries doublemint gum), and that people like it. So l thought it might work for me too. 2133 my father doesn't have many friends either, but he brings gum to work and says that people call him doublemint dave hebringsgumtoworlandsaysthatpeoplecalhimdoublemintdave Anonymous (ID: fnoLgmdJ) 07/15/14(Tue)12:16:56 No.556754109 File: Hitler+was+basically+a+de .)png (105 KB, 218x301) doublemint dave 556753910 >doublemint f------ dave GIVE UP
File: altoids-01ipg (25 KB, 465x275) Anonymous (D: 6GA4MT 07/15/14(Tue)11:53:59 No.5567515145567518075567518762556752670556752813 5567531372556753161 556754195 556754251 hi /b/ I need some advice im looking to buy some mints to improve my popularity at school. I wanna be that guy with the mints' so people know they can come to me and ask for a mint at any time and CURIOUSTY STRONG MINTS i can give them one or two. mark the mint man, they might call me PEPPERMINT my question is, what mints do you think i should get? i need a flavour everyone will like, and im looking at buying a very very large amount in bulk. ldk like 10kg of them or something. got £500 to work with maybe something like altoids? what kind of mints would you like knowing your reliable friend has on him? suggest me some mints /b/ Anonymous (ID: +toN2-sm) 07/15/14(Tue)11:55:46 No.556751724 File: aye carumba.gif (1.91 MB, 320x180) Anonymous (ID: wl9zeaak) 07/15/14(Tue)11:57:24 No.556751889 File: image ipg (48 KB, 645x652) Anonymous (ID: DRcBLfDe) 07/15/14(Tue)11:56:38 No.556751807 4584 iog (26 KB, 500x476) >mark the mint man P> I wanna be that guy with the mints Anonymous (ID: POydivdU) 07/15/14(Tue)12:01:16 No.55675229522556753580 "becky where'd you go? >"hey Sabrina... Just got stopped by that weird kid. He asked me again if I wanted a mint..." >"yeah he's been doing that to everyone! Don't take them he looks autistic and they're probably poision! Sally said he's got like a garbage bag of them in his locker.." >"Omg what a fkn freak. Ok I'll just avoid eye contact from now on!" mark the mint man,they might call me is is your future op enjoy Anonymous (ID: e5Gq47xp) 07/15/14(Tue)12:02:09 No.556752405 Anonymous (ID: JuqSplp) 07/15/14(Tue)12:04:25 No.556752670 File: 1404443369992 gif (2.51 MB, 286x258) 43904 ipg (26 KB, 450x300) mark thè mint ma >mark the mint man P> Anonymous (ID: fnOLgmdJ) 07/15/14(Tue)12:16:05 No.556754014 File: mentos ong (81 KB, 230x217) mentoS Anonymous (ID: oZY9e510) 07/15/14(Tue)12:22:41 No.556754775 the laughter ipg (9 KB, 500x374) >mark the mint man The Freshmaker Anonymous (ID: 60 6GMA4MT ) 07/15/14(Tue)12:15:06 No.556753910556754109 P> Well my father suggested it to me since ive had a rough go at making friends. my father doesn't have many friends either, but he brings gum to work and says that people call him doublemint dave (because he carries doublemint gum), and that people like it. So l thought it might work for me too. 2133 my father doesn't have many friends either, but he brings gum to work and says that people call him doublemint dave hebringsgumtoworlandsaysthatpeoplecalhimdoublemintdave Anonymous (ID: fnoLgmdJ) 07/15/14(Tue)12:16:56 No.556754109 File: Hitler+was+basically+a+de .)png (105 KB, 218x301) doublemint dave 556753910 >doublemint f------ dave GIVE UP

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green text stories 4chan mints

Oohgie

Lu as ris for a diplonsky cheek and takes the ead by speaking wth the Ope hought picking up Dhge Clangclang When ve tmally loc abed ane of the man staryline queh, ve aso happened to pasa by a temple of Moradin, whichhad twe docen farges surounding iR for his follawers to craft weapora for god anw eho was wonhiped n the god of cesuction and undoing Prety sweet sul as we kopt geting closer and closer The We eee uted the play perfecly The lait lows betore the in aw told Oagie to Lucas, whe had enough desuction sighed beavdy l cald say Doghie had a natural 20 the god break the groppe but now had sneed Coghie longnaugh to cast a spel ot Destuction ogiecolbpsed in a beap, and the ged tumed to tace u a good aaunt of denons He called every singe t something ohgie We wtreused doce Deaves ral around thowing around onders and comeunds in ancent Darvish The prest poied to wihat had been causing the sckat be wrected to homar the tall of the god Thee on my hands, wee Oge's Wristy Gead Glove barered eas of
Lu as ris for a diplonsky cheek and takes the ead by speaking wth the Ope hought picking up Dhge Clangclang When ve tmally loc abed ane of the man staryline queh, ve aso happened to pasa by a temple of Moradin, whichhad twe docen farges surounding iR for his follawers to craft weapora for god anw eho was wonhiped n the god of cesuction and undoing Prety sweet sul as we kopt geting closer and closer The We eee uted the play perfecly The lait lows betore the in aw told Oagie to Lucas, whe had enough desuction sighed beavdy l cald say Doghie had a natural 20 the god break the groppe but now had sneed Coghie longnaugh to cast a spel ot Destuction ogiecolbpsed in a beap, and the ged tumed to tace u a good aaunt of denons He called every singe t something ohgie We wtreused doce Deaves ral around thowing around onders and comeunds in ancent Darvish The prest poied to wihat had been causing the sckat be wrected to homar the tall of the god Thee on my hands, wee Oge's Wristy Gead Glove barered eas of

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The Roemer Saga

go to special VIPw.bokng pw gans btrリho usdersele of my boese selakres1 spa my。.. kpping cand The hing knacksould be necked ovwr This is jst the Sost of many stories, an this ne is aiss one of the least crazy oes Roome Saga part 2 Roeme sang And whee I say good, I mean sesausly tcking good Twe guys siting behind h stat facking with hins dueng biology dlass RBO TIME Roenw janps ov is tabe (Ramer aluays sat in front af the clascam) and grabs a broom standing against the wa Reeew go cking saper saan and rass out the class e a bl The gays who got ht with the brean the ely one who et into touble theaght Roe would get espel ed. bt is was only the beiing The Raene, Saga Part 3 How can roa ka th which has ea Ite? THE PLAN ROEMERBO ACTMATED The Rawmer 8aga Pat 4 Feend or For? tans doing his sigte move I described is the Sost post ALL YOU F------ LOOKING AT h Rseer Saga Pat 5 PARTY HARD the claan %ear were died an explanason or about two wesks ater the nsidering 'e in th grade and Roener in about single least seal persan in haman history thinknny to talk about tapping eache ands theing abbengasited eacher doesn dare to come near him because Roemer at kseps on pg m sery ifs taking sa long but bappened sauch a long time ago I dont reember same thing so dy The Roene Sags Pat T Aspesges can be beso's 10 g miget rom Romers old class etats buggingR es t ke a f------ batsing ram agan the gay's bedy Out of ckng nowhare some mach older kids show They Tale, the mdget d put hr, rt: Irge round hab can Ths was a very impartat "vet, because Raemer's cortdence level weer MAY up, un.twg tat u. caae mose ru or Staring in the spring gym clanis is now uside Dea decides to ht Rawmer cehis shouider whis cycling past hm 04106-57 Na 38237448 1334053327129 KB. 400425 Jniae13, hugh nly halt ofus are in class the rest of the day The Rseeto Saga Pat 9 PARTY HARD 2 The ltle sedhead midge I mentoned ae was having a paty, and he rvted almat anyone AND THEN IT 404ED
go to special VIPw.bokng pw gans btrリho usdersele of my boese selakres1 spa my。.. kpping cand The hing knacksould be necked ovwr This is jst the Sost of many stories, an this ne is aiss one of the least crazy oes Roome Saga part 2 Roeme sang And whee I say good, I mean sesausly tcking good Twe guys siting behind h stat facking with hins dueng biology dlass RBO TIME Roenw janps ov is tabe (Ramer aluays sat in front af the clascam) and grabs a broom standing against the wa Reeew go cking saper saan and rass out the class e a bl The gays who got ht with the brean the ely one who et into touble theaght Roe would get espel ed. bt is was only the beiing The Raene, Saga Part 3 How can roa ka th which has ea Ite? THE PLAN ROEMERBO ACTMATED The Rawmer 8aga Pat 4 Feend or For? tans doing his sigte move I described is the Sost post ALL YOU F------ LOOKING AT h Rseer Saga Pat 5 PARTY HARD the claan %ear were died an explanason or about two wesks ater the nsidering 'e in th grade and Roener in about single least seal persan in haman history thinknny to talk about tapping eache ands theing abbengasited eacher doesn dare to come near him because Roemer at kseps on pg m sery ifs taking sa long but bappened sauch a long time ago I dont reember same thing so dy The Roene Sags Pat T Aspesges can be beso's 10 g miget rom Romers old class etats buggingR es t ke a f------ batsing ram agan the gay's bedy Out of ckng nowhare some mach older kids show They Tale, the mdget d put hr, rt: Irge round hab can Ths was a very impartat "vet, because Raemer's cortdence level weer MAY up, un.twg tat u. caae mose ru or Staring in the spring gym clanis is now uside Dea decides to ht Rawmer cehis shouider whis cycling past hm 04106-57 Na 38237448 1334053327129 KB. 400425 Jniae13, hugh nly halt ofus are in class the rest of the day The Rseeto Saga Pat 9 PARTY HARD 2 The ltle sedhead midge I mentoned ae was having a paty, and he rvted almat anyone AND THEN IT 404ED

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greentext tard story

Fats Mcgee and the Retard Three. Extended cut!

Anonymous (ID: 2042 Eb) 03/01/12(Thu) 15:38 №3843755.1 [ ! ] 2238437f0e)wennt2 >> 43e240 2384374240 very well. This is the first tme l met four men t changed my ife This the Fats Mogee, and his Retard Three. History in the cafeteria, due to the sa of the class Fats Mcgose and Retard Thrae walk in, push past ma, go to winding machne ryamare of just how large and ape Rke Fats Mcg ats Mcgee gets hes arm stuck in vanding machine, tryng to reach up to pul Chips out and Raing AMy entre dy55 has 5topped to =atch the chaos. One of the Retand Three starts blaning me, in his sputtering retard tone Fats Mcgee wets hinself, les there in a puddle of urne crying, am in the vending machine Freighters had to come and cut the vending machine to s--- to free him Thus begins a legend of unstoppable tard with mine one Snal time as they ad he away he Tales of Fats Mcgee and the Ratand Threa part ttng rclmroom, working on some school tuffくAt thn port, mn trying to get my Mautun) Fats Mogee and his retard three are running down the hal, bursiting into classrooms and waing to be Plepon gs, youre derupting my clsroom iLet's。汱 same tegh-pitched urgie nose, a nose I'd come to cal The Song ofthe Tarr Starts trying to take the ple of essay's T'm grading Tard Guard waks in Ths Tard Guard managed to lose har Tards 勹parsonale don't agree they can't help it, bacause I havu aapecial oicatun fanily m new "ho d Fata Mega" and his Ratard Three part 3: Navenga of th·S--- nd up,xpecting someane to have a lne,becan I teach in one of the s-------- schools in the Fats Mogee and his Retard Three have walked in and started screaming Retard Speech at ths grl, b OU HAVE FIRED BECAUSE OF I wak back to classroom, but not bafore seong that Fats had royally s--- hier. Bad anough that it doesnt even look y,1 start akngskin off Asoermoes(ID: 2042GEb) 03/01/12(Thu) 16: 17 No 384381482 [冂22384382092 22286382735 223843B3dai 2238438SOL Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three part Ⅳ: The F eld ahve [with the sound of Tard Rage》 2Fats must be』sophomore about the port. I have my Masters, and plan on "orang on my ome the Baseball coach, because the previous one was amested for ddding the pickle of students Lead students towards Field for fourth block, which is Practice/Strength and Conditioning carly-35k Tard Giyd if they can wrap沈up, snce the Tards only have the field for third block, Tard Guard, a hot one that I actualy le,starts rounding thee up, doing her job. fats Mcgee decides to continue what w引be 규 war until he graduates uning away fron T Tard Guard, begns pursut ats runs up the bladws. Hagets to the top, and hurts res biuljeans at thú Tard Guard. Thsi Tard Guard is pagged, and i now wappad in hit-covered u Guard guts close, becomng . :9438200 The Tale of Fats Mogee and hs Retand Three part : Fiald bay. HomNcoming Day: which meas we don't do s---, and are ara various activiies for the stink. He slo4 day old boled cabbage that has been eft out in the sun, and mannabed in piss female friend passes by, is ㎝arty pleased with my Trendness, towards Tards nie points, but hope in my he art that the look of terror on my face betrays the idea The Three 3re sti1stamg One i5 00ing, and it's 5tartng to pool on my book. oud noisetig the Racads to 'go tha luck anay Basabal player walk up,scarts I become best friends with a player of nrw. Ray. Hul be rriportant later. Notica that there's s--- t on the bleacher nxt to me, and the book t was studying ied Anonymoun(ID: 2042GEb) 03/01/12(Thu) 18:42 №55055112 [ ! ] 22384 asss2 22 48s赳22294220425 The Tale of Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three Part VI: An Exchange of Blows. This honer goes to Ray more than anything- If you're out there, man.This was f------ gonious. ter of Fat's Sophore year e have baen many menor avants betmoan part v and Part VI, but nothing that woldnt ba much more thn a ropeat Has bean deaing with Pats Mcgas sst for two and a half years now a big gane because ofa Diaco Themed Prom for t Tand Enpre y inds r grves Fat's fnand 6ftson dolrs bo, in th" modSu of prom, whip hi·dck aut and start ruting『ata with it. Ray convre"" me to go to ths prom where he'= bong a peer taev, taling m th t ita bo 'worth it' atting, being bored and mtated at Ray Buddeny, ane of the Retard Thr whis out his d--- and starts nubbing it againet Fats ch my god Ray you Suddenly. Fats Fats whips out goes into Rage Mode: Final Form his own, chode-lke Tard Penis and starts dueing his fiend, screaming in Tard Rage Fats suddenly grabs hie Tard Friend and hus hie into a big, plastic pillar they set up for pictures Fats has removed hs pants completsly, and in aving ha d--- around, paing on wveything. Retwd Speed, and start Ray puls him off, but gets in trouble laber for Attacking the kid because of ltimabe Mother Bitch Mode l think at that point Fats realized how bad he f----- up.Because he just started crying Thus, the beginning of the End had amived Fats Moges and his Racand Three part Va: End of the Bagining of tha End umner, but I'v school, ar thay'd ind a may to blame ma or the school 1 have to t can't get damaged know for a fact Fats in turring 10 soon, becauss hea eld back a year in midde school so I could get hm One day, after moving to a ness classroom, Fats begns to fade from my mind because Tm not so close to hm use I'm an outdoorsman at heart Suddenly. I hear a huge bang on the ndow, and nearly go fying out of my chair t looks ke he just ate a smal aninal Hs face covered, iterally,in Ketchup, hunks of food, and o At this point, Fats has grown a P--- Beard He has vogetables and s--- hanging from isma N stare, knowing mry faba only seperated by a layer of glass. around the window, and it's vistiy roasy ☆em where res skr, not the food, has touched ohe mouths Dessebuuuuuu through the windo bafore gutting cled anay by a Tard Guard, and taken back A fw days later, nodents resueH now knows where 1 am Tm teaching U.S. Hatory, when sudderly a Ch my f------ u, n. Nearly beat the hell out of the Tardlet and evenbually resort to screaming and fiing to maike them ee T need to put my plan into Anonymous (ID: 20g2GE) 03/01/12(Thu)17:07 3843茆153 [ ! ] 20)Messe >>38438957초 The Tale of Fats McGee and his Retard Three, Part VH:A Farewel to Arme part 1 rols around. Apei sst cones it tuns out, Fats is an avid fan of movies, and loves going to the cinona it's tmi. I prapar-reyself, before wakang temards the movii. I don't let hn see ma unta wu'r·in tha conc y mada frash Ths is going to hurt rally f------ bad, but it'l be worth it. Anonymous (ID: zbRED》 03/01/12(Thu)17: 11 №354359884 [ 2deo)0292 The Final Story of Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three Fats starts freaking the f--- out, shaking. widen as she recogrizes m Fats suddenly throws the steaning popcom at me, and unges on e getting waled on by a Retard The Final Stary of Fats ncredbly agreve and rage-fed No matter what happens, no matter hos old I get his Retard Three nd you ever plan on tarding it Just remenber who stands between you, and chaos, you sniveing ittle Down S--- And thus enda, the Tale of Fars Mogea.
Anonymous (ID: 2042 Eb) 03/01/12(Thu) 15:38 №3843755.1 [ ! ] 2238437f0e)wennt2 >> 43e240 2384374240 very well. This is the first tme l met four men t changed my ife This the Fats Mogee, and his Retard Three. History in the cafeteria, due to the sa of the class Fats Mcgose and Retard Thrae walk in, push past ma, go to winding machne ryamare of just how large and ape Rke Fats Mcg ats Mcgee gets hes arm stuck in vanding machine, tryng to reach up to pul Chips out and Raing AMy entre dy55 has 5topped to =atch the chaos. One of the Retand Three starts blaning me, in his sputtering retard tone Fats Mcgee wets hinself, les there in a puddle of urne crying, am in the vending machine Freighters had to come and cut the vending machine to s--- to free him Thus begins a legend of unstoppable tard with mine one Snal time as they ad he away he Tales of Fats Mcgee and the Ratand Threa part ttng rclmroom, working on some school tuffくAt thn port, mn trying to get my Mautun) Fats Mogee and his retard three are running down the hal, bursiting into classrooms and waing to be Plepon gs, youre derupting my clsroom iLet's。汱 same tegh-pitched urgie nose, a nose I'd come to cal The Song ofthe Tarr Starts trying to take the ple of essay's T'm grading Tard Guard waks in Ths Tard Guard managed to lose har Tards 勹parsonale don't agree they can't help it, bacause I havu aapecial oicatun fanily m new "ho d Fata Mega" and his Ratard Three part 3: Navenga of th·S--- nd up,xpecting someane to have a lne,becan I teach in one of the s-------- schools in the Fats Mogee and his Retard Three have walked in and started screaming Retard Speech at ths grl, b OU HAVE FIRED BECAUSE OF I wak back to classroom, but not bafore seong that Fats had royally s--- hier. Bad anough that it doesnt even look y,1 start akngskin off Asoermoes(ID: 2042GEb) 03/01/12(Thu) 16: 17 No 384381482 [冂22384382092 22286382735 223843B3dai 2238438SOL Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three part Ⅳ: The F eld ahve [with the sound of Tard Rage》 2Fats must be』sophomore about the port. I have my Masters, and plan on "orang on my ome the Baseball coach, because the previous one was amested for ddding the pickle of students Lead students towards Field for fourth block, which is Practice/Strength and Conditioning carly-35k Tard Giyd if they can wrap沈up, snce the Tards only have the field for third block, Tard Guard, a hot one that I actualy le,starts rounding thee up, doing her job. fats Mcgee decides to continue what w引be 규 war until he graduates uning away fron T Tard Guard, begns pursut ats runs up the bladws. Hagets to the top, and hurts res biuljeans at thú Tard Guard. Thsi Tard Guard is pagged, and i now wappad in hit-covered u Guard guts close, becomng . :9438200 The Tale of Fats Mogee and hs Retand Three part : Fiald bay. HomNcoming Day: which meas we don't do s---, and are ara various activiies for the stink. He slo4 day old boled cabbage that has been eft out in the sun, and mannabed in piss female friend passes by, is ㎝arty pleased with my Trendness, towards Tards nie points, but hope in my he art that the look of terror on my face betrays the idea The Three 3re sti1stamg One i5 00ing, and it's 5tartng to pool on my book. oud noisetig the Racads to 'go tha luck anay Basabal player walk up,scarts I become best friends with a player of nrw. Ray. Hul be rriportant later. Notica that there's s--- t on the bleacher nxt to me, and the book t was studying ied Anonymoun(ID: 2042GEb) 03/01/12(Thu) 18:42 №55055112 [ ! ] 22384 asss2 22 48s赳22294220425 The Tale of Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three Part VI: An Exchange of Blows. This honer goes to Ray more than anything- If you're out there, man.This was f------ gonious. ter of Fat's Sophore year e have baen many menor avants betmoan part v and Part VI, but nothing that woldnt ba much more thn a ropeat Has bean deaing with Pats Mcgas sst for two and a half years now a big gane because ofa Diaco Themed Prom for t Tand Enpre y inds r grves Fat's fnand 6ftson dolrs bo, in th" modSu of prom, whip hi·dck aut and start ruting『ata with it. Ray convre"" me to go to ths prom where he'= bong a peer taev, taling m th t ita bo 'worth it' atting, being bored and mtated at Ray Buddeny, ane of the Retard Thr whis out his d--- and starts nubbing it againet Fats ch my god Ray you Suddenly. Fats Fats whips out goes into Rage Mode: Final Form his own, chode-lke Tard Penis and starts dueing his fiend, screaming in Tard Rage Fats suddenly grabs hie Tard Friend and hus hie into a big, plastic pillar they set up for pictures Fats has removed hs pants completsly, and in aving ha d--- around, paing on wveything. Retwd Speed, and start Ray puls him off, but gets in trouble laber for Attacking the kid because of ltimabe Mother Bitch Mode l think at that point Fats realized how bad he f----- up.Because he just started crying Thus, the beginning of the End had amived Fats Moges and his Racand Three part Va: End of the Bagining of tha End umner, but I'v school, ar thay'd ind a may to blame ma or the school 1 have to t can't get damaged know for a fact Fats in turring 10 soon, becauss hea eld back a year in midde school so I could get hm One day, after moving to a ness classroom, Fats begns to fade from my mind because Tm not so close to hm use I'm an outdoorsman at heart Suddenly. I hear a huge bang on the ndow, and nearly go fying out of my chair t looks ke he just ate a smal aninal Hs face covered, iterally,in Ketchup, hunks of food, and o At this point, Fats has grown a P--- Beard He has vogetables and s--- hanging from isma N stare, knowing mry faba only seperated by a layer of glass. around the window, and it's vistiy roasy ☆em where res skr, not the food, has touched ohe mouths Dessebuuuuuu through the windo bafore gutting cled anay by a Tard Guard, and taken back A fw days later, nodents resueH now knows where 1 am Tm teaching U.S. Hatory, when sudderly a Ch my f------ u, n. Nearly beat the hell out of the Tardlet and evenbually resort to screaming and fiing to maike them ee T need to put my plan into Anonymous (ID: 20g2GE) 03/01/12(Thu)17:07 3843茆153 [ ! ] 20)Messe >>38438957초 The Tale of Fats McGee and his Retard Three, Part VH:A Farewel to Arme part 1 rols around. Apei sst cones it tuns out, Fats is an avid fan of movies, and loves going to the cinona it's tmi. I prapar-reyself, before wakang temards the movii. I don't let hn see ma unta wu'r·in tha conc y mada frash Ths is going to hurt rally f------ bad, but it'l be worth it. Anonymous (ID: zbRED》 03/01/12(Thu)17: 11 №354359884 [ 2deo)0292 The Final Story of Fats Mcgee and his Retard Three Fats starts freaking the f--- out, shaking. widen as she recogrizes m Fats suddenly throws the steaning popcom at me, and unges on e getting waled on by a Retard The Final Stary of Fats ncredbly agreve and rage-fed No matter what happens, no matter hos old I get his Retard Three nd you ever plan on tarding it Just remenber who stands between you, and chaos, you sniveing ittle Down S--- And thus enda, the Tale of Fars Mogea.

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greentext tard story

The Great Tard War

, , Arjt rou. I've rever dr thi, been but I'm, fuckrg posed as hel But I nt became single and feel Strathefuck in a thin night tk wi So b I wish to tell you the legendary story of the Quk Tard War Anongmous 0 The Powder K TO krow w---- ns sory gorgtogo you, seed to know BetontngMy midde school was essentially a an parallel to t wa nked to the coeteda The two other halls inking these and ming paraliel were or pecial class cocking and shd) and reular acaderic classes (math, reading s--- But buried far back ear thi caferia and between the 2 man halb wire the turds These wst t tarch hese wee any facker who no one didnt want around, and was popdated by the wost dregs of huranity Luckily be se et roors was buried in the back, a senionity lct lok plac f the school 8th in the back so the 8th graders with EXP boosts would almost always be the first to see and Anonymous Diumaan20 32 14 No 595750509 Rum destine Chapter 2. Fuel Keep paying aeon this sha in boing but important treated hor Tards e de spacial shas tir parerts thought dhay woe honeryue a tard, she woul out and yell at you for ataring at Then things furking changed for cur schodl was being tom down to build a new ane to raks things c npressed ibesal to New iaral bitich who we shail call Libby, made one change immeciatsly which was to hae tards indetact wth felow student, by takingすwn to the batoorn whae class changed so they caasinteract with the rest of paying atontion Anonymous 011/5r20 4264 No 59575168 5 Chapter 3. The Spak oeul day came early, whe the tards were unleashed to make t ants tand-wrangr support was lax Instead of the prewlo protocal, which was to have tards handded BiR scese tarts ar o rot all Eseated equol kid narod Ma was at his locker oppos4e the tand whie everyone He sceed and purnched the dowty kid o which he r ost a tand yol of tunder and began sawhng They foughe for 5 nutes, untd some Libby showed up and separated them it was only then we got to see the hat the staft had to seriously protect the tads fiom the dangers of the rest of the school ak was spended Chapher 4 Rising s foorball sradium er usailess Now a few noo dotads that ae kind of neces say This aa happened ㅲ the Sochafere tory, of being school w s mcee ton happy 00 make-the worst tickang decisons tavor of pol鶾01 conecness Se·and th the important bit Hisparse 5riggers, and asians were ge" no sht far ther .Edr" . The only Lugely ignored N------ sold dnags in bathroons hispaics had sex. White would get high, and aians wodd operate some sh larn shaking on honework queshons. Basically the entieacial stabty of the schoel when" the war goes fron, a tand smearrguhinto namere tace to t becarring an al a war at A, first. this was yeat f--- the tands let tem ha"the new sht andleovゃus oloneUMy derranded tanh The tasds olected to 4pand ertietockiegsink 0 0f a wall in ne new school Chaptar 5, Stonning the Gats The pest 10 thiew aft and der anded a hat to 얘 batroce, ativises wnot supervision The ortie Every one was plssed and the tands were wrangled bock into the regur sysem although Uibby shill dagged for tucking up everything Oee day during the cold dry winter days, the war changed Heroes emerged among the tards to rally and stop Thay got thn rae from the pure black of the s--- thay praduced from eating nothing but crackers and caros tads to the batroors just for thut, and blamed the s--- show on us haassing the tards The priile changed The 텨aek Turts operations rwofred leave'O shin water four tarsand or, door handes Anu wt no coe dowry kids youve ever seen, who secrety cary sha anong ther sellow tands opened thers Duning lunch, studerts threw fings at the tards and stall did the HURS, but to ltfe effect. Soon tho Jar total sta" caught on rd tode 06ages ,vNch*as the signal for a sti tte haaway bocane only lasted so long Anonymous 01/315821 13 16 No. 595756342 Jeffies was a dangerous, shet downy kid you woulde hnk anything of itwas aored he wasrt real ook control of the Back Turds in Duing lunch, Jeffses was able to es ape hi wranglers and wander the halls rew to this unnes had to assan. drnance over twr Ewes e retuned to hn tant wrangen.Ktceous by rwanga operasng-ndeyond economy by thong sh. 죄 over the bathoorn black Libby brushhed these Y as accidents and code ang bic ane the nom Anonymous 01/Juwsan21 2, 54 No 595757540 Rom dermeg Chapter B, Losing the War Jefres becane a target it was obvious if we broke hirs, the black tunds would fall with their leader. The pan Ths assassination aempt was canied out in eady sping whan hot piss and c-- would smell most awful A n----- ran for oer fron the wrangkrs inhge Jetvies lot out a scram as eto sumse his hoard for batte tardon had eoreplete comtrol. and I erysef was returing ore an oudoor gym els whan the Sse alas went off. People wae flooding from ou his black ord their worst Anonymous D/3USSat21 22 03 No 935758542 R Chapter & Atemoth The locker" t my xchod had lfde lits ㎝ ther. I dat know why But these umali uit1 wers Jefrwa, target He and his black tun em bdshoved sht intoeey cker they ould ed Liquid shst was spray ed into eft. The entire 7th grade hallway was sealed semporaely as the lockers had to be nmedaly cleaned withoul noiced to check defeated. Jefties Lbby defended them, and there was noting we cous beon foced to accept the tards e contiol as h grade du we wet.逌trapped r What batter game to play r, pr, than a 4 class wth game of dodgebat? Dunng the parse, Jettses was bounding anound ike the tad he was an he axpected no one would dare hare hin knowing ful wel the sevenge he would unleash Ignac io didint hae anyhing to lose here Chapte T Target faig soese of hd lusso and knewrg that his possessions had been covered insist had brought him and juriping. knxinghir' of' balance and senhg ten face hst rtetPw told wood bor the gym It was in this moment that he slowly began to a head to sound the ard alar or ssand pain Chapter 12. Suise eas as e al the good in the world had fnaly retaied And thon a peel of blood fonned undor Jetries manged The game immediutely stopped. The gym teachens and tand wrangers had bean aff thair garme today To content knowing things were so set themselves conecty The black hurd beam which had naned everything w t urnhne fell upan that magntcent charct f an Jeffres had a broken sos. Thats f------ R But his ev orded an investiagtion of the school and camers were installed which showed that the tands were respons ble for tearing out the sink in he The oid seoel was om down all studertsn o ed to thee EXCEPT THE FUCKONG TARDS foorball iold Thair And not a single peson rated Igeacio out, he shall go on a legend ie my heart Hope you ejayed b
, , Arjt rou. I've rever dr thi, been but I'm, fuckrg posed as hel But I nt became single and feel Strathefuck in a thin night tk wi So b I wish to tell you the legendary story of the Quk Tard War Anongmous 0 The Powder K TO krow w---- ns sory gorgtogo you, seed to know BetontngMy midde school was essentially a an parallel to t wa nked to the coeteda The two other halls inking these and ming paraliel were or pecial class cocking and shd) and reular acaderic classes (math, reading s--- But buried far back ear thi caferia and between the 2 man halb wire the turds These wst t tarch hese wee any facker who no one didnt want around, and was popdated by the wost dregs of huranity Luckily be se et roors was buried in the back, a senionity lct lok plac f the school 8th in the back so the 8th graders with EXP boosts would almost always be the first to see and Anonymous Diumaan20 32 14 No 595750509 Rum destine Chapter 2. Fuel Keep paying aeon this sha in boing but important treated hor Tards e de spacial shas tir parerts thought dhay woe honeryue a tard, she woul out and yell at you for ataring at Then things furking changed for cur schodl was being tom down to build a new ane to raks things c npressed ibesal to New iaral bitich who we shail call Libby, made one change immeciatsly which was to hae tards indetact wth felow student, by takingすwn to the batoorn whae class changed so they caasinteract with the rest of paying atontion Anonymous 011/5r20 4264 No 59575168 5 Chapter 3. The Spak oeul day came early, whe the tards were unleashed to make t ants tand-wrangr support was lax Instead of the prewlo protocal, which was to have tards handded BiR scese tarts ar o rot all Eseated equol kid narod Ma was at his locker oppos4e the tand whie everyone He sceed and purnched the dowty kid o which he r ost a tand yol of tunder and began sawhng They foughe for 5 nutes, untd some Libby showed up and separated them it was only then we got to see the hat the staft had to seriously protect the tads fiom the dangers of the rest of the school ak was spended Chapher 4 Rising s foorball sradium er usailess Now a few noo dotads that ae kind of neces say This aa happened ㅲ the Sochafere tory, of being school w s mcee ton happy 00 make-the worst tickang decisons tavor of pol鶾01 conecness Se·and th the important bit Hisparse 5riggers, and asians were ge" no sht far ther .Edr" . The only Lugely ignored N------ sold dnags in bathroons hispaics had sex. White would get high, and aians wodd operate some sh larn shaking on honework queshons. Basically the entieacial stabty of the schoel when" the war goes fron, a tand smearrguhinto namere tace to t becarring an al a war at A, first. this was yeat f--- the tands let tem ha"the new sht andleovゃus oloneUMy derranded tanh The tasds olected to 4pand ertietockiegsink 0 0f a wall in ne new school Chaptar 5, Stonning the Gats The pest 10 thiew aft and der anded a hat to 얘 batroce, ativises wnot supervision The ortie Every one was plssed and the tands were wrangled bock into the regur sysem although Uibby shill dagged for tucking up everything Oee day during the cold dry winter days, the war changed Heroes emerged among the tards to rally and stop Thay got thn rae from the pure black of the s--- thay praduced from eating nothing but crackers and caros tads to the batroors just for thut, and blamed the s--- show on us haassing the tards The priile changed The 텨aek Turts operations rwofred leave'O shin water four tarsand or, door handes Anu wt no coe dowry kids youve ever seen, who secrety cary sha anong ther sellow tands opened thers Duning lunch, studerts threw fings at the tards and stall did the HURS, but to ltfe effect. Soon tho Jar total sta" caught on rd tode 06ages ,vNch*as the signal for a sti tte haaway bocane only lasted so long Anonymous 01/315821 13 16 No. 595756342 Jeffies was a dangerous, shet downy kid you woulde hnk anything of itwas aored he wasrt real ook control of the Back Turds in Duing lunch, Jeffses was able to es ape hi wranglers and wander the halls rew to this unnes had to assan. drnance over twr Ewes e retuned to hn tant wrangen.Ktceous by rwanga operasng-ndeyond economy by thong sh. 죄 over the bathoorn black Libby brushhed these Y as accidents and code ang bic ane the nom Anonymous 01/Juwsan21 2, 54 No 595757540 Rom dermeg Chapter B, Losing the War Jefres becane a target it was obvious if we broke hirs, the black tunds would fall with their leader. The pan Ths assassination aempt was canied out in eady sping whan hot piss and c-- would smell most awful A n----- ran for oer fron the wrangkrs inhge Jetvies lot out a scram as eto sumse his hoard for batte tardon had eoreplete comtrol. and I erysef was returing ore an oudoor gym els whan the Sse alas went off. People wae flooding from ou his black ord their worst Anonymous D/3USSat21 22 03 No 935758542 R Chapter & Atemoth The locker" t my xchod had lfde lits ㎝ ther. I dat know why But these umali uit1 wers Jefrwa, target He and his black tun em bdshoved sht intoeey cker they ould ed Liquid shst was spray ed into eft. The entire 7th grade hallway was sealed semporaely as the lockers had to be nmedaly cleaned withoul noiced to check defeated. Jefties Lbby defended them, and there was noting we cous beon foced to accept the tards e contiol as h grade du we wet.逌trapped r What batter game to play r, pr, than a 4 class wth game of dodgebat? Dunng the parse, Jettses was bounding anound ike the tad he was an he axpected no one would dare hare hin knowing ful wel the sevenge he would unleash Ignac io didint hae anyhing to lose here Chapte T Target faig soese of hd lusso and knewrg that his possessions had been covered insist had brought him and juriping. knxinghir' of' balance and senhg ten face hst rtetPw told wood bor the gym It was in this moment that he slowly began to a head to sound the ard alar or ssand pain Chapter 12. Suise eas as e al the good in the world had fnaly retaied And thon a peel of blood fonned undor Jetries manged The game immediutely stopped. The gym teachens and tand wrangers had bean aff thair garme today To content knowing things were so set themselves conecty The black hurd beam which had naned everything w t urnhne fell upan that magntcent charct f an Jeffres had a broken sos. Thats f------ R But his ev orded an investiagtion of the school and camers were installed which showed that the tands were respons ble for tearing out the sink in he The oid seoel was om down all studertsn o ed to thee EXCEPT THE FUCKONG TARDS foorball iold Thair And not a single peson rated Igeacio out, he shall go on a legend ie my heart Hope you ejayed b

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It all started because of lack of toilet paper


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4chan green text story anon toilet paper bible

Fap Bandit

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:32:58 No.6151361 70 22615136318 >It was the beginning of last year and my buddy (well call him 'E) worked as a baker at this local grocery store >This grocery store hires a bunch of tards from local high schools for co-op programs >E works with them consistently >One day get a text out of the blue > "GOOD GOD NO" >W-- is wrong dude? >Apparently E took his break and went for his mid day dump >Halfway through his business, when all of a sudden BOOM >The door to the bathroom is kicked in and there is a low mumbling coming from someone >This someone picks the stall right beside E >For a couple of second everything returns to normal other than some indiscernible mumbling > Then the tard releases a sky tearing screech that nearly knocks E off his seat in surprise >E decides that now is probably a good time to gtfo and quick >Alas, E is immobilized by his crap >Tries to finish quickly when suddenly a wet slapping sound echoes from the stall beside him >SWEET RAPTOR JESUS NO >The guy is fapping in the stall beside him >E gets out of there as quickly as possible and is finishing his lunch break when this Tard with Down syndrome emerges from the bathroom with j--- all over the front of his shirt >Doesn' t clean up and goes back to the deli to handle meats Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:34:04 No.615136318 22615136564 >615136170 >Later that week get another text from E IT WAS WORSE THIS TIME >Apparently the Fap Bandit has followed E up on his break this time. E tried to hold it in but it was not meant to be >Gave in to the need and tried to take the fastest dump of his life >Halfway through, the Fap Bandit returns >BOOM door kicked open, the mumbling resumes and he picks the stall right beside E >Ohno >E rushes to finish >The shriek that announces the reign of terror bellows out into the bathroom >E, in an ill fated attempt at trying to ignore it all looks at the shiny, polished floor >Sees a reflection, for whatever reason tries to discern it >It's a full view of the Fap Bandit pumping his potato >They lock eyes >ohcrap.jpg >Fap Bandit shrieks and uses his free hand to slam the side of the stall walls >E Finishes, gets out, and goes right back to work >Continues to work for about an hour, then notices the Fap Bandit in the deli. His black shirt had whitish stains on it >Fap Bandit smiles at him >E Takes rest of the day off Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:35:53 No.615136564 P> >Ok so it's been about a month since the last incident >The schools in the area have changed semesters so there's a new rotation except for the kids in full year co-op >The Fap Bandit is in full year co-op. Even worse, it seems as though he has recruited a bunch of his tard friends t turns out the Fap Bandit would follow E whenever he went to the bathroom, so E stopped taking dumps at work. >Unfortunately, he had Mexican food the night before >E rushes to the bathroom >Then it happens >BOOM the door kicked in as usual >This time there is a chorus of cacophonous tards forming a herd >W-- >The Fap Bandit had brought every available tard with him >The Fap Bandit sits in one stall beside him, another one on the other side and one is standing in front of his stall >Fap Bandit shrieks sets off the other tards >They start slamming on the walls of the stalls as the Fap Bandit is slapping the potato >E gets out of there and full on bodychecks the retard in front of his stall >Other employees in the breakroom horrified by the sound >E complains to the owner of the store whom he knows wel >Tards have to be escorted to the bathroom by Managers or someone >And so ended the reign of terror set forth by the Fap Bandit
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:32:58 No.6151361 70 22615136318 >It was the beginning of last year and my buddy (well call him 'E) worked as a baker at this local grocery store >This grocery store hires a bunch of tards from local high schools for co-op programs >E works with them consistently >One day get a text out of the blue > "GOOD GOD NO" >W-- is wrong dude? >Apparently E took his break and went for his mid day dump >Halfway through his business, when all of a sudden BOOM >The door to the bathroom is kicked in and there is a low mumbling coming from someone >This someone picks the stall right beside E >For a couple of second everything returns to normal other than some indiscernible mumbling > Then the tard releases a sky tearing screech that nearly knocks E off his seat in surprise >E decides that now is probably a good time to gtfo and quick >Alas, E is immobilized by his crap >Tries to finish quickly when suddenly a wet slapping sound echoes from the stall beside him >SWEET RAPTOR JESUS NO >The guy is fapping in the stall beside him >E gets out of there as quickly as possible and is finishing his lunch break when this Tard with Down syndrome emerges from the bathroom with j--- all over the front of his shirt >Doesn' t clean up and goes back to the deli to handle meats Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:34:04 No.615136318 22615136564 >615136170 >Later that week get another text from E IT WAS WORSE THIS TIME >Apparently the Fap Bandit has followed E up on his break this time. E tried to hold it in but it was not meant to be >Gave in to the need and tried to take the fastest dump of his life >Halfway through, the Fap Bandit returns >BOOM door kicked open, the mumbling resumes and he picks the stall right beside E >Ohno >E rushes to finish >The shriek that announces the reign of terror bellows out into the bathroom >E, in an ill fated attempt at trying to ignore it all looks at the shiny, polished floor >Sees a reflection, for whatever reason tries to discern it >It's a full view of the Fap Bandit pumping his potato >They lock eyes >ohcrap.jpg >Fap Bandit shrieks and uses his free hand to slam the side of the stall walls >E Finishes, gets out, and goes right back to work >Continues to work for about an hour, then notices the Fap Bandit in the deli. His black shirt had whitish stains on it >Fap Bandit smiles at him >E Takes rest of the day off Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:35:53 No.615136564 P> >Ok so it's been about a month since the last incident >The schools in the area have changed semesters so there's a new rotation except for the kids in full year co-op >The Fap Bandit is in full year co-op. Even worse, it seems as though he has recruited a bunch of his tard friends t turns out the Fap Bandit would follow E whenever he went to the bathroom, so E stopped taking dumps at work. >Unfortunately, he had Mexican food the night before >E rushes to the bathroom >Then it happens >BOOM the door kicked in as usual >This time there is a chorus of cacophonous tards forming a herd >W-- >The Fap Bandit had brought every available tard with him >The Fap Bandit sits in one stall beside him, another one on the other side and one is standing in front of his stall >Fap Bandit shrieks sets off the other tards >They start slamming on the walls of the stalls as the Fap Bandit is slapping the potato >E gets out of there and full on bodychecks the retard in front of his stall >Other employees in the breakroom horrified by the sound >E complains to the owner of the store whom he knows wel >Tards have to be escorted to the bathroom by Managers or someone >And so ended the reign of terror set forth by the Fap Bandit

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Retardation vs. PTSD

Anonymous 10/31/13(Thu)19:11:53 No.513691304 I witnessed the most horrific Tard event. >Be in school walking down crowded corridor >Spot tard holding sandwich 214 KB PNG >This tard is known for flipping out violently and a wrangler is nowhere to be seen >Suddenly, amongst the crowd, someone bumps into the tard and knocks his sandwich out his hand >A slice of ham lands on some quiet kid who is by his locker ohgodno.avi >Like the horns of Jericho, the tard lets out noise that could bring down the walls of a fortress >He leaps on the quiet kid and tackles him to the ground, eyes glazed over in feral rage ohshitnigger.jpg >The tard sinks his teeth into this kid's upper thigh, but somehow still roaring little did I know, thta the quiet kid was suffering from PTSD from a violent dog attack >He flips his s--- and unleashes an epic 45-hit fist combo into the tards face >As the punches keep landing, the tard's face is slowly becoming mushier and redder The tard increases his bite strengh and his growl grows louder >The quiet kid is now bawling his eyes out but he doesn't cease his furious punching >Blood is beginning to be splattered about the hall from the tard's face >the bite mark is now flowing freely with blood as well like lightning, the quiet kid grabs the tard's forehead with one hand and right hooks him in the jaw with the other. audiblecrack.mp3 >the tard flops off the kid and begins writing on the floor, smearing blood and saliva everywhere the quiet kid looks at his bloodsoaked fists, pukes and passes out (probably from the pain of the bite) >MFW he broke a tard's jaw to free himself MFW the hallway looks like the f------ somme MFW at least 10 kids had to have counselling after seeing this Also, Tard stories general
Anonymous 10/31/13(Thu)19:11:53 No.513691304 I witnessed the most horrific Tard event. >Be in school walking down crowded corridor >Spot tard holding sandwich 214 KB PNG >This tard is known for flipping out violently and a wrangler is nowhere to be seen >Suddenly, amongst the crowd, someone bumps into the tard and knocks his sandwich out his hand >A slice of ham lands on some quiet kid who is by his locker ohgodno.avi >Like the horns of Jericho, the tard lets out noise that could bring down the walls of a fortress >He leaps on the quiet kid and tackles him to the ground, eyes glazed over in feral rage ohshitnigger.jpg >The tard sinks his teeth into this kid's upper thigh, but somehow still roaring little did I know, thta the quiet kid was suffering from PTSD from a violent dog attack >He flips his s--- and unleashes an epic 45-hit fist combo into the tards face >As the punches keep landing, the tard's face is slowly becoming mushier and redder The tard increases his bite strengh and his growl grows louder >The quiet kid is now bawling his eyes out but he doesn't cease his furious punching >Blood is beginning to be splattered about the hall from the tard's face >the bite mark is now flowing freely with blood as well like lightning, the quiet kid grabs the tard's forehead with one hand and right hooks him in the jaw with the other. audiblecrack.mp3 >the tard flops off the kid and begins writing on the floor, smearing blood and saliva everywhere the quiet kid looks at his bloodsoaked fists, pukes and passes out (probably from the pain of the bite) >MFW he broke a tard's jaw to free himself MFW the hallway looks like the f------ somme MFW at least 10 kids had to have counselling after seeing this Also, Tard stories general

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ARE YOU OKAY?

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:21:26 No.615134651 >Grade 8 >Walking to the bathroom >Tard wrangler standing outsite the toilet area >"Hey anon, adam is in there, try not to bother him >Alright >Walk in, see adam pacing around in a huff >Pull up to the urinal, start to pee >Adam stares into the gap between my arm and the urinal >"Adam thats not okay, seriously, just go" >l forget adam can only say either "are you okay" and "am I okay" >"Are you okay" >"Yes, adam! Just stop looking at my noodle!" I zip up >He is angry I yelled >He storms around the bathroom making the sound of a rusty shopping cart wheel >"ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU OKAY" >thisistheend.png >Hops up onto the sink >Craps a bit >Hops down, finishes the rest of his dump on the floor "AM I OKAY AM I OKAY AMI OKAY" >Tard wrangler hears commotion >Walks in, sees him and I and the mess "ANON WHA-" >Adam throws a rock at her >wat.jpg >Throws a handful of playground pebbles at her >She has her faced turned into a corner >He dumps a bunch of big rocks into the urinals Runs out of the bathroom >Hits there stairs and falls down them colliding with the resident black guy >"DUDE WHAT THE HELL" >Realizes its adam, smeared in feces >Takes off >Im walking back to class >Hear the vice principal talking to adam ARE YOU OKAY AM I OKAY ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU ARE YOU ARE
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)14:21:26 No.615134651 >Grade 8 >Walking to the bathroom >Tard wrangler standing outsite the toilet area >"Hey anon, adam is in there, try not to bother him >Alright >Walk in, see adam pacing around in a huff >Pull up to the urinal, start to pee >Adam stares into the gap between my arm and the urinal >"Adam thats not okay, seriously, just go" >l forget adam can only say either "are you okay" and "am I okay" >"Are you okay" >"Yes, adam! Just stop looking at my noodle!" I zip up >He is angry I yelled >He storms around the bathroom making the sound of a rusty shopping cart wheel >"ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU OKAY" >thisistheend.png >Hops up onto the sink >Craps a bit >Hops down, finishes the rest of his dump on the floor "AM I OKAY AM I OKAY AMI OKAY" >Tard wrangler hears commotion >Walks in, sees him and I and the mess "ANON WHA-" >Adam throws a rock at her >wat.jpg >Throws a handful of playground pebbles at her >She has her faced turned into a corner >He dumps a bunch of big rocks into the urinals Runs out of the bathroom >Hits there stairs and falls down them colliding with the resident black guy >"DUDE WHAT THE HELL" >Realizes its adam, smeared in feces >Takes off >Im walking back to class >Hear the vice principal talking to adam ARE YOU OKAY AM I OKAY ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU ARE YOU ARE

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How could square danceing possibly go wrong?

Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:17:39 No.61 5126363、2-615133327 >Be me junior in high school > last day > make bet with friend that if I wear a thong to the last day of school hell give me $50 > come t > first block goes smoothly except for a serious weggie > 2nd block gym oh crap > realizing the thongs outline is clearly visible through the shorts I decide to go European style > no underwear >we start the class by stretching which I find out is pretty easy with mah ding-iling flopen around >Next we have square dancing > oh come one > I try to leave the gym but am stopped by the PE teacher who pairs me with a tard >oh god why > this tard is a whale > we start dancing and I'm trying 10 fight the urge of puking due to the smell this tard is emitting >she then accidently grazes her hand on my crotch >she takes a step back and looks at me with wide eyes o school wearing pink thong RUNEKED in thick tard dialect > wut > UR NEKED she starts to scream oh no > people begin to stare as she begins to scream the same words in a tard rage > HESA NEKKED! > at this moment the female PE teacher try to stop her > The tard then pushes the PE teacher to the ground and rushes towards the nearest exit > Since the tard being a tard didn't realize the door was locked she begins banging on it with all her might > at this tirne the security are in the gym > once she's corned her screams again HESA NEKKED > the security then restrain her and escort her out of the gym > while she's struggling to get away she screams in the language of her people >XERDCFGBYUGNURFEDIOHBJMIOESNMBIOFERMAGGIREZHJGJNE > that's the last time anyone saw her I barely got questioned about why she was screaming and still got the 50S
Anonymous 05/11/15(Mon)13:17:39 No.61 5126363、2-615133327 >Be me junior in high school > last day > make bet with friend that if I wear a thong to the last day of school hell give me $50 > come t > first block goes smoothly except for a serious weggie > 2nd block gym oh crap > realizing the thongs outline is clearly visible through the shorts I decide to go European style > no underwear >we start the class by stretching which I find out is pretty easy with mah ding-iling flopen around >Next we have square dancing > oh come one > I try to leave the gym but am stopped by the PE teacher who pairs me with a tard >oh god why > this tard is a whale > we start dancing and I'm trying 10 fight the urge of puking due to the smell this tard is emitting >she then accidently grazes her hand on my crotch >she takes a step back and looks at me with wide eyes o school wearing pink thong RUNEKED in thick tard dialect > wut > UR NEKED she starts to scream oh no > people begin to stare as she begins to scream the same words in a tard rage > HESA NEKKED! > at this moment the female PE teacher try to stop her > The tard then pushes the PE teacher to the ground and rushes towards the nearest exit > Since the tard being a tard didn't realize the door was locked she begins banging on it with all her might > at this tirne the security are in the gym > once she's corned her screams again HESA NEKKED > the security then restrain her and escort her out of the gym > while she's struggling to get away she screams in the language of her people >XERDCFGBYUGNURFEDIOHBJMIOESNMBIOFERMAGGIREZHJGJNE > that's the last time anyone saw her I barely got questioned about why she was screaming and still got the 50S

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electric sharpener + grease pencil = ???

>In middle school >There is an autistic kid in history class, not full retard but still pretty slow >Get chosen by teacher to help him with a worksheet >F------ great >I tell him every answer so he can copy it on his paper >He decides to use a grease pencil that he stole from the science lab instead of a regular one >He says "Anon I gotta sharpen my pencil" >I tell him it won't work >He doesn't listen >Walks up to front of classroom >Shoves grease pencil into electric sharpener >It gets mucked up instantly and breaks >Retard screams EEEGAAAAAAHHHH and throws pencil sharpener on floor >Rips off his jacket, throws in the air >Runs out of classroom, screaming down the hallway >Teacher instantly dashes out of room, yelling "SOMEBODY HELLLLLPPP! HE'S LOOSE!!!" >Everyone is completely silent, listening to the chaos unfolding outside >Whole class looks at me, friend says "Anon, what did you do?!" >Shrug >Everyone lol'd
>In middle school >There is an autistic kid in history class, not full retard but still pretty slow >Get chosen by teacher to help him with a worksheet >F------ great >I tell him every answer so he can copy it on his paper >He decides to use a grease pencil that he stole from the science lab instead of a regular one >He says "Anon I gotta sharpen my pencil" >I tell him it won't work >He doesn't listen >Walks up to front of classroom >Shoves grease pencil into electric sharpener >It gets mucked up instantly and breaks >Retard screams EEEGAAAAAAHHHH and throws pencil sharpener on floor >Rips off his jacket, throws in the air >Runs out of classroom, screaming down the hallway >Teacher instantly dashes out of room, yelling "SOMEBODY HELLLLLPPP! HE'S LOOSE!!!" >Everyone is completely silent, listening to the chaos unfolding outside >Whole class looks at me, friend says "Anon, what did you do?!" >Shrug >Everyone lol'd

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