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anon has 200iq | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous 05/21/17(Sun)14:36:47 No.733287790 >go on akinator akmatur >say yes when asked if your character is a p----star >answer in accordance to what you want your p----star to look like >akinator gives you a hand-picked p----star to fit your preferences 14 KB JPG >profit
| Anonymous 05/21/17(Sun)14:36:47 No.733287790 >go on akinator akmatur >say yes when asked if your character is a p----star >answer in accordance to what you want your p----star to look like >akinator gives you a hand-picked p----star to fit your preferences 14 KB JPG >profit

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Anon is fast as heck boiiiii | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/17/13(Fri)15:28 No.12646957 One time I perpetrated a reality glitch on my gf. >Be in college >Walk gf to bus stop that takes her to the building her classroom is in. (It's a big college.) >She gets on bus. >i start sprinting towards a bike I had placed hours earlier at a bike rack. >Look behind me as I ride away, bus doesn't leave until about 30 seconds after I take off. >Make it to the building (1 mile from where I started) >Quickly lock bike up and go just inside the doorway of the building. >See bus approaching. >Walk outside >Just happen to run into gf >Say hey, what's up? >She is visibly shaken, and asks how I got here. >l explain that I had to use the building's computer lab after class and was just leaving. >She says she was just talking to me 3 minutes ago. >l just roll my eyes, chuckle and walk away. >Later learn she had a panic attack and threw up in the bathroom. >I haven't told her what really happened to this day.
Anonymous 05/17/13(Fri)15:28 No.12646957 One time I perpetrated a reality glitch on my gf. >Be in college >Walk gf to bus stop that takes her to the building her classroom is in. (It's a big college.) >She gets on bus. >i start sprinting towards a bike I had placed hours earlier at a bike rack. >Look behind me as I ride away, bus doesn't leave until about 30 seconds after I take off. >Make it to the building (1 mile from where I started) >Quickly lock bike up and go just inside the doorway of the building. >See bus approaching. >Walk outside >Just happen to run into gf >Say hey, what's up? >She is visibly shaken, and asks how I got here. >l explain that I had to use the building's computer lab after class and was just leaving. >She says she was just talking to me 3 minutes ago. >l just roll my eyes, chuckle and walk away. >Later learn she had a panic attack and threw up in the bathroom. >I haven't told her what really happened to this day.

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Anon has found meaning | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/14/18(Mon)13:14:04 No.10598617 Uncrustables are the only thing keeping me alive at this point. This isn't a f------ joke every day I wake up, go to the same s----- school full of s----- people who ll think their better than one another, 49 KB PNG full of teachers who either don't want to be their either or hate you, spend time with people who don't like me and who I don't like, then go home, cry in the shower for an hour, then engage in a sorry attempt at studying, all for what? All for the f------ uncrustables, every day, twice a day, those absolute godsends of treats get me through my miserable f------ life, the sweetness of the jelly matched with the saltiness of the peanut butter, all on soft, round bread pockets. God isn't real, heaven isn't real, only uncrustables are real View Thread
: Anonymous 05/14/18(Mon)13:14:04 No.10598617 Uncrustables are the only thing keeping me alive at this point. This isn't a f------ joke every day I wake up, go to the same s----- school full of s----- people who ll think their better than one another, 49 KB PNG full of teachers who either don't want to be their either or hate you, spend time with people who don't like me and who I don't like, then go home, cry in the shower for an hour, then engage in a sorry attempt at studying, all for what? All for the f------ uncrustables, every day, twice a day, those absolute godsends of treats get me through my miserable f------ life, the sweetness of the jelly matched with the saltiness of the peanut butter, all on soft, round bread pockets. God isn't real, heaven isn't real, only uncrustables are real View Thread

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4chan just got ptsd | /r/Greentext

File: IMG_20210226_123453.png (731 KB, 820x591) O THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE Anony >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE
File: IMG_20210226_123453.png (731 KB, 820x591) O THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE Anony >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE >THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE THE TREES LOOK EVEN WORSE

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Anon can't find a dealer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)21:19:41 No.62508930 >trying to buy weed >finally get in contact with a dealer since people stopped being flakey/paranoid for 5 f------ minutes 148 KB JPG >buy two ounces from the guy >come back next week, buy two more ounces. >Two weeks pass >this week now. Ask him if he has anything else. >"Yeah, got stuff but you keep buying out my inventory... I can't sell more to you, bro." >mfw WHY NOT TAKE THE MONEY I GIVE YOU AND JUST ORDER MORE INVENTORY SO YOU MAKE A BIGGER PROFIT IF YOUR DEMAND IS THIS HIGH!? AAAAAAAAAAAAAGHGHGHGGH WHY ARE YOU CUTTING ME OUT!? It took me half a year just to get this f------ guy in my contacts, f--- f--- F--- why is it so hard to meet people to buy weed from this is STUPID.
: Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)21:19:41 No.62508930 >trying to buy weed >finally get in contact with a dealer since people stopped being flakey/paranoid for 5 f------ minutes 148 KB JPG >buy two ounces from the guy >come back next week, buy two more ounces. >Two weeks pass >this week now. Ask him if he has anything else. >"Yeah, got stuff but you keep buying out my inventory... I can't sell more to you, bro." >mfw WHY NOT TAKE THE MONEY I GIVE YOU AND JUST ORDER MORE INVENTORY SO YOU MAKE A BIGGER PROFIT IF YOUR DEMAND IS THIS HIGH!? AAAAAAAAAAAAAGHGHGHGGH WHY ARE YOU CUTTING ME OUT!? It took me half a year just to get this f------ guy in my contacts, f--- f--- F--- why is it so hard to meet people to buy weed from this is STUPID.

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Anon is satisfied | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 836589412 >be me >wanted to try greentexting >done
Anonymous | 836589412 >be me >wanted to try greentexting >done

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Anon recreates Auschwitz | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:06:13 No.62513700 >Be me on bus >Middle of winter so bus is heated to 90 degrees >Crammed full of people standing shoulder to shoulder >Feel a tummy grumble >Lean a bit to spread cheeks so no noise escapes >Nice and quiet >Know it's going to be RANK >First pasanger starts to notice and wrinkles her nose >Then 5 >Then 10 >People now gagging trying to get away from the smell >Join in the theatrics but secretly laughing as they all gag on my gas F----- turned that bus into an Auschwitz shower stall
: Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:06:13 No.62513700 >Be me on bus >Middle of winter so bus is heated to 90 degrees >Crammed full of people standing shoulder to shoulder >Feel a tummy grumble >Lean a bit to spread cheeks so no noise escapes >Nice and quiet >Know it's going to be RANK >First pasanger starts to notice and wrinkles her nose >Then 5 >Then 10 >People now gagging trying to get away from the smell >Join in the theatrics but secretly laughing as they all gag on my gas F----- turned that bus into an Auschwitz shower stall

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Anon is a mega chad | /r/Greentext

File: 19283746583.png (33 KB, 194x190) Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)06:05:43 No.846502047 >>846502131 >>846502190 >>846502247 >>846502251 >be me >girl asked me to come over >i am shaking with nerves >never kissed a girl before >tell her i can't come i have a clan meeting on my online multiplayer 20 year old roleplay clicking game >she pretends to be sad >messages another guy >phew >i am not part of any clans in my game >too scared they will ask me to voice chat >feel alpha that i lied to her and she believed me >feel beta because i lied to her and she believed me >feel like a loser Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)06:06:12 No.846502078 >>846502328 OP, you are a mega-autist Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)06:07:18 No.846502131 >>846502047 (OP) Doomed forever if thats how youre gonna be Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)06:09:18 No.846502247 >>846502297 >>846502914 >>846502047 (OP) This is where we're at chaps, the typical white male. This is as good as it gets now. It's been fun.
File: 19283746583.png (33 KB, 194x190) Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)06:05:43 No.846502047 >>846502131 >>846502190 >>846502247 >>846502251 >be me >girl asked me to come over >i am shaking with nerves >never kissed a girl before >tell her i can't come i have a clan meeting on my online multiplayer 20 year old roleplay clicking game >she pretends to be sad >messages another guy >phew >i am not part of any clans in my game >too scared they will ask me to voice chat >feel alpha that i lied to her and she believed me >feel beta because i lied to her and she believed me >feel like a loser Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)06:06:12 No.846502078 >>846502328 OP, you are a mega-autist Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)06:07:18 No.846502131 >>846502047 (OP) Doomed forever if thats how youre gonna be Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)06:09:18 No.846502247 >>846502297 >>846502914 >>846502047 (OP) This is where we're at chaps, the typical white male. This is as good as it gets now. It's been fun.

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anon suffers in brit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/07/21(Sun)02:50:19 No.62211469 >be me >britbong >lose my walking license >need to go the shop for cigarettes >decide to risk it 48 KB JPG >trying to speed walk so I don't get caught >copper legit turns the corner right in front of me >asks why i'm walking so quickly >asks to see my walking license >explain that l've lost it >immediate 200 quid fine >f--- >get to the shop >door only opens using a door license >f--- >l forgot it >beg the guy behind the counter to let me in >he does >get in the queue >luckily I remembered my queuing license >get to the front of the queue >ask for the cigs >he asks for my c-------- license >hand it to him >It's expired >f--- f--- f--- >get fined another 200 quid for swearing without my profanity license I f------ hate this country. 1 Reply View Thread
: Anonymous 02/07/21(Sun)02:50:19 No.62211469 >be me >britbong >lose my walking license >need to go the shop for cigarettes >decide to risk it 48 KB JPG >trying to speed walk so I don't get caught >copper legit turns the corner right in front of me >asks why i'm walking so quickly >asks to see my walking license >explain that l've lost it >immediate 200 quid fine >f--- >get to the shop >door only opens using a door license >f--- >l forgot it >beg the guy behind the counter to let me in >he does >get in the queue >luckily I remembered my queuing license >get to the front of the queue >ask for the cigs >he asks for my c-------- license >hand it to him >It's expired >f--- f--- f--- >get fined another 200 quid for swearing without my profanity license I f------ hate this country. 1 Reply View Thread

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Anon has a good dad | /r/Greentext

File: flat, 750x,075,Épad.750x1(..).jpg (146 KB, 750x1000) O Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)11:36:11 No.848339669 [Reply] > >>848340859 >>848341296 >be me >15 yo fat f--- with no gf >dad called a fat f--- >got rekt >can do nothing >start to hit the gym and do exercise >ffw a few months later >my body changed a lot, bigger chest and bicep, my abs is revealed >show it to my dad >"wow anon this is good, you look better than me back then, keep working on" >"remember when you still shorter than me ?" >we both laughed >thank dad for supporting me to improve myself and I f------ love you dad >pic related 3 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view.
File: flat, 750x,075,Épad.750x1(..).jpg (146 KB, 750x1000) O Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)11:36:11 No.848339669 [Reply] > >>848340859 >>848341296 >be me >15 yo fat f--- with no gf >dad called a fat f--- >got rekt >can do nothing >start to hit the gym and do exercise >ffw a few months later >my body changed a lot, bigger chest and bicep, my abs is revealed >show it to my dad >"wow anon this is good, you look better than me back then, keep working on" >"remember when you still shorter than me ?" >we both laughed >thank dad for supporting me to improve myself and I f------ love you dad >pic related 3 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view.

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Anon joins a furry gang | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: MOqSTCCC) 01/17/17(Tue)11:33:57 No.107429717 >Start dating girl >Find out she's a f------ furry >But she's a solid 8.5/10 >Furry community is actually not that bad, but once they don their outfits I gag 298 KB JPG a little >Find out they want me to go through a trial to join their little group of friends which involves fist fighting with 15 people to gain "Alpha" status in the pack >At the end, besides Alpha status, one of the girls can be chosen for a sexual reward (not going to happen anyway because I'm dating one of these f------ furries) >Find out they've beat the f--- out of people on multiple occasions When in the f--- did furries start turning into gangs? I mean, I guess I wouldn't mind socking a couple of these retards, but still, what the f---? Is my willingness to even participate the first sign of mental illness? >>107430205 # >>107430206 # >>107430209 # >>107430254 # 107420296 # 107420322 # 107420490 107420579 #
: Anonymous (ID: MOqSTCCC) 01/17/17(Tue)11:33:57 No.107429717 >Start dating girl >Find out she's a f------ furry >But she's a solid 8.5/10 >Furry community is actually not that bad, but once they don their outfits I gag 298 KB JPG a little >Find out they want me to go through a trial to join their little group of friends which involves fist fighting with 15 people to gain "Alpha" status in the pack >At the end, besides Alpha status, one of the girls can be chosen for a sexual reward (not going to happen anyway because I'm dating one of these f------ furries) >Find out they've beat the f--- out of people on multiple occasions When in the f--- did furries start turning into gangs? I mean, I guess I wouldn't mind socking a couple of these retards, but still, what the f---? Is my willingness to even participate the first sign of mental illness? >>107430205 # >>107430206 # >>107430209 # >>107430254 # 107420296 # 107420322 # 107420490 107420579 #

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Anon's daughter is 8 years old today | /r/Greentext

I Anonymous 12/04/16(Sun)00:19:20 No.359600273 >359600448 >>359600491 >>359600539 >>359600560 >>359600601 >>359600602 >>359600625 >>359600764 File: Spoiler Image (82 KB, 528x960) >>359599614 Its not much of a story anon ill give you the quick green txt version. >Be about 6 yrs ago >Meet a grill on FB >We hit it off and date >Few months into it she gets pregnant >We decide on adoption >Fast forward to delivery day >As my daughter is born I decide I cant/wolnt give her away >Baby momma tells me she doesnt want her and if I want to keep her its all on me >I say alright take the child and move back in with family >Raise the child for 4 years on my own with no help from her mother >My family helps out here and there >Finally save up enough to get a place for us and pay rent a year in advance >We move into a one bedroom >She gets the bedroom I sleep on the pullout >She is 5 now her bday is on the 17th >lve worked as much as I can so she will have stuff for her bday and christmas >pic related its last xmas
I Anonymous 12/04/16(Sun)00:19:20 No.359600273 >359600448 >>359600491 >>359600539 >>359600560 >>359600601 >>359600602 >>359600625 >>359600764 File: Spoiler Image (82 KB, 528x960) >>359599614 Its not much of a story anon ill give you the quick green txt version. >Be about 6 yrs ago >Meet a grill on FB >We hit it off and date >Few months into it she gets pregnant >We decide on adoption >Fast forward to delivery day >As my daughter is born I decide I cant/wolnt give her away >Baby momma tells me she doesnt want her and if I want to keep her its all on me >I say alright take the child and move back in with family >Raise the child for 4 years on my own with no help from her mother >My family helps out here and there >Finally save up enough to get a place for us and pay rent a year in advance >We move into a one bedroom >She gets the bedroom I sleep on the pullout >She is 5 now her bday is on the 17th >lve worked as much as I can so she will have stuff for her bday and christmas >pic related its last xmas

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Anon hates his life | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1 hour ago 47758382 : >Be furry artist >Make about 250 dollars each commission and it takes me 3 days to do one. >Patreon is getting me over 4k a month just to post my commissions there. >Not even that well known yet. >Vommit about 5-6 times while making each commission because I find furries f------ disgusting. >Get some really f------ disgusting commissions like tigers s------- on the heads of wolf men while a horse masturbates in the corner. Charged over 500 dollars for that and the guy actually f------ paid upfront. >lf I do regular art I won't even make a 1/5 of what I am currently making. >Can't handle real jobs I hate my life. 2 REPLIES
Anonymous 1 hour ago 47758382 : >Be furry artist >Make about 250 dollars each commission and it takes me 3 days to do one. >Patreon is getting me over 4k a month just to post my commissions there. >Not even that well known yet. >Vommit about 5-6 times while making each commission because I find furries f------ disgusting. >Get some really f------ disgusting commissions like tigers s------- on the heads of wolf men while a horse masturbates in the corner. Charged over 500 dollars for that and the guy actually f------ paid upfront. >lf I do regular art I won't even make a 1/5 of what I am currently making. >Can't handle real jobs I hate my life. 2 REPLIES

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Anon doesn’t like women in his lobby | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: NHQe9yHf Women in Gaming 02/26/21(Fri)07:08:52 No.309805388 9 ameststtry >Woman bottom fragging >Being an attention w---- >'accidentally' walking into fire >constantly has to announce her location >Can't communicate any positions effectively because the team's portable n----- has to keep interjecting "Trolling inhabits a grey zone between freedom of speech and anonymous attacks. Many women journalists, including myself, have tn deal with the consequences on our own wh man ames 122 KB JPG >Gets called out for being a parasite and bottom fragging >Tries to vote kick person who called her out >Vote fails, barely >Starts trying to socially divide the team into 2 infighting groups like some sort of jew >...but keeps getting called out >More of the team has begun to hate her >Futilely vote kicking (and failing) at every possible opportunity >Team begins s------- all over roastie >Entire team calls her out for bottom fragging >Roastie refuses to change her behavior >Roastie refuses to try harder >Keeps trying to cause infighting >Team kicks her >Writes an article about all of the anonymous attacks she faces daily >Blames a toxic, sexist gaming culture >Article is used to rapidly increase moderation and causes an influx of retards >Kills the game because she couldn't be a parasite and didn't want to put in effort (sounds like IRL) MEANWHILE >New guy fils the hole roastie left >Gets called a bottom fragger 'I bottom fragged ur mum last nite c---' >000000000ooh >Game moves on
: Anonymous (ID: NHQe9yHf Women in Gaming 02/26/21(Fri)07:08:52 No.309805388 9 ameststtry >Woman bottom fragging >Being an attention w---- >'accidentally' walking into fire >constantly has to announce her location >Can't communicate any positions effectively because the team's portable n----- has to keep interjecting "Trolling inhabits a grey zone between freedom of speech and anonymous attacks. Many women journalists, including myself, have tn deal with the consequences on our own wh man ames 122 KB JPG >Gets called out for being a parasite and bottom fragging >Tries to vote kick person who called her out >Vote fails, barely >Starts trying to socially divide the team into 2 infighting groups like some sort of jew >...but keeps getting called out >More of the team has begun to hate her >Futilely vote kicking (and failing) at every possible opportunity >Team begins s------- all over roastie >Entire team calls her out for bottom fragging >Roastie refuses to change her behavior >Roastie refuses to try harder >Keeps trying to cause infighting >Team kicks her >Writes an article about all of the anonymous attacks she faces daily >Blames a toxic, sexist gaming culture >Article is used to rapidly increase moderation and causes an influx of retards >Kills the game because she couldn't be a parasite and didn't want to put in effort (sounds like IRL) MEANWHILE >New guy fils the hole roastie left >Gets called a bottom fragger 'I bottom fragged ur mum last nite c---' >000000000ooh >Game moves on

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Anon visits India | /r/Greentext

>be me >finishing last year of med school >hardest thing I've ever done in my life Psuper intense studies never really had time for social life or grills >last day of class 445 KB JPG >all the disciplines gathers for final summit >meet random Indian girl >pretty hot for a street s------ >smalltalk.mp3 >she invites me to end of the year party at friends house >f--- it why not >arrive at party >full of chad and becky medfags so party is boring as f--- >think about leaving >finally spot the poopy qt >she's actually really interesting >end up talking about vidyas and music all night >eventually tells me her parents still live in some slum back in India >parents gave everything to get her to school >sadviolin.wav >fast forward a month >finally graduated >grill and I have getting more serious >we are both looking for a residency at any hospital that will take us >entire process is exhausting >India gt telis me she is going home to visit her parents >asks me to go with her >never been abroad and need a break from jab search >decide to go with cont. >Airlndia.gif >inside of the plane smelis like a curry dumpster >finally make it to New Delhi >parents live an hour car ride outside of the city >landscape getting increasingly s----- >see people literally s------- in the streets >wild dogs everywhere >get to parents house >mudhut with no windows >qt keeps apologizing for the slum horror >introduce myself to the parents >typical India npc's but super nice >mom starts cooking dinner >dad constantly swearing and chasing off dogs that try to come in the house while mom cooks >tells me the dogs are huge problem >tells me locals round up and kill the femalo dogs to stop them from breeding >grossed if out but shrug it of >mom announces dinner is ready >never had authentic Indian food so I'm f------ stoked >mfw the mom brings out an actual lasagna >mom sees l'm stunned and confused >"oh, anon, my daughter told me you're Italian' >i'm sicilian but ok >don't want to be rude >to my shock the lasagna is actually incredible >mom explains how difficult it was to find the ingredients >l ask what kind of meat she used >"oh it's from last nights dog slaughter" >excusemewhatthefuck.jpeg >mfw I'm eating street dog >mfw I'm eating dog lasagna >mfw I realize l'm literally eating bitch lasagna >bitch lasagna >T-series ain't nothin but a bitch lasagna
>be me >finishing last year of med school >hardest thing I've ever done in my life Psuper intense studies never really had time for social life or grills >last day of class 445 KB JPG >all the disciplines gathers for final summit >meet random Indian girl >pretty hot for a street s------ >smalltalk.mp3 >she invites me to end of the year party at friends house >f--- it why not >arrive at party >full of chad and becky medfags so party is boring as f--- >think about leaving >finally spot the poopy qt >she's actually really interesting >end up talking about vidyas and music all night >eventually tells me her parents still live in some slum back in India >parents gave everything to get her to school >sadviolin.wav >fast forward a month >finally graduated >grill and I have getting more serious >we are both looking for a residency at any hospital that will take us >entire process is exhausting >India gt telis me she is going home to visit her parents >asks me to go with her >never been abroad and need a break from jab search >decide to go with cont. >Airlndia.gif >inside of the plane smelis like a curry dumpster >finally make it to New Delhi >parents live an hour car ride outside of the city >landscape getting increasingly s----- >see people literally s------- in the streets >wild dogs everywhere >get to parents house >mudhut with no windows >qt keeps apologizing for the slum horror >introduce myself to the parents >typical India npc's but super nice >mom starts cooking dinner >dad constantly swearing and chasing off dogs that try to come in the house while mom cooks >tells me the dogs are huge problem >tells me locals round up and kill the femalo dogs to stop them from breeding >grossed if out but shrug it of >mom announces dinner is ready >never had authentic Indian food so I'm f------ stoked >mfw the mom brings out an actual lasagna >mom sees l'm stunned and confused >"oh, anon, my daughter told me you're Italian' >i'm sicilian but ok >don't want to be rude >to my shock the lasagna is actually incredible >mom explains how difficult it was to find the ingredients >l ask what kind of meat she used >"oh it's from last nights dog slaughter" >excusemewhatthefuck.jpeg >mfw I'm eating street dog >mfw I'm eating dog lasagna >mfw I realize l'm literally eating bitch lasagna >bitch lasagna >T-series ain't nothin but a bitch lasagna

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Anon goes full retard | /r/Greentext

File: aB0qBz1_700b jpg (100 KB, 700x2497) Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)11:53:56 No.845374686 ► >>845374748 >>845374776 >>845374789 >845374833 >>845374904 I fuckeda trap and regret it >meet fren from discord >we live near eachother >hes a trap >we get super close and start meeting up >one night we start drinking >one thing leads to another and we're getting handsy >he goes to the bathroom to "prep" >he comes back, im diamonds >l slide my d--- in >feels like a ring around my d--- >eh it feels ok for me >Start pounding away no wrap >hes moaning >pull out my d--- >LITERAL WATERY S--- ON MY C--- >S--- has mixed with the Lube and is now leaking out of His ass >it fills the room with a Strong smell of S---- >He leaked poop all over my bed >l run to the bathroom to vomit >"PUKE" >my d--- is still semi hard >look down at it >'oh my f------ god" >tiny small bits of white string on my d--- >Tiny small bits of White String moving ALL OVER MY D--- >kicked that mentally ill freak out of my Flat >spend 3 hours in the shower I Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)11:56:55 No.845374776 >845374686 (OP) Ha. You got ass worms on your pp
File: aB0qBz1_700b jpg (100 KB, 700x2497) Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)11:53:56 No.845374686 ► >>845374748 >>845374776 >>845374789 >845374833 >>845374904 I fuckeda trap and regret it >meet fren from discord >we live near eachother >hes a trap >we get super close and start meeting up >one night we start drinking >one thing leads to another and we're getting handsy >he goes to the bathroom to "prep" >he comes back, im diamonds >l slide my d--- in >feels like a ring around my d--- >eh it feels ok for me >Start pounding away no wrap >hes moaning >pull out my d--- >LITERAL WATERY S--- ON MY C--- >S--- has mixed with the Lube and is now leaking out of His ass >it fills the room with a Strong smell of S---- >He leaked poop all over my bed >l run to the bathroom to vomit >"PUKE" >my d--- is still semi hard >look down at it >'oh my f------ god" >tiny small bits of white string on my d--- >Tiny small bits of White String moving ALL OVER MY D--- >kicked that mentally ill freak out of my Flat >spend 3 hours in the shower I Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)11:56:55 No.845374776 >845374686 (OP) Ha. You got ass worms on your pp

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Anon attends movie night | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 02/21/21(Sun)04:56:36 No.146940005 >>146942542 >>146940402 >zoomers will never know the feeling of going to a friends house to watch a movie, finding a black tape in the VCR that turned out to be his parents sex tape we hid it for later viewing and both jacked off. I called him a for jacking off to his own parents but I was wrong to do it. Daniel, if you are reading this I'm sorry. If you still have the tape I really would like to see your mom's t--- again.
O Anonymous 02/21/21(Sun)04:56:36 No.146940005 >>146942542 >>146940402 >zoomers will never know the feeling of going to a friends house to watch a movie, finding a black tape in the VCR that turned out to be his parents sex tape we hid it for later viewing and both jacked off. I called him a for jacking off to his own parents but I was wrong to do it. Daniel, if you are reading this I'm sorry. If you still have the tape I really would like to see your mom's t--- again.

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Anon joins the Army | /r/Greentext

>Be me in army >mandatory in my s----- country >first time we noob soldiers fire our guns >we lay in the ground and get ready 108 KB JPG >drill instructor yells "are you ready?" >i yell back "ai ai captain" >random guy two rows away yells "i cant hear you" >drill instructor mad and tries to find out who mocked him >i yell again "O0000000" >random guy shots a rock 10 meters in front of him from laughter ( the target was 300 meter away) >dust rises up and one general runs and screams at drill instructor >we march back to camp 10 kilometers instead of driving >i am attending the "i cant hear you" guy wedding next week
>Be me in army >mandatory in my s----- country >first time we noob soldiers fire our guns >we lay in the ground and get ready 108 KB JPG >drill instructor yells "are you ready?" >i yell back "ai ai captain" >random guy two rows away yells "i cant hear you" >drill instructor mad and tries to find out who mocked him >i yell again "O0000000" >random guy shots a rock 10 meters in front of him from laughter ( the target was 300 meter away) >dust rises up and one general runs and screams at drill instructor >we march back to camp 10 kilometers instead of driving >i am attending the "i cant hear you" guy wedding next week

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Anon is the fresh prince of Zaire | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)23:25:31 No.848330977 >In west Somalia born and raised, in the jungle is whereI spend most of my days, skinnying out minimising, starving all cool, shootin up sailors outside of the school, when a couple of guys who were up to no good, started spreading ebola to my neighbourhood, I got one little cough and my mom got scared and said “you're moving to your 7 KB JPG aunties and uncles in Zaire" >l whistled for a dear and when it came near the dear wasn't fresh and had lice in its ear, if anything I can say this dear was rare but but I thought Allah forget it, yo homes to Zaire. >l pulled, up to the shack about 7 or 8 and yelled to the dear yo homes smell you later, looked at my kingdom I was finally there, to sit on my throne as the prince of Zaire
: Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)23:25:31 No.848330977 >In west Somalia born and raised, in the jungle is whereI spend most of my days, skinnying out minimising, starving all cool, shootin up sailors outside of the school, when a couple of guys who were up to no good, started spreading ebola to my neighbourhood, I got one little cough and my mom got scared and said “you're moving to your 7 KB JPG aunties and uncles in Zaire" >l whistled for a dear and when it came near the dear wasn't fresh and had lice in its ear, if anything I can say this dear was rare but but I thought Allah forget it, yo homes to Zaire. >l pulled, up to the shack about 7 or 8 and yelled to the dear yo homes smell you later, looked at my kingdom I was finally there, to sit on my throne as the prince of Zaire

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Anon found his sister's diary | /r/Greentext

File: 1283774452.png (221 KB, 274x427) Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)14:46:00 No.848334377 >>848334688 >>848334909 NSONAN my sister died and i found her diary, how much would it cost to publish it as a book for simps to read or should i just chuck it in the bin? Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)14:52:01 No.848334636 >>848335185 Scan the pages and upload them in as a slide show to youtube. You probably wouldn't make much money from publishing and the social ramifications could easily outway the profits. Uploading to youtube could probably earn a little bit of change in ads and you could also keep some anonymity if done right. Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)14:53:28 No.848334688 >>848335185 >>848334377 (OP) post some highlights here Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)14:56:59 No.848334837 ► >>848335185 How long is it? Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)14:58:46 No.848334909 >>848335185 >>848334377 (OP) If you're not trying to make money off it you can just scan the pages and upload it on the internet Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)15:04:29 No.848335185 File: 1298398398494..png (177 KB, 360x334) >>848335366 >>848335865 >>848335868 >>848334636 >>848334688 >>848334837 >>848334909 haha you guys fell for it, i don't even have a sister and all my other family is already dead lol Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)15:08:17 No.848335366 >>848335185 Well done you really tricked everyone! Have a lovely day and enjoy masturbating over this when you think about it later.
File: 1283774452.png (221 KB, 274x427) Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)14:46:00 No.848334377 >>848334688 >>848334909 NSONAN my sister died and i found her diary, how much would it cost to publish it as a book for simps to read or should i just chuck it in the bin? Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)14:52:01 No.848334636 >>848335185 Scan the pages and upload them in as a slide show to youtube. You probably wouldn't make much money from publishing and the social ramifications could easily outway the profits. Uploading to youtube could probably earn a little bit of change in ads and you could also keep some anonymity if done right. Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)14:53:28 No.848334688 >>848335185 >>848334377 (OP) post some highlights here Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)14:56:59 No.848334837 ► >>848335185 How long is it? Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)14:58:46 No.848334909 >>848335185 >>848334377 (OP) If you're not trying to make money off it you can just scan the pages and upload it on the internet Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)15:04:29 No.848335185 File: 1298398398494..png (177 KB, 360x334) >>848335366 >>848335865 >>848335868 >>848334636 >>848334688 >>848334837 >>848334909 haha you guys fell for it, i don't even have a sister and all my other family is already dead lol Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)15:08:17 No.848335366 >>848335185 Well done you really tricked everyone! Have a lovely day and enjoy masturbating over this when you think about it later.

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