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Anon wears a tank top | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Collected my first mire 03/08/21(Mon)16:56:08 No.6023951: >bust the tank tops out since it's 70 and sunny >take dog out for walk around city >pass by house where 3 kids and a mom are outside playing whiffle ball in front yard >kid points at me and says 55 KB JPG "mommy, there's a strong guy" >wave at him and say "thanks, man" >his mom apologizes and compliments my boxer >mfw the entire way home i might just make it, bros. i might just make it. 8 Replies / 2 Images View Thread
: Anonymous Collected my first mire 03/08/21(Mon)16:56:08 No.6023951: >bust the tank tops out since it's 70 and sunny >take dog out for walk around city >pass by house where 3 kids and a mom are outside playing whiffle ball in front yard >kid points at me and says 55 KB JPG "mommy, there's a strong guy" >wave at him and say "thanks, man" >his mom apologizes and compliments my boxer >mfw the entire way home i might just make it, bros. i might just make it. 8 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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It wasn’t just a meme? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: CYaRgWDp 4 07/28/17(Fri)08:3 >>135275894 >>135276090 >>135276165 >>135277069 >>135278 >>135286564 >>135286951 >>135289136 >>135289396 >>135290 >Brother is a history teacher for kids in 5th grade >Told me he brought up 9/11 to his class >Said kids went instantly insane >They didn't know it was real >One kid said he thought it was just a meme
Anonymous (ID: CYaRgWDp 4 07/28/17(Fri)08:3 >>135275894 >>135276090 >>135276165 >>135277069 >>135278 >>135286564 >>135286951 >>135289136 >>135289396 >>135290 >Brother is a history teacher for kids in 5th grade >Told me he brought up 9/11 to his class >Said kids went instantly insane >They didn't know it was real >One kid said he thought it was just a meme

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Anon can't get laid | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)20:03:03 No.60462916 I just had a girl over and once I took off my shirt, she quickly left. W-- is there something wrong with my body? 1.41 MB JPG 23 Replies /1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)20:30:25 No.6046322 >>60462916 (OP) # What was the context in which you took off your shirt? Were you two simply talking and you randomly took off your shirt? She probably thought you were about to r--- her >>60463291 # UTUUZLV TT >>60463132 # >Ask her if she wants to watch a movie >She says ok >Plug in hdmi into laptop >Begin movie >She starts cuddling with me >Take off shirt >l say "it's time" >Takes her purse and leaves
Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)20:03:03 No.60462916 I just had a girl over and once I took off my shirt, she quickly left. W-- is there something wrong with my body? 1.41 MB JPG 23 Replies /1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)20:30:25 No.6046322 >>60462916 (OP) # What was the context in which you took off your shirt? Were you two simply talking and you randomly took off your shirt? She probably thought you were about to r--- her >>60463291 # UTUUZLV TT >>60463132 # >Ask her if she wants to watch a movie >She says ok >Plug in hdmi into laptop >Begin movie >She starts cuddling with me >Take off shirt >l say "it's time" >Takes her purse and leaves

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Anon doesn't like redditors | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/21/21(Sun)13:31:17 No.62844206 I fluking hate redditors with a passion man > Me about a week ago > Feeling depressed, tell a story about my s----- prom experience where I hid at a Chick- fil- A all 25 KB JPG night > Next morning, see my f------ greentext at the top of my page on Reddit > Has like 5k karma, and all the comments are either failing to summon the f------ tendiebot or are asking about the anime wojack I used > You f------ are probably reading this on r/greentext right now f--- you
: Anonymous 03/21/21(Sun)13:31:17 No.62844206 I fluking hate redditors with a passion man > Me about a week ago > Feeling depressed, tell a story about my s----- prom experience where I hid at a Chick- fil- A all 25 KB JPG night > Next morning, see my f------ greentext at the top of my page on Reddit > Has like 5k karma, and all the comments are either failing to summon the f------ tendiebot or are asking about the anime wojack I used > You f------ are probably reading this on r/greentext right now f--- you

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anon has a rude step-dad | /r/Greentext

>be me >22 >did stupid s--- yesterday >step-dad found out today >called me a stupid n----- >tfw he is black too
>be me >22 >did stupid s--- yesterday >step-dad found out today >called me a stupid n----- >tfw he is black too

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Anon is in the army | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/21/21(Sun)09:39:46 No.850096958 > be me > be 19 year old army f-- > get real bored nothing to do in barracks > get horny > say “f--- it" and pull up p--- > Tomboys.webm > nut on my extra sheet they give us 150 KB PNG wipe extra j--- running down my balls > wipe to far > wipe ass > wipe ass so hard that it leaves a s--- stain on the white sheet > ohfuckmylifeifmysgtfindthis.exe > try to use germ x to get it out huh no good wont come out > grab a trash bag and put it in said trash bag > sneak out of barracks >I s--- you not a f------ mp police car is right there > I'm just thrown out dinner > he believes me even tho im using a lager trash bag > throw it in dumpster and wish him a good night > mfw i pray he doesn't investigate it
: Anonymous 03/21/21(Sun)09:39:46 No.850096958 > be me > be 19 year old army f-- > get real bored nothing to do in barracks > get horny > say “f--- it" and pull up p--- > Tomboys.webm > nut on my extra sheet they give us 150 KB PNG wipe extra j--- running down my balls > wipe to far > wipe ass > wipe ass so hard that it leaves a s--- stain on the white sheet > ohfuckmylifeifmysgtfindthis.exe > try to use germ x to get it out huh no good wont come out > grab a trash bag and put it in said trash bag > sneak out of barracks >I s--- you not a f------ mp police car is right there > I'm just thrown out dinner > he believes me even tho im using a lager trash bag > throw it in dumpster and wish him a good night > mfw i pray he doesn't investigate it

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Anon loves his mom | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/06/18(Fri)22:29:45 No.773601407 >Mom comes home from work stressed out as usual , dad home drunk >Sees me depressed and unmotivated to do anything > takes me and my sister out to eat >let me order anything from the menu , as the good boy I am I order tendies with 46 KB PNG hunny mussy >we leave and go visit my uncle and my newborn cousin >on our ride back home we listen to Southern Nights , a song I love >mfw I realized she did this all for me to cheer up >came home and didn't want to cry and say "i love you" cause l'm a wuss > grow a pair of balls and go say "I love you and thanks for taking me out "sobbing all over her | shoulder >still crying while writing this > although you'll never see this > Thank you mom , I love you with all my heart
: Anonymous 07/06/18(Fri)22:29:45 No.773601407 >Mom comes home from work stressed out as usual , dad home drunk >Sees me depressed and unmotivated to do anything > takes me and my sister out to eat >let me order anything from the menu , as the good boy I am I order tendies with 46 KB PNG hunny mussy >we leave and go visit my uncle and my newborn cousin >on our ride back home we listen to Southern Nights , a song I love >mfw I realized she did this all for me to cheer up >came home and didn't want to cry and say "i love you" cause l'm a wuss > grow a pair of balls and go say "I love you and thanks for taking me out "sobbing all over her | shoulder >still crying while writing this > although you'll never see this > Thank you mom , I love you with all my heart

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Somebody cares for Anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/02/18(Sun)20:03:36 No.778848231 >be me >be with this girl >she kinda accepts me >even tho I'm a /b/eta >she let's me stay at her place >very comfy, smells good >l can play vidya too >she offers that she could make some food for 66 KB JPG me >hell f------ yes! >she even asks what would I eat >tendietime.wav >her tendies are the best >she cares for me I can feel it >I love my mum
: Anonymous 09/02/18(Sun)20:03:36 No.778848231 >be me >be with this girl >she kinda accepts me >even tho I'm a /b/eta >she let's me stay at her place >very comfy, smells good >l can play vidya too >she offers that she could make some food for 66 KB JPG me >hell f------ yes! >she even asks what would I eat >tendietime.wav >her tendies are the best >she cares for me I can feel it >I love my mum

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Anon is a Plague Doctor. | /r/Greentext

>be me >medieval doctor >get swag for treating people >make a leper eat some leeches >get dope ass mask >sprinkle salt on some bitch's exploded 103 KB JPG anus >get dope ass peasant beating stick >next step is tophat >ohshit.tapestry >look for more patients but everyone is healthy >travel looking for sick people >find some dumbass rat covered in fleas >idea.oiloncanvas >fleas = disease %3D >disease = clients >clients = tophat >go back to london and release rat %3D >few months later >everyone dead, still no clients >find dead doctor who got the tophat before the mask >mfw I killed 1/3 of Europe >mfw I slowed down humanity as a whole >mfw everyone I knew is dead >mfw I have a tophat worth
>be me >medieval doctor >get swag for treating people >make a leper eat some leeches >get dope ass mask >sprinkle salt on some bitch's exploded 103 KB JPG anus >get dope ass peasant beating stick >next step is tophat >ohshit.tapestry >look for more patients but everyone is healthy >travel looking for sick people >find some dumbass rat covered in fleas >idea.oiloncanvas >fleas = disease %3D >disease = clients >clients = tophat >go back to london and release rat %3D >few months later >everyone dead, still no clients >find dead doctor who got the tophat before the mask >mfw I killed 1/3 of Europe >mfw I slowed down humanity as a whole >mfw everyone I knew is dead >mfw I have a tophat worth

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Anon is Dhar Mann | /r/Greentext

[Advertise on 4chan] turn] [Catalog] [Bottom] e: download (1).jpg (40 KB, 652x642) O Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)15:21:33 No.6283676: >be me >walking down street >see bullies break this kids glasses >run over to them >HEY! What are you doing to that kid????? >Bullies say "Just rough housing" >Guys you can't do that >So you see.. . >Talk to them about my experiences >You see, thats why you shouldn't be mean to him >Bullies look sorry >Walk away >Bullies start beating the kid up again >l did a good thing
[Advertise on 4chan] turn] [Catalog] [Bottom] e: download (1).jpg (40 KB, 652x642) O Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)15:21:33 No.6283676: >be me >walking down street >see bullies break this kids glasses >run over to them >HEY! What are you doing to that kid????? >Bullies say "Just rough housing" >Guys you can't do that >So you see.. . >Talk to them about my experiences >You see, thats why you shouldn't be mean to him >Bullies look sorry >Walk away >Bullies start beating the kid up again >l did a good thing

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Anon wants to smoke weed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)20:13:42 No.850099251 Immeasurable Disappointment >boring forgettable day so far >get a text from a coworker >kinda greasy sketchy neckbearded dude but not annoying, have made small talk with him before at work 15 KB JPG >"Hey anon wanna come over and smoke" >hell yeah weed time >pull up to the address he gave me >dilapidated trailer by a pond, smells like dog s--- >oh well at least i get to smoke >hesitantly enter trailer >"Hey anon! (small talk)" >honestly just waiting to smoke, decide to bring it up >"You down to smoke?" >"You know it" >mfw he pulls out a pack of cigarettes
: Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)20:13:42 No.850099251 Immeasurable Disappointment >boring forgettable day so far >get a text from a coworker >kinda greasy sketchy neckbearded dude but not annoying, have made small talk with him before at work 15 KB JPG >"Hey anon wanna come over and smoke" >hell yeah weed time >pull up to the address he gave me >dilapidated trailer by a pond, smells like dog s--- >oh well at least i get to smoke >hesitantly enter trailer >"Hey anon! (small talk)" >honestly just waiting to smoke, decide to bring it up >"You down to smoke?" >"You know it" >mfw he pulls out a pack of cigarettes

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Anon is an intellectual | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous They know 07/27/18(Fri)19:19:29 No.19523436 >be me >fap >go out in public THEY KNOW 551 KB PNG
: Anonymous They know 07/27/18(Fri)19:19:29 No.19523436 >be me >fap >go out in public THEY KNOW 551 KB PNG

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Anon is special | /r/Greentext

File: 77 IQ mastermind.png (224 KB, 400x400) O Anon takes an iq rest Anonymous 01/09/21(Sat >>61790404 >>61790760 >Be me >Wondering if i am smart >go to iqtest.com >score = 77 >mfw >takes test again >score 130 >mfw i became a genious in under ten minutes >feels good man Anonvmous 01/09/21(Sat)17:06:27 No.61790
File: 77 IQ mastermind.png (224 KB, 400x400) O Anon takes an iq rest Anonymous 01/09/21(Sat >>61790404 >>61790760 >Be me >Wondering if i am smart >go to iqtest.com >score = 77 >mfw >takes test again >score 130 >mfw i became a genious in under ten minutes >feels good man Anonvmous 01/09/21(Sat)17:06:27 No.61790

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Anon is a philosipher | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/23/15(Wed)16:21:26 No.658986823 Am I the only one here who likes to take s---- in the shower and watch the water slowly disintegrate them? 6 KB JPG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 12/23/15(Wed) 16:23:34 No.658987052 >>658986823 (OP)# yes
: Anonymous 12/23/15(Wed)16:21:26 No.658986823 Am I the only one here who likes to take s---- in the shower and watch the water slowly disintegrate them? 6 KB JPG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 12/23/15(Wed) 16:23:34 No.658987052 >>658986823 (OP)# yes

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Anon is a conspiracy theorist | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)13:05:37 No.850050574 >recruited priests and monks to be combat medics (sanitater) in ww2 >didn't recruit rabbis I don't want to cross conspiracy theory territory, but was it possible that Hitler was an anti-semite?
Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)13:05:37 No.850050574 >recruited priests and monks to be combat medics (sanitater) in ww2 >didn't recruit rabbis I don't want to cross conspiracy theory territory, but was it possible that Hitler was an anti-semite?

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Anon has a point | /r/Greentext

4h (3/20 16:29) · 148317395 110 Re · 27 Img · JPG · 104KB · (736 × 960) 9 Replies >southern character in a movie >WELLL I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT BUT WELLLLL I DON'T KNOW ABOUT ANY OF THAT BIG CITY STUFF BUT WELLLLLLLLL I'M FROM THE SOUTH, AND DOWN HERE WE DO THINGS A BIT DIFFERENTLY. ...
4h (3/20 16:29) · 148317395 110 Re · 27 Img · JPG · 104KB · (736 × 960) 9 Replies >southern character in a movie >WELLL I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT BUT WELLLLL I DON'T KNOW ABOUT ANY OF THAT BIG CITY STUFF BUT WELLLLLLLLL I'M FROM THE SOUTH, AND DOWN HERE WE DO THINGS A BIT DIFFERENTLY. ...

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Anon finds a way to stop bullying | /r/Greentext

Stopped getting bullied stories >be me >constantly picked on because of my size >kids kick me and taunt me 25 KB JPG and s--- >one day in class chad tells me to kill myself >"oh I guarentee im gonna kill myself pretty soon I mostly just wonder how many of you I'll take with me" >class goes silent >mfw never got bullied again
Stopped getting bullied stories >be me >constantly picked on because of my size >kids kick me and taunt me 25 KB JPG and s--- >one day in class chad tells me to kill myself >"oh I guarentee im gonna kill myself pretty soon I mostly just wonder how many of you I'll take with me" >class goes silent >mfw never got bullied again

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Anon goes on a date | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/02/21 (Sat)19:07:01 No.843817428 >take first shower in 3 weeks >use the good shampoo and body wash >put on best clothes >do my hair >dig out the $150 cologne 9 KB JPG >going on a date? >yes >with a woman? >no >..with a man? >no >with a newly bought fleshlight? >yes! This...this isnt how i pictured my love life in my 20s.
: Anonymous 01/02/21 (Sat)19:07:01 No.843817428 >take first shower in 3 weeks >use the good shampoo and body wash >put on best clothes >do my hair >dig out the $150 cologne 9 KB JPG >going on a date? >yes >with a woman? >no >..with a man? >no >with a newly bought fleshlight? >yes! This...this isnt how i pictured my love life in my 20s.

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Anon is lonely | /r/Greentext

>be me >22 >lonely; no friends >drunk and bored on a firday night| >make a /b/ thread about some random b------- >2 reponses and then nothing >reply to my own thread to bump 32 KB JPG it >still nothing >start replying to my own replies to simulate conversation in my own thread >lonelier than ever is this peak isolation? i argue with and humuliate myself just so other degenerates will think i am worth talking too. what a meek existence. what is the best way to kill yourself /b/? prefer reſplies from people with firsthand experience
>be me >22 >lonely; no friends >drunk and bored on a firday night| >make a /b/ thread about some random b------- >2 reponses and then nothing >reply to my own thread to bump 32 KB JPG it >still nothing >start replying to my own replies to simulate conversation in my own thread >lonelier than ever is this peak isolation? i argue with and humuliate myself just so other degenerates will think i am worth talking too. what a meek existence. what is the best way to kill yourself /b/? prefer reſplies from people with firsthand experience

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New favorite boy banned | /r/Greentext

File: Chris.jpg (19 KB, 600x900) O Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)07:46:30 No.850054285 [Reply] >yesterday >be me >be out in a park with friends >"Anon, let's go chatting up people" >OK with me >it's to warm up for picking up chicks >60 year old woman walks by >friend comments on her dog, good times >gets in the groove, needs to talk more >girls walks by, texting >him: "why are you texting me?" >I cringe like hell, f------ lame ass. >girl turns to us >she's 12 >f--- me, just say you're sorry dude and- >"why are you texting me, I'm right here!" >w--.png. did he really just >she actually responds: "You want me to text you?" >"Yes" >fuckmylife.avi >"You wish!" >she walks off >I call him out on chatting up a loli >"It's fine, I wouldn't go any further" >uh-huh >suddenly understand why women don't trust us >get the f--- out of the park before the cops come >still laughing about it the next morning though
File: Chris.jpg (19 KB, 600x900) O Anonymous 03/20/21(Sat)07:46:30 No.850054285 [Reply] >yesterday >be me >be out in a park with friends >"Anon, let's go chatting up people" >OK with me >it's to warm up for picking up chicks >60 year old woman walks by >friend comments on her dog, good times >gets in the groove, needs to talk more >girls walks by, texting >him: "why are you texting me?" >I cringe like hell, f------ lame ass. >girl turns to us >she's 12 >f--- me, just say you're sorry dude and- >"why are you texting me, I'm right here!" >w--.png. did he really just >she actually responds: "You want me to text you?" >"Yes" >fuckmylife.avi >"You wish!" >she walks off >I call him out on chatting up a loli >"It's fine, I wouldn't go any further" >uh-huh >suddenly understand why women don't trust us >get the f--- out of the park before the cops come >still laughing about it the next morning though

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