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Anon's got a point | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)18:58:18 No.63132183 >forgot i left the TV on in the other room >the news comes on, my first time listening in months >talking about mass shootings >then onto mass vaccination centers >some celebrity died >then onto gun control and some other 43 KB PNG s--- >back to mass shootings >back to corona and vaccines >finally get to the weather >i turn it off how can anyone watch this kind of thing everyday and not feel dejected?
: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)18:58:18 No.63132183 >forgot i left the TV on in the other room >the news comes on, my first time listening in months >talking about mass shootings >then onto mass vaccination centers >some celebrity died >then onto gun control and some other 43 KB PNG s--- >back to mass shootings >back to corona and vaccines >finally get to the weather >i turn it off how can anyone watch this kind of thing everyday and not feel dejected?

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Japan fascinates anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/08/21(Thu)13:25:37 No.851615053- JAPAN SAYS SORRY, BUT IT HAS TO DUMP THIS RADIOACTIVE WATER INTO THE OCEAN >irresponsibly use nuclear power without adequate safeguards >pollute ocean with nuclear waste >overfish bluefin tuna to endangerment >commercially hunt whales under the lie of "scientific research" EELONG 633 KB JPG >fail to account for multiple war atrocities against chinese and koreans including torture, murder, r---, cannibalism, attacks on hospital ships >until 2016, divorced men could marry immediately but women had to wait 6 months >technically has a law saying showing thighs can get you 29 days in jail >meanwhile, loli and shota culturally accepted >normalized monster r--- anime in print and screen >women's dirty panties can literally be bought in vending machines >scat p--- and other oddities normalized (but blur out the p----) >literally had to pass a law to mandate 'always on' shutter click sound fx on all cameras because of creepshot epidemic >suicide epidemic, numbers on the rise >hikikomori (sperg++ neets, effectively) population tops 10 million, and rising w-- is up with japan? 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 04/08/21(Thu)13:29:15 No.851615251 >>851615053 (OP) # >Whats wrong with japan? They are japan, thats what Ever heard that the most psycothic people are the most intelligent? Thats japan in a nutshell FaceApp 294 KB PNG : Anonymous 04/08/21(Thu)13:29:33 No.851615274 >>851615053 (OP) # >w-- is up with japan? They're based is what. F--- you, n-----
: Anonymous 04/08/21(Thu)13:25:37 No.851615053- JAPAN SAYS SORRY, BUT IT HAS TO DUMP THIS RADIOACTIVE WATER INTO THE OCEAN >irresponsibly use nuclear power without adequate safeguards >pollute ocean with nuclear waste >overfish bluefin tuna to endangerment >commercially hunt whales under the lie of "scientific research" EELONG 633 KB JPG >fail to account for multiple war atrocities against chinese and koreans including torture, murder, r---, cannibalism, attacks on hospital ships >until 2016, divorced men could marry immediately but women had to wait 6 months >technically has a law saying showing thighs can get you 29 days in jail >meanwhile, loli and shota culturally accepted >normalized monster r--- anime in print and screen >women's dirty panties can literally be bought in vending machines >scat p--- and other oddities normalized (but blur out the p----) >literally had to pass a law to mandate 'always on' shutter click sound fx on all cameras because of creepshot epidemic >suicide epidemic, numbers on the rise >hikikomori (sperg++ neets, effectively) population tops 10 million, and rising w-- is up with japan? 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 04/08/21(Thu)13:29:15 No.851615251 >>851615053 (OP) # >Whats wrong with japan? They are japan, thats what Ever heard that the most psycothic people are the most intelligent? Thats japan in a nutshell FaceApp 294 KB PNG : Anonymous 04/08/21(Thu)13:29:33 No.851615274 >>851615053 (OP) # >w-- is up with japan? They're based is what. F--- you, n-----

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Anon has a realization | /r/Greentext

File: strange kreatur in the train.jpg (96 KB, 959x1282) Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)09:48:48 No.63131323 >taking a break >eating a snack in the walmart break room >boss walks in >Hey I almost forgot, it's your birthday today Litte isn't it? >Yeah >happy birthday! how old are you? >Thanks. Turning 33 today >Oh thats great, I wish I was your age, well enjoy your day >leaves >sit alone in the break room >realize ive been working min wage for 11 years now
File: strange kreatur in the train.jpg (96 KB, 959x1282) Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)09:48:48 No.63131323 >taking a break >eating a snack in the walmart break room >boss walks in >Hey I almost forgot, it's your birthday today Litte isn't it? >Yeah >happy birthday! how old are you? >Thanks. Turning 33 today >Oh thats great, I wish I was your age, well enjoy your day >leaves >sit alone in the break room >realize ive been working min wage for 11 years now

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anon gets a birthday present | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: ue4fWrSi) E 04/02/21(Fri)00:02:53 No.314823601 File: 1610339049959.jpg (115 KB, 824x928) Anonymous Tue 18 Jun 2019 20:56:17 No.466992079 View Reply Original Report >be me >turn 23 >doorbell rings >it's my grandma >"Happy birthday, anon!" >gives me a HUGE gondola doll (pic related) >"I sewed you this woollen toy. I was looking at your Facebook with your mom wondering what you might like and we repeatedly saw this character so I decided to make you one!" Can someone please tell me what the f--- just happened, v/? Am I dreaming right now? View Same Google iqdb SauceNAO 4 gondola2.jpg, 101KIB, 960x1280 98KIB, 960x1280, gondola.jpg View Same Google igdb SauceNAO Anonymous Tue 18 Jun 2019 20:56:59 No.466992147 Report Quoted By: >>466992520 >>466993730 >>466994375 >>466994541 >>466994916 >>466995009 >>466995126 There it f------ sits.
Anonymous (ID: ue4fWrSi) E 04/02/21(Fri)00:02:53 No.314823601 File: 1610339049959.jpg (115 KB, 824x928) Anonymous Tue 18 Jun 2019 20:56:17 No.466992079 View Reply Original Report >be me >turn 23 >doorbell rings >it's my grandma >"Happy birthday, anon!" >gives me a HUGE gondola doll (pic related) >"I sewed you this woollen toy. I was looking at your Facebook with your mom wondering what you might like and we repeatedly saw this character so I decided to make you one!" Can someone please tell me what the f--- just happened, v/? Am I dreaming right now? View Same Google iqdb SauceNAO 4 gondola2.jpg, 101KIB, 960x1280 98KIB, 960x1280, gondola.jpg View Same Google igdb SauceNAO Anonymous Tue 18 Jun 2019 20:56:59 No.466992147 Report Quoted By: >>466992520 >>466993730 >>466994375 >>466994541 >>466994916 >>466995009 >>466995126 There it f------ sits.

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Anon is a pervert | /r/Greentext

>give female friend a ride >intentionally don't turn on the ac so she 1 KB JPG Sweats >sniff the seat once she gets out
>give female friend a ride >intentionally don't turn on the ac so she 1 KB JPG Sweats >sniff the seat once she gets out

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Anon's first experience with a girl. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/09/21 (Fri)15:00:08 No.851654096 >Be me >17 >Work at a drink place in an amusement park >Bathrooms closest to us are always closed 31 KB PNG >regularly steal drinks, it's part of the job >work with a hot girl my age >Start to be friends with her >One night it's just us, everyone else already left >We close the stand, get our large 60 oz drinks and chat for a bit >We finish our drinks, go to the bathroom to find it's closed >Start walking to our cars >She asks me if I want to learn some things >Never done anything with a girl >"uhh, sure" >She starts showing me to do intimate things >Start making out in her car >"So what else do people usually do?" >"They usually do stuff down there" >Start to finger her >After a while something happens, it gets wet >ls This what being wet is? >Keep going >After a while there's a bit more, doesn't bother me >"Umm, stop" >"Have you had enough?" >"No, I think I p----- myself" >We turn on the light, it's everywhere >Go to McDonalds for napkins >Spend 20 minutes cleaning ourselves >First time with a girl and she f------ p----- on me
: Anonymous 04/09/21 (Fri)15:00:08 No.851654096 >Be me >17 >Work at a drink place in an amusement park >Bathrooms closest to us are always closed 31 KB PNG >regularly steal drinks, it's part of the job >work with a hot girl my age >Start to be friends with her >One night it's just us, everyone else already left >We close the stand, get our large 60 oz drinks and chat for a bit >We finish our drinks, go to the bathroom to find it's closed >Start walking to our cars >She asks me if I want to learn some things >Never done anything with a girl >"uhh, sure" >She starts showing me to do intimate things >Start making out in her car >"So what else do people usually do?" >"They usually do stuff down there" >Start to finger her >After a while something happens, it gets wet >ls This what being wet is? >Keep going >After a while there's a bit more, doesn't bother me >"Umm, stop" >"Have you had enough?" >"No, I think I p----- myself" >We turn on the light, it's everywhere >Go to McDonalds for napkins >Spend 20 minutes cleaning ourselves >First time with a girl and she f------ p----- on me

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Anon is brazilian | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/08/21(Thu)21:40:12 No.851631582 YOU'ARE GOING >be me >brazilian >l am in Brazil >l don't need to come tro Brazil >Brazil isn't comming to me >l am safe from Brazil >wait, nobody is safe in Brazil TO BRAZIL 36 KB JPG >someone save me from Brazil
: Anonymous 04/08/21(Thu)21:40:12 No.851631582 YOU'ARE GOING >be me >brazilian >l am in Brazil >l don't need to come tro Brazil >Brazil isn't comming to me >l am safe from Brazil >wait, nobody is safe in Brazil TO BRAZIL 36 KB JPG >someone save me from Brazil

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Anon has english | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)12:24:41 No.851663505 > be in middle school English period > was told to write a word starting with the letter "g" and many syllables as possible > cannot repeat words > my turn >mind started to race as I feel judgmental stares 430 KB PNG > wrote "Gobbledygook" > classmates laughed > teacher said, "Don't make up words, anon" > everyone mocked my vocabulary for the rest of the day > went home and found dictionary > next day showed it to the teacher that it exists > rather than explaining it to the class, teacher replied, "Stop being a sore loser." >mfw Also, I scored a 98% in the final English exam yet my English grade on my report card was a C. 6 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)12:24:41 No.851663505 > be in middle school English period > was told to write a word starting with the letter "g" and many syllables as possible > cannot repeat words > my turn >mind started to race as I feel judgmental stares 430 KB PNG > wrote "Gobbledygook" > classmates laughed > teacher said, "Don't make up words, anon" > everyone mocked my vocabulary for the rest of the day > went home and found dictionary > next day showed it to the teacher that it exists > rather than explaining it to the class, teacher replied, "Stop being a sore loser." >mfw Also, I scored a 98% in the final English exam yet my English grade on my report card was a C. 6 Replies View Thread

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Anon becomes an incel | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/15/20(Tue)22:46:08 No.842434393 >download tinder >every girl looks about the same >they all have stupid bios >every match I get acts like they're too good for me > finally have enough of the b------- >start trolling for the fun of it seeing 267 KB PNG as I got nowhere before >act like a complete a------ >put pics up of me in my buddies C63 AMG >pictures of me leaning on the car etc >put job down as lawyer >lie saying I live in a rich neighborhood >post pics of a random pool with a view >start matching like crazy >girls message me first everytime >a lot asking about the car >be a d--- and tell them their t--- aren't big enough to ride in it they aren't pretty enough to be seen in it etc. >a lot of them respond with lols and laughing emojis remaining friendly >tell me how funny I am >some offer to suck my d---/ f--- me in the car or by "my pool" >realize how awesome life could be if I had money >get depressed >realize what a loser I am >this back fired tremendously
: Anonymous 12/15/20(Tue)22:46:08 No.842434393 >download tinder >every girl looks about the same >they all have stupid bios >every match I get acts like they're too good for me > finally have enough of the b------- >start trolling for the fun of it seeing 267 KB PNG as I got nowhere before >act like a complete a------ >put pics up of me in my buddies C63 AMG >pictures of me leaning on the car etc >put job down as lawyer >lie saying I live in a rich neighborhood >post pics of a random pool with a view >start matching like crazy >girls message me first everytime >a lot asking about the car >be a d--- and tell them their t--- aren't big enough to ride in it they aren't pretty enough to be seen in it etc. >a lot of them respond with lols and laughing emojis remaining friendly >tell me how funny I am >some offer to suck my d---/ f--- me in the car or by "my pool" >realize how awesome life could be if I had money >get depressed >realize what a loser I am >this back fired tremendously

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anon has moobs | /r/Greentext

File: i wish for death.jpg (38 KB, 600x689) Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)01:04:02 No.851648309 >be me >fat >have man boobs >squeeze man boobs >get hard whats wrong with me, /b/?
File: i wish for death.jpg (38 KB, 600x689) Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)01:04:02 No.851648309 >be me >fat >have man boobs >squeeze man boobs >get hard whats wrong with me, /b/?

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Anon is now gay | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 03/13/21(Sat)14:25:15 No.62733814 [Reply] >be me >In uni >Have to take Spanish class to fullfil some requirement >Part of our grade is a spoken portion that consists of us all sitting down and the teacher asking us questions and us answering them infront of the class >Already kinda f----- up on it before and my grade is pretty s--- in the class, need to do better this time around >Professor asks me several questions, and eventually asks me to describe my girlfriend or make up stuff if I don't have one (i obviously don't) >Blank a little >"mi novio es de Argentina, mi novio tiene 20 anos, a mi novio le gusta escuchar musica." >Professor responds "That's good anon but I think you meant "mi novia" >Realized that I forgot to properly gender the words >Realize I still need a good grade in this class >Respond "no, i meant to say that" >Get an A in that sleeping portion >Obviously gay kid asks to hang out after class F------ spanish made me gay.
O Anonymous 03/13/21(Sat)14:25:15 No.62733814 [Reply] >be me >In uni >Have to take Spanish class to fullfil some requirement >Part of our grade is a spoken portion that consists of us all sitting down and the teacher asking us questions and us answering them infront of the class >Already kinda f----- up on it before and my grade is pretty s--- in the class, need to do better this time around >Professor asks me several questions, and eventually asks me to describe my girlfriend or make up stuff if I don't have one (i obviously don't) >Blank a little >"mi novio es de Argentina, mi novio tiene 20 anos, a mi novio le gusta escuchar musica." >Professor responds "That's good anon but I think you meant "mi novia" >Realized that I forgot to properly gender the words >Realize I still need a good grade in this class >Respond "no, i meant to say that" >Get an A in that sleeping portion >Obviously gay kid asks to hang out after class F------ spanish made me gay.

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Anon hates his boss | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)10:47:52 No.63127889 > be me > new boss > big fat bitch > constantly complains about their weight > can't say anything because boss > awkward.jpeg 17 KB PNG > 5 months later > boss is bigger/fatter/bitchier > still complaining about being a big fat bitch > self-employed
: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)10:47:52 No.63127889 > be me > new boss > big fat bitch > constantly complains about their weight > can't say anything because boss > awkward.jpeg 17 KB PNG > 5 months later > boss is bigger/fatter/bitchier > still complaining about being a big fat bitch > self-employed

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Femanon gives a tip to her fellow retards | /r/Greentext

Might be wrong place idk Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)03:31:44 No.63127233 [Reply] >Be me >10/10 Femanon >7/10 Guy asks me out after recent breakup >F--- it why not >He takes me to this nice enough restaurant and it's going well >"So anon what do you do in your free time" >"Umm 4chan" >Deadfuckingsilence >Any attraction to this guy instantly disintegrates >Rest of the date awkward as f--- because he starts talking about this f------ board Guys if you want some p---- the first step to getting it is to leave this site or at least don't f------ bring it up on dates
Might be wrong place idk Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)03:31:44 No.63127233 [Reply] >Be me >10/10 Femanon >7/10 Guy asks me out after recent breakup >F--- it why not >He takes me to this nice enough restaurant and it's going well >"So anon what do you do in your free time" >"Umm 4chan" >Deadfuckingsilence >Any attraction to this guy instantly disintegrates >Rest of the date awkward as f--- because he starts talking about this f------ board Guys if you want some p---- the first step to getting it is to leave this site or at least don't f------ bring it up on dates

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Anon is trans | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/02/19(Wed)09:08:26 No.52625171 Just found a loop hole in the the system lads >be me >want steroids for quick gains >live in small town so I cant get them easily 21 KB PNG >hear about female to male hormone treatment >basically pure testosterone in a pill >idea.jpg >order a few months supply Muscle city here I come Anonymous 10/02/19(Wed)09:18:41 No.526 >>52625211 # Ya I'm trans alright. Male to alpha male >>52625279 # >>52625320 # >>52625346 # >>52625362 #
: Anonymous 10/02/19(Wed)09:08:26 No.52625171 Just found a loop hole in the the system lads >be me >want steroids for quick gains >live in small town so I cant get them easily 21 KB PNG >hear about female to male hormone treatment >basically pure testosterone in a pill >idea.jpg >order a few months supply Muscle city here I come Anonymous 10/02/19(Wed)09:18:41 No.526 >>52625211 # Ya I'm trans alright. Male to alpha male >>52625279 # >>52625320 # >>52625346 # >>52625362 #

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Anon is disappointed | /r/Greentext

>be me >freshman year high-school >pretty lonely, I have abunch of friends who are girls but they all already friend zoned me >chilling with my best friend >telling jokes, just having some fun 197 KB PNG >he is a f-- but I'm fine with him because he friendzoned me too >he says he's gonna get some more friends so we aren't just by ourselves >hes gone for a bit and in scrolling through my phone >he gets back >these two 10/10 goth girls sit down next to him >a 10/10 tomboy also sits down >cant_contain_the_boner.mp4 >we chat for a pretty long time >all three of the girls are really nice, genuinely interesting >one of the goth girls takes of her sweater and she's wearing a tank top >mommy milkies >we continue talking >evauntully bring up my friends faggotness >they say they are fine with it >"oh yeah l'm trans" says one of the girls >wait who said that >tomboy >"and we are lesbians" the two goth girls say >boner dies >"uh huh" I reply >didnt do anything the rest of the day >get home and cry in bed
>be me >freshman year high-school >pretty lonely, I have abunch of friends who are girls but they all already friend zoned me >chilling with my best friend >telling jokes, just having some fun 197 KB PNG >he is a f-- but I'm fine with him because he friendzoned me too >he says he's gonna get some more friends so we aren't just by ourselves >hes gone for a bit and in scrolling through my phone >he gets back >these two 10/10 goth girls sit down next to him >a 10/10 tomboy also sits down >cant_contain_the_boner.mp4 >we chat for a pretty long time >all three of the girls are really nice, genuinely interesting >one of the goth girls takes of her sweater and she's wearing a tank top >mommy milkies >we continue talking >evauntully bring up my friends faggotness >they say they are fine with it >"oh yeah l'm trans" says one of the girls >wait who said that >tomboy >"and we are lesbians" the two goth girls say >boner dies >"uh huh" I reply >didnt do anything the rest of the day >get home and cry in bed

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Anon donates blood | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)07:06:25 No.63123338 >Be me >Donated blood today cause I haven't in a while and its nice to do >My veins are mired during the pre screening >Doctor says the tourniquet isn't 62 KB JPG even necessary >Donate blood >Cookie.jpg >You should donate blood too
: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)07:06:25 No.63123338 >Be me >Donated blood today cause I haven't in a while and its nice to do >My veins are mired during the pre screening >Doctor says the tourniquet isn't 62 KB JPG even necessary >Donate blood >Cookie.jpg >You should donate blood too

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Anon sees a female | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)02:22:22 No.63122409 >grug see female >grug like female >grug capture female >grug mount female >grug make whitewater come out >grug happy 42 KB JPG
: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)02:22:22 No.63122409 >grug see female >grug like female >grug capture female >grug mount female >grug make whitewater come out >grug happy 42 KB JPG

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Anon acts like an asshole | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)05:42:15 No.63122299 >>63122109 (OP) # >have a crush on a chick >we're sat together >decide to try and make her laugh >decide to roast my friend for laughs >say really mean s--- 42 KB JPG >she doesn't laugh >friend gets upset and leaves >lose a friend and don't gain a girl Sorry bro.
: Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)05:42:15 No.63122299 >>63122109 (OP) # >have a crush on a chick >we're sat together >decide to try and make her laugh >decide to roast my friend for laughs >say really mean s--- 42 KB JPG >she doesn't laugh >friend gets upset and leaves >lose a friend and don't gain a girl Sorry bro.

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anon is a master communicator | /r/Greentext

File: 121-1217997_7019640-wojak(.).jpg (55 KB, 320x320) O Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)01:24:25 No.851622943 >be me >15 at the time >see a 10/10 qt >i say hi > she doesn't respond >i say hi again >she ignores me >i kept saying hi to her until her father came and told me that she's deaf why am i like this
File: 121-1217997_7019640-wojak(.).jpg (55 KB, 320x320) O Anonymous 04/09/21(Fri)01:24:25 No.851622943 >be me >15 at the time >see a 10/10 qt >i say hi > she doesn't respond >i say hi again >she ignores me >i kept saying hi to her until her father came and told me that she's deaf why am i like this

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Anon considers joining the pack | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: MOqSTCCC)E 01/17/17(Tue)11:33:57 No.107429717 >Start dating girl >Find out she's a f------ furry >But she's a solid 8.5/10 >Furry community is actually not that bad, but once they don their outfits I gag 298 KB JPG a little >Find out they want me to go through a trial to join their little group of friends which involves fist fighting with 15 people to gain "Alpha" status in the pack >At the end, besides Alpha status, one of the girls can be chosen for a sexual reward (not going to happen anyway because I'm dating one of these f------ furries) >Find out they've beat the f--- out of people on multiple occasions When in the f--- did furries start turning into gangs? I mean, I guess I wouldn't mind socking a couple of these arards, but still, what the f---? Is my willingness to even participate the first sign of mental illness?
: Anonymous (ID: MOqSTCCC)E 01/17/17(Tue)11:33:57 No.107429717 >Start dating girl >Find out she's a f------ furry >But she's a solid 8.5/10 >Furry community is actually not that bad, but once they don their outfits I gag 298 KB JPG a little >Find out they want me to go through a trial to join their little group of friends which involves fist fighting with 15 people to gain "Alpha" status in the pack >At the end, besides Alpha status, one of the girls can be chosen for a sexual reward (not going to happen anyway because I'm dating one of these f------ furries) >Find out they've beat the f--- out of people on multiple occasions When in the f--- did furries start turning into gangs? I mean, I guess I wouldn't mind socking a couple of these arards, but still, what the f---? Is my willingness to even participate the first sign of mental illness?

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