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Anon struggles to cope | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)23:11:38 No.854761538 >be me >got big head >hat don't fit damn 303 KB JPG
: Anonymous 05/18/21(Tue)23:11:38 No.854761538 >be me >got big head >hat don't fit damn 303 KB JPG

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Shut up and dance | /r/Greentext

RA Greentext I suppose > Be me, 16 yo > 2016 > Party Rock Anthem is already old but I discover their music videos > Learn to shuffle dance because those videos are the best f------ thing to ever exist and I watch them all the time > I'm a bit fat, very shy, good grades, very nerdy, 23 KB JPG but now I know how to dance > Fast forward 2 years, my high school class goes on a cruise ship > There's some sort of talent show, I decide to dance shuffle there because why the f--- not > I act, dance to Sorry For Party Rocking, end, then go to sleep > Next day every f------ body on the cruise ship knows me, apparently no one else knew how to dance shuffle > Go to the rest of the parties, dance all night, but never with a girl because I'm a beta virgin > Last night, a girl aproaches me > We dance, she tells me her room before leaving > After the party ends, go to her room. I expected to talk or something > Her room is full of other girls and boys, but she comes out > "Well, I expected to hang out at your place femanon but it seems full" > "Yeah, how about we go to your room anon?" > Hold the f--- up > This isn't like in the animes > This is not happening > Go to my room > Proceed to make out > Lift her shirt > Take out her bra > End up losing my virginity to this chick > All of this because these f------ made Party Rock Anthem Learn to dance guys, it is never too late.
RA Greentext I suppose > Be me, 16 yo > 2016 > Party Rock Anthem is already old but I discover their music videos > Learn to shuffle dance because those videos are the best f------ thing to ever exist and I watch them all the time > I'm a bit fat, very shy, good grades, very nerdy, 23 KB JPG but now I know how to dance > Fast forward 2 years, my high school class goes on a cruise ship > There's some sort of talent show, I decide to dance shuffle there because why the f--- not > I act, dance to Sorry For Party Rocking, end, then go to sleep > Next day every f------ body on the cruise ship knows me, apparently no one else knew how to dance shuffle > Go to the rest of the parties, dance all night, but never with a girl because I'm a beta virgin > Last night, a girl aproaches me > We dance, she tells me her room before leaving > After the party ends, go to her room. I expected to talk or something > Her room is full of other girls and boys, but she comes out > "Well, I expected to hang out at your place femanon but it seems full" > "Yeah, how about we go to your room anon?" > Hold the f--- up > This isn't like in the animes > This is not happening > Go to my room > Proceed to make out > Lift her shirt > Take out her bra > End up losing my virginity to this chick > All of this because these f------ made Party Rock Anthem Learn to dance guys, it is never too late.

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Anon forgot to take his meds | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)21:50:0 No.302167405 not my story, but one I had seen like 7 months ago. >have spiderbro >eats random bugs and s--- in my kitchen >once killed a mouse >we live happily together for a few months >one night, go to bars and pick up girl >bring girl home, end up heading to my bedroom >spiderbro is on wall >girl screams runs home >get so angry I kill spiderbro for denying me my needs >find out from friend couple days later that the girl had herpes >spiderbro knew >sadface.jpg
Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)21:50:0 No.302167405 not my story, but one I had seen like 7 months ago. >have spiderbro >eats random bugs and s--- in my kitchen >once killed a mouse >we live happily together for a few months >one night, go to bars and pick up girl >bring girl home, end up heading to my bedroom >spiderbro is on wall >girl screams runs home >get so angry I kill spiderbro for denying me my needs >find out from friend couple days later that the girl had herpes >spiderbro knew >sadface.jpg

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Anon is Mentally Handicapped | /r/Greentext

File: image.jpg (37 KB, 405x509) >be me in high school >walk into class and sit next to girl >she's handicapped and in a wheelchair >she's also a smartass >pull out chemistry homework >get stuck on the first question >"hey, can you help me with this?" >ignored >ask again >she does it but is an ass about it >she says, "this is the easiest thing i've done all day" >p-----.jpg >the intercom tuns on for the pledges >everyone stands >the bitch is still in her wheelchair >time to give her what she deserves >bend down and tell her "this is the easiest thing l've done all day"
File: image.jpg (37 KB, 405x509) >be me in high school >walk into class and sit next to girl >she's handicapped and in a wheelchair >she's also a smartass >pull out chemistry homework >get stuck on the first question >"hey, can you help me with this?" >ignored >ask again >she does it but is an ass about it >she says, "this is the easiest thing i've done all day" >p-----.jpg >the intercom tuns on for the pledges >everyone stands >the bitch is still in her wheelchair >time to give her what she deserves >bend down and tell her "this is the easiest thing l've done all day"

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Suicide hotline anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 815056689 1시간 전 ··. Hey /b/ I need to tell you guys a story >Be me >Be working at suicide hotline >Have access to donation logs >Go through them from time to time between calls >Notice a man has made a donation of 124.0 kB PNG $17.50 every month, same day, for a couple years >Check to see if there's a note with the donations >They all read something like as follows "To Jason, from dad. I miss you every day" >l asked about it, turns out his son killed himself when he was really young >That money is his son's allowance Don't think that people won't miss you, or people will forget you, you are loved anon even if you don't feel it right now. 3 REPLIES 3 IMAGES REPLY
Anonymous | 815056689 1시간 전 ··. Hey /b/ I need to tell you guys a story >Be me >Be working at suicide hotline >Have access to donation logs >Go through them from time to time between calls >Notice a man has made a donation of 124.0 kB PNG $17.50 every month, same day, for a couple years >Check to see if there's a note with the donations >They all read something like as follows "To Jason, from dad. I miss you every day" >l asked about it, turns out his son killed himself when he was really young >That money is his son's allowance Don't think that people won't miss you, or people will forget you, you are loved anon even if you don't feel it right now. 3 REPLIES 3 IMAGES REPLY

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[REQUEST] Looking for a greentext | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/25/19(Mon)21:12:21 No.793612356 >be me >bee me >be bee >bee bee >bee 6 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/25/19(Mon)21:12:21 No.793612356 >be me >bee me >be bee >bee bee >bee 6 KB JPG

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Anon is just like me | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/09/20(Wed)15:29:48 No.613084 >>61307781 (OP) >be me >waiting at bus station >bus arrives >get on bus >reach destination >get off bus
Anonymous 12/09/20(Wed)15:29:48 No.613084 >>61307781 (OP) >be me >waiting at bus station >bus arrives >get on bus >reach destination >get off bus

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anon is chad | /r/Greentext

File: EjUax6KXkAIWoN4.png (415 KB, 1080x1080) O Anonymous 05/19/21(Wed)12:02:33 No.854784692 >normie asks me the time >"I don't know" >"Look at your watch" >look her straight in the eyes >"No" >> Anonymous 05/19/21(Wed)12:21:26 No.854785552
File: EjUax6KXkAIWoN4.png (415 KB, 1080x1080) O Anonymous 05/19/21(Wed)12:02:33 No.854784692 >normie asks me the time >"I don't know" >"Look at your watch" >look her straight in the eyes >"No" >> Anonymous 05/19/21(Wed)12:21:26 No.854785552

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Anon is European | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/19/21(Wed) >wake up >still European
: Anonymous 05/19/21(Wed) >wake up >still European

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Anon gets BTFO by his nephew | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/22/18(Mon)16:50:34 No.42685823 >"Uncle Anon, why aren't you married?" >"Mom says people only get married when they love each other, does that mean no one loves you?" >>42685878 # : Anonymous 01/22/18(Mon)17:24:59 No.42685878 >>42685823 # f------ wish i had a nephew with such top quality banter >>42685953 #
: Anonymous 01/22/18(Mon)16:50:34 No.42685823 >"Uncle Anon, why aren't you married?" >"Mom says people only get married when they love each other, does that mean no one loves you?" >>42685878 # : Anonymous 01/22/18(Mon)17:24:59 No.42685878 >>42685823 # f------ wish i had a nephew with such top quality banter >>42685953 #

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Anon feels pity | /r/Greentext

>enter a Youtube livestream out of curiosity >6 people are watching >not interested in the content, but I can't leave because the streamer might notice the number went down and feel hurt Aute 50 KB GIF >have been stuck in here for an hour Does anyone know this feel?
>enter a Youtube livestream out of curiosity >6 people are watching >not interested in the content, but I can't leave because the streamer might notice the number went down and feel hurt Aute 50 KB GIF >have been stuck in here for an hour Does anyone know this feel?

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Anon tries to impress a girl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Cringiest Alpha Moves 05/12/17(Fri)15:19:49 No.36972961 >be me Par tet Accegting Yeur Death >be 14 or so >live in college apartments and above a cute girl >think of some way to impress her >lightbulb.png >walk downstairs one night to 475 KB PNG check my mail >quietly drop a $1 bill on the ground >cute girl outside, notices I dropped it >sir, you dropped your dollar bill! >turn around slowly >"you can keep it" >walk away >mfw remembering this a few years later and realizing how cringe this was
: Anonymous Cringiest Alpha Moves 05/12/17(Fri)15:19:49 No.36972961 >be me Par tet Accegting Yeur Death >be 14 or so >live in college apartments and above a cute girl >think of some way to impress her >lightbulb.png >walk downstairs one night to 475 KB PNG check my mail >quietly drop a $1 bill on the ground >cute girl outside, notices I dropped it >sir, you dropped your dollar bill! >turn around slowly >"you can keep it" >walk away >mfw remembering this a few years later and realizing how cringe this was

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Anon goes number 2 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/19/21(Wed)06:54:04 No.63736472 >be me >s------- rn >be you >probably not s------- rn 7 KB JPG sucks to be you, doesn't it?
: Anonymous 05/19/21(Wed)06:54:04 No.63736472 >be me >s------- rn >be you >probably not s------- rn 7 KB JPG sucks to be you, doesn't it?

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Anon makes British pizza | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/15/21(Sat)18:07:36 No.16112508 >hawaiian pizza exists >mexicana pizza exists >neapolitan pizza exists What would a "British" pizza be like? Why isn't there a Mongolian or Jewish or Jamaican pizza? 210 KB JPG : Anonymous 05/15/21(Sat)18:14:17 No.16112528 >sourdough bread dough stretched to an XXL: 54mm in diameter >vinegar tomato sauce without tomato >shitfish fresh from their sewage river Thames >"crisps' >contents of one chamber pot >put it in the firey-wirey at 200 thermomidomideys centigrade >OI MAITE IS DONE INNIT IIIIII >>16112559 # >>16113050 # >>16119501 # >>16120450 # >>16122719 # >>16133592 #
: Anonymous 05/15/21(Sat)18:07:36 No.16112508 >hawaiian pizza exists >mexicana pizza exists >neapolitan pizza exists What would a "British" pizza be like? Why isn't there a Mongolian or Jewish or Jamaican pizza? 210 KB JPG : Anonymous 05/15/21(Sat)18:14:17 No.16112528 >sourdough bread dough stretched to an XXL: 54mm in diameter >vinegar tomato sauce without tomato >shitfish fresh from their sewage river Thames >"crisps' >contents of one chamber pot >put it in the firey-wirey at 200 thermomidomideys centigrade >OI MAITE IS DONE INNIT IIIIII >>16112559 # >>16113050 # >>16119501 # >>16120450 # >>16122719 # >>16133592 #

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Anon gets what he deserves | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/17/17(Sun)21:56:15 No.754124819 > Back in 1th grade > Teacher ask to write my name > Draw a banana > Gets a F and public exposure I hate my life 13 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/17/17(Sun)21:58:23 No.754125046 >1th You deserve what you got op
: Anonymous 12/17/17(Sun)21:56:15 No.754124819 > Back in 1th grade > Teacher ask to write my name > Draw a banana > Gets a F and public exposure I hate my life 13 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/17/17(Sun)21:58:23 No.754125046 >1th You deserve what you got op

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Anon gives a suggestion | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: UZNjkQMu ) E 05/19/21(Wed)11:03:56 No.322256581 >wife just "playfully" suggested an open relationship 14 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: rrcRnxrv 05/19/21(Wed)11:05:28 No.322256698 >>322256581 (OP) # >NO000 >NOT DE OPEN RELATIONSHIP OnlyFans for you 104 KB PNG : Anonymous (ID: EwgxGIOX) E 05/19/21(Wed)11:05:39 No.322256713 >>322256581 (OP)_# time to "playfully" file for divorce >>322256773 # >>322257143 # >>322257378 # >>322257410 # >>322257595 # >>322257665 # >>322257844 # >>322257954 # >>322257956 # >>322258080 # >>322259177 # >>322259352 # >>322260262 # >>322260414 # >>322260811 #
: Anonymous (ID: UZNjkQMu ) E 05/19/21(Wed)11:03:56 No.322256581 >wife just "playfully" suggested an open relationship 14 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: rrcRnxrv 05/19/21(Wed)11:05:28 No.322256698 >>322256581 (OP) # >NO000 >NOT DE OPEN RELATIONSHIP OnlyFans for you 104 KB PNG : Anonymous (ID: EwgxGIOX) E 05/19/21(Wed)11:05:39 No.322256713 >>322256581 (OP)_# time to "playfully" file for divorce >>322256773 # >>322257143 # >>322257378 # >>322257410 # >>322257595 # >>322257665 # >>322257844 # >>322257954 # >>322257956 # >>322258080 # >>322259177 # >>322259352 # >>322260262 # >>322260414 # >>322260811 #

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Anon's reason for not owning a gun | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous ? 05/19/21(Wed)02:34:46 No.12777234 >he doesnt own a gun Explain yourself 1.3 MB GIF : Anonymous ? 05/19/21(Wed)04:50:27 No.12777414 >>12777234 (OP) # >home invasion >n------ see you armed and shoot at you >try to kill n------ with gun >maybe manage to kill one or two >the others kill you Vs. >home invasion >n------ see you unarmed and hold you at gunpoint, maybe beat you up a little >they take your s--- >still alive afterwards because you didn't think real life was an action movie
: Anonymous ? 05/19/21(Wed)02:34:46 No.12777234 >he doesnt own a gun Explain yourself 1.3 MB GIF : Anonymous ? 05/19/21(Wed)04:50:27 No.12777414 >>12777234 (OP) # >home invasion >n------ see you armed and shoot at you >try to kill n------ with gun >maybe manage to kill one or two >the others kill you Vs. >home invasion >n------ see you unarmed and hold you at gunpoint, maybe beat you up a little >they take your s--- >still alive afterwards because you didn't think real life was an action movie

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WA ME UUUU | /r/Greentext

ile: d48.png (69 KB, 1054x526) Anonymous 2/05/20(Wed)13:33:24 No.56595472 >>56595958 >SOUJA BOI UP IN E HO >WA ME CWANK A WA ME WO >WA ME CWANK DA SO JO BOI DEN SOOPA MA DA HO NA WAH ME >UUUU >SPANK DAT SAW NAW WA ME >UUUUU >SPANK DAT SAW NAH WAH ME >UUUU >SPENG DAT SAH DAH WAH ME
ile: d48.png (69 KB, 1054x526) Anonymous 2/05/20(Wed)13:33:24 No.56595472 >>56595958 >SOUJA BOI UP IN E HO >WA ME CWANK A WA ME WO >WA ME CWANK DA SO JO BOI DEN SOOPA MA DA HO NA WAH ME >UUUU >SPANK DAT SAW NAW WA ME >UUUUU >SPANK DAT SAW NAH WAH ME >UUUU >SPENG DAT SAH DAH WAH ME

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Anon finds milf | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/24/18(Sat)12:29:05 No.785705600 >be me >be in school >teacher is 12/10 milf >give subtle hints and flirt with her >she flirts back >start to get more physical >kissing, hugging etc >one day start kissing and hugging her 40 KB PNG >she kisses back >end up banging her >her husband walks in >s---.jpg >he beats the f--- out of me and throws me out of the house Man I hate being homeschooled
: Anonymous 11/24/18(Sat)12:29:05 No.785705600 >be me >be in school >teacher is 12/10 milf >give subtle hints and flirt with her >she flirts back >start to get more physical >kissing, hugging etc >one day start kissing and hugging her 40 KB PNG >she kisses back >end up banging her >her husband walks in >s---.jpg >he beats the f--- out of me and throws me out of the house Man I hate being homeschooled

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Anon discusses the history of Steam | /r/Greentext

www.FunnyPica.com Anonymous (ID: XITrghhk ) 03/09/14(Sun)18:57:27 No.536424319 Replies: >>536404991 >the birth of steam
www.FunnyPica.com Anonymous (ID: XITrghhk ) 03/09/14(Sun)18:57:27 No.536424319 Replies: >>536404991 >the birth of steam

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