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Anon is Waiting For His Nobel | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/31/20(Sat)08:53:58 No.838978048 I just had the perfect idea. >vasectomies are reversible >[lightbulb] >enforce a new law >every child with a penis and testicles over the age of 5 must have a vasectomy performed on 719 KB PNG them >the vasectomy may not be legally reversed until the child becomes an adult and deliberately decides that he wants children >reversal is free >libtards are happy because they can f--- each other day in and day out without worrying about making babies >conservatrash is happy because abortions have dropped to zero as they are now rendered obsolete >where's my nobel Thoughts?
: Anonymous 10/31/20(Sat)08:53:58 No.838978048 I just had the perfect idea. >vasectomies are reversible >[lightbulb] >enforce a new law >every child with a penis and testicles over the age of 5 must have a vasectomy performed on 719 KB PNG them >the vasectomy may not be legally reversed until the child becomes an adult and deliberately decides that he wants children >reversal is free >libtards are happy because they can f--- each other day in and day out without worrying about making babies >conservatrash is happy because abortions have dropped to zero as they are now rendered obsolete >where's my nobel Thoughts?

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Anon is a working citizen | /r/Greentext

Just got a job >20 year old autist >working drive through at mcdonalds >"I'll have 2 chicken sandwiches 1 with no tomato" >"which one do you not want tomato on?" >some brief silence and a muffled sound >"either one, man" >messed up their change ttoo
Just got a job >20 year old autist >working drive through at mcdonalds >"I'll have 2 chicken sandwiches 1 with no tomato" >"which one do you not want tomato on?" >some brief silence and a muffled sound >"either one, man" >messed up their change ttoo

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Please get some help anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/29/21(Sat)02:39:57 No.63888189 >ask woman if I can impregnate her >she refuses can I report her to the UN for genocide? 101 KB JPG : Anonymous 05/29/21(Sat)02:47:40 No.63888286 >>63888189 (OP) # the UN helps only muslims
: Anonymous 05/29/21(Sat)02:39:57 No.63888189 >ask woman if I can impregnate her >she refuses can I report her to the UN for genocide? 101 KB JPG : Anonymous 05/29/21(Sat)02:47:40 No.63888286 >>63888189 (OP) # the UN helps only muslims

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Anon is a pedo | /r/Greentext

53m · 769409498 · 3 Replies : 1 Image JPG · 35KB · (177 × 174) >Me be 19 >Live in Scandinavia >Legal consent is 15 years old >Being 15 and drinking is totally accepted, and pretty much the norm >Be able to shank 15 years old one night stands legally. TFW in the US Im an alcoholic p--------, but over here im a chad respected by everyone. Scandinavia is a haven
53m · 769409498 · 3 Replies : 1 Image JPG · 35KB · (177 × 174) >Me be 19 >Live in Scandinavia >Legal consent is 15 years old >Being 15 and drinking is totally accepted, and pretty much the norm >Be able to shank 15 years old one night stands legally. TFW in the US Im an alcoholic p--------, but over here im a chad respected by everyone. Scandinavia is a haven

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Anon gets sympathy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)21:27:11 No.84540931 still getting used up my new body... being a triple amputee sucks do not recommend 276 KB JPG 2 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)21:28:48 No.84540942S It's over op kill yourself : Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)21:28:53 No.84540943E >>845409319 (OP) # Post vid of you trying to get up the stairs
: Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)21:27:11 No.84540931 still getting used up my new body... being a triple amputee sucks do not recommend 276 KB JPG 2 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)21:28:48 No.84540942S It's over op kill yourself : Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)21:28:53 No.84540943E >>845409319 (OP) # Post vid of you trying to get up the stairs

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Anon tips big | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/11/21(Tue)16:38:33 No.63628255 >tip $1,200 to female streamer >she simply says "thx for the tip" then goes back to playing the game 78 KB JPG
: Anonymous 05/11/21(Tue)16:38:33 No.63628255 >tip $1,200 to female streamer >she simply says "thx for the tip" then goes back to playing the game 78 KB JPG

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anon belittles god | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/01/21(Tue)11:18:32 No.855828531 >wake up and left nut hurts >get out of bed >just as im about to brush my teeth, start feeling really hot >sweating profusley, blurry vision, weak arms, heart beating at 116 bpm while im 278 KB JPG still >continues while a i brush my teeth >stops once i drink a glass of water and eat breakfast >d--- pain gone now how
: Anonymous 06/01/21(Tue)11:18:32 No.855828531 >wake up and left nut hurts >get out of bed >just as im about to brush my teeth, start feeling really hot >sweating profusley, blurry vision, weak arms, heart beating at 116 bpm while im 278 KB JPG still >continues while a i brush my teeth >stops once i drink a glass of water and eat breakfast >d--- pain gone now how

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Anon doesn‘t get women | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/15/21(Thu)19:05:23 No.63225111 >you like anime? >urgh that's so creepy >*resumes 12 hour podcast about serial killer who r---- and murdered young girls before stuffing their bodies into a wood chipper* 113 KB JPG 2 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 04/15/21(Thu)19:06:58 No.63225128 >>63225111 (OP) # girls really love that serial killer stuff, maybe the cure to inceldom is to just kill people
: Anonymous 04/15/21(Thu)19:05:23 No.63225111 >you like anime? >urgh that's so creepy >*resumes 12 hour podcast about serial killer who r---- and murdered young girls before stuffing their bodies into a wood chipper* 113 KB JPG 2 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 04/15/21(Thu)19:06:58 No.63225128 >>63225111 (OP) # girls really love that serial killer stuff, maybe the cure to inceldom is to just kill people

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Anon kommits genocide | /r/Greentext

Lets get a greentext thread started, but in a german accent? >be 1895, >german peazant >life ist boring 34 KB JPG >go to prophet >she said I will be responzible für millions of zeaths >feelzbadman.png >go for walk to clear my head >approach bridge >zee woman crying >her zon ist drowning in ze river >"if Ich will kill millions of people, ich will zave zis one boy" >jump in ze river >rescue boy >mom crying tears of joy >boy caughing up wasser >ichbinhero.jpeg >his mom tells her son >"Adolf, zay danke to ze kind man". picture related
Lets get a greentext thread started, but in a german accent? >be 1895, >german peazant >life ist boring 34 KB JPG >go to prophet >she said I will be responzible für millions of zeaths >feelzbadman.png >go for walk to clear my head >approach bridge >zee woman crying >her zon ist drowning in ze river >"if Ich will kill millions of people, ich will zave zis one boy" >jump in ze river >rescue boy >mom crying tears of joy >boy caughing up wasser >ichbinhero.jpeg >his mom tells her son >"Adolf, zay danke to ze kind man". picture related

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Anon is proud to be Indian | /r/Greentext

04/18/19(Thu)10:06:27 No.210378008 British: Can u Swim? Indian: No British: Then a Dog is Better den u because it Swims. Indian: Can u Swim? 52 KB JPG British: Yes! Indian: Then Whats the Difference between u&Dog... British shocked Indian Rocks! .. Britisher: Y u indians differ in colors, look we R all white..? Abdul Kalam: Horses r in different colors but donkeys r all the same..! Send 2 all indians... : Anonymous (ID: 2TPOG4YE 04/18/19(Thu)10:07:52 No.210378105 >>210378008 (OP)_# just kys filthy pajeet When you fnd the desiyated shming street 105 KB JPG >>210378190 # >>210378317 # >>210378357 # >>210379152 # Anonymous (ID: 6G7KWHF0 04/18/19(Thu)10:09:14 No.210378190 >>210378105 # Stfu before I put my s--- covered d--- in your ass portugirl
04/18/19(Thu)10:06:27 No.210378008 British: Can u Swim? Indian: No British: Then a Dog is Better den u because it Swims. Indian: Can u Swim? 52 KB JPG British: Yes! Indian: Then Whats the Difference between u&Dog... British shocked Indian Rocks! .. Britisher: Y u indians differ in colors, look we R all white..? Abdul Kalam: Horses r in different colors but donkeys r all the same..! Send 2 all indians... : Anonymous (ID: 2TPOG4YE 04/18/19(Thu)10:07:52 No.210378105 >>210378008 (OP)_# just kys filthy pajeet When you fnd the desiyated shming street 105 KB JPG >>210378190 # >>210378317 # >>210378357 # >>210379152 # Anonymous (ID: 6G7KWHF0 04/18/19(Thu)10:09:14 No.210378190 >>210378105 # Stfu before I put my s--- covered d--- in your ass portugirl

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Anon eats cereal | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/11/18(Thu)21:23:37 No.782101531 >Be me >yesterday >bought new cereal >ffw to today >have first bowl of cereal for breakfast 150 KB PNG >go to uni >come back home >cereal box is full of ants >cereal doesn't even have sugar or anything >pour another bowl >it's f------ full of ants >pour milk and eat the ants in a fit of anger f--- you ants 2 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 10/11/18(Thu)21:23:37 No.782101531 >Be me >yesterday >bought new cereal >ffw to today >have first bowl of cereal for breakfast 150 KB PNG >go to uni >come back home >cereal box is full of ants >cereal doesn't even have sugar or anything >pour another bowl >it's f------ full of ants >pour milk and eat the ants in a fit of anger f--- you ants 2 Replies View Thread

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Anon debunks satanist | /r/Greentext

e: 1331529826 jpg-(36 KB, 400x393) Anonymous (ID: CKyXd41G) 03/12/ Ask a Satanist anything. Anonymous (ID: yulJ/KXY) 03/1 How's the 8th grade going?
e: 1331529826 jpg-(36 KB, 400x393) Anonymous (ID: CKyXd41G) 03/12/ Ask a Satanist anything. Anonymous (ID: yulJ/KXY) 03/1 How's the 8th grade going?

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Anon's priorities | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/09/21(Sun)14:28:35 No.854002332 >Be me >playing video games on Sunday night >comfy as hell >very invested in game >See a light coming through my 51 KB JPG window. >"Oh s---, I stayed up all night playing video games!" >panicking as I think about another exhausting day at work. >look out window >turns out that it's just the mushroom cloud from a nuclear warhead >crisisaverted.exe
: Anonymous 05/09/21(Sun)14:28:35 No.854002332 >Be me >playing video games on Sunday night >comfy as hell >very invested in game >See a light coming through my 51 KB JPG window. >"Oh s---, I stayed up all night playing video games!" >panicking as I think about another exhausting day at work. >look out window >turns out that it's just the mushroom cloud from a nuclear warhead >crisisaverted.exe

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Anon gives Life Advice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: kBkDrsgv 10/31/18(Wed)13:38:48 No.11591846 203949A5-02BF-4C88-93A1-CCAC4A00F4DF.jpg 157 KB JPG Stop caring. That's literally all you have to do. Just imagine this pepe everytime you get mad, sad, anxious, jealous, etc
: Anonymous (ID: kBkDrsgv 10/31/18(Wed)13:38:48 No.11591846 203949A5-02BF-4C88-93A1-CCAC4A00F4DF.jpg 157 KB JPG Stop caring. That's literally all you have to do. Just imagine this pepe everytime you get mad, sad, anxious, jealous, etc

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Anon likes feet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/30/20(Mon)02:27:08 No.15111858 Pineapplekeds.jpg 989 KB JPG Advice with these shoes. Should i just toss these? I feel like theyre too flashy : Anonymous 03/30/20(Mon)02:45:13 No.15111882 >>15111890 # : Anonymous 03/30/20(Mon)02:49:17 No. 15111890 : Anonymous 03/30/20(Mon)03:00:39 No.15111905 | Anonymous 03/30/20(Mon)03:01:09 No.15111909 >>15111858 (OP) # censoring your foot is just gonna make me hornier w----
: Anonymous 03/30/20(Mon)02:27:08 No.15111858 Pineapplekeds.jpg 989 KB JPG Advice with these shoes. Should i just toss these? I feel like theyre too flashy : Anonymous 03/30/20(Mon)02:45:13 No.15111882 >>15111890 # : Anonymous 03/30/20(Mon)02:49:17 No. 15111890 : Anonymous 03/30/20(Mon)03:00:39 No.15111905 | Anonymous 03/30/20(Mon)03:01:09 No.15111909 >>15111858 (OP) # censoring your foot is just gonna make me hornier w----

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Anon eats soap | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous i f----- up 12/21/18(Fri)23:09:45 No.49978377 >be me > in a craft shop with my mom > looking around at the s--- > see jar labeled exfoliating sugar cubes > exfoliwhatnow.png > the label has a coconut so they 102 KB PNG must be coconut flavored > take one out of jar and pop it in my mouth > shitshitshit > its hecking soap > sign right next to me says that shoplifters will be prosecuted > f--- im going to jail > have to check out with soap in my mouth > spit it out when i get off the premises > then i remember >they had video surveillance and the owner knows my mom > f---
: Anonymous i f----- up 12/21/18(Fri)23:09:45 No.49978377 >be me > in a craft shop with my mom > looking around at the s--- > see jar labeled exfoliating sugar cubes > exfoliwhatnow.png > the label has a coconut so they 102 KB PNG must be coconut flavored > take one out of jar and pop it in my mouth > shitshitshit > its hecking soap > sign right next to me says that shoplifters will be prosecuted > f--- im going to jail > have to check out with soap in my mouth > spit it out when i get off the premises > then i remember >they had video surveillance and the owner knows my mom > f---

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Anon likes Luigi’s Mansion | /r/Greentext


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Anon makes it through the storm | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/13/19(Tue)00:29:44 No.806969092 >t----- >3 years after transition >everyone is way nicer and friendlier >strangers smile and greet me when im out >co-workers like to chat with you >got bf whos very protective 275 KB GIF >dad is way more doting than before >sister comes over to visit and bake Life is good
: Anonymous 08/13/19(Tue)00:29:44 No.806969092 >t----- >3 years after transition >everyone is way nicer and friendlier >strangers smile and greet me when im out >co-workers like to chat with you >got bf whos very protective 275 KB GIF >dad is way more doting than before >sister comes over to visit and bake Life is good

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Anon discovers sexism | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: oaM30+zh 11/18/18(Sun)00:26:12 No.193822806 His ex accused him of an attack that could have meant >your ex-gf accuses you of breaking into her home, assaulting her, and carving an 'X' in her neck >police immediately arrest you and charge you with burglary and assault that can get you life in life in prison. A selfie saved him. 213 KB JPG prison >your parents get $150,000 in debt trying to hire a lawyer and post your bail >people are convinced you did it and you have no alibi to say otherwise >your mom suddenly finds a selfie pic you sent her that was dated at the time of the assault >turns out that pic clears you of all charges since it placed you away from the scene of the crime >your ex-gf gets off scott-free with no charges for lying while you had your life ruined
: Anonymous (ID: oaM30+zh 11/18/18(Sun)00:26:12 No.193822806 His ex accused him of an attack that could have meant >your ex-gf accuses you of breaking into her home, assaulting her, and carving an 'X' in her neck >police immediately arrest you and charge you with burglary and assault that can get you life in life in prison. A selfie saved him. 213 KB JPG prison >your parents get $150,000 in debt trying to hire a lawyer and post your bail >people are convinced you did it and you have no alibi to say otherwise >your mom suddenly finds a selfie pic you sent her that was dated at the time of the assault >turns out that pic clears you of all charges since it placed you away from the scene of the crime >your ex-gf gets off scott-free with no charges for lying while you had your life ruined

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Anon enjoy working | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/15/21(Mon)15:11:46 No.849659169 >be me >work as a phone salesman >95% of calls are old peope >nobody ever actually buys anything >get paid per time spent in calls >most old people are lonely and 110 KB PNG just want to talk >talk to old people about how they water their plants for hours >basically everyone at my job just talks to old people for 12 hours a day >even have regular callers that know us by names >supposed to advertise products but i actually just talk to grandma Lauren every day for 8 hours about how she used to live back in the day >she appears to forget what she said, repeats the same thing 10s of times. >my job is basically to register when Lauren made a pause in her speech and say "Very interesting, keep going"
: Anonymous 03/15/21(Mon)15:11:46 No.849659169 >be me >work as a phone salesman >95% of calls are old peope >nobody ever actually buys anything >get paid per time spent in calls >most old people are lonely and 110 KB PNG just want to talk >talk to old people about how they water their plants for hours >basically everyone at my job just talks to old people for 12 hours a day >even have regular callers that know us by names >supposed to advertise products but i actually just talk to grandma Lauren every day for 8 hours about how she used to live back in the day >she appears to forget what she said, repeats the same thing 10s of times. >my job is basically to register when Lauren made a pause in her speech and say "Very interesting, keep going"

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