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Anon discribes modern society | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)02:48:17 No.61889767 >>61889332 (OP) # >feet f----- from shoes >penis f----- from circumcision >posture f----- from sitting >jaw f----- from soft foods >eyes f----- from computers 555 KB PNG >teeth f----- from sugar >skin f----- from shaving >scalp f----- from shampoo >hormones f----- from p--- >freedom f----- from governments >lungs f----- from pollution >immune system f----- from medicine >women f----- from makeup >>61889889 # >>61889954 # >>61890451 # >>61890476 # >>61890640 # >>61892494 # >>61892679 # >>61892718 # >>61894050 # >>61895101 # >>61895159 # >>61897290 # >>61897405 # >>61897424 # >>61900124 # >>61900313 #
: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)02:48:17 No.61889767 >>61889332 (OP) # >feet f----- from shoes >penis f----- from circumcision >posture f----- from sitting >jaw f----- from soft foods >eyes f----- from computers 555 KB PNG >teeth f----- from sugar >skin f----- from shaving >scalp f----- from shampoo >hormones f----- from p--- >freedom f----- from governments >lungs f----- from pollution >immune system f----- from medicine >women f----- from makeup >>61889889 # >>61889954 # >>61890451 # >>61890476 # >>61890640 # >>61892494 # >>61892679 # >>61892718 # >>61894050 # >>61895101 # >>61895159 # >>61897290 # >>61897405 # >>61897424 # >>61900124 # >>61900313 #

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Oh Wow, a Fantasy RPG With Dozens of Races!

10 /413 v Oh wow, a fantasy rpg game with dozens of races >Race: human, white >Sex: male >Class: knight with a longsword Time to game.
10 /413 v Oh wow, a fantasy rpg game with dozens of races >Race: human, white >Sex: male >Class: knight with a longsword Time to game.

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anon goes on a date | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/17/19(Sun)08:24:14 No.51022884 >on date with qt boy >we get indian food >he orders chicken korma with rice >"i can't eat rice, it reminds me of maggots" >"oh really, anon? that's... interesting" >"yeah, when i have rice in my mouth i just think of that video with the guy with maggot invested gums" 10 KB JPG >"i've never seen that" >show him the video >he excuses himself and goes to the bathroom >ten minutes later i ask a male waiter to check on him >"there's no one in the bathroom, miss" >mfw why do i always sabotage myself like this? why can't i just be normal?
: Anonymous 02/17/19(Sun)08:24:14 No.51022884 >on date with qt boy >we get indian food >he orders chicken korma with rice >"i can't eat rice, it reminds me of maggots" >"oh really, anon? that's... interesting" >"yeah, when i have rice in my mouth i just think of that video with the guy with maggot invested gums" 10 KB JPG >"i've never seen that" >show him the video >he excuses himself and goes to the bathroom >ten minutes later i ask a male waiter to check on him >"there's no one in the bathroom, miss" >mfw why do i always sabotage myself like this? why can't i just be normal?

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Yes Anon, How may I fuck your Ass? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/29/21(Sat)06:53:00 No.151576002 >You thinking what im thinking? >Yeah *smiles* >Hard cut to gay a--- sex with spanking and he c--- in his ass 129 KB PNG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 05/29/21 (Sat)06:59:19 No.151576201 >welcome to starbucks sir what is your orde- >fade into sex dungeon furry ball torture
: Anonymous 05/29/21(Sat)06:53:00 No.151576002 >You thinking what im thinking? >Yeah *smiles* >Hard cut to gay a--- sex with spanking and he c--- in his ass 129 KB PNG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 05/29/21 (Sat)06:59:19 No.151576201 >welcome to starbucks sir what is your orde- >fade into sex dungeon furry ball torture

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Anon falls for a practical joke | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/13/18(Sat)09:06:41 No.10531852 >walking home at night >pass a group of youths >one of them tells me I dropped my gay card >I look down for it and 71 KB JPG realise l've been the victim of a practical joke >l am unmoved, I tell the youth that his provocations are futile because I am a stoic >he bursts out laughing and says it's pronounced stow-ic, not stoike >break down and cry in the street >>10532164 # >>10532217 # >>10532453 # >>10532459 并
: Anonymous 01/13/18(Sat)09:06:41 No.10531852 >walking home at night >pass a group of youths >one of them tells me I dropped my gay card >I look down for it and 71 KB JPG realise l've been the victim of a practical joke >l am unmoved, I tell the youth that his provocations are futile because I am a stoic >he bursts out laughing and says it's pronounced stow-ic, not stoike >break down and cry in the street >>10532164 # >>10532217 # >>10532453 # >>10532459 并

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Anon need to go toilet | /r/Greentext

>the toilet tyrant isn't letting me take a s--- again >haven't taken a s--- in weeks
>the toilet tyrant isn't letting me take a s--- again >haven't taken a s--- in weeks

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I post the frog | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/13/20(Sun)18:54:51 No.613E >l post the frog >they see the frog and get mad >they say mean things to me >l get sad >i want to feel happy again >frog makes me happy >l post the frog 61 KB JPG
Anonymous 12/13/20(Sun)18:54:51 No.613E >l post the frog >they see the frog and get mad >they say mean things to me >l get sad >i want to feel happy again >frog makes me happy >l post the frog 61 KB JPG

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Anon has the most autistic moment in his life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/06/19(Wed)17:42:29 No.50829211 this happened a few years ago >have a crush on girl >manage to get her over to my house to watch a movie >we're both on the couch watching it >she grabs my arm and wraps it 40 KB JPG around her so we're cuddled together and she starts leaning into me more >just stay like that for a while, feels good >at some point she gets up and goes to the bathroom >when she comes back to the bathroom i look up and see she doesn't have a shirt or bra on >her t------ are just... right there and she's looking right at me >brain completely freezes and i'm totally confused >i give her a f------ thumbs up and say nice t--- then go back to watching the movie >she stands there for a few seconds then goes back to the bathroom and puts her bra and shirt back on and watches the rest of the movie like nothing happened i think that is the most autistic moment in my life View Thread
: Anonymous 02/06/19(Wed)17:42:29 No.50829211 this happened a few years ago >have a crush on girl >manage to get her over to my house to watch a movie >we're both on the couch watching it >she grabs my arm and wraps it 40 KB JPG around her so we're cuddled together and she starts leaning into me more >just stay like that for a while, feels good >at some point she gets up and goes to the bathroom >when she comes back to the bathroom i look up and see she doesn't have a shirt or bra on >her t------ are just... right there and she's looking right at me >brain completely freezes and i'm totally confused >i give her a f------ thumbs up and say nice t--- then go back to watching the movie >she stands there for a few seconds then goes back to the bathroom and puts her bra and shirt back on and watches the rest of the movie like nothing happened i think that is the most autistic moment in my life View Thread

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Anon questions /fit/ | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)20:22:49 No.61900936 >You WILL drink the water >You WILL eat the chicken >You WILL abstain from carbs >You WILL have no free time >You WILL live a miserable life Why are /fit/f--- like this? 16 KB PNG
: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)20:22:49 No.61900936 >You WILL drink the water >You WILL eat the chicken >You WILL abstain from carbs >You WILL have no free time >You WILL live a miserable life Why are /fit/f--- like this? 16 KB PNG

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Anon ponders suicide | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/13/18(Thu)22:45:16 No.49824266 >buy chemicals for a peaceful suicide >they all arrive >have everything ready >suddenly feel happy >not even sure l want to kill myself 13 KB JPG anymore >the fake smile I put on turns into a real one >start enjoying life and treating people nice What the f--- is happening?
: Anonymous 12/13/18(Thu)22:45:16 No.49824266 >buy chemicals for a peaceful suicide >they all arrive >have everything ready >suddenly feel happy >not even sure l want to kill myself 13 KB JPG anymore >the fake smile I put on turns into a real one >start enjoying life and treating people nice What the f--- is happening?

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Anon gets backfired | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous (ID: PtowQKud) 03/09/20(Mon)22:03:13 No.247294862 >247294935 WRTOH OUT >>247295044 >>247295084 >>247295127 >>247295906 >>247296042 >>247296832 >>247297042 >>247297305 >>247297334 >>247297437 >>247297491 >>247297634 >>247297739 >>247297886 >>247297950 >>247298451 >247298826 >>247299016 >>247299368 >>247299587 >>247299715 HERE COMES R >the meme that finally brought down Trump JOEPEDO! >> O Anonymous (ID: CMcTDSr >>247296832 >>247297136 >>247297394 >>247297812 >>247299016 >247299040 >>247299115 >>247299194 >>247299270 >>247299368 File: 237AB6A5-746D-42CE-B957-1(...).jpg (3 KB, 125x119) • 03/09/20(Mon)22:05:01 No.247295044 >>247295159 >>247295629 >>247295685 >>247296586 >>247296818 >>247294862 (OP) > Joe >P--- Ahahahahahahahahaha O Anonymous (ID: PtowQKud) 03/09/20(Mon)22:05:56 No.247295159 ► >>247296818 >>247296832 >>247297834 >>247298392 >>247295044 no not like that O Anonymous (ID: PtowQKud ) 03/09/20(Mon)22:15:17 No.247296235 D>>247296329 >>247296657 >>247296786 >>247296832 >>247296996 >>247297164 >>247297205 >>247297294 >>247297576 >>247297990 >>247298981 >>247299159 >>247299368 how do I delete the thread how do I delete the thread
O Anonymous (ID: PtowQKud) 03/09/20(Mon)22:03:13 No.247294862 >247294935 WRTOH OUT >>247295044 >>247295084 >>247295127 >>247295906 >>247296042 >>247296832 >>247297042 >>247297305 >>247297334 >>247297437 >>247297491 >>247297634 >>247297739 >>247297886 >>247297950 >>247298451 >247298826 >>247299016 >>247299368 >>247299587 >>247299715 HERE COMES R >the meme that finally brought down Trump JOEPEDO! >> O Anonymous (ID: CMcTDSr >>247296832 >>247297136 >>247297394 >>247297812 >>247299016 >247299040 >>247299115 >>247299194 >>247299270 >>247299368 File: 237AB6A5-746D-42CE-B957-1(...).jpg (3 KB, 125x119) • 03/09/20(Mon)22:05:01 No.247295044 >>247295159 >>247295629 >>247295685 >>247296586 >>247296818 >>247294862 (OP) > Joe >P--- Ahahahahahahahahaha O Anonymous (ID: PtowQKud) 03/09/20(Mon)22:05:56 No.247295159 ► >>247296818 >>247296832 >>247297834 >>247298392 >>247295044 no not like that O Anonymous (ID: PtowQKud ) 03/09/20(Mon)22:15:17 No.247296235 D>>247296329 >>247296657 >>247296786 >>247296832 >>247296996 >>247297164 >>247297205 >>247297294 >>247297576 >>247297990 >>247298981 >>247299159 >>247299368 how do I delete the thread how do I delete the thread

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Anon has good teeth | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/13/21(Tue)03:11:10 No.63188016 >never ever flossed my teeth >not even once >go to the dentist >"i see youve been flossing, your gums are in perfect health, keep it up" 4 KB PNG
: Anonymous 04/13/21(Tue)03:11:10 No.63188016 >never ever flossed my teeth >not even once >go to the dentist >"i see youve been flossing, your gums are in perfect health, keep it up" 4 KB PNG

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Anon respects his mom's wishes | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/03/18(Mon)16:37:50 No.19683115 Here's a story for y'all >Be me >Just turned 17 >Live alone with bitch mom >Just got driver's license >Buying car >Despite the fact that I'm paying for insurance, gas, upkeep and the car itself out of pocket, mom still wants to 22 KB JPG restrict my buying >Says it has to have automatic transmission and be at least as big as her car (grocery getter hatchback) so that she can borrow it or ask me to do s--- for her with it >Asyouwish.ogg >Start trawling craigslist >Find '85 GMC Suburban with 6" lift, bigass offroad inner tube tires and body rot like no tomorrow >It's got an automatic and is definitely bigger than my mom's car >Listed for $1500 because of the body rot >Go to see it, of course the frame is fine because it's a GM, and it's generally sound otherwise and runs/drives fine >Smokes like a California wildfire but doesn't have to pass smog because it's too old >Talk idiot seller down to $1250 and take the truck home that day >Mom of course flips her s--- but can't tell me to take it back because it was a CL sale, and can't tell me to get rid of it because no dealer will take it, she doesn't let me sell stuff online, and she doesn't know how to do so herself >MFW that truck was and is the best purchase l've ever made >Could haul 8 of my friends plus myself easily >Used it to move to college >Drove across the country twice and slept in it >Never had to worry about weather >Offroaded it with some regularity, fun as f--- and never gave me trouble >Was both reliable as hell and easy to work on/find parts for >MFW I'm 23 and still driving it >MFW my mom never once borrowed it or made me do s--- with it How have you cheated the system, /o/tists?
: Anonymous 09/03/18(Mon)16:37:50 No.19683115 Here's a story for y'all >Be me >Just turned 17 >Live alone with bitch mom >Just got driver's license >Buying car >Despite the fact that I'm paying for insurance, gas, upkeep and the car itself out of pocket, mom still wants to 22 KB JPG restrict my buying >Says it has to have automatic transmission and be at least as big as her car (grocery getter hatchback) so that she can borrow it or ask me to do s--- for her with it >Asyouwish.ogg >Start trawling craigslist >Find '85 GMC Suburban with 6" lift, bigass offroad inner tube tires and body rot like no tomorrow >It's got an automatic and is definitely bigger than my mom's car >Listed for $1500 because of the body rot >Go to see it, of course the frame is fine because it's a GM, and it's generally sound otherwise and runs/drives fine >Smokes like a California wildfire but doesn't have to pass smog because it's too old >Talk idiot seller down to $1250 and take the truck home that day >Mom of course flips her s--- but can't tell me to take it back because it was a CL sale, and can't tell me to get rid of it because no dealer will take it, she doesn't let me sell stuff online, and she doesn't know how to do so herself >MFW that truck was and is the best purchase l've ever made >Could haul 8 of my friends plus myself easily >Used it to move to college >Drove across the country twice and slept in it >Never had to worry about weather >Offroaded it with some regularity, fun as f--- and never gave me trouble >Was both reliable as hell and easy to work on/find parts for >MFW I'm 23 and still driving it >MFW my mom never once borrowed it or made me do s--- with it How have you cheated the system, /o/tists?

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Anon loves his mom | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/03/18(Sun)09:54:07 No.11260164 >my mom left school at 16 due to poverty >never showed much interest in books, music etc >retired last year >has since been reading 53 KB JPG through all the books I left in boxes at home >her enthusiasm for reading is so pure I feel bad for not enjoying reading that much these days >she kept asking me if I was writing a book and said she could "never do that" >picked up the hint and encouraged her to give it a go, without getting my hopes up >ffw she sent me a story she wrote about two rabbits who become friends >ffw it made me cry and feels more honest than anything I've written How to cope with this feel bros? I love my mum so much.
: Anonymous 06/03/18(Sun)09:54:07 No.11260164 >my mom left school at 16 due to poverty >never showed much interest in books, music etc >retired last year >has since been reading 53 KB JPG through all the books I left in boxes at home >her enthusiasm for reading is so pure I feel bad for not enjoying reading that much these days >she kept asking me if I was writing a book and said she could "never do that" >picked up the hint and encouraged her to give it a go, without getting my hopes up >ffw she sent me a story she wrote about two rabbits who become friends >ffw it made me cry and feels more honest than anything I've written How to cope with this feel bros? I love my mum so much.

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Anon probably has early onset dementia | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/20/18(Tue)10:46:25 No.763253195 i f----- up big time boys >be me happily married for 6 years >wife and i call eachother cute pet names more than our real names >introduce us both at a function >"i'm anon and this is my wife...uh..." >sweetfuckingchrist.jpeg 58 KB JPG >tfw i don't remember her name >mfw she's making me sleep in the backyard how do i recover guys please help me
: Anonymous 03/20/18(Tue)10:46:25 No.763253195 i f----- up big time boys >be me happily married for 6 years >wife and i call eachother cute pet names more than our real names >introduce us both at a function >"i'm anon and this is my wife...uh..." >sweetfuckingchrist.jpeg 58 KB JPG >tfw i don't remember her name >mfw she's making me sleep in the backyard how do i recover guys please help me

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Anon watches a movie | /r/Greentext

>be me >be in 7th grade >obsessed with the movie fight club >start pretending to fight myself because autism >people at school ask why i have bruises 143 KB JPG >tell them i got into fight >with who? >tell them im not gonna snitch >people believe me >ffw people start to think im a little bit cooler due to autism
>be me >be in 7th grade >obsessed with the movie fight club >start pretending to fight myself because autism >people at school ask why i have bruises 143 KB JPG >tell them i got into fight >with who? >tell them im not gonna snitch >people believe me >ffw people start to think im a little bit cooler due to autism

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Anon needed to fart | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Sat 28 Dec 2019 14:14:17 No.817176079 View Quoted By: >>817176124 >>817176178 > On the train to London > Really need to fart > Starting to hurt a bit > Starting to hurt a lot > Train shakes a little, want get up to go to the bathroom before I f------ burst > Don't get the chance, my sphincter can no longer take the strain > Manage to discreetly edge my buttcheeks apart, comes out slowly but silently > Pass gas for a Solid 60 seconds > Oh no > Oh god the f------ smell People are looking at each other > It's really f------ bad. > enemyspotted.jpeg > A foreign smell impacts my nostrils > The dude opposite me is staring me right in the eyes > He f------ knows, and ripped one of his own > It's f------ on > Spread the cheeks a little wider, much as I dare > Push > Clearly and loudly s--- myself staring into the eyes of a complete stranger. What's your commute like /b/?
Anonymous Sat 28 Dec 2019 14:14:17 No.817176079 View Quoted By: >>817176124 >>817176178 > On the train to London > Really need to fart > Starting to hurt a bit > Starting to hurt a lot > Train shakes a little, want get up to go to the bathroom before I f------ burst > Don't get the chance, my sphincter can no longer take the strain > Manage to discreetly edge my buttcheeks apart, comes out slowly but silently > Pass gas for a Solid 60 seconds > Oh no > Oh god the f------ smell People are looking at each other > It's really f------ bad. > enemyspotted.jpeg > A foreign smell impacts my nostrils > The dude opposite me is staring me right in the eyes > He f------ knows, and ripped one of his own > It's f------ on > Spread the cheeks a little wider, much as I dare > Push > Clearly and loudly s--- myself staring into the eyes of a complete stranger. What's your commute like /b/?

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Anon does a little trolling | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous 12/21/19(Sat)10:18:04 No.816697201 >t----- >bike home from work >ride past a group of teen-agers >get wolf-wistled at >turn around and yell "ew thats gay" in my manliest voice >bike away while his friends laugh 40 KB JPG at him 1 Reply / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 12/21/19(Sat)10:25:53 No.816697581 >>816697201 (OP) # Man gay L Trap Scare Shi kek 149 KB JPG
| Anonymous 12/21/19(Sat)10:18:04 No.816697201 >t----- >bike home from work >ride past a group of teen-agers >get wolf-wistled at >turn around and yell "ew thats gay" in my manliest voice >bike away while his friends laugh 40 KB JPG at him 1 Reply / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 12/21/19(Sat)10:25:53 No.816697581 >>816697201 (OP) # Man gay L Trap Scare Shi kek 149 KB JPG

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Anon meets a girl on tinder | /r/Greentext

>be me >24yo anon >meet girl on tinder >she's super cute >possiblegf.jpeg >not sure what a 9/10 is 59 KB PNG doing with me >i'm a total 3/10 >have amazing sex >afterwards ask her what my appeal was >"oh my stepdad was really fat so it's sort of my fetish" >mfw
>be me >24yo anon >meet girl on tinder >she's super cute >possiblegf.jpeg >not sure what a 9/10 is 59 KB PNG doing with me >i'm a total 3/10 >have amazing sex >afterwards ask her what my appeal was >"oh my stepdad was really fat so it's sort of my fetish" >mfw

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Anon cares about his father | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/26/21(Fri)06:13:10 No.62918674 >dad is obese >eat all the sweets he buys to save him 75 KB JPG : Anonymous 03/26/21(Fri)06:46:37 No.62919028 >>62918674 (OP) # you could just throw the candy out. >>62919158 #
: Anonymous 03/26/21(Fri)06:13:10 No.62918674 >dad is obese >eat all the sweets he buys to save him 75 KB JPG : Anonymous 03/26/21(Fri)06:46:37 No.62919028 >>62918674 (OP) # you could just throw the candy out. >>62919158 #

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