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Anon gets existential | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:56:11 No.857815440 >be you >be born as an innocent child >ffw many years >gathered hundreds, thousands of memories >be on /b/ 10 KB JPG >reading this post >the entirety of your life thus far has culminated into this one moment, reading a meta post on a website filled with p---, pedophiles, and criminally insane autists how does it feel, anon? : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:56:59 No.857815495 : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:57:38 No.857815534 : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:57:43 No.857815542 >>857815440 (OP) # Seeing as I'm one of the pedos? Just fine.
: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:56:11 No.857815440 >be you >be born as an innocent child >ffw many years >gathered hundreds, thousands of memories >be on /b/ 10 KB JPG >reading this post >the entirety of your life thus far has culminated into this one moment, reading a meta post on a website filled with p---, pedophiles, and criminally insane autists how does it feel, anon? : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:56:59 No.857815495 : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:57:38 No.857815534 : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:57:43 No.857815542 >>857815440 (OP) # Seeing as I'm one of the pedos? Just fine.

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Anon let's an anime character use the loo | /r/Greentext


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Anon hires a hooker | /r/Greentext

Fastest Eti 4G 5:33 AM O n 96% A boards.4chan.org Board /b/ - Random v Settings Mobile Home f v7-VIDEO GAMES ©2004 Moof : Anonymous 06/28/21(Mon)05:12:26 No.857820494 >be me >23 yo virgin >sick of being a virgin >order a h----- online >lives 5 miles away >she arrives and we're walking to my bedroom when she sees my 120 KB PNG bird room >she asks about my conure budgies and cockatiels >instead of banging we talk about birds and random s--- for 2 hours >she leaves without banging >still virgin >ffw 1 week >i get a knock on the door >its her >i invite her in and ask her why she's here >she says her pimp got shot and thinks im cute so she wants to stay with me >i say ok >ffw 2 years >married with 2 kids, 7 birds i sill get to bang her 3 Replies / 2 Images View Thread
Fastest Eti 4G 5:33 AM O n 96% A boards.4chan.org Board /b/ - Random v Settings Mobile Home f v7-VIDEO GAMES ©2004 Moof : Anonymous 06/28/21(Mon)05:12:26 No.857820494 >be me >23 yo virgin >sick of being a virgin >order a h----- online >lives 5 miles away >she arrives and we're walking to my bedroom when she sees my 120 KB PNG bird room >she asks about my conure budgies and cockatiels >instead of banging we talk about birds and random s--- for 2 hours >she leaves without banging >still virgin >ffw 1 week >i get a knock on the door >its her >i invite her in and ask her why she's here >she says her pimp got shot and thinks im cute so she wants to stay with me >i say ok >ffw 2 years >married with 2 kids, 7 birds i sill get to bang her 3 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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Anon is really sad | /r/Greentext

>be me >on discord with the people that ghosted me >having the best time of my life >wakes up >mfw
>be me >on discord with the people that ghosted me >having the best time of my life >wakes up >mfw

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anon is an alcoholic | /r/Greentext

Rectangular Area File: martin luther FEEL,jpg (45 KB, 640x432) Last Rectangular Area Full Screen (All Monitors) THAT FEEL, THAT FEEL O Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)16:12:36 No.64331961 [Reply] ► >>64332140 nt Screen Active Window >wake up this morning with an overwhelming desire to KYS >just the most awful feeling of overwhelming angst and self-hate that the english language can't even begin to articulate >stare at .38 revolver >put it to me head, turn the safety off >tears begin to stream down my face, put the gun down GOD ALMIGHTY, I KNOW THAT FEEL >can't do it because I can't put my mom through this >decide to down like 8-10 shots of vodka at once (chugged straight from the bottle) >no longer feel like s--- anyone know this feel?
Rectangular Area File: martin luther FEEL,jpg (45 KB, 640x432) Last Rectangular Area Full Screen (All Monitors) THAT FEEL, THAT FEEL O Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)16:12:36 No.64331961 [Reply] ► >>64332140 nt Screen Active Window >wake up this morning with an overwhelming desire to KYS >just the most awful feeling of overwhelming angst and self-hate that the english language can't even begin to articulate >stare at .38 revolver >put it to me head, turn the safety off >tears begin to stream down my face, put the gun down GOD ALMIGHTY, I KNOW THAT FEEL >can't do it because I can't put my mom through this >decide to down like 8-10 shots of vodka at once (chugged straight from the bottle) >no longer feel like s--- anyone know this feel?

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Anon feels weird. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)15:42:05 No.64332245 >Mom wants me to rub some weird smelly cream on her back >Say OK and go grab some gloves because dad said this s---'s smell doesn't wash off easily >"No, I don't want to feel plastic gloves on my skin!!" >After a bit of arguing she says "If you're not going to do it with your bare hands I'll do it myself" 27 KB JPG >Say OK and go out of the room ffw 1 dau >She's very mad and giving me the cold shoulder >"If you truly loved me you wouldn't have needed gloves" >All attempts to communicate with her are met with one-word aggressive responses Are all moms like this, anons? Did I really commit a sin for wanting to grab some plastic gloves?
: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)15:42:05 No.64332245 >Mom wants me to rub some weird smelly cream on her back >Say OK and go grab some gloves because dad said this s---'s smell doesn't wash off easily >"No, I don't want to feel plastic gloves on my skin!!" >After a bit of arguing she says "If you're not going to do it with your bare hands I'll do it myself" 27 KB JPG >Say OK and go out of the room ffw 1 dau >She's very mad and giving me the cold shoulder >"If you truly loved me you wouldn't have needed gloves" >All attempts to communicate with her are met with one-word aggressive responses Are all moms like this, anons? Did I really commit a sin for wanting to grab some plastic gloves?

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Anon takes the elevator | /r/Greentext

>> Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)23:21:26 No.62285867 >>62285886 >>62285815 >in elevator >cute girl next to me >turn to tell her I like her hair >misspeak and say 'I like your head' >she hurriedly exits the elevator when the door opens
>> Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)23:21:26 No.62285867 >>62285886 >>62285815 >in elevator >cute girl next to me >turn to tell her I like her hair >misspeak and say 'I like your head' >she hurriedly exits the elevator when the door opens

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Anon declares bankruptcy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: G8UBFXFT) 06/26/21(Sat)09:22:03 No.327546070 >>327543042 (OP)_# >Be Amerimutt in early 2020 >Have health insurance tied to employment >Pandemic hits 24 KB JPG >Lose job because Government shuts down the economy >Get covid and nearly die on a ventilator >Finally recover after 4 months >See hospital bill, $1,000,000 >No longer have health insurance because of lost job >Declare bankruptcy and become homeless Such is life in muttland
: Anonymous (ID: G8UBFXFT) 06/26/21(Sat)09:22:03 No.327546070 >>327543042 (OP)_# >Be Amerimutt in early 2020 >Have health insurance tied to employment >Pandemic hits 24 KB JPG >Lose job because Government shuts down the economy >Get covid and nearly die on a ventilator >Finally recover after 4 months >See hospital bill, $1,000,000 >No longer have health insurance because of lost job >Declare bankruptcy and become homeless Such is life in muttland

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Anon lacks braincells | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 856676925 1 hr ago •• Why am I so retarded? >have to do a proficiency test for work to show that I am not too retarded to work with the machinery I work with >test was today at 2pm >waiting >gets to 2:30pm >decide l'm not going to let them walk all 42.7 kB PNG over me >p----- off I speak to the guy running the test centre >"my test was at 2, l've been waiting around like some kind of dumbass an-" >"what's your name?" >"anon" >"your test is in a month, you must have read it as june instead of july" >look at the letter they sent me >it says july not a great story but wanted to vent to a fren
Anonymous | 856676925 1 hr ago •• Why am I so retarded? >have to do a proficiency test for work to show that I am not too retarded to work with the machinery I work with >test was today at 2pm >waiting >gets to 2:30pm >decide l'm not going to let them walk all 42.7 kB PNG over me >p----- off I speak to the guy running the test centre >"my test was at 2, l've been waiting around like some kind of dumbass an-" >"what's your name?" >"anon" >"your test is in a month, you must have read it as june instead of july" >look at the letter they sent me >it says july not a great story but wanted to vent to a fren

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Anon found a woman | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)13:37:01 No.64331278 >be me >21 khhv >meet qt3.14 online >she's even better irl >we're basically the same just in different genders >2. Date we Kiss >butterfliesinstomachhappyfeeling.jpg >3. Date am to afraid to kiss her again so I just kiss her awkwardly when saying goodbye 670 KB GIF >she doesn't answer me now >she f------ doesn't answer me now Am I destined to fail? Why do I f--- up all the good things that happen to me in life please someone tell me you had the same situation but made a comeback and got your happy end 11 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)13:58:38 No.64331415 >>64331355 # >She's perfect >l don't want anyone else >Why then even bother living She's not perfect. You're ignoring her flaws because of the halo effect. If she's like you, as you claim, she sounds like a DUMB P------------. Find an ugly woman and you will be happy.
: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)13:37:01 No.64331278 >be me >21 khhv >meet qt3.14 online >she's even better irl >we're basically the same just in different genders >2. Date we Kiss >butterfliesinstomachhappyfeeling.jpg >3. Date am to afraid to kiss her again so I just kiss her awkwardly when saying goodbye 670 KB GIF >she doesn't answer me now >she f------ doesn't answer me now Am I destined to fail? Why do I f--- up all the good things that happen to me in life please someone tell me you had the same situation but made a comeback and got your happy end 11 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)13:58:38 No.64331415 >>64331355 # >She's perfect >l don't want anyone else >Why then even bother living She's not perfect. You're ignoring her flaws because of the halo effect. If she's like you, as you claim, she sounds like a DUMB P------------. Find an ugly woman and you will be happy.

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Anon wants food | /r/Greentext


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Anon life is ruined | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: peXrldyn )9 4chan has ruined my relationsh(...) 06/27/21(Sun)17:05:44 No.327706082 >Hang around cute girl >She starts getting flirty with me >Start to have genuine feelings for her >Suddenly every single redpill about women flashes past my 24 KB JPG eyes >Broken families, divorce rates, "body counts", Onlyfans, whoredom, etc >Bitter seething hatred completely obliterates those burgeoning emotions >Break ties before anything serious can happen F--- you all, you've ruined the way I see women forever and I want to go back : Anonymous (ID: OTBLIXYG ) E 06/27/21(Sun)17:07:04 No.327706175 >>327706082(OP) # Hey, don't blame /pol/ for what your brain's doing >>327706305 # >>327712866 # : Anonymous (ID: 2fnzTjrR) 06/27/21(Sun)17:07:40 No.327706210 >>327706082(OP) # Brain vs penis. Who wins? >>327706553 # >>327707158 # >>327707590 # >>327707659 # >>327709930 # >>327711567 #
: Anonymous (ID: peXrldyn )9 4chan has ruined my relationsh(...) 06/27/21(Sun)17:05:44 No.327706082 >Hang around cute girl >She starts getting flirty with me >Start to have genuine feelings for her >Suddenly every single redpill about women flashes past my 24 KB JPG eyes >Broken families, divorce rates, "body counts", Onlyfans, whoredom, etc >Bitter seething hatred completely obliterates those burgeoning emotions >Break ties before anything serious can happen F--- you all, you've ruined the way I see women forever and I want to go back : Anonymous (ID: OTBLIXYG ) E 06/27/21(Sun)17:07:04 No.327706175 >>327706082(OP) # Hey, don't blame /pol/ for what your brain's doing >>327706305 # >>327712866 # : Anonymous (ID: 2fnzTjrR) 06/27/21(Sun)17:07:40 No.327706210 >>327706082(OP) # Brain vs penis. Who wins? >>327706553 # >>327707158 # >>327707590 # >>327707659 # >>327709930 # >>327711567 #

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Anon bought a gamecube | /r/Greentext


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Anon tries to be cool | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)13:44:13 No.64330878 >be me >middle school >no friends >join "coding club" to find "friends" >just a bunch of people a year younger than me dipshitting with scratch, for some reason we had to 214 КВ ЈPG watch Spare Parts every other fucken week >idk teacher that ran it was some whale of a Canadian bitch who was the humanities teacher >never interact with any of them >one day we are allowed to request songs to play through the classroom speakers >me, an absolute and utter connisuer of music, immediately cut everybody off and request I Keep Holding On by Dr >Keep in mind this is a completely stagnant room of laconic borderline autistic middle schoolers >approaching the bass drop I say out loud to nobody "It's a proven fact that listening to dubstep makes you better at gaming" >one kid tells me I am retarded >Canadian bitch can't stand the music and turns it off halfway through >go to a different school the next week
: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)13:44:13 No.64330878 >be me >middle school >no friends >join "coding club" to find "friends" >just a bunch of people a year younger than me dipshitting with scratch, for some reason we had to 214 КВ ЈPG watch Spare Parts every other fucken week >idk teacher that ran it was some whale of a Canadian bitch who was the humanities teacher >never interact with any of them >one day we are allowed to request songs to play through the classroom speakers >me, an absolute and utter connisuer of music, immediately cut everybody off and request I Keep Holding On by Dr >Keep in mind this is a completely stagnant room of laconic borderline autistic middle schoolers >approaching the bass drop I say out loud to nobody "It's a proven fact that listening to dubstep makes you better at gaming" >one kid tells me I am retarded >Canadian bitch can't stand the music and turns it off halfway through >go to a different school the next week

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Churchill Downs | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/31/20(Thu)19:37:09 No.59126160 >wife has our 2nd kid >belly starts looking like this >accidentally refer to her tummy as 'Winston Churchill' when I am kissing it >only way to make her think its not 285 KB JPG cos it looks like an old wrinkled man is to tell her I find him sexually attractive >she has been dressing as him for 2 months now to have sex with me >am starting to actually find him hot >>59126193 # >>59126202 # >>59126837 # >>59127439 # >>59128547 # >>59128577 # >>59129694 # >>59138374 # >>59142250 #
: Anonymous 12/31/20(Thu)19:37:09 No.59126160 >wife has our 2nd kid >belly starts looking like this >accidentally refer to her tummy as 'Winston Churchill' when I am kissing it >only way to make her think its not 285 KB JPG cos it looks like an old wrinkled man is to tell her I find him sexually attractive >she has been dressing as him for 2 months now to have sex with me >am starting to actually find him hot >>59126193 # >>59126202 # >>59126837 # >>59127439 # >>59128547 # >>59128577 # >>59129694 # >>59138374 # >>59142250 #

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Anon is hungry | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)09:21:18 No.16328452 I am so f------ hungry bros 26 KB JPG : Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)09:25:47 No.16328470 >l'm hungry >better make a s--- thread instead of eating something >>16328512 # : Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)09:34:33 No.16328512 >>16328470 # thanks for your help, I guess l'll just eat this cat poop >>16328541 # >>16328543 # >>16328889 #
: Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)09:21:18 No.16328452 I am so f------ hungry bros 26 KB JPG : Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)09:25:47 No.16328470 >l'm hungry >better make a s--- thread instead of eating something >>16328512 # : Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)09:34:33 No.16328512 >>16328470 # thanks for your help, I guess l'll just eat this cat poop >>16328541 # >>16328543 # >>16328889 #

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Anon is confused | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)22:12:21 No.64326965 >girl matches with me on tinder >message her >she never replies ????????? ?????????????? 88 KB PNG
: Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)22:12:21 No.64326965 >girl matches with me on tinder >message her >she never replies ????????? ?????????????? 88 KB PNG

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Anon wants a boyfriend | /r/Greentext

File: A5F96750-49D0-40C7-817C-3(..).png (73 KB, 372x374) O Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)22:45:22 No.64324383 >>64324400 >>6432441 >have a crush on r9k guy >talk for a few months >things go nice but I push him away because autism >still like him >try and talk to him again >now he has a gf Every time Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)22:46:30 No.64324400 >>64324499 >>64324383 (OP) >Has a So just one of the lurking chads huh?
File: A5F96750-49D0-40C7-817C-3(..).png (73 KB, 372x374) O Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)22:45:22 No.64324383 >>64324400 >>6432441 >have a crush on r9k guy >talk for a few months >things go nice but I push him away because autism >still like him >try and talk to him again >now he has a gf Every time Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)22:46:30 No.64324400 >>64324499 >>64324383 (OP) >Has a So just one of the lurking chads huh?

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Anon plays with his friends | /r/Greentext


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Anon has shitty memory | /r/Greentext

File: 0761 - 1HK6KUP.jpg (7 KB, 228x221) Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)21:55:03 No.857743286 >be me >have funny idea for greentext story >im not at home >"ok anon u gotta remember this one" >get home >open 4chan >f--- >> Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)21:56:19 No.857743360 Proves that it wasn't that great in the first place.
File: 0761 - 1HK6KUP.jpg (7 KB, 228x221) Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)21:55:03 No.857743286 >be me >have funny idea for greentext story >im not at home >"ok anon u gotta remember this one" >get home >open 4chan >f--- >> Anonymous 06/26/21(Sat)21:56:19 No.857743360 Proves that it wasn't that great in the first place.

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