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Anon disappoints his father | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/23/18(Fri)19:43:41 No.43426628 >be me around 5pm >Dad comes home from construction job >sees me sitting at computer still in dressing gown with naruto hat >let's out the longest sigh ever and goes to his room and shut's door 64 KB JPG >mfw 11 Replies / 1 lImage View Thread
: Anonymous 02/23/18(Fri)19:43:41 No.43426628 >be me around 5pm >Dad comes home from construction job >sees me sitting at computer still in dressing gown with naruto hat >let's out the longest sigh ever and goes to his room and shut's door 64 KB JPG >mfw 11 Replies / 1 lImage View Thread

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Anon tries to post | /r/Greentext


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Anon may or may not have | /r/Greentext


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Anon is sed and broke. | /r/Greentext


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Anon is a pro | /r/Greentext


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Anon's Spiderbro: Part II | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: IN9PRGWE) 02/26/12(Sun)01:02:27 No.383507640 and another tiem >bring home random semi attractive girl from the bar >both of us s-------- >about to f--- >she screams and grabs her left boob >see spiderbro scurry away >she gets mad and leaves >spiderbro u f------ cockblocker > find out a week later that she had the AIDS >spiderbro now has the AIDS >spiderbro gave his life for me >what a bro and he gets skinnier ever day
Anonymous (ID: IN9PRGWE) 02/26/12(Sun)01:02:27 No.383507640 and another tiem >bring home random semi attractive girl from the bar >both of us s-------- >about to f--- >she screams and grabs her left boob >see spiderbro scurry away >she gets mad and leaves >spiderbro u f------ cockblocker > find out a week later that she had the AIDS >spiderbro now has the AIDS >spiderbro gave his life for me >what a bro and he gets skinnier ever day

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Old but gold | /r/Greentext

File: 1376421194696.jpg-(1.56 MB, 2448x3264, image.jpg) O Anonymous (ID: zri23dQ1) 08/13/13(Tue)15:13:14 No.499550295 Replies: >>499550661 >>499551303 >499551374 >>499551564 >>499551673 >>499551825 >Be 25 year old American >go to Germany, first time in Europe >plane lands, I applaud. >In german airport, take off shoes, pants, leave 3 oz sample of blood, semen in quart sized ziploc >"sir, you don't need to do that. Just walk through the metal detector" >"sorry, nicht spriche deutsch" >"sir, i am speaking english. >Go directly through metal detector, do not get irradiated, do not get groped by TSA.monopoly >Tip the security guard 5 Euro because that is the smallest paper money Spend the first day in Frankfurt. Frankfurt is a great city because there is nothing to do so literally anywhere else you go is great. >Walk to train station >lots of foreigners around, can't hear any english >walk with hand in back pocket to protect wallet >keep other hand in side pocket to protect phone. >Unable to operate ticket machine. Language options are Union Jack, Deutsch Flag, and France. >Get on train without ticket. >Gestapo officers in uniform comes up to me >"Morgen, karte bitte" >"I'm not Morgan." >"Apologies, Good Morning, ticket, please." >"Nicht spriche deutch" >"Sir, I speak english.' >Can't understand his crazy nazimouth, tip him $30 Euro to leave me alone. >He tips me back for being a cool American. >Train arrives in Munich. Begin applauding. >Nobody claps, don't want to ruin my solid American applause. >tip every passenger for letting me solo. >Get rental car. >Too many pedals. >Walk to MacDonalds to get order Double Quarter Pounder. >F------ idiot gives me wrong meal, end up with Hamburger Royale Kasse >Only tip him 30% >use burger to weigh down extra pedal >car rolls backwards into river. >applaud the whole way in.
File: 1376421194696.jpg-(1.56 MB, 2448x3264, image.jpg) O Anonymous (ID: zri23dQ1) 08/13/13(Tue)15:13:14 No.499550295 Replies: >>499550661 >>499551303 >499551374 >>499551564 >>499551673 >>499551825 >Be 25 year old American >go to Germany, first time in Europe >plane lands, I applaud. >In german airport, take off shoes, pants, leave 3 oz sample of blood, semen in quart sized ziploc >"sir, you don't need to do that. Just walk through the metal detector" >"sorry, nicht spriche deutsch" >"sir, i am speaking english. >Go directly through metal detector, do not get irradiated, do not get groped by TSA.monopoly >Tip the security guard 5 Euro because that is the smallest paper money Spend the first day in Frankfurt. Frankfurt is a great city because there is nothing to do so literally anywhere else you go is great. >Walk to train station >lots of foreigners around, can't hear any english >walk with hand in back pocket to protect wallet >keep other hand in side pocket to protect phone. >Unable to operate ticket machine. Language options are Union Jack, Deutsch Flag, and France. >Get on train without ticket. >Gestapo officers in uniform comes up to me >"Morgen, karte bitte" >"I'm not Morgan." >"Apologies, Good Morning, ticket, please." >"Nicht spriche deutch" >"Sir, I speak english.' >Can't understand his crazy nazimouth, tip him $30 Euro to leave me alone. >He tips me back for being a cool American. >Train arrives in Munich. Begin applauding. >Nobody claps, don't want to ruin my solid American applause. >tip every passenger for letting me solo. >Get rental car. >Too many pedals. >Walk to MacDonalds to get order Double Quarter Pounder. >F------ idiot gives me wrong meal, end up with Hamburger Royale Kasse >Only tip him 30% >use burger to weigh down extra pedal >car rolls backwards into river. >applaud the whole way in.

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Anon is poor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/10/19(Sun)21:11:45 No.51389710 >be me an hour ago >Working minimum wage >GF wants pizza >Have a $5 and some quarters >Go to local pizza shop >Order 8 KB JPG >Only $10 >Fuckyeah.jpg >Go to pay >Start pulling out quarters >Last few are stuck wrapped up in my pocket >Struggling >Sweating.jpg >Owner walks over >"Just give him the pizza he needs it" >Tell him I can give him the money >"No no bless your soul you can keep it" >Leave with pizza >Mfw he thought I was homeless What do, do I never go back or just tip him next time I go in
: Anonymous 03/10/19(Sun)21:11:45 No.51389710 >be me an hour ago >Working minimum wage >GF wants pizza >Have a $5 and some quarters >Go to local pizza shop >Order 8 KB JPG >Only $10 >Fuckyeah.jpg >Go to pay >Start pulling out quarters >Last few are stuck wrapped up in my pocket >Struggling >Sweating.jpg >Owner walks over >"Just give him the pizza he needs it" >Tell him I can give him the money >"No no bless your soul you can keep it" >Leave with pizza >Mfw he thought I was homeless What do, do I never go back or just tip him next time I go in

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found in this is | /r/Greentext

>kanye west replaces zayn in one direction >kanye kicks everyone out of the band >"there's only one direction 51 KB JPG fam" >tfw it's west
>kanye west replaces zayn in one direction >kanye kicks everyone out of the band >"there's only one direction 51 KB JPG fam" >tfw it's west

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Anon becomes the milkman, his milk is delicious | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/11/21(Sat)20:56:28 No.868444254 Lingerie Set for Women Teddy Japanese One Piece Babydoll Nightwear Screenshot_20211211-204924_Amazon Shopping~2.jpg 153 KB JPG >get gf cow lingerie on amazon >f--- her in it many times >driving past field of cows on my way home from work >get r----------- Did a God really create us?
: Anonymous 12/11/21(Sat)20:56:28 No.868444254 Lingerie Set for Women Teddy Japanese One Piece Babydoll Nightwear Screenshot_20211211-204924_Amazon Shopping~2.jpg 153 KB JPG >get gf cow lingerie on amazon >f--- her in it many times >driving past field of cows on my way home from work >get r----------- Did a God really create us?

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Anon is worthless | /r/Greentext

>no friends or hobbies or interests >scroll reddit all day like a loser >learn about greentext >open up 4chan >it's disgusting and vile and everyone on this website has to be the most degenerate scum to exist 105 KB JPG >ignore all the degeneracy and go to /b/ to write my own greentext >get responses >post screenshots on reddit >get lots of responses >for the first time in my life, feel appreciated and loved >feelsgoodman >start writing greentexts every day >addicted >one day, can't think of anything to wrote >exhausted all the creativity and content I had >life is empty again >void.exe
>no friends or hobbies or interests >scroll reddit all day like a loser >learn about greentext >open up 4chan >it's disgusting and vile and everyone on this website has to be the most degenerate scum to exist 105 KB JPG >ignore all the degeneracy and go to /b/ to write my own greentext >get responses >post screenshots on reddit >get lots of responses >for the first time in my life, feel appreciated and loved >feelsgoodman >start writing greentexts every day >addicted >one day, can't think of anything to wrote >exhausted all the creativity and content I had >life is empty again >void.exe

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Anon is a trans athlete | /r/Greentext

PENNSYLVANIA Published December 08, 2021 Pennsylvania transgender college swimmer dominates competition, sets numerous records The University of Pennsylvania athlete beat the runner- up by 38 seconds in one competition By Emma Colton | Fox News VFOX TRANS SWIMMER SMASHES WOMEN'S RECORDS AT UPENN NEWS FOX &friends MIKE ROWE COMING UP FOX&friends channel C6F43A75-DE4A-4FF4-A9D6-FDE64F027F72.jpg 205 KB JPG >be a man with failing swimming career >decide to call yourself a woman >now you're dominating women's swimming Genius : Anonymous (ID: GYduf10n 12/09/21(Thu)01:32:21 No.351315180 >>351315103 (OP)_# Women deserve this >>351315651 #
PENNSYLVANIA Published December 08, 2021 Pennsylvania transgender college swimmer dominates competition, sets numerous records The University of Pennsylvania athlete beat the runner- up by 38 seconds in one competition By Emma Colton | Fox News VFOX TRANS SWIMMER SMASHES WOMEN'S RECORDS AT UPENN NEWS FOX &friends MIKE ROWE COMING UP FOX&friends channel C6F43A75-DE4A-4FF4-A9D6-FDE64F027F72.jpg 205 KB JPG >be a man with failing swimming career >decide to call yourself a woman >now you're dominating women's swimming Genius : Anonymous (ID: GYduf10n 12/09/21(Thu)01:32:21 No.351315180 >>351315103 (OP)_# Women deserve this >>351315651 #

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Anon likes horror movies | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/11/21(Sat)01:26:05 No.66514600 9F800A35-C3EE-4A2F-9417-55B64010929C.jpg 27 KB JPG >you will never have a cute curly haired horror movie protagonist gf ITS NOT F------ FAIR MAN
: Anonymous 12/11/21(Sat)01:26:05 No.66514600 9F800A35-C3EE-4A2F-9417-55B64010929C.jpg 27 KB JPG >you will never have a cute curly haired horror movie protagonist gf ITS NOT F------ FAIR MAN

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It’s simple, we kill the Batman | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/12/21(Fri)20:28:00 No.849400058 > be me > family starving > decide to commit crime > batman shows up > breaks my leg, both arms and spine > says he doesn't kill and leaves me with the pain 14 KB JPG > hospital bill I can't pay > mfw I have to commit crime to pay hospital bill now
: Anonymous 03/12/21(Fri)20:28:00 No.849400058 > be me > family starving > decide to commit crime > batman shows up > breaks my leg, both arms and spine > says he doesn't kill and leaves me with the pain 14 KB JPG > hospital bill I can't pay > mfw I have to commit crime to pay hospital bill now

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Anon is excited for ice cream | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Sun 08 Aug 2021 00:27:14 No.62937845 Quoted By: >>62937931 >>62937979 >>62942192 >>62946469 Report >>62937132 >be me, in highschool >come home from school >sister is on the couch eating ice cream >tell her "I didn't know we had ice cream" >she is unusually quiet, no response >go to kitchen freezer, no ice cream >check garbage, no ice cream container >check sink >find ice cream scoop covered in margarine
Anonymous Sun 08 Aug 2021 00:27:14 No.62937845 Quoted By: >>62937931 >>62937979 >>62942192 >>62946469 Report >>62937132 >be me, in highschool >come home from school >sister is on the couch eating ice cream >tell her "I didn't know we had ice cream" >she is unusually quiet, no response >go to kitchen freezer, no ice cream >check garbage, no ice cream container >check sink >find ice cream scoop covered in margarine

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Anon is gay | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/11/21(Sat)23:53:43 No.868438466 >be me >be 15 >boyfriend c--- in my ass daily >be you >never experienced love >masturbates to degenerate p--- 33 KB JPG Why live?
: Anonymous 12/11/21(Sat)23:53:43 No.868438466 >be me >be 15 >boyfriend c--- in my ass daily >be you >never experienced love >masturbates to degenerate p--- 33 KB JPG Why live?

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Anon gets touched | /r/Greentext

>go shopping at retail store >see female employee folding a pair of pants >they're my size >ask if I can try them on >she shrugs >go into fitting room and put on pants >pants touched by female hands touching boxers touching my d--- >molested by my uncle at age 7 see you later, virgins
>go shopping at retail store >see female employee folding a pair of pants >they're my size >ask if I can try them on >she shrugs >go into fitting room and put on pants >pants touched by female hands touching boxers touching my d--- >molested by my uncle at age 7 see you later, virgins

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Anon is bearmaxxing | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Bearmaxxing 12/11/21(Sat)18:21:58 No.4004676 GRIZZLY.jpg 131 KB JPG >Eats a s--- ton in the fall >Sleeps all winter >One of the strongest and most dangerous animals on the planet Why haven't you taken the bearpill anon?
: Anonymous Bearmaxxing 12/11/21(Sat)18:21:58 No.4004676 GRIZZLY.jpg 131 KB JPG >Eats a s--- ton in the fall >Sleeps all winter >One of the strongest and most dangerous animals on the planet Why haven't you taken the bearpill anon?

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Anon pisses off tard | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/22/18(Sun)23:20:04 No.46994524 Tard stories? I'll start >Be in 10th grade in upstairs class >There's this one tard who gets super f------ p----- and likes to tackle people >Incidentally likes anime >While the teacher is gone were all goofing off, just having a good time 15 KB JPG >Tard is watching K-On like a f-- >My friend thinks it's funny to go and mock him >Starts making fun of him and unplugs his headphones from the monitor >F----- music starts blasting >Everyone laughs >Suddenly, he screeches like the siren from a JU 87 stuka >Punches friend straight in the face and causes at least 9999 damage(he didn't have a limit-break) >Instant K-O, not even a phoenix down can save him >I try hard not to laugh my ass off, the entire class is in shock >Tard thinks I'm laughing at him so he begins to charge at me >F------ throws himself at me like an ugly bastard does to a innocent little Loli >Throw myself out of the way >Tard flung himself hard enough to break the window behind me >Falls two stories >Dies >Mfw I'm pretty sure everyone was traumatized after this
: Anonymous 07/22/18(Sun)23:20:04 No.46994524 Tard stories? I'll start >Be in 10th grade in upstairs class >There's this one tard who gets super f------ p----- and likes to tackle people >Incidentally likes anime >While the teacher is gone were all goofing off, just having a good time 15 KB JPG >Tard is watching K-On like a f-- >My friend thinks it's funny to go and mock him >Starts making fun of him and unplugs his headphones from the monitor >F----- music starts blasting >Everyone laughs >Suddenly, he screeches like the siren from a JU 87 stuka >Punches friend straight in the face and causes at least 9999 damage(he didn't have a limit-break) >Instant K-O, not even a phoenix down can save him >I try hard not to laugh my ass off, the entire class is in shock >Tard thinks I'm laughing at him so he begins to charge at me >F------ throws himself at me like an ugly bastard does to a innocent little Loli >Throw myself out of the way >Tard flung himself hard enough to break the window behind me >Falls two stories >Dies >Mfw I'm pretty sure everyone was traumatized after this

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Anon gets philosophical | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/12/21(Sun)09:01:12 No.66524431 MFS BE LIKE GO TALK TO HER >wake up early >tired >day ruined I CANT BRO SHE MAKES ME NERVOUS >sleep in >wasted entire day 458 KB JPG >day ruined theres no winning is there? View Thread
: Anonymous 12/12/21(Sun)09:01:12 No.66524431 MFS BE LIKE GO TALK TO HER >wake up early >tired >day ruined I CANT BRO SHE MAKES ME NERVOUS >sleep in >wasted entire day 458 KB JPG >day ruined theres no winning is there? View Thread

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