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Silence of 163 gigs of videos of lambs being shaved | /r/Greentext

Tech support horror thread? Tech support horror thread. Share your stories. >be me >work at mid-sized software company >IT support >some new guy gets a job as a programmer >claims he has worked at very big projects before >can't name them >fast forward 2 weeks >calls me and claims his computer is crashing every few minutes >walk up to his desk and watch him work until it crashes again >have leenux on a stick with me at all times >boot it up >ask him if he's been visiting any kind of not-so-legit websites >"No man, I'm clean" >gets sweaty and nervous once I browse trough the personal files >Downloads folder has multiple zip's with cryptic names inside them >"I dunno man, they were always there" >one of them is 163GB big >opening it takes almost 10 minutes >tons of folders with russian names >all of them are filled with videos of sheeps being shaved for whatever reason
Tech support horror thread? Tech support horror thread. Share your stories. >be me >work at mid-sized software company >IT support >some new guy gets a job as a programmer >claims he has worked at very big projects before >can't name them >fast forward 2 weeks >calls me and claims his computer is crashing every few minutes >walk up to his desk and watch him work until it crashes again >have leenux on a stick with me at all times >boot it up >ask him if he's been visiting any kind of not-so-legit websites >"No man, I'm clean" >gets sweaty and nervous once I browse trough the personal files >Downloads folder has multiple zip's with cryptic names inside them >"I dunno man, they were always there" >one of them is 163GB big >opening it takes almost 10 minutes >tons of folders with russian names >all of them are filled with videos of sheeps being shaved for whatever reason

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Anon is hongry | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/11/17(Tue)22:54:25 No.9158484 >>9158501 I've been living off 800 calories a day for the last 2 weeks. AMA, or dont, whatever f--- you. O Anonymous 07/11/17(Tue)22:57:18 No.9158501 File: 1477591801645.jpg (3 KB, 126x111) >>9158513 >>9158484 cranky because youre hongry arent you
Anonymous 07/11/17(Tue)22:54:25 No.9158484 >>9158501 I've been living off 800 calories a day for the last 2 weeks. AMA, or dont, whatever f--- you. O Anonymous 07/11/17(Tue)22:57:18 No.9158501 File: 1477591801645.jpg (3 KB, 126x111) >>9158513 >>9158484 cranky because youre hongry arent you

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Just a little wierd.. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/12/21(Sun)14:39:06 No.25466214 My boyfriend will only have sex with me if I pretend l'm dead. The only way he can maintain an erection and actually f--- is if I lay there stiff like a corpse. He said he likes to imagine that he is r----- a dead corpse. How weird is this? 58 KB JPG 4 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 12/12/21(Sun)14:44:26 No.25466243 a little 14 KB JPG
: Anonymous 12/12/21(Sun)14:39:06 No.25466214 My boyfriend will only have sex with me if I pretend l'm dead. The only way he can maintain an erection and actually f--- is if I lay there stiff like a corpse. He said he likes to imagine that he is r----- a dead corpse. How weird is this? 58 KB JPG 4 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 12/12/21(Sun)14:44:26 No.25466243 a little 14 KB JPG

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Anon has a epiphany | /r/Greentext

>Be Me at 12 >hopping like frog down hallway >hit the wall Mfw i realise ive always been retarded 96 КВ PNG
>Be Me at 12 >hopping like frog down hallway >hit the wall Mfw i realise ive always been retarded 96 КВ PNG

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Anon plays Rainbow Six Siege | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/07/19(Tue)19:08:14 No.41407881 >*door open or breach sounds* >*Clang clang clang* >*BWWAAAAAAG!* >*See color white everywhere* >*EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE* 22 KB JPG : Anonymous 05/07/19(Tue)19:09:08 No.41407899 Great thread, truly the best we've had today.
: Anonymous 05/07/19(Tue)19:08:14 No.41407881 >*door open or breach sounds* >*Clang clang clang* >*BWWAAAAAAG!* >*See color white everywhere* >*EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE* 22 KB JPG : Anonymous 05/07/19(Tue)19:09:08 No.41407899 Great thread, truly the best we've had today.

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Anon takes the NPC pill | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/05/21(Mon)11:44:34 No.64448617 Have taken the NPCpill yet, you /r9k/ >Be me, social retard >Work is always difficult because I literally can't make friends >Never have any idea what to talk about 89 KB JPG >Like the idea of camping >Decide I'm going to be the Camp Bro NPC >No matter what, no matter how minor the question or subject is at work, always tie in camping or at minimum a camping pun >Any time I'm away from my desk I put a "Gone Fishing" sign up >Start to wear plaid and camo, drink my coffee out of a thermos >People are annoyed at first, but ignore it >Eventually people start to talk to me about camping, asking for places, ideas, how to do stuff >Start to make friends, coworkers want to do a BBQ by the river and invite me and have me help plan it >it goes great and I b------- my way through everything >"Whoa, you're a pretty cool guy, anon!" >mfw I've never been camping and just browse /out/ too much 6 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 07/05/21(Mon)11:44:34 No.64448617 Have taken the NPCpill yet, you /r9k/ >Be me, social retard >Work is always difficult because I literally can't make friends >Never have any idea what to talk about 89 KB JPG >Like the idea of camping >Decide I'm going to be the Camp Bro NPC >No matter what, no matter how minor the question or subject is at work, always tie in camping or at minimum a camping pun >Any time I'm away from my desk I put a "Gone Fishing" sign up >Start to wear plaid and camo, drink my coffee out of a thermos >People are annoyed at first, but ignore it >Eventually people start to talk to me about camping, asking for places, ideas, how to do stuff >Start to make friends, coworkers want to do a BBQ by the river and invite me and have me help plan it >it goes great and I b------- my way through everything >"Whoa, you're a pretty cool guy, anon!" >mfw I've never been camping and just browse /out/ too much 6 Replies View Thread

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Is anon a redditor | /r/Greentext

>hate trannies >post non stop t----- p--- >hate "degenerates" >make the most vile posts imaginable >hate fake media >post nonsensical conspiracy theories all the time like they're facts 7 KB JPG >be 4chan frog : Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)09:54:44 No.868595011 : Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)09:55:13 No.868595027 >>868594904 (OP) # kill youself redditor f--
>hate trannies >post non stop t----- p--- >hate "degenerates" >make the most vile posts imaginable >hate fake media >post nonsensical conspiracy theories all the time like they're facts 7 KB JPG >be 4chan frog : Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)09:54:44 No.868595011 : Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)09:55:13 No.868595027 >>868594904 (OP) # kill youself redditor f--

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Anon feels superiour | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/07/18(Fri)11:52:30 No.786777683 ITT times you were accidentally racist > be me highschool towards the end of the year > free day in class, everyone's on their phones > notice everyone has iPhones 870 KB GIF > buddy next to me has the only other Android in the room > buddy notices too > "Android master race, Yeah!" *fist bump* > looks around again > angrystares.png > buddy and I are only white people in the room > they didn't hear us say "Android" > mfw
: Anonymous 12/07/18(Fri)11:52:30 No.786777683 ITT times you were accidentally racist > be me highschool towards the end of the year > free day in class, everyone's on their phones > notice everyone has iPhones 870 KB GIF > buddy next to me has the only other Android in the room > buddy notices too > "Android master race, Yeah!" *fist bump* > looks around again > angrystares.png > buddy and I are only white people in the room > they didn't hear us say "Android" > mfw

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Perfectly balanced | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)12:40:50 No.868599778 >I WILL shriek like a retarded baboon at the first notion of danger >I WILL drive poorly and cause the majority of traffic accidents >I WILL make my offspring everybody else's problem >I WILL cause workplace drama at 205 KB PNG every place of employment I ever get Do fembots really? : Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)12:55:31 No.868600471 >I WILL shoot up my job or school >I WILL refuse to talk to women then get mad at women for being in relationships >I WILL knock a girl up and then 11 KB PNG leave >I WILL commit more violent crime than females >I WILL be more prone to anger and beat my fists when I'm made like an ape >I WILL refuse to get a job and just play video games all day Do men really?
: Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)12:40:50 No.868599778 >I WILL shriek like a retarded baboon at the first notion of danger >I WILL drive poorly and cause the majority of traffic accidents >I WILL make my offspring everybody else's problem >I WILL cause workplace drama at 205 KB PNG every place of employment I ever get Do fembots really? : Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)12:55:31 No.868600471 >I WILL shoot up my job or school >I WILL refuse to talk to women then get mad at women for being in relationships >I WILL knock a girl up and then 11 KB PNG leave >I WILL commit more violent crime than females >I WILL be more prone to anger and beat my fists when I'm made like an ape >I WILL refuse to get a job and just play video games all day Do men really?

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Anon doesn't like barney | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/13/21(Mon)21:32:07 No.868573624 >l hate you >You hate me >Let's get together and kill Barney >With a knife in his ass and a bullet in his head >Now l'm glad that Barney's 130 KB JPG dead View Thread
: Anonymous 12/13/21(Mon)21:32:07 No.868573624 >l hate you >You hate me >Let's get together and kill Barney >With a knife in his ass and a bullet in his head >Now l'm glad that Barney's 130 KB JPG dead View Thread

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I hope your cat has a long happy life with you anon. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)06:24:41 No.581452764 >>581449410_(OP)_# >real girls like me >l don't like real girls (or boys) >only girl I can tolerate is a socially awkward Jesus freak >just want to go home and play 845 KB JPG with my cat >cat is 10 years old which means he's middle aged already I wish he would live forever >>581453991 # >>581454248 # >>581463186 #
: Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)06:24:41 No.581452764 >>581449410_(OP)_# >real girls like me >l don't like real girls (or boys) >only girl I can tolerate is a socially awkward Jesus freak >just want to go home and play 845 KB JPG with my cat >cat is 10 years old which means he's middle aged already I wish he would live forever >>581453991 # >>581454248 # >>581463186 #

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Anon and the Sexy Intersection | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)04:37:44 No.66555069 >>66555002 (OP) # Weirdest wet dream I've ever had. >In my car >Pull up to T intersection >Waiting at stop sign, waiting for a break in traffic since the road l'm going onto has no stop signs >Looking left >Looking right >Bit of a hill to my left can't quite see over it >Trying to lean forward position my body better to see over the hill a little more >Wake up >J----- myself Everyone l've ever told this story to has no idea what this means. I'm not attracted to waiting a stop sign though.
: Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)04:37:44 No.66555069 >>66555002 (OP) # Weirdest wet dream I've ever had. >In my car >Pull up to T intersection >Waiting at stop sign, waiting for a break in traffic since the road l'm going onto has no stop signs >Looking left >Looking right >Bit of a hill to my left can't quite see over it >Trying to lean forward position my body better to see over the hill a little more >Wake up >J----- myself Everyone l've ever told this story to has no idea what this means. I'm not attracted to waiting a stop sign though.

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Anon has conspiracy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: DwXx+tM7 ) so if trans cant serve in the military and gays can serve in the military trans are not gays 4 KB PNG and if traps are trans then that means traps are not gay | Anonymous (ID: INIEFBAR >>135013061 (OP) # >mfw this entire move was orchestrated to allow Trump to f--- traps without feeling gay 156 KB PNG
: Anonymous (ID: DwXx+tM7 ) so if trans cant serve in the military and gays can serve in the military trans are not gays 4 KB PNG and if traps are trans then that means traps are not gay | Anonymous (ID: INIEFBAR >>135013061 (OP) # >mfw this entire move was orchestrated to allow Trump to f--- traps without feeling gay 156 KB PNG

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Anon sets the rules | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)18:58:16 No.858512914 >roommate asks me to drive him to his dealer >sure, I have nothing going on >get in, start the car, put on seatbelt >notice roommate doesn't have his 8 KB JPG seatbelt on >ask him to put it on >"Why? Aren't you a good driver?" >tell him it's my car and I want him to have his seatbelt on >"lol f--- you man just drive" >okay >get on the road, accelerate to 40mph >slam on the brakes >roommate flies out of his seat, his face hits the windshield >oh s---, sorry bro. Maybe you should put your f------ seatbelt on >he does >I turn the car around and drive us back home F------ f----- can walk to his dealer's now. Wear your seatbelts.
: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)18:58:16 No.858512914 >roommate asks me to drive him to his dealer >sure, I have nothing going on >get in, start the car, put on seatbelt >notice roommate doesn't have his 8 KB JPG seatbelt on >ask him to put it on >"Why? Aren't you a good driver?" >tell him it's my car and I want him to have his seatbelt on >"lol f--- you man just drive" >okay >get on the road, accelerate to 40mph >slam on the brakes >roommate flies out of his seat, his face hits the windshield >oh s---, sorry bro. Maybe you should put your f------ seatbelt on >he does >I turn the car around and drive us back home F------ f----- can walk to his dealer's now. Wear your seatbelts.

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/int/ wonders... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)15:46:37 No.156515604 >decide to go on vacation somewhere cheap >go to spain >sitting with my friends, drinking >we're all in our mid to late 20's >12-14yo spanish girls come to chat us up why is this? 912 KB PNG
: Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)15:46:37 No.156515604 >decide to go on vacation somewhere cheap >go to spain >sitting with my friends, drinking >we're all in our mid to late 20's >12-14yo spanish girls come to chat us up why is this? 912 KB PNG

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Water cooler | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/05/21(Fri)22:48:03 No.62618124 >coworkers discovered the small pebble of s--- that I placed in the water cooler >boss gathers everyone together and says that they'll be firing the person involved and potentially 271 KB JPG taking legal action >realize that there was a security camera pointing directly at the water cooler >it's only a matter of time before l'm found out : Anonymous 03/05/21(Fri)22:49:38 No.62618208 >>62618124 (OP)# >small pebble of s--- that I placed in the water cooler why?
: Anonymous 03/05/21(Fri)22:48:03 No.62618124 >coworkers discovered the small pebble of s--- that I placed in the water cooler >boss gathers everyone together and says that they'll be firing the person involved and potentially 271 KB JPG taking legal action >realize that there was a security camera pointing directly at the water cooler >it's only a matter of time before l'm found out : Anonymous 03/05/21(Fri)22:49:38 No.62618208 >>62618124 (OP)# >small pebble of s--- that I placed in the water cooler why?

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Anon hosts a dinner party | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)05:51:09 No.868549387 20211213164435.jpg| 56 KB JPG I just figured out a way we can identify who's based and who's cringe. Here's the simple step by step procedure. >Host dinner party at your home with Monsters Inc playing on the TV >whoever doesn't start aggressively beating their d--- when boo comes on screen is labeled cringe.
: Anonymous 12/14/21(Tue)05:51:09 No.868549387 20211213164435.jpg| 56 KB JPG I just figured out a way we can identify who's based and who's cringe. Here's the simple step by step procedure. >Host dinner party at your home with Monsters Inc playing on the TV >whoever doesn't start aggressively beating their d--- when boo comes on screen is labeled cringe.

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Anon is on a nostalgia ride | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/19/20(Sat)20:20:32 No.61455782 IT DIDN'T HAVE TO END LIKE THIS >Fallout: New Vegas launched on Steam >contemporary funk music playing >hot cocoa >snow outside 103 KB JPG >the sounds of mom screaming at her Zoom class and then her boyfriend screaming at her from upstairs We were almost comfy, weren't we boys?
: Anonymous 12/19/20(Sat)20:20:32 No.61455782 IT DIDN'T HAVE TO END LIKE THIS >Fallout: New Vegas launched on Steam >contemporary funk music playing >hot cocoa >snow outside 103 KB JPG >the sounds of mom screaming at her Zoom class and then her boyfriend screaming at her from upstairs We were almost comfy, weren't we boys?

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Anon meets someone | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/14/19(Sun)09:00:46 No.51932917 >talking to qt boy on discord >he lives an hour drive away >agree to meet up next weekend I haven't told him I'm trans yet but I'm sure he'll understand. I'm Daddy going to go on a few dates with him before I tell him 328 KB GIF : Anonymous 04/14/19(Sun)09:02:01 No.51932931 >>51932917 (OP) # >discord don't worry, he'll be fine with it.
: Anonymous 04/14/19(Sun)09:00:46 No.51932917 >talking to qt boy on discord >he lives an hour drive away >agree to meet up next weekend I haven't told him I'm trans yet but I'm sure he'll understand. I'm Daddy going to go on a few dates with him before I tell him 328 KB GIF : Anonymous 04/14/19(Sun)09:02:01 No.51932931 >>51932917 (OP) # >discord don't worry, he'll be fine with it.

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Anon has a revelation. | /r/Greentext

File: static-assets-upload67777(.).jpg (14 KB, 312x245) O Anonymous 12/13/21(Mon)20:22:27 No.868537962 [Reply] >humans start out in Africa >humanity expands across the world >whites dominate economically, technologically, and militaristically >Africans live in mud huts and execute you for not being black enough Explain
File: static-assets-upload67777(.).jpg (14 KB, 312x245) O Anonymous 12/13/21(Mon)20:22:27 No.868537962 [Reply] >humans start out in Africa >humanity expands across the world >whites dominate economically, technologically, and militaristically >Africans live in mud huts and execute you for not being black enough Explain

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