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Smoking is bad | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)09:47:55 No.66596355 >behind a cutie at the gas station >She buys packs and packs of cigarettes 136 KB GIF
: Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)09:47:55 No.66596355 >behind a cutie at the gas station >She buys packs and packs of cigarettes 136 KB GIF

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Anon despises Elden Ring fans | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Reddit moment 12/11/21(Sat)00:54:39 No.581087832 I wanna see this game flop harder than Cyberpunk. No particular reason for it, I just think the fans are annoying ELDEN RING 935 KB JPG
: Anonymous Reddit moment 12/11/21(Sat)00:54:39 No.581087832 I wanna see this game flop harder than Cyberpunk. No particular reason for it, I just think the fans are annoying ELDEN RING 935 KB JPG

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Anon gets his life together | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/03/18(Fri)07:00:28 No.776125534 >be me, 20 >weird p--- addicition/fap everyday since 15 >try nofap >fail fail fail fail >keep trying >start doing better >start genuinely wanting a life and a wide >getting good streaks(over 6 months) >have times when its impossible to not fap >today on a 5 day streak no desire to even look at 17 KB GIF p--- >think about traps and actually disgusted >exercising, getting good career together Guys i feel like im going to make it in this world for the first time in my whole life. I feel like there is something calling me and nothing can stop me from getting there
: Anonymous 08/03/18(Fri)07:00:28 No.776125534 >be me, 20 >weird p--- addicition/fap everyday since 15 >try nofap >fail fail fail fail >keep trying >start doing better >start genuinely wanting a life and a wide >getting good streaks(over 6 months) >have times when its impossible to not fap >today on a 5 day streak no desire to even look at 17 KB GIF p--- >think about traps and actually disgusted >exercising, getting good career together Guys i feel like im going to make it in this world for the first time in my whole life. I feel like there is something calling me and nothing can stop me from getting there

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Anon is the ultimate misogynist | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/30/21(Fri)22:35:33 No.21703989 [Reply] ► Please be patient I have autism >be gay >go out in public with bf >we both hit on and dogwhistle at women >we're not bi >we just hate women
Anonymous 07/30/21(Fri)22:35:33 No.21703989 [Reply] ► Please be patient I have autism >be gay >go out in public with bf >we both hit on and dogwhistle at women >we're not bi >we just hate women

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Old but old | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/25/17(Tue)11:59:06 No.740046744 >be me >smokin some of that giggle bush >super high, dont realize that the smoke has drifted under the door of the apt >neighbors call police >wth 74 KB JPG >police knock, I open door Hello sir. We received a call about you smoking cannabis. I can smell it already, so just come with me Anon. >mind races No officer, this is a magic bag of weed. >he steps in, asks Now how tf is that? >start explaining Officer, when I try to get rid of it, it just reappears in my pocket. I'll prove it! >he gets the face, pic related >bring him to bathroom Watch >throw bag in toilet, flush, then do nothing >he looks around confused Where are the drugs Anon? >mfw it worked What drugs?
: Anonymous 07/25/17(Tue)11:59:06 No.740046744 >be me >smokin some of that giggle bush >super high, dont realize that the smoke has drifted under the door of the apt >neighbors call police >wth 74 KB JPG >police knock, I open door Hello sir. We received a call about you smoking cannabis. I can smell it already, so just come with me Anon. >mind races No officer, this is a magic bag of weed. >he steps in, asks Now how tf is that? >start explaining Officer, when I try to get rid of it, it just reappears in my pocket. I'll prove it! >he gets the face, pic related >bring him to bathroom Watch >throw bag in toilet, flush, then do nothing >he looks around confused Where are the drugs Anon? >mfw it worked What drugs?

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Anon is the lowest form of life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/21/18(Wed)08:17:25 No.43367828 DEVILISH >dogs nails aren't clipped >wake up nightly from it tapping on the wooden floor >finally snap >grip him by the collar >slam him into the back of my car >he's visibly shaking 10 KB PNG >drive out to the middle of nowhere >kick him out >he scampers back >slam door in his face >drive off with a smile >look back >he gives chase >slows down and stops from being so old >watches me drive off >his silhouette disappears in the dark Feels f------ good 33 Replies / 9 Images View Thread : Anonymous 02/21/18(Wed)09:13:19 No.43368465 f--- off r9k might be s----- but this is horrible
: Anonymous 02/21/18(Wed)08:17:25 No.43367828 DEVILISH >dogs nails aren't clipped >wake up nightly from it tapping on the wooden floor >finally snap >grip him by the collar >slam him into the back of my car >he's visibly shaking 10 KB PNG >drive out to the middle of nowhere >kick him out >he scampers back >slam door in his face >drive off with a smile >look back >he gives chase >slows down and stops from being so old >watches me drive off >his silhouette disappears in the dark Feels f------ good 33 Replies / 9 Images View Thread : Anonymous 02/21/18(Wed)09:13:19 No.43368465 f--- off r9k might be s----- but this is horrible

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Girl swallows anons cum.. | /r/Greentext

>be me >jacking off to hentai >c-- in empty bowl of food that I ate >clean bowl 123 KB JPG >soap kills 99.99% of germs >girl comes over and eats out of the clean bowl >0.01% of my c-- goes in her mouth >basically got a b------ See ya later, virgins
>be me >jacking off to hentai >c-- in empty bowl of food that I ate >clean bowl 123 KB JPG >soap kills 99.99% of germs >girl comes over and eats out of the clean bowl >0.01% of my c-- goes in her mouth >basically got a b------ See ya later, virgins

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Anon wants to play a shooter | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/16/21(Thu)07:02:46 No.66584958 >want to play co op shooter >join lobby and explain that im hard of hearing and ask people to be patient because im polite like that 54 KB JPG >insulted and asked to leave >if I dont tell people i just get vote kicked anyway F--- you
: Anonymous 12/16/21(Thu)07:02:46 No.66584958 >want to play co op shooter >join lobby and explain that im hard of hearing and ask people to be patient because im polite like that 54 KB JPG >insulted and asked to leave >if I dont tell people i just get vote kicked anyway F--- you

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Anon's typical Friday | /r/Greentext


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Anon masturbates to kids game | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)09:33:22 No.66596235 >this is a character in a kid's game 353 KB JPG 10 Replies / 4 Images View Thread : Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)09:40:54 No.66596297 >>66596235 (OP) # so what? are hot people not allowed to exist anymore because kids might get horny? get the f--- outta here
: Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)09:33:22 No.66596235 >this is a character in a kid's game 353 KB JPG 10 Replies / 4 Images View Thread : Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)09:40:54 No.66596297 >>66596235 (OP) # so what? are hot people not allowed to exist anymore because kids might get horny? get the f--- outta here

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Anon’s learning English | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/16/21(Thu)08:47:08 No.868718080 Sorry for bad anguish. >be me >be bad at speak englon >wawking >stub tow on tabel >mfw 113 KB JPG Pic relations
: Anonymous 12/16/21(Thu)08:47:08 No.868718080 Sorry for bad anguish. >be me >be bad at speak englon >wawking >stub tow on tabel >mfw 113 KB JPG Pic relations

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Anon is as straight as a bent pipe. | /r/Greentext


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Anon goes to the restroom | /r/Greentext


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It never happened | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous 03/26/18(Mon)13:38:54 No.4362112 My grandpa is a Rwandan genocide denier. I have no idea why. We live in Wales, have no connection to Rwanda and he isn't 27 KB JPG a conspiracy kind of guy in general. He has never been to Rwanda or met a Rwandan yet in his house he has pages of documents 'proving the hoax', such as a full script for the movie Hotel Rwanda with a bunch of random letters from the words highlighted showing 'the secret messages' from the director. He says that Paul Kagame doesn't exist and that 'every picture of bodies 'is clearly in Burundi' and has huge printouts of aerial photographs of Burundi to prove it. Not sure what he has against Rwanda but if you bring it up to him he calls you a 'Tutsi liar'.
| Anonymous 03/26/18(Mon)13:38:54 No.4362112 My grandpa is a Rwandan genocide denier. I have no idea why. We live in Wales, have no connection to Rwanda and he isn't 27 KB JPG a conspiracy kind of guy in general. He has never been to Rwanda or met a Rwandan yet in his house he has pages of documents 'proving the hoax', such as a full script for the movie Hotel Rwanda with a bunch of random letters from the words highlighted showing 'the secret messages' from the director. He says that Paul Kagame doesn't exist and that 'every picture of bodies 'is clearly in Burundi' and has huge printouts of aerial photographs of Burundi to prove it. Not sure what he has against Rwanda but if you bring it up to him he calls you a 'Tutsi liar'.

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Anon loves the D in a no homo way | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I love sucking d--- 12/16/21(Thu)06:04:29 No.21545752 >message a bunch of guys "hey i want to suck your dịck" >suck a guy's d--- for the first time. very weird but extremely hot in retrospect >want to suck d--- more often, but don't want to be gay 704 KB WEBM >put an ad up "looking for someone who wants b------- every day no h---" >guy responds. pretty average looking. not impressive but eh >invite him over, immediately give him head as discussed. 10 minutes into meeting this guy and i've sucked his d---, swallowed his c-- >comes over again the same day, give him another b------ >texts me the next day, agree to suck his d--- again >guy blows my phone up constantly. "bro where u at lol" >usually agree to meet even if i don't feel like it. always glad that i did. >tame my gag reflex on a dildo just to give this guy better head >he's all like "f--- yeah dude that's so good s--- dude im gonna c--" >basically become glurk glurk 4900 >probably swallow a gallon of this guy's j--- over the next few months >suddenly he moves to another city f---
: Anonymous I love sucking d--- 12/16/21(Thu)06:04:29 No.21545752 >message a bunch of guys "hey i want to suck your dịck" >suck a guy's d--- for the first time. very weird but extremely hot in retrospect >want to suck d--- more often, but don't want to be gay 704 KB WEBM >put an ad up "looking for someone who wants b------- every day no h---" >guy responds. pretty average looking. not impressive but eh >invite him over, immediately give him head as discussed. 10 minutes into meeting this guy and i've sucked his d---, swallowed his c-- >comes over again the same day, give him another b------ >texts me the next day, agree to suck his d--- again >guy blows my phone up constantly. "bro where u at lol" >usually agree to meet even if i don't feel like it. always glad that i did. >tame my gag reflex on a dildo just to give this guy better head >he's all like "f--- yeah dude that's so good s--- dude im gonna c--" >basically become glurk glurk 4900 >probably swallow a gallon of this guy's j--- over the next few months >suddenly he moves to another city f---

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They call him nickleback | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 868746078 2 min. ago >started new pastime last year >I take a bag of nickles and walk around the city looking for people with coffees that don't have lids >when I spot one I walk by and plop a few nickles in with a quick god bless >l've spent over $600 this year alone 10.5 kB JPG 1 REPLY O IMAGES REPLY
Anonymous | 868746078 2 min. ago >started new pastime last year >I take a bag of nickles and walk around the city looking for people with coffees that don't have lids >when I spot one I walk by and plop a few nickles in with a quick god bless >l've spent over $600 this year alone 10.5 kB JPG 1 REPLY O IMAGES REPLY

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Anon's alone time | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Hace 1 hora 47412892 >be me >beat my d--- >right before I start >say "Shouldn't you've bought me dinner first?" >my sister hears me say that >and audible screams "WHAT THE F---, ANON?" >mfw 1 REPLY Anonymous Hace 1 hora 47413007 >>47412892 (OP) >beat my d--- >start shouting "I YIELD! I YIELD!" while c------ >cover myself in c-- >"never should've come. here!"
Anonymous Hace 1 hora 47412892 >be me >beat my d--- >right before I start >say "Shouldn't you've bought me dinner first?" >my sister hears me say that >and audible screams "WHAT THE F---, ANON?" >mfw 1 REPLY Anonymous Hace 1 hora 47413007 >>47412892 (OP) >beat my d--- >start shouting "I YIELD! I YIELD!" while c------ >cover myself in c-- >"never should've come. here!"

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Anon is a great dad | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1 hour ago 47948202 Bye :) >Be me >have a kid at 18yrs old >at first gfs pregnancy is meh >she bitch alot >deal wit it until kid is born >kid borns, it's the most horrifying event to watch >kid is all good, be happy :) >>>fast forward Vano AM NOT CRYING, OKAY >now I'm 22, kid is about to turn 5 at this xmas >me goes to doctors cause bad prolonged headaches... >get diagnosed with brain cancer >mfw >try to tell 4yr old why dad is not going to be around anymore >he does not understand >l make sure that he will be ok >I love that little mf, he is my life, the only good thing I ever made... >l only have about 6 to 10month if lucky >Good Bye greentexts and anons :')
Anonymous 1 hour ago 47948202 Bye :) >Be me >have a kid at 18yrs old >at first gfs pregnancy is meh >she bitch alot >deal wit it until kid is born >kid borns, it's the most horrifying event to watch >kid is all good, be happy :) >>>fast forward Vano AM NOT CRYING, OKAY >now I'm 22, kid is about to turn 5 at this xmas >me goes to doctors cause bad prolonged headaches... >get diagnosed with brain cancer >mfw >try to tell 4yr old why dad is not going to be around anymore >he does not understand >l make sure that he will be ok >I love that little mf, he is my life, the only good thing I ever made... >l only have about 6 to 10month if lucky >Good Bye greentexts and anons :')

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Anon makes block houses | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)07:52:26 No.64791948 >builds small block house >truly happy 13 KB PNG 7 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)08:06:36 No.64792054 >>64791987 # >been working at a kindergarten last year >one day, not a single child showed up (covid just started) >just spent the whole day building a giant building block castle with the other employers >best day of my life
Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)07:52:26 No.64791948 >builds small block house >truly happy 13 KB PNG 7 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)08:06:36 No.64792054 >>64791987 # >been working at a kindergarten last year >one day, not a single child showed up (covid just started) >just spent the whole day building a giant building block castle with the other employers >best day of my life

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Anon is a businessman | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/16/21(Tue)11:22:47 No.849732160 >be me >get bored >order a pizza >pretend to be a pizza delivery guy >deliver pizzas to random people >hope to find a qt girl who lives alone and who likes pizza 154 KB PNG >thats all i need >eventually run into a few >p--- lied to me, whatever >around 70% of people actually decide to pay me for my pizza >others say they didnt order it >no loss >i guess people want pizzas some people just dont order them >idea.jpg >a pizza is 4 dollars at the store, ill sell it for 6 >buy 20 pizzas >sell all of them to random people pretending to be a delivery guy >40 dollar profit for selling 20 pizzas >do this when i need extra money
: Anonymous 03/16/21(Tue)11:22:47 No.849732160 >be me >get bored >order a pizza >pretend to be a pizza delivery guy >deliver pizzas to random people >hope to find a qt girl who lives alone and who likes pizza 154 KB PNG >thats all i need >eventually run into a few >p--- lied to me, whatever >around 70% of people actually decide to pay me for my pizza >others say they didnt order it >no loss >i guess people want pizzas some people just dont order them >idea.jpg >a pizza is 4 dollars at the store, ill sell it for 6 >buy 20 pizzas >sell all of them to random people pretending to be a delivery guy >40 dollar profit for selling 20 pizzas >do this when i need extra money

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