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Anons brother cyberf*cks himself | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 767715027 43 min. ago My step brother is a fat cringy neckbeard, i'm bored as f--- right now so heres some cringe. >Few years ago, both in high school >We make our own anime forum to f--- around with >We get a few members >One "girl" starts posting on our forum >Says shes super in love with step brother >In forum chat, they both are having cyber sex in front of everyone >He didn't realize that i'm an admin and can see IP's 78.1 kB JPG >He was literally logging in as both the girl and himself and was essentially having cyber sex with himself
Anonymous | 767715027 43 min. ago My step brother is a fat cringy neckbeard, i'm bored as f--- right now so heres some cringe. >Few years ago, both in high school >We make our own anime forum to f--- around with >We get a few members >One "girl" starts posting on our forum >Says shes super in love with step brother >In forum chat, they both are having cyber sex in front of everyone >He didn't realize that i'm an admin and can see IP's 78.1 kB JPG >He was literally logging in as both the girl and himself and was essentially having cyber sex with himself

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Anon doesn’t care | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: W5LVJQ2V) Someone please explain to me 05/16/21(Sun)13:00:47 No.321859706 The Palestine X Israel conflict like im 5yo 188 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: GYo2t5u1 ) 05/16/21(Sun)13:02:06 No.321859883 1601717005308.gif 24 KB GIF >>321859706 (OP)# not your problem >>321861165 # >>321864751 # >>321868464 # >>321871645 # >>321872382 # >>321873368 # >>321874044 # >>321874045 # >>321876078 # >>321881125 # >>321887329 # >>321890085 # >>321891701 #
: Anonymous (ID: W5LVJQ2V) Someone please explain to me 05/16/21(Sun)13:00:47 No.321859706 The Palestine X Israel conflict like im 5yo 188 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: GYo2t5u1 ) 05/16/21(Sun)13:02:06 No.321859883 1601717005308.gif 24 KB GIF >>321859706 (OP)# not your problem >>321861165 # >>321864751 # >>321868464 # >>321871645 # >>321872382 # >>321873368 # >>321874044 # >>321874045 # >>321876078 # >>321881125 # >>321887329 # >>321890085 # >>321891701 #

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Anon solicits a prostitute | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)20:38:52 No.845378460 >f--- h----- >having sex doesn't immediately solve all my problems w-- bros you lied to me 238 KB JPG : Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)20:40:30 No.845378539 >>845378460 (OP) # >he fell for it Got another one, boys
: Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)20:38:52 No.845378460 >f--- h----- >having sex doesn't immediately solve all my problems w-- bros you lied to me 238 KB JPG : Anonymous 01/21/21(Thu)20:40:30 No.845378539 >>845378460 (OP) # >he fell for it Got another one, boys

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Anon has a panic attack | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/28/18(Sun)18:44:16 No.48965458 >think about moving arm >moves arm >just moved matter using nothing but my mind how? >have panic attack 150 KB PNG
: Anonymous 10/28/18(Sun)18:44:16 No.48965458 >think about moving arm >moves arm >just moved matter using nothing but my mind how? >have panic attack 150 KB PNG

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Anon is immature | /r/Greentext

Eonymous 12/24/21(Fri)23:41:40 No.66706831 >28 years old >still behave like an angsty teenager 87 KB PNG 16 Replies / 2 Images View Thread
Eonymous 12/24/21(Fri)23:41:40 No.66706831 >28 years old >still behave like an angsty teenager 87 KB PNG 16 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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Anon compromises | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/23/21(Thu)07:59:46 No.66681455 >incels and trannies are both considered losers rejected by society Why can't we be friends with each other at 53 KB JPG least? : Anonymous 12/23/21(Thu)08:00:57 No.66681463 because trannies are worse than incels by miles t. t-----
: Anonymous 12/23/21(Thu)07:59:46 No.66681455 >incels and trannies are both considered losers rejected by society Why can't we be friends with each other at 53 KB JPG least? : Anonymous 12/23/21(Thu)08:00:57 No.66681463 because trannies are worse than incels by miles t. t-----

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Anons dog has balls | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12 minutes ago 869279927 >mom gets me a present for Christmas >Tells me it's in my room >run to my room and on my bed is a puppy >Beautiful specimen, golden lab >mum walks back down to main room to talk to rest of fam >Autism kicks in >Grab peanut butter jar >Immediately dips erect c--- fully in >Show it to the dog >Dog does it's thing >Reach climax after roughly 3 minutes >Pick the dog up to clean it's face of peanut butter and coomer fluid >notice it's c--- and balls Be honest /b, am Ia f-----? I thought it was a bitch. Should I just kill myself for being disgusting enough to do sexual things with a male sexed organism? I feel like a disgusting f----- failure to society. 1 REPLY
Anonymous 12 minutes ago 869279927 >mom gets me a present for Christmas >Tells me it's in my room >run to my room and on my bed is a puppy >Beautiful specimen, golden lab >mum walks back down to main room to talk to rest of fam >Autism kicks in >Grab peanut butter jar >Immediately dips erect c--- fully in >Show it to the dog >Dog does it's thing >Reach climax after roughly 3 minutes >Pick the dog up to clean it's face of peanut butter and coomer fluid >notice it's c--- and balls Be honest /b, am Ia f-----? I thought it was a bitch. Should I just kill myself for being disgusting enough to do sexual things with a male sexed organism? I feel like a disgusting f----- failure to society. 1 REPLY

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Anon goes to McDonald’s | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: R9BMFlod) O 12/23/21(Thu)08:41:58 No.353334567 THM Eく MPINFINI4ド THRMFT T& THM NYE EXN T& FNN &r PMYTMRI <IPINYFTI&. THM MPIN PITHI} THM りKく ドKKMARり T& KR&NSTM THM EMP P&RIN &RNMR THET YMMP4 144 KB JPG T父NMHTRSN THM PMYT Fトス IHTFENIAN 父トMXFMRナZMI TR Rフコ AドAMR THM FTISトーりナドTMりFRM スコ4TRSAMN ドトNESRNMRり MRFUMN. ThRFメ RILMAFトN&ナコ AYITHNXフAドド<M44 THM YKES: THM P&DINMR'4 PRITIHX4 TMNH NA PHFT NHT BM スッナI. Anonymous (ID: skkD8GaG) 12/23/21(Thu)08:43:16 No.353334684 >>353334567 >Sir this is a McDonald's
Anonymous (ID: R9BMFlod) O 12/23/21(Thu)08:41:58 No.353334567 THM Eく MPINFINI4ド THRMFT T& THM NYE EXN T& FNN &r PMYTMRI <IPINYFTI&. THM MPIN PITHI} THM りKく ドKKMARり T& KR&NSTM THM EMP P&RIN &RNMR THET YMMP4 144 KB JPG T父NMHTRSN THM PMYT Fトス IHTFENIAN 父トMXFMRナZMI TR Rフコ AドAMR THM FTISトーりナドTMりFRM スコ4TRSAMN ドトNESRNMRり MRFUMN. ThRFメ RILMAFトN&ナコ AYITHNXフAドド<M44 THM YKES: THM P&DINMR'4 PRITIHX4 TMNH NA PHFT NHT BM スッナI. Anonymous (ID: skkD8GaG) 12/23/21(Thu)08:43:16 No.353334684 >>353334567 >Sir this is a McDonald's

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Anon has a final wish | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/23/21(Thu)16:30:14 No.66679661 You would kill a lot of people with the Deathnote wouldn't you? 1.48 MB JPG : Anonymous 12/23/21(Thu)17:20:11 No.66680011 >>66679661 (OP) # >first thing I write is my own name >suffocates between the thighs of a pretty girl
: Anonymous 12/23/21(Thu)16:30:14 No.66679661 You would kill a lot of people with the Deathnote wouldn't you? 1.48 MB JPG : Anonymous 12/23/21(Thu)17:20:11 No.66680011 >>66679661 (OP) # >first thing I write is my own name >suffocates between the thighs of a pretty girl

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Anon goes pew pew | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/23/21(Thu)23:43:24 No.869190614 >Be me >Buy PC off friend >Download CS:GO >Get a rank Silver 2 >High skill ceiling, but learning the 6 KB JPG ropes >Watch Warowl YT vids to git gud >Get £30 off work Xmas bonus >Buy Steam vouchers >Buy Empress field tested AK skin >Play a match >Team are all Ruskie squeakers >Having a good match >Top frag for my team inthezone.png >1v5 >Kill 3, 2 left >Die >"omg all skins but can't play" >Squeakers vote to kick >Kicked Pic related
: Anonymous 12/23/21(Thu)23:43:24 No.869190614 >Be me >Buy PC off friend >Download CS:GO >Get a rank Silver 2 >High skill ceiling, but learning the 6 KB JPG ropes >Watch Warowl YT vids to git gud >Get £30 off work Xmas bonus >Buy Steam vouchers >Buy Empress field tested AK skin >Play a match >Team are all Ruskie squeakers >Having a good match >Top frag for my team inthezone.png >1v5 >Kill 3, 2 left >Die >"omg all skins but can't play" >Squeakers vote to kick >Kicked Pic related

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Anon pretends to be a normal human being | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/04/20(Sun)10:43:34 No.60317976 >take driving test >do everything perfect >yellow light >speed up to pass it like a normal human being BE STRONG HIDE YOUR PAIN 1.18 MB JPG >this means I fail the driving test >>60317992 #
: Anonymous 10/04/20(Sun)10:43:34 No.60317976 >take driving test >do everything perfect >yellow light >speed up to pass it like a normal human being BE STRONG HIDE YOUR PAIN 1.18 MB JPG >this means I fail the driving test >>60317992 #

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Anon experiences weed | /r/Greentext

677EFC5B-49F0-4795-9077-D60919490070.jpg 445 KB JPG Why does weed unironically turn me left wing? : Anonymous (ID: SohzZmW/ 12/04/21(Sat)20:40:41 No.350756457 It turns me the opposite. When I smoke weed i become dangerously antisemitic but when I'm sober I am just regular antisemitic >>350757065 # >>350757676 # >>350758562 # >>350759194 # >>350766059 # >>350766919 # >>350767086 # >>350767140 # >>350771330 # >>350771551 # >>350771970 # >>350772302 # >>350773019 # >>350775186 # >>350775679 # >>350775772 #
677EFC5B-49F0-4795-9077-D60919490070.jpg 445 KB JPG Why does weed unironically turn me left wing? : Anonymous (ID: SohzZmW/ 12/04/21(Sat)20:40:41 No.350756457 It turns me the opposite. When I smoke weed i become dangerously antisemitic but when I'm sober I am just regular antisemitic >>350757065 # >>350757676 # >>350758562 # >>350759194 # >>350766059 # >>350766919 # >>350767086 # >>350767140 # >>350771330 # >>350771551 # >>350771970 # >>350772302 # >>350773019 # >>350775186 # >>350775679 # >>350775772 #

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why we started | /r/Greentext

File: 1360259435926.jpg-(140 KB, 600x902, 1359659865073.jpg) O Anonymous 02/07/13(Thu)12:50 No.17585123 Replies: >>17585250 >>17585284 >>17585287 >>17585296 ITT: reasons we started lifting >be 17, the summer before college >camping with best friend, bros for 10 years, been through so much s--- together >be dyel, but bro played football and lifted >trying to teach me about lifting, wants us to pick up girls together next year in college >hiking in the afternoon, we're pretty far into the forest, nobody else in sight >bro is hiking up ahead of me, we're both enjoying the quiet and connecting with nature >hear a massive cracking sound, thinking about it still sends chills down my spine >crack is followed by the crashing sound of something falling >something is a giant tree >falling towards my bro >try to warn him but it's too late, the tree is on top of him >race over to help >he's trapped underneath, the tree is on his chest, he can't breathe, he's choking to death >try to lift the tree, put everything I have into it, it won't budge >soon he's not breathing anymore >watch the life fade from his eyes >doctors later say he would have died anyway >can't shake the feeling I could have saved him >3 years later I can still see his face >every time I deadlift, I imagine I'm lifting that tree off him >for that one brief moment, the pain goes away RIP my friend Anonymous 02/07/13(Thu)12:52 No.17585154 File: 1360259522567.png-(20 KB, 750x750, 13246448012.png) right in the feels, OP, right in the feels...
File: 1360259435926.jpg-(140 KB, 600x902, 1359659865073.jpg) O Anonymous 02/07/13(Thu)12:50 No.17585123 Replies: >>17585250 >>17585284 >>17585287 >>17585296 ITT: reasons we started lifting >be 17, the summer before college >camping with best friend, bros for 10 years, been through so much s--- together >be dyel, but bro played football and lifted >trying to teach me about lifting, wants us to pick up girls together next year in college >hiking in the afternoon, we're pretty far into the forest, nobody else in sight >bro is hiking up ahead of me, we're both enjoying the quiet and connecting with nature >hear a massive cracking sound, thinking about it still sends chills down my spine >crack is followed by the crashing sound of something falling >something is a giant tree >falling towards my bro >try to warn him but it's too late, the tree is on top of him >race over to help >he's trapped underneath, the tree is on his chest, he can't breathe, he's choking to death >try to lift the tree, put everything I have into it, it won't budge >soon he's not breathing anymore >watch the life fade from his eyes >doctors later say he would have died anyway >can't shake the feeling I could have saved him >3 years later I can still see his face >every time I deadlift, I imagine I'm lifting that tree off him >for that one brief moment, the pain goes away RIP my friend Anonymous 02/07/13(Thu)12:52 No.17585154 File: 1360259522567.png-(20 KB, 750x750, 13246448012.png) right in the feels, OP, right in the feels...

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Anon is on that millionaire grindset | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I think I'm in trouble, boys(...) 11/04/21(Thu)18:36:09 No.66026795 >get drunk >bike to the house of my ex who cheated on me over three years ago >about to ring the doorbell >better idea 1.98 MB GIF >take out my d--- and piss on the doormat >bike back home >sleep >wake up to flood of texts >ex sent video of me pissing on her doorstep >"Care to explain?????" >"Not really?", I reply >turn cellphone off
: Anonymous I think I'm in trouble, boys(...) 11/04/21(Thu)18:36:09 No.66026795 >get drunk >bike to the house of my ex who cheated on me over three years ago >about to ring the doorbell >better idea 1.98 MB GIF >take out my d--- and piss on the doormat >bike back home >sleep >wake up to flood of texts >ex sent video of me pissing on her doorstep >"Care to explain?????" >"Not really?", I reply >turn cellphone off

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Anon doesn’t like the vax | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/25/21(Sat)02:52:20 No.66707955 >IT'S SAFE AND EFFECTIVE. >VAX. >NOW. >WE WILL EVEN GIVE YOU A FREE DONUT IF YOU GET THE 203 KB PNG VAXXINE. >STOP *clap emoji* KILLING *clap emoji* GRANDMA *clap emoji*. >DO YOU WANT TO TAKE THE VAXXINE NOW, CHUD, OR DO YOU WANT IT TO BECOMEMA NDATORY???? >JUST TAKE THE VAXXINENOW AND THEN WE CAN STOP WEARING MASKS. >COVID WILL NEVER END, CHUD, UNLESS YOU. TAKE. THE. VAXXINE. NO W.
: Anonymous 12/25/21(Sat)02:52:20 No.66707955 >IT'S SAFE AND EFFECTIVE. >VAX. >NOW. >WE WILL EVEN GIVE YOU A FREE DONUT IF YOU GET THE 203 KB PNG VAXXINE. >STOP *clap emoji* KILLING *clap emoji* GRANDMA *clap emoji*. >DO YOU WANT TO TAKE THE VAXXINE NOW, CHUD, OR DO YOU WANT IT TO BECOMEMA NDATORY???? >JUST TAKE THE VAXXINENOW AND THEN WE CAN STOP WEARING MASKS. >COVID WILL NEVER END, CHUD, UNLESS YOU. TAKE. THE. VAXXINE. NO W.

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Anon enjoys the christmas spirit | /r/Greentext

: onymous 12/24/21(Fri)20:23:53 No.66695115 >tfw triple amputee What the f--- even is the point of anything... i will never have a meaningful existence beyond being a completely useless cripple... 276 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/24/21(Fri)20:26:08 No.66695129 >>66695115 (OP)# Haha your left leg is wearing a christmas hat
: onymous 12/24/21(Fri)20:23:53 No.66695115 >tfw triple amputee What the f--- even is the point of anything... i will never have a meaningful existence beyond being a completely useless cripple... 276 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/24/21(Fri)20:26:08 No.66695129 >>66695115 (OP)# Haha your left leg is wearing a christmas hat

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School stinks | /r/Greentext


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Anon’s grandmother is sure he’ll find someone who appreciates him someday | /r/Greentext

onymous 12/24/21(Fri)20:39:20 No.66703451 why cant things just go right for once.jpg 49 KB JPG >Thread saids that if you ever feel like you're ugly, you can always ask your grandma and she'll tell you you're her handsome boy >Visiting family for Christmas, this is the perfect time to ask, my grandmother has always been sweet to me >Go up to my grandma and ask her "Grandma, am I handsome?" >Grandma smiles at me and pats my cheek >"Oh anon," she says, "It's not all about looks. You'll find a girl who appreciates you someday, I know it." >Stand there in shock for a moment, struggle with the urge to reply to her "So you think I'm ugly?" >Just say "Thanks grandma" and give her a hug %3D So, even my own grandmother thinks I'm ugly... What a wonderful Christmas...
onymous 12/24/21(Fri)20:39:20 No.66703451 why cant things just go right for once.jpg 49 KB JPG >Thread saids that if you ever feel like you're ugly, you can always ask your grandma and she'll tell you you're her handsome boy >Visiting family for Christmas, this is the perfect time to ask, my grandmother has always been sweet to me >Go up to my grandma and ask her "Grandma, am I handsome?" >Grandma smiles at me and pats my cheek >"Oh anon," she says, "It's not all about looks. You'll find a girl who appreciates you someday, I know it." >Stand there in shock for a moment, struggle with the urge to reply to her "So you think I'm ugly?" >Just say "Thanks grandma" and give her a hug %3D So, even my own grandmother thinks I'm ugly... What a wonderful Christmas...

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Anon remembers | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: Mz+F72xl) 04/23/14(Wed)02:24:34 No.543522159 >be 3 years old >standing in the living room next to leather sofa >for no apparent reason think to myself "i will remember this moment" >still do
Anonymous (ID: Mz+F72xl) 04/23/14(Wed)02:24:34 No.543522159 >be 3 years old >standing in the living room next to leather sofa >for no apparent reason think to myself "i will remember this moment" >still do

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Tard remembers | /r/Greentext

8 KB, 600x484) Anonymous 08/17/18(Fri)14:13:23 No.777423877 >tard story from a while back >so the special ed teacher's son died in a car accident years prior >really sad, well known throughout town >couple years later >sped teacher helping the tards with math >one little tard looks at teacher >"hey mrs. anonderson, rember your son?" > she looks at him, nods >"he died" >mfw teacher is holding back tears >tard goes back to doing math poorly I guess tards do have good memory
8 KB, 600x484) Anonymous 08/17/18(Fri)14:13:23 No.777423877 >tard story from a while back >so the special ed teacher's son died in a car accident years prior >really sad, well known throughout town >couple years later >sped teacher helping the tards with math >one little tard looks at teacher >"hey mrs. anonderson, rember your son?" > she looks at him, nods >"he died" >mfw teacher is holding back tears >tard goes back to doing math poorly I guess tards do have good memory

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