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Anon is a moron | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/28/20(Mon)07:10:26 No.61590654 >get rejected by my crush >she tells meI should try walking in her shoes >buy shoes similar to hers >everyone starts calling me f----- 63 KB JPG 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 12/28/20(Mon)07:10:26 No.61590654 >get rejected by my crush >she tells meI should try walking in her shoes >buy shoes similar to hers >everyone starts calling me f----- 63 KB JPG 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Attack from Titan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/29/21(Wed)17:10:01 No.66767123 cover1.jpg 458 KB JPG >gets rejected by a woman >immediately attempts to kill the guy dating her >plans to murder her in dramatic fashion and destroy an entire city Incelposters, why aren't you Titanmaxxing?
: Anonymous 12/29/21(Wed)17:10:01 No.66767123 cover1.jpg 458 KB JPG >gets rejected by a woman >immediately attempts to kill the guy dating her >plans to murder her in dramatic fashion and destroy an entire city Incelposters, why aren't you Titanmaxxing?

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Anon goes to the gym | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/28/21(Tue)18:25:50 No.64920470 >>64919877 # >be home gym master race >constantly see threads on //fit/ about annoying zoomers at the gym >refuse to believe it's actually as 157 KB GIF bad as people say >eventually outgrow what little home equipment I have, start going to the nearest gym because weights are expensive >it's filled with zoomers >every single one of them looks, acts, and talks exactly like /fit/ says they do >hoards of broccoli topped zoomer males standing around filming each other bench 1 plate in the squat racks >zoomer women everywhere staring at their phones on the benches, on machines, and in the squat racks >hear multiple SHEEEEEESHes and no caps during my workout >go home and immediately buy some dude's home gym setup of Facebook marketplace for 3 grand I'm never going back to the gym, bros >>64920515 # >>64920516 # >>64920756 # >>64924483 #
: Anonymous 12/28/21(Tue)18:25:50 No.64920470 >>64919877 # >be home gym master race >constantly see threads on //fit/ about annoying zoomers at the gym >refuse to believe it's actually as 157 KB GIF bad as people say >eventually outgrow what little home equipment I have, start going to the nearest gym because weights are expensive >it's filled with zoomers >every single one of them looks, acts, and talks exactly like /fit/ says they do >hoards of broccoli topped zoomer males standing around filming each other bench 1 plate in the squat racks >zoomer women everywhere staring at their phones on the benches, on machines, and in the squat racks >hear multiple SHEEEEEESHes and no caps during my workout >go home and immediately buy some dude's home gym setup of Facebook marketplace for 3 grand I'm never going back to the gym, bros >>64920515 # >>64920516 # >>64920756 # >>64924483 #

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Anon has had enough | /r/Greentext

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO L 1765434598764.jpg, 64KİB, 711x718 Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2020 13:27:24 No.59011713 View Report happened last year, but i'll greentext it >be me, work at a big tech company >leftist ultra-woke usual corporate nonsense etc >i'm 6'2 and lifting for 2.5 years, working up to 2/3/4/5 >wear polo shirts to work bc comfy and collared/professional, downside is everyone can see my physique >i outright refuse to talk about weightlifting/fitness to my coworkers to avoid becoming a stereotype >always change the subject, or say "yeah I used to lift in the past but not anymore" >but i'm obviously very muscular, especially by normie standards >normie standards are so f-----, they think i'm mr olympia while to me i'm a work in progress >i can always feel the unspoken resentment from other ppl tho >thotty summer interns and vendor sales hoes always approach me, plenty of mires >some fat girl on a team adjacent to mine always making weird fitness jokes at my expense >not a landwhale (yet) but extremely overweight, massive feminist, white BLM activist >approaching the wall at warp speed and secretly knows it (they all do) >theres a disagreement on how to use engineering resources >"hey, i'll bet anon over there probably wants to settle the debate by arm wrestling lol" >constant weird annoying comments like that >one day i get to a meeting 5 minutes late bc i had to walk across two buildings to get there >"well well nice of you to join us there protein shake" >enough >"well I'm here now, sorry I'm late McFlurry" >room with a dozen people in it falls silent >everyone staring at me like i just murdered a child or something >literally 15 seconds of silence >fatty is in shock, doesn't say anything for the entire meeting >next day >manager requests a 10am meeting >walk into the room, its him and 2 HR people >assigned 4 weeks of sensitivity training >online courses on diversity in the workplace >mfw around fats never relax
View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO L 1765434598764.jpg, 64KİB, 711x718 Anonymous Wed 23 Dec 2020 13:27:24 No.59011713 View Report happened last year, but i'll greentext it >be me, work at a big tech company >leftist ultra-woke usual corporate nonsense etc >i'm 6'2 and lifting for 2.5 years, working up to 2/3/4/5 >wear polo shirts to work bc comfy and collared/professional, downside is everyone can see my physique >i outright refuse to talk about weightlifting/fitness to my coworkers to avoid becoming a stereotype >always change the subject, or say "yeah I used to lift in the past but not anymore" >but i'm obviously very muscular, especially by normie standards >normie standards are so f-----, they think i'm mr olympia while to me i'm a work in progress >i can always feel the unspoken resentment from other ppl tho >thotty summer interns and vendor sales hoes always approach me, plenty of mires >some fat girl on a team adjacent to mine always making weird fitness jokes at my expense >not a landwhale (yet) but extremely overweight, massive feminist, white BLM activist >approaching the wall at warp speed and secretly knows it (they all do) >theres a disagreement on how to use engineering resources >"hey, i'll bet anon over there probably wants to settle the debate by arm wrestling lol" >constant weird annoying comments like that >one day i get to a meeting 5 minutes late bc i had to walk across two buildings to get there >"well well nice of you to join us there protein shake" >enough >"well I'm here now, sorry I'm late McFlurry" >room with a dozen people in it falls silent >everyone staring at me like i just murdered a child or something >literally 15 seconds of silence >fatty is in shock, doesn't say anything for the entire meeting >next day >manager requests a 10am meeting >walk into the room, its him and 2 HR people >assigned 4 weeks of sensitivity training >online courses on diversity in the workplace >mfw around fats never relax

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Anon doesn't understand anti vax | /r/Greentext


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Anon has a dream | /r/Greentext


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Anon got a kiss | /r/Greentext


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Anon is petty | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/29/21(Wed)11:13:53 No.583066529 >little sister deletes your save 520 KB GIF : Anonymous 12/29/21(Wed)11:14:40 No.583066601 >I delete her virginity 243 KB PNG >>583066827 # >>583068608 # >>583069902 # >>583070656 # >>583072378 # >>583073867 # >>583076216 # >>583078215 # >>583078375 # >>583078896 # >>583079287 # >>583079823 # >>583080181 # >>583080278 # >>583082672 # >>583082852 # >>583083424 #
: Anonymous 12/29/21(Wed)11:13:53 No.583066529 >little sister deletes your save 520 KB GIF : Anonymous 12/29/21(Wed)11:14:40 No.583066601 >I delete her virginity 243 KB PNG >>583066827 # >>583068608 # >>583069902 # >>583070656 # >>583072378 # >>583073867 # >>583076216 # >>583078215 # >>583078375 # >>583078896 # >>583079287 # >>583079823 # >>583080181 # >>583080278 # >>583082672 # >>583082852 # >>583083424 #

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Anon has a dream. | /r/Greentext

File: 1409583218050.jpg (79 KB, 515x600) O Anonymous 12/28/21(Tue)23:05:32 No.869524298 [Reply] >be me >had pretty good year >have dream on christmas eve night >pure blackness, just a booming voice >"You will experience a great loss next year." >"You cannot prepare for it." >"You will not be ready for it." >"It will come unexpectedly." >wake up terrified because i never have dreams like that, at most just a weird short scene >mom calls me few hours later to wish merry christmas >asks if im okay, senses something wrong in voice >play it off as tiredness >still shaken from dream >still thinking about it what does this mean?
File: 1409583218050.jpg (79 KB, 515x600) O Anonymous 12/28/21(Tue)23:05:32 No.869524298 [Reply] >be me >had pretty good year >have dream on christmas eve night >pure blackness, just a booming voice >"You will experience a great loss next year." >"You cannot prepare for it." >"You will not be ready for it." >"It will come unexpectedly." >wake up terrified because i never have dreams like that, at most just a weird short scene >mom calls me few hours later to wish merry christmas >asks if im okay, senses something wrong in voice >play it off as tiredness >still shaken from dream >still thinking about it what does this mean?

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Anon's an e-girl | /r/Greentext


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Anon can finally workout in peace | /r/Greentext

>Doing deadlifts >Some f------ kid runs around my gym >Runs into my leg as I'm trying to lockout the lift 58 KB JPG >l drop the bar into the ground, loudly >Tell the kid to piss off >His mother shows up, angry as f--- >Tells me to stop lifting around the kids >Reply that she should keep the kids away from me >Next day >F------ kid is bothering me again when im doing chest >Slam the weights loudly right next to him >Kid cries, tells his mom that I'm scary >The mom flips out, gives me a huge rant about what a meathead I am >l yell back, she eventually starts crying and runs off with both her kids >She moves out, never see her or the little s---- again >Homegym masterrace
>Doing deadlifts >Some f------ kid runs around my gym >Runs into my leg as I'm trying to lockout the lift 58 KB JPG >l drop the bar into the ground, loudly >Tell the kid to piss off >His mother shows up, angry as f--- >Tells me to stop lifting around the kids >Reply that she should keep the kids away from me >Next day >F------ kid is bothering me again when im doing chest >Slam the weights loudly right next to him >Kid cries, tells his mom that I'm scary >The mom flips out, gives me a huge rant about what a meathead I am >l yell back, she eventually starts crying and runs off with both her kids >She moves out, never see her or the little s---- again >Homegym masterrace

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Anon becomes Chad | /r/Greentext


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Anon Helps the Elderly. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous No.46107197 1 hour ago >fixing notebook for a ~70 years old lady >comes, pays, asks about gaming tier GPUS for her desktop >little took back I inquire about the price range and what games, solitaire, sudoku, puzzle games... >nope, I play the Assasin >Assassin's creed? >yes, on my grandsons console, I just love Venice >she pauses >and killing people 3 replies
Anonymous No.46107197 1 hour ago >fixing notebook for a ~70 years old lady >comes, pays, asks about gaming tier GPUS for her desktop >little took back I inquire about the price range and what games, solitaire, sudoku, puzzle games... >nope, I play the Assasin >Assassin's creed? >yes, on my grandsons console, I just love Venice >she pauses >and killing people 3 replies

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Anon is kinda lonely | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/08/12(Sat)22:04:14 No.3708936 Replies: >>3708972 >>3708988 >>3709026 >>3709027 >>3709038 >>3709040 2>3714711 223714725 >Friday, about 6 PM >In room, browsing 4chan and playing Minecraft >Dad comes in >"Hey buddy, have any plans for the weekend?" >"Not really, no." >"Why don't you go out with some friends? It's a nice night." >Conversation continues for another five minutes >Dad asks about girls and my "friends" >l try to dodge around admitting I have no friends and have no experience with girls >But he knows >"Ok buddy, just let me know if you ever want a ride somewhere, or you can borrow my car any time you want. >Pats me on the shoulder and leaves >l get back to Minecraft >After a few minutes, feel thirsty >No drinks in my room >Venture out of my room and go to the kitchen >Hear my father in the living room, crying >Look around the corner >He's looking through photo albums at pictures of me >"Hey Dad." >He looks up, trying to hide that he was crying >"Im going out with some friends, can I still borrow the car?" >He smiles the happiest smile I have seen in years >"Sure thing buddy." >He gets up and hugs me, tears in his eyes >l get dressed, get in the car and leave >l drive to an empty parking lot in an industrial area >l go to sleep in the back seat >Return home the next morning >Pretend I was out with friends all night >Dad hugs me again I've been doing this almost every weekend for months now.
Anonymous 09/08/12(Sat)22:04:14 No.3708936 Replies: >>3708972 >>3708988 >>3709026 >>3709027 >>3709038 >>3709040 2>3714711 223714725 >Friday, about 6 PM >In room, browsing 4chan and playing Minecraft >Dad comes in >"Hey buddy, have any plans for the weekend?" >"Not really, no." >"Why don't you go out with some friends? It's a nice night." >Conversation continues for another five minutes >Dad asks about girls and my "friends" >l try to dodge around admitting I have no friends and have no experience with girls >But he knows >"Ok buddy, just let me know if you ever want a ride somewhere, or you can borrow my car any time you want. >Pats me on the shoulder and leaves >l get back to Minecraft >After a few minutes, feel thirsty >No drinks in my room >Venture out of my room and go to the kitchen >Hear my father in the living room, crying >Look around the corner >He's looking through photo albums at pictures of me >"Hey Dad." >He looks up, trying to hide that he was crying >"Im going out with some friends, can I still borrow the car?" >He smiles the happiest smile I have seen in years >"Sure thing buddy." >He gets up and hugs me, tears in his eyes >l get dressed, get in the car and leave >l drive to an empty parking lot in an industrial area >l go to sleep in the back seat >Return home the next morning >Pretend I was out with friends all night >Dad hugs me again I've been doing this almost every weekend for months now.

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Nose to the grindstone | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/29/21(Wed)10:11:37 No.66762370 >be me >download grinder since not gay but want people vying over my massive slong >guy adds me, chats me up & asks for pic >send c--- pic and he sends in return, he's quite big Ceaser salad with no lettuce 118 KB JPG >says he wants to suck my d--- >fake tell him OK (I like to make the appointment and then never show up. Lowering AIDS numbers one by one). >he sends address >recognize it >its one of my close friends >delete account and app >he doesn't know it was me, but I know it was him >he is super conservative wat do now
: Anonymous 12/29/21(Wed)10:11:37 No.66762370 >be me >download grinder since not gay but want people vying over my massive slong >guy adds me, chats me up & asks for pic >send c--- pic and he sends in return, he's quite big Ceaser salad with no lettuce 118 KB JPG >says he wants to suck my d--- >fake tell him OK (I like to make the appointment and then never show up. Lowering AIDS numbers one by one). >he sends address >recognize it >its one of my close friends >delete account and app >he doesn't know it was me, but I know it was him >he is super conservative wat do now

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By the rocket's red glare | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/29/21(Wed)11:02:32 No.66762911 >be american >use 4chan nocturnally to speak to sane people >morning arrives >the rest of the americans wake up >board devolves into a complete 102 KB JPG shitshow God damn it.
: Anonymous 12/29/21(Wed)11:02:32 No.66762911 >be american >use 4chan nocturnally to speak to sane people >morning arrives >the rest of the americans wake up >board devolves into a complete 102 KB JPG shitshow God damn it.

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Anon finally makes a move | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 02/17/19(Sun)18:42:55 No.792881471 >>792881665 >be friends with hot qtpie >want more but got friendzoned >her bf is a jacked alpha dude >he would kill me if I f----- around with his gf >lonely summer day >chillin at her place like we used to >this time with alcohol >starts talking about sex life >we get homy >l start rubbing the back then the thighs >literally diamonds >l start advancing knowing I'll get rejected >to my surprise I get a h------ >l grow confidence >we end up f------ like animals all night >he says we shouldn't let her know about this We high fived like bros then laughed about how absurd this all was.
O Anonymous 02/17/19(Sun)18:42:55 No.792881471 >>792881665 >be friends with hot qtpie >want more but got friendzoned >her bf is a jacked alpha dude >he would kill me if I f----- around with his gf >lonely summer day >chillin at her place like we used to >this time with alcohol >starts talking about sex life >we get homy >l start rubbing the back then the thighs >literally diamonds >l start advancing knowing I'll get rejected >to my surprise I get a h------ >l grow confidence >we end up f------ like animals all night >he says we shouldn't let her know about this We high fived like bros then laughed about how absurd this all was.

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Anon becomes Superanon but at what cost... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/13/21(Mon)20:44:55 No.66546023 >get an MRI and CT scan >lump on the left side of my brain >they notice I am slowly acting different >go manic and gained a new personality >suddenly dont have the capacity to feel fear 438 KB GIF >pain runs my body >went out to a bar >the first drunkard that talked to me wrong >threw him 10 feet away >hes crying that I hurt his back Wooo becoming insane because of a brain tumor is f------ fun. I am missing so much cognitive function now. I feel like I can test anyone and not die. Only scary part is low inhibition. I just spent $13k on nothing and f----- two girls in one night. I am not me anymore : Anonymous 12/13/21(Mon)20:56:46 No.66546134 >>66546023 (OP) # You'll be dead soon. Adios anon.
: Anonymous 12/13/21(Mon)20:44:55 No.66546023 >get an MRI and CT scan >lump on the left side of my brain >they notice I am slowly acting different >go manic and gained a new personality >suddenly dont have the capacity to feel fear 438 KB GIF >pain runs my body >went out to a bar >the first drunkard that talked to me wrong >threw him 10 feet away >hes crying that I hurt his back Wooo becoming insane because of a brain tumor is f------ fun. I am missing so much cognitive function now. I feel like I can test anyone and not die. Only scary part is low inhibition. I just spent $13k on nothing and f----- two girls in one night. I am not me anymore : Anonymous 12/13/21(Mon)20:56:46 No.66546134 >>66546023 (OP) # You'll be dead soon. Adios anon.

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Pic related. | /r/Greentext

>be 16 >hear dogs obviously attacking something in back yard >go out and get them to leave it alone 33 кВ PNG >oh s--- it's a bloody possum >think its dead, go to put it in garbage >notice Its still breathing >decide to put it out of it's misery >grab a broken skateboard and smash it over It's head >possum starts convulsing >oh god why aren't you dying >keep beating it >feel like Christopher bale killing Jared letto In American psycho >it finally dies >check the body and see the dogs barely scratched it >mfw I remember possums play dead
>be 16 >hear dogs obviously attacking something in back yard >go out and get them to leave it alone 33 кВ PNG >oh s--- it's a bloody possum >think its dead, go to put it in garbage >notice Its still breathing >decide to put it out of it's misery >grab a broken skateboard and smash it over It's head >possum starts convulsing >oh god why aren't you dying >keep beating it >feel like Christopher bale killing Jared letto In American psycho >it finally dies >check the body and see the dogs barely scratched it >mfw I remember possums play dead

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The sequel | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/18/19(Tue)12:01:28 No.51231958 chick2.jpg 27 KB JPG >>51230229 # The one right on is the one that came in contact with my penis as it was falling >>51232013 # >51232062 # >51232288 # >51232292 # >>51232352 # >>51232376 # >>51232472 # >>51233838 # >>51233903 #
: Anonymous 06/18/19(Tue)12:01:28 No.51231958 chick2.jpg 27 KB JPG >>51230229 # The one right on is the one that came in contact with my penis as it was falling >>51232013 # >51232062 # >51232288 # >51232292 # >>51232352 # >>51232376 # >>51232472 # >>51233838 # >>51233903 #

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