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Anon finds love | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 01/18/22(Tue)07:50:58 No.870900548 Be me: 23 y/o living in Chicago > Lonely > Go to bar with friends > Drinking > See cute girl across from bar > Fit figure with huge honkers > Drink more shots > Watch her leave > idea.png > Follow her outside > Drag her into alleyway > R--- her hard > She says no entire time > Tells me she's not on birth control > "That's too bad" > C-- hard inside of her > After I pull out she smiling > Gives me her number > Ask her why > Turns out she is single with a massive r--- fetish Been together for 3 years and I still do her in alleyways whenever we go out
O Anonymous 01/18/22(Tue)07:50:58 No.870900548 Be me: 23 y/o living in Chicago > Lonely > Go to bar with friends > Drinking > See cute girl across from bar > Fit figure with huge honkers > Drink more shots > Watch her leave > idea.png > Follow her outside > Drag her into alleyway > R--- her hard > She says no entire time > Tells me she's not on birth control > "That's too bad" > C-- hard inside of her > After I pull out she smiling > Gives me her number > Ask her why > Turns out she is single with a massive r--- fetish Been together for 3 years and I still do her in alleyways whenever we go out

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Anon is from another timeline | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/17/22(Mon)11:29:16 No.67027727 >decided to reread about the Iranian embassy siege on 1980 >sources say that only a few hostages died and it was an overall success >distinctly remember reading years ago that the siege was a colossal failure and got way more civilians 161 KB JPG killed after an SAS f----- >also read that the embassy siege put the SAS in the public consciousness, became known to the public afterward whereas they were classified before, and the aftermath saw many have more faith in Thatcher's government >remember reading years ago that they were already known before this and the failure of the siege severely damaged their reputation, as well as there being a loss of faith in the British government afterwards What f------ timeline is this? Am I going insane? 24 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 01/17/22(Mon)11:29:16 No.67027727 >decided to reread about the Iranian embassy siege on 1980 >sources say that only a few hostages died and it was an overall success >distinctly remember reading years ago that the siege was a colossal failure and got way more civilians 161 KB JPG killed after an SAS f----- >also read that the embassy siege put the SAS in the public consciousness, became known to the public afterward whereas they were classified before, and the aftermath saw many have more faith in Thatcher's government >remember reading years ago that they were already known before this and the failure of the siege severely damaged their reputation, as well as there being a loss of faith in the British government afterwards What f------ timeline is this? Am I going insane? 24 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon gets laid | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/01/18(Thu)11:11:00 No.783768621 >>783768080 (OP) # >be me, 18 >get drunk >girl i'm dating also gets drunk >asks if i want to f--- >hell yeah >stick it in >c-- on 1st thrust >hell yeah
: Anonymous 11/01/18(Thu)11:11:00 No.783768621 >>783768080 (OP) # >be me, 18 >get drunk >girl i'm dating also gets drunk >asks if i want to f--- >hell yeah >stick it in >c-- on 1st thrust >hell yeah

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Anon is a procrastinator | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/01/18(Thu)20:30:36 No.49047062 >Have a whole week to do an assignment >Wait until the last 4 hours >have panic attack and total meltdown because 4 hours isn't enough to do it >have to try 58 KB PNG >do it in 2 hours >get 95% on the assignment >one week to do assignment >wait until the last 2 hours
: Anonymous 11/01/18(Thu)20:30:36 No.49047062 >Have a whole week to do an assignment >Wait until the last 4 hours >have panic attack and total meltdown because 4 hours isn't enough to do it >have to try 58 KB PNG >do it in 2 hours >get 95% on the assignment >one week to do assignment >wait until the last 2 hours

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Anon's thoughts about weed | /r/Greentext


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Anon lives in the big city | /r/Greentext


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Anons friend has an onlyfans | /r/Greentext


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I haven't seen Chris Brown in a while | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 49141130 1 órával ezelőtt •.. >Walk into biology class >Teacher has a bruise on her arm >Autistic spaz ask teacher how she got it >autism.mp4 >l scream out >"she got Chris Browned" >mfw when everyone is laughing >mfw I don't get into trouble 25,7 kB JPG 1 REPLY O IMAGES Anonymous | 49141950 25 perccel ezelőtt •.. >>49141130 (OP) The teacher didn't punish you because she felt sorry for you and took pity on you, because you are retarded. I was once a teacher and I would ignore the retards because I genuinely couldn't bring myself to make their life any worse than it was.
Anonymous | 49141130 1 órával ezelőtt •.. >Walk into biology class >Teacher has a bruise on her arm >Autistic spaz ask teacher how she got it >autism.mp4 >l scream out >"she got Chris Browned" >mfw when everyone is laughing >mfw I don't get into trouble 25,7 kB JPG 1 REPLY O IMAGES Anonymous | 49141950 25 perccel ezelőtt •.. >>49141130 (OP) The teacher didn't punish you because she felt sorry for you and took pity on you, because you are retarded. I was once a teacher and I would ignore the retards because I genuinely couldn't bring myself to make their life any worse than it was.

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Anon fails upward | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/17/22(Mon)17:06:19 No.67034628 >try to be as cringe and feminine as possible to make gf hate me >she likes me even more and wants to spend more time together This is totally not good. >will never escape her at this rate Goddamnit 90 KB JPG View Thread
: Anonymous 01/17/22(Mon)17:06:19 No.67034628 >try to be as cringe and feminine as possible to make gf hate me >she likes me even more and wants to spend more time together This is totally not good. >will never escape her at this rate Goddamnit 90 KB JPG View Thread

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Anon belongs to fucking jail | /r/Greentext


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Anon has a crush | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/21/18(Sun)21:38:19 No.782947121 ALL I FEEL IS RAGE /b/ I really f------ hate myself >be me >in highschool >have a crush on solid 8/10 qt3.14 >been friends with her for a while >walking to class with her in hallway 8 KB JPG >decide to tell her >she starts laughing >hysterically >feelsbadman >tells me that someone told her and she thought it was a joke >"I'm just out of your league anon" >absolutely p----- >guy who told her walks by >punch him harder than captain falcon >he falls down staircase >breaks leg and somehow dislocates shoulder >crush legitimately scared >try to apologize >she becomes afraid of me >mfw
: Anonymous 10/21/18(Sun)21:38:19 No.782947121 ALL I FEEL IS RAGE /b/ I really f------ hate myself >be me >in highschool >have a crush on solid 8/10 qt3.14 >been friends with her for a while >walking to class with her in hallway 8 KB JPG >decide to tell her >she starts laughing >hysterically >feelsbadman >tells me that someone told her and she thought it was a joke >"I'm just out of your league anon" >absolutely p----- >guy who told her walks by >punch him harder than captain falcon >he falls down staircase >breaks leg and somehow dislocates shoulder >crush legitimately scared >try to apologize >she becomes afraid of me >mfw

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Some say OP is still trapped there | /r/Greentext


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Anon was scared of 4Chan | /r/Greentext


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Anon gets asked a question. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/18/18(Thu)19:35:14 No.48765262 >at bar >about to leave because I'm pretty tired >guy comes up to me and says: "are you into Asian girls?" >Think it's a weird conversation 146 KB PNG starter so he's either a pimp or a weirdo, either way don't want to engage in conversation, just want to go home. >Blow him off by saying: "I'm leaving right now dude" >He says "ok" and goes up to a group of people including an Asian girl. >As I'm leaving see him talk to them and the girl starts looking upset >mfw realise the girl had sent her friend over to see if I was interested in her. He should have just said it instead of being vague, doesn't he know how autistic I am?
: Anonymous 10/18/18(Thu)19:35:14 No.48765262 >at bar >about to leave because I'm pretty tired >guy comes up to me and says: "are you into Asian girls?" >Think it's a weird conversation 146 KB PNG starter so he's either a pimp or a weirdo, either way don't want to engage in conversation, just want to go home. >Blow him off by saying: "I'm leaving right now dude" >He says "ok" and goes up to a group of people including an Asian girl. >As I'm leaving see him talk to them and the girl starts looking upset >mfw realise the girl had sent her friend over to see if I was interested in her. He should have just said it instead of being vague, doesn't he know how autistic I am?

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Femanon laughs too hard | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 49145000 19 min. ago >be me >24yo femanon >meet guy on tinder >he's super cute >possiblebf.jpeg >we go for a romantic stroll along the canal >drinking cans of strong cider >he tells a hilarious joke >i piss myself >ohfuck.mp3 >think quickly >jump into the canal before he can see >"come on in! the water's great" >water is actually freezing >mfw he thinks i'm fun and spontaneous and didn't just get soaked to cover the piss 23.9 kB PNG
Anonymous | 49145000 19 min. ago >be me >24yo femanon >meet guy on tinder >he's super cute >possiblebf.jpeg >we go for a romantic stroll along the canal >drinking cans of strong cider >he tells a hilarious joke >i piss myself >ohfuck.mp3 >think quickly >jump into the canal before he can see >"come on in! the water's great" >water is actually freezing >mfw he thinks i'm fun and spontaneous and didn't just get soaked to cover the piss 23.9 kB PNG

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This might actually work | /r/Greentext

Operation: Destroy O reddit unnamed.png 18 KB PNG >https://www.protocol.com/bulletins/reddit-march-ipo >reddit is going public with an expected $15B valuation This is the perfect opportunity for a troll campaign that could destroy Reddit. The operation is very simple: We encourage Reddit moderators (who are unpaid) to unionize and demand wages from Reddit admins, and to shut down their subreddits until they are paid fairly. Reddit is absolutely full of leftwing Marxist types who hate big business and who love unions. If we do this we could literally see hundreds of leftwing mods on the site start shutting down every part of the website. Admins could ban the mods who do this but then guess what? The site would become completely unusable without mods, since the whole thing relies on free labor from no-life losers to keep things running. >why do this Because f--- Reddit. Convincing the leftwing mods to destroy their own site would be hilarious. : Anonymous (ID: yMYpgsxZ )E 01/08/22(Sat)17:37:07 No.355549171 Bump for potential Anonymous (ID: O lub 4CvOG
Operation: Destroy O reddit unnamed.png 18 KB PNG >https://www.protocol.com/bulletins/reddit-march-ipo >reddit is going public with an expected $15B valuation This is the perfect opportunity for a troll campaign that could destroy Reddit. The operation is very simple: We encourage Reddit moderators (who are unpaid) to unionize and demand wages from Reddit admins, and to shut down their subreddits until they are paid fairly. Reddit is absolutely full of leftwing Marxist types who hate big business and who love unions. If we do this we could literally see hundreds of leftwing mods on the site start shutting down every part of the website. Admins could ban the mods who do this but then guess what? The site would become completely unusable without mods, since the whole thing relies on free labor from no-life losers to keep things running. >why do this Because f--- Reddit. Convincing the leftwing mods to destroy their own site would be hilarious. : Anonymous (ID: yMYpgsxZ )E 01/08/22(Sat)17:37:07 No.355549171 Bump for potential Anonymous (ID: O lub 4CvOG

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Anon is mentally challenged | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/17/22(Mon)18:11:42 No.870858186 I got a good one for y'all >be me >4th grade >new class so we're all introducing ourselves >Teacher says to think up an 16 KB PNG adjective that describes us and starts with the first letter of our name >hear my classmates think of stuff like "Strong Shawn" and "Kind Kelly" >can't think of anything >imfreakingout.png >it's my turn now >now or never >"uh..r-r-retarded richard" >whole class laughs >teachers gets mad and sends me to the principal >suspended for a week for ableist language >mfw when i return and the whole class likes me Being a retard has it's perks
: Anonymous 01/17/22(Mon)18:11:42 No.870858186 I got a good one for y'all >be me >4th grade >new class so we're all introducing ourselves >Teacher says to think up an 16 KB PNG adjective that describes us and starts with the first letter of our name >hear my classmates think of stuff like "Strong Shawn" and "Kind Kelly" >can't think of anything >imfreakingout.png >it's my turn now >now or never >"uh..r-r-retarded richard" >whole class laughs >teachers gets mad and sends me to the principal >suspended for a week for ableist language >mfw when i return and the whole class likes me Being a retard has it's perks

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Anon something something 1984 something muh rights | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: IP4U8N1W)[ 10/05/21(Tue)09:10:37 No.342225864 MAKE AE GREAT AGA maga vax.png 435 KB PNG >*cough *cough >"o-okay, please give me the vaccine now. W-what do you mean it doesn't work that way? Please, I have a wife and ki- >BEEEEEEP
: Anonymous (ID: IP4U8N1W)[ 10/05/21(Tue)09:10:37 No.342225864 MAKE AE GREAT AGA maga vax.png 435 KB PNG >*cough *cough >"o-okay, please give me the vaccine now. W-what do you mean it doesn't work that way? Please, I have a wife and ki- >BEEEEEEP

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Anon is Colombian | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/17/22(Mon)16:47:34 No.870854102 >>870852873 Kek This is how I stopped being a virgin >be me 2018 >Being a Colombian incel >l'm white and I look like a normal Anglo >No woman wants to f--- with me >ldea >l create an account on Tinder >In the description I put that I come from England and I wanted to have sex with bad bitches >l receive hundreds of matches >They are all 10/10, from white to blacks >l have where to choose >I choose a natural redhead with huge t--- >We get together and I talk to him in broken Spanish with a murica accent kek >l'm nervous as s--- but everything works out >we have sex >Wait a minute of sex and e-------- >She kicked me out of her house >lt was worth it I spent almost 5 months doing the same thing, they were the best months of my life But I stopped doing it when I almost got kidnapped
Anonymous 01/17/22(Mon)16:47:34 No.870854102 >>870852873 Kek This is how I stopped being a virgin >be me 2018 >Being a Colombian incel >l'm white and I look like a normal Anglo >No woman wants to f--- with me >ldea >l create an account on Tinder >In the description I put that I come from England and I wanted to have sex with bad bitches >l receive hundreds of matches >They are all 10/10, from white to blacks >l have where to choose >I choose a natural redhead with huge t--- >We get together and I talk to him in broken Spanish with a murica accent kek >l'm nervous as s--- but everything works out >we have sex >Wait a minute of sex and e-------- >She kicked me out of her house >lt was worth it I spent almost 5 months doing the same thing, they were the best months of my life But I stopped doing it when I almost got kidnapped

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Anon takes the BillPill | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/23/21(Sun)16:30:43 No.8551462 >be me >just got COVID vaccine >have sudden urge to purchase Microsoft Office™ available now for only $69.99 per year 5 KB JPG
: Anonymous 05/23/21(Sun)16:30:43 No.8551462 >be me >just got COVID vaccine >have sudden urge to purchase Microsoft Office™ available now for only $69.99 per year 5 KB JPG

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