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Anon hires an Indian | /r/Greentext

>be me >taking electrical engineering technology classes at community college >most classes are easy >need to take a CAD class to graduate >hear that the instructor is a real POS. Enforces strict drawing standards in a chickenshit 100-level class >other students tell me I need to take it at a different school >advisor tells me my GPA is high enough that I can just get a C in it. >believe him like a dumb f---. First week assignment is just setup. Get 100 >Census date passes. >first real assignment >gives me a 60 because I didn't lock the viewport (I learned CAD using BRL-CAD back in the day, where you don't need to lock the viewport) >second real assignment >look up AutoCAD gigs on Fiverr >Pay Indian $20 to do the needful >Give him the drawing standards. Make sure all evidence that it's from my school is gone >gets it back to me in a day. Looks good. >have brother who is engineer look it over and confirm it's right >restore seal of school and labels indicating it was from my school and turn it in >get 100. >says drawing is great >this guy is a notorious perfectionist >has all the assignments already up for the entire semester >Calculate that it's going to cost me $400 for Poojeet to take this class >have plenty of money because NEET with savings tldr I'm outsourcing my AutoCAD assignments to Indians. >mfw some Poojeet is saving me hours of time and stress
>be me >taking electrical engineering technology classes at community college >most classes are easy >need to take a CAD class to graduate >hear that the instructor is a real POS. Enforces strict drawing standards in a chickenshit 100-level class >other students tell me I need to take it at a different school >advisor tells me my GPA is high enough that I can just get a C in it. >believe him like a dumb f---. First week assignment is just setup. Get 100 >Census date passes. >first real assignment >gives me a 60 because I didn't lock the viewport (I learned CAD using BRL-CAD back in the day, where you don't need to lock the viewport) >second real assignment >look up AutoCAD gigs on Fiverr >Pay Indian $20 to do the needful >Give him the drawing standards. Make sure all evidence that it's from my school is gone >gets it back to me in a day. Looks good. >have brother who is engineer look it over and confirm it's right >restore seal of school and labels indicating it was from my school and turn it in >get 100. >says drawing is great >this guy is a notorious perfectionist >has all the assignments already up for the entire semester >Calculate that it's going to cost me $400 for Poojeet to take this class >have plenty of money because NEET with savings tldr I'm outsourcing my AutoCAD assignments to Indians. >mfw some Poojeet is saving me hours of time and stress

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pdf file detected | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/28/21(Tue)22:25:21 No.869489454 >turned on "screen always on while charging" on my phone a few months ago for some reason >set new lock screen last night >mom comes to my apartment to bring me food while im half asleep >she sees my lock screen, a 9 year old 627 KB JPG girl >havent heard from her since how the f--- do i play this off
: Anonymous 12/28/21(Tue)22:25:21 No.869489454 >turned on "screen always on while charging" on my phone a few months ago for some reason >set new lock screen last night >mom comes to my apartment to bring me food while im half asleep >she sees my lock screen, a 9 year old 627 KB JPG girl >havent heard from her since how the f--- do i play this off

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Anon drinks from the Holy Grail | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/24/22(Mon)01:07:30 No.67120343 >get covid >getting worse over 2 week period >come to terms with my death >decide to crack open my gamer GanierGirt Pee 19.999.00 ame bee girl pee and take a sip, because why not >sense of smell and taste come 34 KB JPG back within minutes >gulp down the whole bottle >feel super tired, fall asleep >wake up, 100% cured holy heck
: Anonymous 01/24/22(Mon)01:07:30 No.67120343 >get covid >getting worse over 2 week period >come to terms with my death >decide to crack open my gamer GanierGirt Pee 19.999.00 ame bee girl pee and take a sip, because why not >sense of smell and taste come 34 KB JPG back within minutes >gulp down the whole bottle >feel super tired, fall asleep >wake up, 100% cured holy heck

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Anon’s family is healthy | /r/Greentext


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anon works in america | /r/Greentext


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Anon makes a Mii | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/08/19(Fri)18:00:31 No.50863999 > be me > be mii pic related 160 KB PNG
: Anonymous 02/08/19(Fri)18:00:31 No.50863999 > be me > be mii pic related 160 KB PNG

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Anon is optimistically hopeless | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/04/17(Tue)09:52:59 No.38148964 >it'll get better in high school >it'll get better in college >it'l' get better in university >it will get better when i have a job >ive wasted my entire f------ life, my youth is gone ive missed out 142 KB PNG on love and any important milestones in a normal persons life View Thread
: Anonymous 07/04/17(Tue)09:52:59 No.38148964 >it'll get better in high school >it'll get better in college >it'l' get better in university >it will get better when i have a job >ive wasted my entire f------ life, my youth is gone ive missed out 142 KB PNG on love and any important milestones in a normal persons life View Thread

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Anon's crush is crushed by black susan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/04/18(Tue)07:22:58 No.786522740 >be me >high school >algebra >crush comes in to give teacher раpers 53 КВ ЈPG >say hi >no response >say hi again >ghetto black girl screams "SHE DON'T WANT YOU N----" >entire class laughs >crush blushes and runs out the door >teachers begin to chuckle >mfw
: Anonymous 12/04/18(Tue)07:22:58 No.786522740 >be me >high school >algebra >crush comes in to give teacher раpers 53 КВ ЈPG >say hi >no response >say hi again >ghetto black girl screams "SHE DON'T WANT YOU N----" >entire class laughs >crush blushes and runs out the door >teachers begin to chuckle >mfw

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anon gives motivation | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)03:00:24 No.871217501 Good morning anon. Make sure to eat some breakfast so you'll have energy today. Don't work to hard your health is important. 36 KB JPG I love you 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)03:02:28 No.871217574 >>871217501 (OP) # f-----
: Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)03:00:24 No.871217501 Good morning anon. Make sure to eat some breakfast so you'll have energy today. Don't work to hard your health is important. 36 KB JPG I love you 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)03:02:28 No.871217574 >>871217501 (OP) # f-----

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Anon has a Star Wars Theory | /r/Greentext

>Han Solo and Princess Leia were definitely f------ on the Millennium Falcon when they were traveling from the asteroid fields to Cloud City >Online blueprints make it clear that the Millennium Falcon wasn't very large, didn't have much privacy 98 KB JPG >Online sources say the trip took around 5 weeks >Was that weird for Chewbacca? >I don't think so. Han was definitely a Chad >Chewie was probably used to Han pounding random space Stacies. He probably just hung out in the cockpit and pretended he didn't hear it.
>Han Solo and Princess Leia were definitely f------ on the Millennium Falcon when they were traveling from the asteroid fields to Cloud City >Online blueprints make it clear that the Millennium Falcon wasn't very large, didn't have much privacy 98 KB JPG >Online sources say the trip took around 5 weeks >Was that weird for Chewbacca? >I don't think so. Han was definitely a Chad >Chewie was probably used to Han pounding random space Stacies. He probably just hung out in the cockpit and pretended he didn't hear it.

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This is a test | /r/Greentext

sandmandaddy69 Follow <opinion> opinion> <opinion> vopinic <opinion> kabrOnex Follow This is literally 4chan for the past decade mr-system-of-a-downer Follow spy vs spy 2,196 notes
sandmandaddy69 Follow <opinion> opinion> <opinion> vopinic <opinion> kabrOnex Follow This is literally 4chan for the past decade mr-system-of-a-downer Follow spy vs spy 2,196 notes

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Anon loves hollywood remakes. | /r/Greentext


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Anon is born in Norway | /r/Greentext

>Be me. Born in Norway >My name is Sven. I am 6 foot 4, and ľm in great shape >Parents upper middle class. Get full advantage of Norwegian life >My erect penis points all the way to the right and is curved towards my body. 72 KB JPG >It looks like a Jew's nose. >MFW I had one shot at life, and I got a weird penis. | Pic related
>Be me. Born in Norway >My name is Sven. I am 6 foot 4, and ľm in great shape >Parents upper middle class. Get full advantage of Norwegian life >My erect penis points all the way to the right and is curved towards my body. 72 KB JPG >It looks like a Jew's nose. >MFW I had one shot at life, and I got a weird penis. | Pic related

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Brit visits America | /r/Greentext


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Anon gets herpes | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)10:41:09 No.25719261 >be me no confidence and chubby and never had a gf >work super hard on my body and mind >meet a cute and funny girl >despite having no experience and acting like social outcast i conquer 9 KB JPG her heart >ask her on a date >we kiss for the first time >2 days ago my upper lip feels weird >today i see some herpes on my lip How f----- am i ?I asked her if she had herpes on her mouth she told me she got it as a kid w-- ? : Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)10:45:22 No.25719277 >>25719261 (OP) # It will go away don't worry.
: Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)10:41:09 No.25719261 >be me no confidence and chubby and never had a gf >work super hard on my body and mind >meet a cute and funny girl >despite having no experience and acting like social outcast i conquer 9 KB JPG her heart >ask her on a date >we kiss for the first time >2 days ago my upper lip feels weird >today i see some herpes on my lip How f----- am i ?I asked her if she had herpes on her mouth she told me she got it as a kid w-- ? : Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)10:45:22 No.25719277 >>25719261 (OP) # It will go away don't worry.

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Anon needs medicine | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/02/17(Wed)13:48:25 No.19385128 Weirdest sleep paralysis story? I'l start >Wake up looking at ceiling >Can't move >Grudge looking ass baby comes 7 KB JPG in >Starts dancing on my chest >Utters these exact words "I MAY BE DEAD, BUT AT LEAST I HAVE DENTAL INSURANCE!" >Start laughing >He laughs with me >Kisses me on my nose "See ya again, buttercup!! >Wake up with my pants covered with semen
: Anonymous 08/02/17(Wed)13:48:25 No.19385128 Weirdest sleep paralysis story? I'l start >Wake up looking at ceiling >Can't move >Grudge looking ass baby comes 7 KB JPG in >Starts dancing on my chest >Utters these exact words "I MAY BE DEAD, BUT AT LEAST I HAVE DENTAL INSURANCE!" >Start laughing >He laughs with me >Kisses me on my nose "See ya again, buttercup!! >Wake up with my pants covered with semen

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Anon is horny. | /r/Greentext

What's your most shameful fap? It can be your most cringe-worthy fap or a fap that showed you the depths of your deviancy. 32 KB JPG Cringe-worthy: >Probably about 14 or 15 years old >Have f------ dial-up internet (rural-f-- here) >Family goes to bed >Try to connect to interwebs >Connection fails repeatedly >Get hornier by the second >Get an idea >Open a program called "Pivot StickFigure Animator" (lets you make little stop-motion movies) >Make a stick figure with a big-ol' dong >Make a stick figure with long hair and t------ >Go through painful task of animating them engaged in foreplay >StickLady blows StickDude >I c-- >Delete my movie >Shutdown PC >Go to bed >Mind represses this memory for about 12 years >Memory floods back after I finish f------ my fiance >Laugh for a goddamned hour
What's your most shameful fap? It can be your most cringe-worthy fap or a fap that showed you the depths of your deviancy. 32 KB JPG Cringe-worthy: >Probably about 14 or 15 years old >Have f------ dial-up internet (rural-f-- here) >Family goes to bed >Try to connect to interwebs >Connection fails repeatedly >Get hornier by the second >Get an idea >Open a program called "Pivot StickFigure Animator" (lets you make little stop-motion movies) >Make a stick figure with a big-ol' dong >Make a stick figure with long hair and t------ >Go through painful task of animating them engaged in foreplay >StickLady blows StickDude >I c-- >Delete my movie >Shutdown PC >Go to bed >Mind represses this memory for about 12 years >Memory floods back after I finish f------ my fiance >Laugh for a goddamned hour

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Anon is evil | /r/Greentext

>Call my local bowling alley >"Do you have 30 lb balls? I can't really lift/throw anything heavier." >"Yes we do have 30 lb balls." >"THEN HOW DO YOU WALK!?!" >Hang up the phone 318.2 kB JPG НАНАНАНАНАНАНАНА
>Call my local bowling alley >"Do you have 30 lb balls? I can't really lift/throw anything heavier." >"Yes we do have 30 lb balls." >"THEN HOW DO YOU WALK!?!" >Hang up the phone 318.2 kB JPG НАНАНАНАНАНАНАНА

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Anon is disturbed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)13:41:50 No.871235498 >be me >sitting in restaurant eating sandwich >look over at Puerto Rican looking guy across the way >he ordered a baked potato >proceeds to tear into the f------ thing like a velociraptor eviscerating a poodle, or a hunk of bread >no knife and fork, or napkin, in f------ sight >Captain Caveman eats the entire thing skin and all >soon there is nothing left that would ever indicate there had ever been a baked potato, the neanderthal literally ate the entire potato out of existence I'm deeply disturbed. What the f---? Who eats a baked 15 KB JPG potato like this?
: Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)13:41:50 No.871235498 >be me >sitting in restaurant eating sandwich >look over at Puerto Rican looking guy across the way >he ordered a baked potato >proceeds to tear into the f------ thing like a velociraptor eviscerating a poodle, or a hunk of bread >no knife and fork, or napkin, in f------ sight >Captain Caveman eats the entire thing skin and all >soon there is nothing left that would ever indicate there had ever been a baked potato, the neanderthal literally ate the entire potato out of existence I'm deeply disturbed. What the f---? Who eats a baked 15 KB JPG potato like this?

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Anon had a reddit account | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)11:07:19 No.871236751 C7dT5q0X4AAeajJ.jpg 65 KB JPG >be me yesterday >Reddit account is 2 years old, 300000 karma >Hundreds of high quality memes, interesting discussions, game dev posts, etc >post ONE shitpost making fun of trannies >account permanently banned Rest In Peace, old reddit account. I loved you.
: Anonymous 01/23/22(Sun)11:07:19 No.871236751 C7dT5q0X4AAeajJ.jpg 65 KB JPG >be me yesterday >Reddit account is 2 years old, 300000 karma >Hundreds of high quality memes, interesting discussions, game dev posts, etc >post ONE shitpost making fun of trannies >account permanently banned Rest In Peace, old reddit account. I loved you.

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