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Anon makes a noise complaint | /r/Greentext

File: yeet. jpg (8 KB, 317x282) O Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)15:08:50 No.871831194 >live in cheap-ass apartment with thin as f--- walls >don't mind, I am a mild-mannered and quiet man and don't even play music >unfortunately neighbours' bed is right next to the wall, and they f--- like 6-8 times per week >too awkward to complain >get better idea >dig out my stereo that I never use, and be prepared >select the best possible song >wait >hear neighbours start to f--- again I LIKE TO MOVE-IT MOVE-IT, I LIKE TO MOVE-IT-MOVE IT >they stop >l stop >we wait >they start again I LIKE TO MOVE-IT MOVE-IT >they stop >this repeats >start doing this every time, always have the song prepared and stereo charged >this goes on for weeks >they're silent for a whole three weeks >I hear them start again I LIKE TO - MOVE IT! >they stop immediately and don't start again >they haven't f----- for 3 months now
File: yeet. jpg (8 KB, 317x282) O Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)15:08:50 No.871831194 >live in cheap-ass apartment with thin as f--- walls >don't mind, I am a mild-mannered and quiet man and don't even play music >unfortunately neighbours' bed is right next to the wall, and they f--- like 6-8 times per week >too awkward to complain >get better idea >dig out my stereo that I never use, and be prepared >select the best possible song >wait >hear neighbours start to f--- again I LIKE TO MOVE-IT MOVE-IT, I LIKE TO MOVE-IT-MOVE IT >they stop >l stop >we wait >they start again I LIKE TO MOVE-IT MOVE-IT >they stop >this repeats >start doing this every time, always have the song prepared and stereo charged >this goes on for weeks >they're silent for a whole three weeks >I hear them start again I LIKE TO - MOVE IT! >they stop immediately and don't start again >they haven't f----- for 3 months now

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Anon is 15 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/20/17(Tue)06:13:17 No.37835076 ITT: Post lyrics that hit you hard. >l've spent days trying to decide >Which knives I should use 62 KB JPG to lobotomize >The rotting tumors inside my brain >They're always whispering, "You're not okay." : Anonymous 06/20/17(Tue)06:14:27 No.37835096 >>37835076 (OP) # what an emo little f----- you are
: Anonymous 06/20/17(Tue)06:13:17 No.37835076 ITT: Post lyrics that hit you hard. >l've spent days trying to decide >Which knives I should use 62 KB JPG to lobotomize >The rotting tumors inside my brain >They're always whispering, "You're not okay." : Anonymous 06/20/17(Tue)06:14:27 No.37835096 >>37835076 (OP) # what an emo little f----- you are

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It's Disgustig | /r/Greentext

>be me >quick fap >c-- into toilet >flush >down goes c-- >into sewers 14 KB JPG >into water purification plants >into drinking water >mfw l've been drinking billions of people's c-- >mfw I'm now a giga f----- nonymous 10/02/18(Tue)23:00:07 No.48464586 [Reply) D
>be me >quick fap >c-- into toilet >flush >down goes c-- >into sewers 14 KB JPG >into water purification plants >into drinking water >mfw l've been drinking billions of people's c-- >mfw I'm now a giga f----- nonymous 10/02/18(Tue)23:00:07 No.48464586 [Reply) D

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Anon lives in Ukraine | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/09/21(Sun)14:28:35 No.854002332 >Be me >playing video games on Sunday night >comfy as hell >very invested in game >See a light coming through my 51 KB JPG window. >"Oh s---, I stayed up all night playing video games!" >panicking as I think about another exhausting day at work. >look out window >turns out that it's just the mushroom cloud from a nuclear warhead >crisisaverted.exe
: Anonymous 05/09/21(Sun)14:28:35 No.854002332 >Be me >playing video games on Sunday night >comfy as hell >very invested in game >See a light coming through my 51 KB JPG window. >"Oh s---, I stayed up all night playing video games!" >panicking as I think about another exhausting day at work. >look out window >turns out that it's just the mushroom cloud from a nuclear warhead >crisisaverted.exe

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Anon meets the KKK | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/15/18(Thu)21:12:21 No.784990996 >be me >18 >get invited to KKK rally by friend because his uncle was in it and he wanted to see what it was about but didn't want to go alone >get to the house with the rally 10 KB JPG >go out back >like 20 guys all having a BBQ and eating hot dogs wut.gif >sit down and talk to this like 75 year old guy >he tells me about the old days when they where in power and when they were respected >start listen to speech by guy in a robe that looked like pic related >pretty cool evening >leave and say goodbye guys I dont support the kkk or anything but those guys were pretty cool and make great hotdogs
: Anonymous 11/15/18(Thu)21:12:21 No.784990996 >be me >18 >get invited to KKK rally by friend because his uncle was in it and he wanted to see what it was about but didn't want to go alone >get to the house with the rally 10 KB JPG >go out back >like 20 guys all having a BBQ and eating hot dogs wut.gif >sit down and talk to this like 75 year old guy >he tells me about the old days when they where in power and when they were respected >start listen to speech by guy in a robe that looked like pic related >pretty cool evening >leave and say goodbye guys I dont support the kkk or anything but those guys were pretty cool and make great hotdogs

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Anon questions americans | /r/Greentext

File: 14a.png (216 KB, 340x463) O Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)10:09:21 No. 159054349 2>159054425 >decide to visit usa >go to dentist >dentist checks teeth, gives some advice and asks questions >starts to get sharp tools to clean teeth >constantly feel sharp pain in gums >start to taste blood >dentist says s--- like "you have some bloody gums" >finish cleaning >dentist talks about taking care of gums etc. >go back to poland >go to dentist >dentist inspects teeth and asks questions, gives advice, etc. >dentist gets sharp tools and starts cleaning >feel zero pain in gums >finish cleaning >no blood at all >dentist gives advice, etc. >leave do american dentists purposely stab gums? Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)10:11:50 No.159054425 >>159054349 (OP) >do american dentists purposely stab gums? I'm convinced they do desu
File: 14a.png (216 KB, 340x463) O Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)10:09:21 No. 159054349 2>159054425 >decide to visit usa >go to dentist >dentist checks teeth, gives some advice and asks questions >starts to get sharp tools to clean teeth >constantly feel sharp pain in gums >start to taste blood >dentist says s--- like "you have some bloody gums" >finish cleaning >dentist talks about taking care of gums etc. >go back to poland >go to dentist >dentist inspects teeth and asks questions, gives advice, etc. >dentist gets sharp tools and starts cleaning >feel zero pain in gums >finish cleaning >no blood at all >dentist gives advice, etc. >leave do american dentists purposely stab gums? Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)10:11:50 No.159054425 >>159054349 (OP) >do american dentists purposely stab gums? I'm convinced they do desu

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Anon gets nether warts | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)07:06:08 No.871816449 >Be me age 18, straight dude but super horny >go to adult bookstore with video booths >as I'm walking to a booth, a guy asks if he can lick my a------ >l'm like "yea, go for it dude" >seems less gay because I don't have to look at him while I j------- to the video >he goes to town on my ass and eats it >i c-- really hard, pull up my pants, and walk out without a word 2 weeks later >My a------ is covered in warts. m------------ gave me a--- warts with his mouth
: Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)07:06:08 No.871816449 >Be me age 18, straight dude but super horny >go to adult bookstore with video booths >as I'm walking to a booth, a guy asks if he can lick my a------ >l'm like "yea, go for it dude" >seems less gay because I don't have to look at him while I j------- to the video >he goes to town on my ass and eats it >i c-- really hard, pull up my pants, and walk out without a word 2 weeks later >My a------ is covered in warts. m------------ gave me a--- warts with his mouth

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Anon listens to AC/DC | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/11/18(Sun)21:24:32 No.83967864 >Dad heard me listening to AC/Dc >He's banging on the door while singing the lyrics
Anonymous 11/11/18(Sun)21:24:32 No.83967864 >Dad heard me listening to AC/Dc >He's banging on the door while singing the lyrics

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Anon is a girl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/18/18(Sun)06:11:17 No.785181182 >ok looking girl >play online games and make friends >guys constantly protecting me in game cuz l'm a gamer girl >username is LOVE 8 KB JPG >men always calling me love and making sure l'm protected in game >befriend one, voice doesn't sound too bad >exchange pictures >literally the ugliest person Il've ever seen What to do?
: Anonymous 11/18/18(Sun)06:11:17 No.785181182 >ok looking girl >play online games and make friends >guys constantly protecting me in game cuz l'm a gamer girl >username is LOVE 8 KB JPG >men always calling me love and making sure l'm protected in game >befriend one, voice doesn't sound too bad >exchange pictures >literally the ugliest person Il've ever seen What to do?

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Femanon likes Jolyne | /r/Greentext

01/31/22(Mon)20:32:12 No.14400855 >Be me > Depressed, overweight femanon > No social life > Start reading Jojo > Get to part 6 > Se Jolyne > Guess I'm bisexual now 10 KB JPG > Relate to her personality and background > Want to be like her > Start working out and eating healthy and worrying about appearance > make friends at the gym, meet boyfriend > Not quite there yet but lose a bunch of weight > Am happier now > Thanks Jolyne
01/31/22(Mon)20:32:12 No.14400855 >Be me > Depressed, overweight femanon > No social life > Start reading Jojo > Get to part 6 > Se Jolyne > Guess I'm bisexual now 10 KB JPG > Relate to her personality and background > Want to be like her > Start working out and eating healthy and worrying about appearance > make friends at the gym, meet boyfriend > Not quite there yet but lose a bunch of weight > Am happier now > Thanks Jolyne

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Anon doesn’t read. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/26/18(Mon)09:19:38 No.49505883 >have somewhat stable social circle in uni >get along with this one grill >she gives me a book for christmas that she thinks I would 82 KB JPG like >for some reason never open it >weeks go by, she keeps asking about the book >quickly look up plot summary on wiki so that I can pretend l'm reading it >she's visibly annoyed and angry, says "you probably never even opened it" >insist that I read it, our relationship slowly deteriorates >we get our degrees and don't stay in touch >fast forward six years >find book while cleaning my apartment >decide to read it >find a little romantic note inside about how much I mean to her etc >mfw book is pretty boring
: Anonymous 11/26/18(Mon)09:19:38 No.49505883 >have somewhat stable social circle in uni >get along with this one grill >she gives me a book for christmas that she thinks I would 82 KB JPG like >for some reason never open it >weeks go by, she keeps asking about the book >quickly look up plot summary on wiki so that I can pretend l'm reading it >she's visibly annoyed and angry, says "you probably never even opened it" >insist that I read it, our relationship slowly deteriorates >we get our degrees and don't stay in touch >fast forward six years >find book while cleaning my apartment >decide to read it >find a little romantic note inside about how much I mean to her etc >mfw book is pretty boring

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Anon hatches a plan | /r/Greentext

848.png 167 KB PNG > I have an idea to bring down the entire NFT market >or deflate it at least >we take all the expensive NFTS >screenshot them, crop them and put them into photoshop >change something small to make them "unique" >keep editing small details and dump them over and over again on the market at a ridiculously low price >make the originals dump down in price massively when holders see how common it is and how easy it is to make these NFTS >or profit immensely off of retards >we cannot loose >who's with me?
848.png 167 KB PNG > I have an idea to bring down the entire NFT market >or deflate it at least >we take all the expensive NFTS >screenshot them, crop them and put them into photoshop >change something small to make them "unique" >keep editing small details and dump them over and over again on the market at a ridiculously low price >make the originals dump down in price massively when holders see how common it is and how easy it is to make these NFTS >or profit immensely off of retards >we cannot loose >who's with me?

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Anon practicing small talk | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/30/21(Wed)13:41:38 No.64377723 >walking to convenience store to buy snacks >see random girl, about my age with a nirvana shirt on >me: "hey whats your favorite nirvana song?" 8 KB JPG >her: "i dont know" >me: "but youre wearing the shirt" >her: "please stop" >me: "what?" >her: "youre being creepy" >me: "define creepy" >her: "no... just leave me alone please"
: Anonymous 06/30/21(Wed)13:41:38 No.64377723 >walking to convenience store to buy snacks >see random girl, about my age with a nirvana shirt on >me: "hey whats your favorite nirvana song?" 8 KB JPG >her: "i dont know" >me: "but youre wearing the shirt" >her: "please stop" >me: "what?" >her: "youre being creepy" >me: "define creepy" >her: "no... just leave me alone please"

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Anon playing both sides | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)01:01:21 No.67232409 >get paid $9.00 an hour and get free tendies working at mcdonalds le capitalist oppression >work for free moderating a bunch of leftoid reddit subs 10 hours a day fighting le revolution 31 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)01:01:21 No.67232409 >get paid $9.00 an hour and get free tendies working at mcdonalds le capitalist oppression >work for free moderating a bunch of leftoid reddit subs 10 hours a day fighting le revolution 31 KB JPG

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Anon has a torture fetish | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/31/18(Wed)06:59:46 No.49017697 >constantly hoping that someone does something to me that warrants me brutally murdering them >constantly have visions of beating people's head in to bloody pulps 96 KB JPG >riding my push bike >some idiot yells at me from a car >imagine myself torturing his whole family what is wrong with me
: Anonymous 10/31/18(Wed)06:59:46 No.49017697 >constantly hoping that someone does something to me that warrants me brutally murdering them >constantly have visions of beating people's head in to bloody pulps 96 KB JPG >riding my push bike >some idiot yells at me from a car >imagine myself torturing his whole family what is wrong with me

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Anon makes pillow talk | /r/Greentext

>Be me, 19 year old anon in college. >Meet cute girl in class. >We start to hang out >All the same interests, like all the same stuff >lt turns into flirting >We start making out in my dorm room, 8 KB PNG we are getting naked, fooling around >She says something that's supposed to be romantic about how it's like we were made for each other >l go full retard and say we are probably secret half siblings >She gets quiet, says what do you mean? >Like we secretly have the same dad, and that's why we are so perfect for each other >She gets real quiet and says she has to go >It's been two days >Did I make a mistake?
>Be me, 19 year old anon in college. >Meet cute girl in class. >We start to hang out >All the same interests, like all the same stuff >lt turns into flirting >We start making out in my dorm room, 8 KB PNG we are getting naked, fooling around >She says something that's supposed to be romantic about how it's like we were made for each other >l go full retard and say we are probably secret half siblings >She gets quiet, says what do you mean? >Like we secretly have the same dad, and that's why we are so perfect for each other >She gets real quiet and says she has to go >It's been two days >Did I make a mistake?

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Bussy addiction | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/31/22(Mon)10:22:21 No.67223459 >feel confident that i'm straight and all that f----- s--- in the past was just memes and p--- addiction >accidentally fap to bussy again damn it 31 KB JPG
: Anonymous 01/31/22(Mon)10:22:21 No.67223459 >feel confident that i'm straight and all that f----- s--- in the past was just memes and p--- addiction >accidentally fap to bussy again damn it 31 KB JPG

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Anon takes the self improvement pill | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: zrlaToSX ) Self improvement is a retarded(...) 01/31/22(Mon)09:32:27 No.359021086 >millenial >no friends no gf >decide to "self improve" >get a job, start doing sports, take up a hobby >stop p--- and fapping altogether >stop drinking 165 KB JPG >start going to church >start seeing a shrink >do this for three years >still feel unhappy, depressed, mentally ill (condition worsened) and worse than when I was 24/7 on my computer The truth is that if you are f----- in the head in some way or the other you are NOT gonna make it. No matter how much you try / LARP
: Anonymous (ID: zrlaToSX ) Self improvement is a retarded(...) 01/31/22(Mon)09:32:27 No.359021086 >millenial >no friends no gf >decide to "self improve" >get a job, start doing sports, take up a hobby >stop p--- and fapping altogether >stop drinking 165 KB JPG >start going to church >start seeing a shrink >do this for three years >still feel unhappy, depressed, mentally ill (condition worsened) and worse than when I was 24/7 on my computer The truth is that if you are f----- in the head in some way or the other you are NOT gonna make it. No matter how much you try / LARP

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Anon has priorities | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/31/22(Mon)15:00:41 No.67230845 >your pharmacist asks you out Holy f---, the same bitch who gives me my xanax and ssris asked me if I wanted to hang out this weekend. We've talked here and there 75 KB JPG whenever I had to go get my meds, and today she finally did it. She's this cute latina girl, is this even legal? Can I sue? : Anonymous 01/31/22(Mon)15:06:00 No.67230909 >>67230845 (OP)# >gets asked out by cute girl >first thought is if he can get money out of it shalom brother! 166 KB JPG
: Anonymous 01/31/22(Mon)15:00:41 No.67230845 >your pharmacist asks you out Holy f---, the same bitch who gives me my xanax and ssris asked me if I wanted to hang out this weekend. We've talked here and there 75 KB JPG whenever I had to go get my meds, and today she finally did it. She's this cute latina girl, is this even legal? Can I sue? : Anonymous 01/31/22(Mon)15:06:00 No.67230909 >>67230845 (OP)# >gets asked out by cute girl >first thought is if he can get money out of it shalom brother! 166 KB JPG

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Anon learns about double standards | /r/Greentext

File: pepe-thinking-1024x1024.jpg (68 KB, 1024x1024) O Anonymous 01/30/22(Sun)17:01:47 No.67216726 >Post some memes on reddit >Make one about white people >Thousands of upvotes >Lots of comments and awards This is easy.avi >Make one about black people >Less than 100 upvotes >Get called rasict >Post removed Hmmm.. interesting. Very interesting.
File: pepe-thinking-1024x1024.jpg (68 KB, 1024x1024) O Anonymous 01/30/22(Sun)17:01:47 No.67216726 >Post some memes on reddit >Make one about white people >Thousands of upvotes >Lots of comments and awards This is easy.avi >Make one about black people >Less than 100 upvotes >Get called rasict >Post removed Hmmm.. interesting. Very interesting.

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