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Anon looks like a Wojack | /r/Greentext

File: 6e330c2ab44a01ef.jpg (647 KB, 3456x2383) O Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)16:09:31 No.65435834 [Reply] >>65436601 Can finasteride help me? 8 replies omitted. Click here to view. Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)17:34:54 No.65436601 File: 7D67E438-5CBE-4748-8158-B(.).png (193 KB, 1545x869) >>65435834 (OP) >pic related
File: 6e330c2ab44a01ef.jpg (647 KB, 3456x2383) O Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)16:09:31 No.65435834 [Reply] >>65436601 Can finasteride help me? 8 replies omitted. Click here to view. Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)17:34:54 No.65436601 File: 7D67E438-5CBE-4748-8158-B(.).png (193 KB, 1545x869) >>65435834 (OP) >pic related

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Anon is sick | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: U0dTroQ 10/11/19(Fri)06:42:29 No.229478329 >be american >get sick >go backrupt 576 KB PNG View Thread
: Anonymous (ID: U0dTroQ 10/11/19(Fri)06:42:29 No.229478329 >be american >get sick >go backrupt 576 KB PNG View Thread

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The World Wide Weeb | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/06/21(Mon)13:17:22 No.16657570 >Place order with Domino's >Look at Pizza Tracker >"Reiko began custom-making your order at XX:XX PM" mfw eating this pizza means l'll also be indirectly licking the fingers ABSOLUTELY KIMOCHI 9 KB JPG of a cute Japanese gril >>16657599 # : Anonymous 09/06/21(Mon)13:23:30 No.16657599 >>16657570 # >he doesn't realise it's also a masculine German name
: Anonymous 09/06/21(Mon)13:17:22 No.16657570 >Place order with Domino's >Look at Pizza Tracker >"Reiko began custom-making your order at XX:XX PM" mfw eating this pizza means l'll also be indirectly licking the fingers ABSOLUTELY KIMOCHI 9 KB JPG of a cute Japanese gril >>16657599 # : Anonymous 09/06/21(Mon)13:23:30 No.16657599 >>16657570 # >he doesn't realise it's also a masculine German name

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Anon gets a GF | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/15/21(Wed)15:04:47 No.66575792 >girl I've been paying $600 a month to be my girlfriend says she's caught feelings for me and has started refusing my money >gave me back $1800 out of the $3000 I've paid so far >says she'll give me back the rest when she gets the money 295 KB PNG >wants to see me more often now What do I do now? Anonymous 12/15/21(Wed)15:07:20 No.66575822 >>66575792 (OP) >What do I do now? enjoy your gf for free?
Anonymous 12/15/21(Wed)15:04:47 No.66575792 >girl I've been paying $600 a month to be my girlfriend says she's caught feelings for me and has started refusing my money >gave me back $1800 out of the $3000 I've paid so far >says she'll give me back the rest when she gets the money 295 KB PNG >wants to see me more often now What do I do now? Anonymous 12/15/21(Wed)15:07:20 No.66575822 >>66575792 (OP) >What do I do now? enjoy your gf for free?

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Anons Dad buys a truck | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: Y8DE0+0A 02/03/18(Sat)20:54:28 No.7275061 >dad buys 2015 Diesel Dodge Ram >6 months later says "I think I'm gonna buy a new truck" >whatthefuck.jpeg >"why you just got a new one' >"I'm gonna buy a 2016. Those diesel Engines last forever" >"then why don't you make your 2015 last forever" 128 KB JPG >says I don't understand vehicles >ffw he's over $70,000 in debt and doesn't understand why Is my dad retarded?
: Anonymous (ID: Y8DE0+0A 02/03/18(Sat)20:54:28 No.7275061 >dad buys 2015 Diesel Dodge Ram >6 months later says "I think I'm gonna buy a new truck" >whatthefuck.jpeg >"why you just got a new one' >"I'm gonna buy a 2016. Those diesel Engines last forever" >"then why don't you make your 2015 last forever" 128 KB JPG >says I don't understand vehicles >ffw he's over $70,000 in debt and doesn't understand why Is my dad retarded?

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The end is near for UK anons | /r/Greentext

:Anonymous 12/24/20(Thu)09:33:41 No.18300540 >The Ottoman Empire decriminalized homosexuality in 1858 >The UK decriminalized homosexuality in 1967 Good Lord Bongland is a special kind of f----- isn't it 166 KB PNG Anonymous 12/24/20(Thu)09:35:53 No.18300556 >>18300540 (OP) # >ottoman empire collapsed 50 years later >UK collapsing now Really makes you think
:Anonymous 12/24/20(Thu)09:33:41 No.18300540 >The Ottoman Empire decriminalized homosexuality in 1858 >The UK decriminalized homosexuality in 1967 Good Lord Bongland is a special kind of f----- isn't it 166 KB PNG Anonymous 12/24/20(Thu)09:35:53 No.18300556 >>18300540 (OP) # >ottoman empire collapsed 50 years later >UK collapsing now Really makes you think

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Anon gets called a misogynist by w*men | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)10:47:56 No.872089971 >gf gets frequent UTIS >gf gets prescribed a heavy UTI antibiotic to take prophylactically >antibiotic makes her feel nauseous and gives her headaches and she has to take it after everytime we have sex >antibiotic also may cause issues 9 KB JPG when pregnant/breastfeeding and can cause kidney damage with long term use >ask her to go talk to her gynecologist during her next appointment >gynecologist pretty much shrugs and says its the only real option >concerned what long-term use of antibiotic will do to her so decided to ask a girl forum if they have similar experiences or advice. >get called a misogynist, and a p------------ for thinking I know better when I'm a man and don't know what it's like and I should shut up because I'm a typical a------ man who thinks he knows better than my gf or her doctor >just care about my girlfriend and wanted some other anecdotal stories >ask again the next day but leave out the part I'm a guy asking for my girlfriend >get actual real advice and similar stories but yes...please tell me more of how men are more toxic than women.
: Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)10:47:56 No.872089971 >gf gets frequent UTIS >gf gets prescribed a heavy UTI antibiotic to take prophylactically >antibiotic makes her feel nauseous and gives her headaches and she has to take it after everytime we have sex >antibiotic also may cause issues 9 KB JPG when pregnant/breastfeeding and can cause kidney damage with long term use >ask her to go talk to her gynecologist during her next appointment >gynecologist pretty much shrugs and says its the only real option >concerned what long-term use of antibiotic will do to her so decided to ask a girl forum if they have similar experiences or advice. >get called a misogynist, and a p------------ for thinking I know better when I'm a man and don't know what it's like and I should shut up because I'm a typical a------ man who thinks he knows better than my gf or her doctor >just care about my girlfriend and wanted some other anecdotal stories >ask again the next day but leave out the part I'm a guy asking for my girlfriend >get actual real advice and similar stories but yes...please tell me more of how men are more toxic than women.

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Anon isn't taken seriously | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)10:38:44 No.872089694 I met a drunk girl at the bar and I went back to her apartment. She was on top and I told her to get off because I was going to c-- and she said "it's fine just do it, c-- inside me" | told her no and to get off but she just rode harder and kept saying "c-- for me" over and over. I tried to get her off me but I couldn't. 48 KB JPG What do I do now? Was I r----? : Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)10:41:18 No.872089772 >>872089694(OP) # No : Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)10:42:28 No.872089809 You're gonna be r---- by Family Court if she pops out a little you.
: Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)10:38:44 No.872089694 I met a drunk girl at the bar and I went back to her apartment. She was on top and I told her to get off because I was going to c-- and she said "it's fine just do it, c-- inside me" | told her no and to get off but she just rode harder and kept saying "c-- for me" over and over. I tried to get her off me but I couldn't. 48 KB JPG What do I do now? Was I r----? : Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)10:41:18 No.872089772 >>872089694(OP) # No : Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)10:42:28 No.872089809 You're gonna be r---- by Family Court if she pops out a little you.

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Anon asks for a PC | /r/Greentext

>be me >be 15 >be poor >my dad works all the time >l'm always asking for him to buy me a pc 39 KB JPG >my birthday comes by >l get nothing >Christmas comes by >l get nothing >my birthday was coming up >figured I wasn't going to get anything again >two weeks before my birthday >my dad gets into a car crash >dies >were going through his things >see a box in the closet marked "anon" >l open it up >it's a box full of computer parts >the only thing missing was a graphics card >turns out he was saving up money for a year to buy me this >his funeral goes by >l decide to put it all together >talk to a tech friend of mine >use that pc for 5 years >only ever get more ram >I kept it as it was for five years >today my girlfriend comes over >we get in a fight >she throws my pc on to the ground >l threw her out >l didn't realize my attachment to that pc until it didn't boot up >mfw my girlfriend destroyed my only connection to my dad >mfw it didn't boot
>be me >be 15 >be poor >my dad works all the time >l'm always asking for him to buy me a pc 39 KB JPG >my birthday comes by >l get nothing >Christmas comes by >l get nothing >my birthday was coming up >figured I wasn't going to get anything again >two weeks before my birthday >my dad gets into a car crash >dies >were going through his things >see a box in the closet marked "anon" >l open it up >it's a box full of computer parts >the only thing missing was a graphics card >turns out he was saving up money for a year to buy me this >his funeral goes by >l decide to put it all together >talk to a tech friend of mine >use that pc for 5 years >only ever get more ram >I kept it as it was for five years >today my girlfriend comes over >we get in a fight >she throws my pc on to the ground >l threw her out >l didn't realize my attachment to that pc until it didn't boot up >mfw my girlfriend destroyed my only connection to my dad >mfw it didn't boot

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Anon wants to catchem all | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Legends Arceus is so fun 02/03/22(Thu)18:09:31 No.49538074 57B5399B-5B93-435C-8169-647296068410.jpg 798 KB JPG Was at a murder trial today and just couldn't put down Pokemon Legends Arceus. The Switch is so amazing for letting me play anywhere.
: Anonymous Legends Arceus is so fun 02/03/22(Thu)18:09:31 No.49538074 57B5399B-5B93-435C-8169-647296068410.jpg 798 KB JPG Was at a murder trial today and just couldn't put down Pokemon Legends Arceus. The Switch is so amazing for letting me play anywhere.

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Anons' views on manlets | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/05/19(Fri)14:16:11 No.51794620 File: 1537704131421.png (88 KB, 264x245) >>51794633 >be 6'2 >out walking >see manlet >ask him where the other six dwarfs are Anonymous 04/05/19(Fri)14:17:25 No.51794633 File: pepechamp.jpg (50 KB, 788x685) >>51794620 # >be 6'4 >girl asks how tall I am >say 6 foot >just made manlets even shorter
Anonymous 04/05/19(Fri)14:16:11 No.51794620 File: 1537704131421.png (88 KB, 264x245) >>51794633 >be 6'2 >out walking >see manlet >ask him where the other six dwarfs are Anonymous 04/05/19(Fri)14:17:25 No.51794633 File: pepechamp.jpg (50 KB, 788x685) >>51794620 # >be 6'4 >girl asks how tall I am >say 6 foot >just made manlets even shorter

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Anon discovers what we've known for years | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)20:43:47 No.872049730 I've discovered that I'm mentally retarded, What to do now? 67 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)20:54:47 No.872050277 up : Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)20:55:58 No.872050321 join the amish 42 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)20:55:59 No.872050322 >>872049730 (OP) # post on /b/ 8 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)20:57:48 No.872050420 >>872049730 (OP) # You are legally exempt from all crimes. So go wild.
: Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)20:43:47 No.872049730 I've discovered that I'm mentally retarded, What to do now? 67 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)20:54:47 No.872050277 up : Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)20:55:58 No.872050321 join the amish 42 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)20:55:59 No.872050322 >>872049730 (OP) # post on /b/ 8 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)20:57:48 No.872050420 >>872049730 (OP) # You are legally exempt from all crimes. So go wild.

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Evil. Evil. Evil. | /r/Greentext

1537264774886.jpg 11 KB JPG >Order fries with no salt, causing the staff to cook a new batch >Put on salt myself Everything in this world is part of mv game
1537264774886.jpg 11 KB JPG >Order fries with no salt, causing the staff to cook a new batch >Put on salt myself Everything in this world is part of mv game

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Anon bites his tongue | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)13:33:41 No.67286033 >eating food >accidentally bite tongue hard >spot that got bit swells up to create a larger target >now it's easier to accidentally bite the same spot again 64 KB JPG : Obese !!rj2eZZnR9IG 02/04/22(Fri)13:34:17 No.67286037 shouldnt have bit your own tongue then bud
: Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)13:33:41 No.67286033 >eating food >accidentally bite tongue hard >spot that got bit swells up to create a larger target >now it's easier to accidentally bite the same spot again 64 KB JPG : Obese !!rj2eZZnR9IG 02/04/22(Fri)13:34:17 No.67286037 shouldnt have bit your own tongue then bud

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Anon makes a deal with the devil | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/14/17(Fri)15:49:12 No.38371043 >uncle was dying of cancer >on hospital bed >doctors said he had 1 day left to live >sad, go to my room and lock the door >radomly decide to do a blood sacrifice by sacrificing my life for his >drew a pentagram on a piece of paper 19 KB JPG and then cut my palm with a knife and soaked the paper with blood >prayed that my uncle gets better in exchange for my life >next day uncle makes a miraculous recovery This was just a coincidence r-right?
: Anonymous 07/14/17(Fri)15:49:12 No.38371043 >uncle was dying of cancer >on hospital bed >doctors said he had 1 day left to live >sad, go to my room and lock the door >radomly decide to do a blood sacrifice by sacrificing my life for his >drew a pentagram on a piece of paper 19 KB JPG and then cut my palm with a knife and soaked the paper with blood >prayed that my uncle gets better in exchange for my life >next day uncle makes a miraculous recovery This was just a coincidence r-right?

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Anon sends Snapchat streaks | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)22:02:15 No.872080322 Fellas, am I stupid or is this girl stupid? >be me >senior in high school >have Snapchat 23 KB JPG >this girl adds me >l barely know her, I think I sat next to her once in sophomore year >decide to send streaks >"I don't do streaks" >huh.mp4 >ask her why >"streaks take so much time to do and also we're high schoolers and streaks are for middle schoolers lol" Am I disabled or is this girl actually f------ retarded? It takes a total of 10 seconds to do streaks and everyone I have streaks with is a junior or above at my school. I cannot fathom this s---. : Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)22:04:00 No.872080431 >>872080322 (OP) # What the f--- do you mean by "streaks", kiddo? l'm not hip to your jive.
: Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)22:02:15 No.872080322 Fellas, am I stupid or is this girl stupid? >be me >senior in high school >have Snapchat 23 KB JPG >this girl adds me >l barely know her, I think I sat next to her once in sophomore year >decide to send streaks >"I don't do streaks" >huh.mp4 >ask her why >"streaks take so much time to do and also we're high schoolers and streaks are for middle schoolers lol" Am I disabled or is this girl actually f------ retarded? It takes a total of 10 seconds to do streaks and everyone I have streaks with is a junior or above at my school. I cannot fathom this s---. : Anonymous 02/04/22(Fri)22:04:00 No.872080431 >>872080322 (OP) # What the f--- do you mean by "streaks", kiddo? l'm not hip to your jive.

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Sanest man on 4chan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)02:32:46 No.67290413 >at gfs house >casually binging youtube while she takes a shower >she asks me to give her a new bath towel >open the door to give her the 215 KB GIF towel >shes not there >the shower isnt even on >take a moment to process >im in someone's house >last time I talked to anyone was 10 yrs ago >never had a GF (29) >the walls are turning to white >a straight jacket is wrapped around me >im a the psych ward >mfw I trolled myself again by taking the meds
: Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)02:32:46 No.67290413 >at gfs house >casually binging youtube while she takes a shower >she asks me to give her a new bath towel >open the door to give her the 215 KB GIF towel >shes not there >the shower isnt even on >take a moment to process >im in someone's house >last time I talked to anyone was 10 yrs ago >never had a GF (29) >the walls are turning to white >a straight jacket is wrapped around me >im a the psych ward >mfw I trolled myself again by taking the meds

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Anon meets the shadow man | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/30/22(Sun)07:23:16 No.30900816 Almost certainly a dream; but I remember >being a kid waking up in middle of night at grandparents house, >get out of race car bed for a drink >go downstairs >shadow man with wide brimmed hat sitting on couch >l sit on his lap Don't remember much else >>30902486 # >>30910604 # >>30911784 # >>30917149 # >>30921638 # : Anonymous 01/31/22(Mon)10:11:44 No.30911784 >>30900816 # >be shadow man >going about my shadow business one night >floating through a house, decide to take a break on the couch >oh s--- this kid's still awake >instead of screaming and running away he just comes in and sits on my lap >get kind of sad because he must be lonely as s---
: Anonymous 01/30/22(Sun)07:23:16 No.30900816 Almost certainly a dream; but I remember >being a kid waking up in middle of night at grandparents house, >get out of race car bed for a drink >go downstairs >shadow man with wide brimmed hat sitting on couch >l sit on his lap Don't remember much else >>30902486 # >>30910604 # >>30911784 # >>30917149 # >>30921638 # : Anonymous 01/31/22(Mon)10:11:44 No.30911784 >>30900816 # >be shadow man >going about my shadow business one night >floating through a house, decide to take a break on the couch >oh s--- this kid's still awake >instead of screaming and running away he just comes in and sits on my lap >get kind of sad because he must be lonely as s---

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Anon goes on a run | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/30/20(Thu)19:05:25 No.56511154 >join running group >run leader tells us to sprint up a hill as fast as we can >leg it past everyone else >he pulls me over afterwards and goes on this passive-aggressive talk about how it's not a 16 KB PNG competition >try to rejoin group, he literally puts out an arm in front of me and asks if I understand >he's treating me like a child and I'll look like even more of a child if I argue so I walk away >was literally shaking at the unfairness You literally told us to go as fast as possible you power-tripping c---. F--- normies and f--- socialising.
: Anonymous 01/30/20(Thu)19:05:25 No.56511154 >join running group >run leader tells us to sprint up a hill as fast as we can >leg it past everyone else >he pulls me over afterwards and goes on this passive-aggressive talk about how it's not a 16 KB PNG competition >try to rejoin group, he literally puts out an arm in front of me and asks if I understand >he's treating me like a child and I'll look like even more of a child if I argue so I walk away >was literally shaking at the unfairness You literally told us to go as fast as possible you power-tripping c---. F--- normies and f--- socialising.

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Anon chews 5 gum | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/07/18(Sun)22:59:29 No.781775753 >be me >19 yo 6/10 >Go out to movie with bestie of 3 years >9/10 >Its technically a date >Dinner and movie 5 KB PNG >Get ice cream afterwards >Give her a glass flower I bought earlier in the month >She loves it and we go for a walk >Pull out 5GUM:TRUTH OR DARE PACK >Her wrapper says take a selfie with eyes closed >She does >I read mine It says to ask the most beautiful person in the room to kiss >We laugh it off but u remember the glass flower base has a mirror on the bottom side Where's the most beautiful girl at though? >Look at the mirrored base Oh look I found her! >Showed her the mirrored base of the flower >We smile and kiss for the first time ever >She reads the other part of the wrapper >"What's the most romantic moment you've shared with the person next to you?" >"This one right now" >mfw how it feels to chew 5gum
: Anonymous 10/07/18(Sun)22:59:29 No.781775753 >be me >19 yo 6/10 >Go out to movie with bestie of 3 years >9/10 >Its technically a date >Dinner and movie 5 KB PNG >Get ice cream afterwards >Give her a glass flower I bought earlier in the month >She loves it and we go for a walk >Pull out 5GUM:TRUTH OR DARE PACK >Her wrapper says take a selfie with eyes closed >She does >I read mine It says to ask the most beautiful person in the room to kiss >We laugh it off but u remember the glass flower base has a mirror on the bottom side Where's the most beautiful girl at though? >Look at the mirrored base Oh look I found her! >Showed her the mirrored base of the flower >We smile and kiss for the first time ever >She reads the other part of the wrapper >"What's the most romantic moment you've shared with the person next to you?" >"This one right now" >mfw how it feels to chew 5gum

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