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Anon doesn't know what boundaries are. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)20:57:31 No.67525262 >>67515557 # >learn how to flirt >decide to try it in person >she freaks out >cops arrive and remove me >awaiting court date for sexual harassment
: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)20:57:31 No.67525262 >>67515557 # >learn how to flirt >decide to try it in person >she freaks out >cops arrive and remove me >awaiting court date for sexual harassment

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Anon contemplates women | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/16/18(Fri)20:13:00 No.43912176 Why do women always bring the worst out in men? I mean, yeah. That's not really their fault. This is on us, if anything. But it seems that when we're in the presence of the female gender, we just stop functioning. 467 KB PNG >at con >solaire cosplay >practised praising the sun >squat, extend, arms out, "praise the sun!" >just those four steps >get pictures taken doing this >mostly with other cosplayers >qt wants one >fuckyes.gif >stand next to her >same four steps as always >squat >extend >arms out >brain has a glitch and says "heil hitler!" instead
: Anonymous 03/16/18(Fri)20:13:00 No.43912176 Why do women always bring the worst out in men? I mean, yeah. That's not really their fault. This is on us, if anything. But it seems that when we're in the presence of the female gender, we just stop functioning. 467 KB PNG >at con >solaire cosplay >practised praising the sun >squat, extend, arms out, "praise the sun!" >just those four steps >get pictures taken doing this >mostly with other cosplayers >qt wants one >fuckyes.gif >stand next to her >same four steps as always >squat >extend >arms out >brain has a glitch and says "heil hitler!" instead

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Anon is from South | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/19/20(Thu)01:35:05 No.142310924 1591490846508.png 250 KB PNG >southern character in a movie >WELLL I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT BUT WELLLLL I DON'T KNOW ABOUT ANY OF THAT BIG CITY STUFF BUT WELLLLLLLLL I'M FROM THE SOUTH, AND DOWN HERE WE DO THINGS A BIT DIFFERENTLY!
: Anonymous 11/19/20(Thu)01:35:05 No.142310924 1591490846508.png 250 KB PNG >southern character in a movie >WELLL I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT BUT WELLLLL I DON'T KNOW ABOUT ANY OF THAT BIG CITY STUFF BUT WELLLLLLLLL I'M FROM THE SOUTH, AND DOWN HERE WE DO THINGS A BIT DIFFERENTLY!

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Care for some tea, anons? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/04/21(Thu)23:36:54 No.111317 CREUST 1635386665433.png 89 KB PNG >l'm a little teapot, short and stout >Here is my handle, here is my spout
: Anonymous 11/04/21(Thu)23:36:54 No.111317 CREUST 1635386665433.png 89 KB PNG >l'm a little teapot, short and stout >Here is my handle, here is my spout

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Anon learns to love history. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/28/19(Thu)13:22:26 No.793824259 True Story >Be me in middle school. >Around 10 or 11. >Assassin's Creed 2 comes out. >My favorite game growing up. >Always thought Ezio was the coolest since I was a social 165 KB JPG outcast that was bullied. >Wanted to be strong and cool like him. >Anyways, we're learning about European history in my history class. >My state holds an educational assessment for all students to take. >Playing Assassin's Creed and this game sparks my love for history. >Reading books, articles online, etc. >Just filling my head with all this info. >Day of the assessment and l'm breezing through it. >Month or two later and we get our results back. >Teacher tells the class, "Only one person got a perfect score on this test in the whole school." >Kids say, "Who? WHO?!" Teacher makes a long pause, looks at me, and says, "It's Anon." >Everybody in the class was shocked. >Where my love for history started. Thanks, Ezio.
: Anonymous 02/28/19(Thu)13:22:26 No.793824259 True Story >Be me in middle school. >Around 10 or 11. >Assassin's Creed 2 comes out. >My favorite game growing up. >Always thought Ezio was the coolest since I was a social 165 KB JPG outcast that was bullied. >Wanted to be strong and cool like him. >Anyways, we're learning about European history in my history class. >My state holds an educational assessment for all students to take. >Playing Assassin's Creed and this game sparks my love for history. >Reading books, articles online, etc. >Just filling my head with all this info. >Day of the assessment and l'm breezing through it. >Month or two later and we get our results back. >Teacher tells the class, "Only one person got a perfect score on this test in the whole school." >Kids say, "Who? WHO?!" Teacher makes a long pause, looks at me, and says, "It's Anon." >Everybody in the class was shocked. >Where my love for history started. Thanks, Ezio.

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Anon doesn't like Babybel cheese | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/22(Tue)12:52:27 No.17433488 babybel.jpg 417 KB JPG What are your feelings on these Babybel cheese things? : Anonymous 02/15/22(Tue)12:53:23 No.17433490 >>17433488 (OP) # Shell tastes like s---, don't know why people eat these >>17433505 # >>17433747 # >>17434392 # >>17435546 # >>17436730 # >>17436992 # >>17437007 # >>17439976 # >>17441190 # >>17441224 # >>17445354 # >>17448669 # >>17448751 # >>17449048 # >>17449260 >>17450218 # >>17454642 # >>17455790 # : Anonymous 02/15/22(Tue)12:57:25 No.17433505 >>17433490 # anon...
: Anonymous 02/15/22(Tue)12:52:27 No.17433488 babybel.jpg 417 KB JPG What are your feelings on these Babybel cheese things? : Anonymous 02/15/22(Tue)12:53:23 No.17433490 >>17433488 (OP) # Shell tastes like s---, don't know why people eat these >>17433505 # >>17433747 # >>17434392 # >>17435546 # >>17436730 # >>17436992 # >>17437007 # >>17439976 # >>17441190 # >>17441224 # >>17445354 # >>17448669 # >>17448751 # >>17449048 # >>17449260 >>17450218 # >>17454642 # >>17455790 # : Anonymous 02/15/22(Tue)12:57:25 No.17433505 >>17433490 # anon...

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Anon slips. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)23:20:59 No.67527667 >having sex for first time >d--- slips out of vagina >enters a------ >girl let's out a little scream >starts saying I anally r---- her Is a d--- slip into the a------ really r---? Even if it'd in the midst of consensual intercourse? What do I do 558 KB PNG now bros?
Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)23:20:59 No.67527667 >having sex for first time >d--- slips out of vagina >enters a------ >girl let's out a little scream >starts saying I anally r---- her Is a d--- slip into the a------ really r---? Even if it'd in the midst of consensual intercourse? What do I do 558 KB PNG now bros?

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Anon almost makes it | /r/Greentext

>cute new coworker at work >l interact with her multiple times a day handing her documents >pay her little attention always keeping things work related >fast forward 6 months >walk by to take trash outside, she's looking at me >walk back in to warehouse >she's leaning on her desk with ass straight up in air >catches me looking but I keep my cool and move on >day passes >every time we talk work related s--- she gets super close into personal space |>another day I'm alone in break room washing mug at sink >she walks in >"Hey anon, how old are you?" >28 >"wooooow, I thought you were like 23!!!" (Her age) >l just say thanks keeping my cool >one Monday she asks how my weekend was, told her I went hiking, she lit up excited >i asked her what she did over weekend >she went to a brewery with her sister >asks if I've gone to a brewery >"No" >"ohhh we should go to a brewery sometime" >dropped the ball and didn't say "sure, let me get your number we'll go soon" >just said sure, sometime >few days pass >see her in break room alone, ask if she plans on bringing lunch tomorrow >she says she's not sure >if you decide not to bring a lunch then lunch is on me >oh nice, yeah sure >we go get lunch next day >she got sneaky and handed her card to cashier and said I could pay for the next lunch >good vibes the whole time the hour lunch we had, didn't get her number because we were deep in convo >a week or so later tell her l'd like to treat her to some lunch >same as above good convo and vibes the whole time didn't get her number >at the end of the second lunch I say she can pick the next spot, she says she thinks sushi is next >two weeks pass, I ssk if she'd like to get sushi, she says sure >whats your number l'll send the details >she puts in her number >l send her a text later "here's the spot, let me know what day works for you" | >GHOSTED she started taking her lunches earlier to avoid me, I keep my cool and go back to keeping s--- 100% professional, what I do? |
>cute new coworker at work >l interact with her multiple times a day handing her documents >pay her little attention always keeping things work related >fast forward 6 months >walk by to take trash outside, she's looking at me >walk back in to warehouse >she's leaning on her desk with ass straight up in air >catches me looking but I keep my cool and move on >day passes >every time we talk work related s--- she gets super close into personal space |>another day I'm alone in break room washing mug at sink >she walks in >"Hey anon, how old are you?" >28 >"wooooow, I thought you were like 23!!!" (Her age) >l just say thanks keeping my cool >one Monday she asks how my weekend was, told her I went hiking, she lit up excited >i asked her what she did over weekend >she went to a brewery with her sister >asks if I've gone to a brewery >"No" >"ohhh we should go to a brewery sometime" >dropped the ball and didn't say "sure, let me get your number we'll go soon" >just said sure, sometime >few days pass >see her in break room alone, ask if she plans on bringing lunch tomorrow >she says she's not sure >if you decide not to bring a lunch then lunch is on me >oh nice, yeah sure >we go get lunch next day >she got sneaky and handed her card to cashier and said I could pay for the next lunch >good vibes the whole time the hour lunch we had, didn't get her number because we were deep in convo >a week or so later tell her l'd like to treat her to some lunch >same as above good convo and vibes the whole time didn't get her number >at the end of the second lunch I say she can pick the next spot, she says she thinks sushi is next >two weeks pass, I ssk if she'd like to get sushi, she says sure >whats your number l'll send the details >she puts in her number >l send her a text later "here's the spot, let me know what day works for you" | >GHOSTED she started taking her lunches earlier to avoid me, I keep my cool and go back to keeping s--- 100% professional, what I do? |

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Anon want snu snu | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/22/22(Tue)09:34:51 No.65673016 File: 1645497123877.jpg (191 KB, 680x561) >>65663580 (OP) >be me >6'8" >260lb >lifting since I was 16 to cope with back problems >only get attention from women under 5'5" >had a giantess fetish since I was a boy It sucks anons, I just want to be the little spoon
Anonymous 02/22/22(Tue)09:34:51 No.65673016 File: 1645497123877.jpg (191 KB, 680x561) >>65663580 (OP) >be me >6'8" >260lb >lifting since I was 16 to cope with back problems >only get attention from women under 5'5" >had a giantess fetish since I was a boy It sucks anons, I just want to be the little spoon

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Anon is subhuman scum | /r/Greentext


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Anon Frames A Fan | /r/Greentext


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anon has low self-esteem | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/24/18(Tue)11:29:46 No.47026906 >girl shows interest in me >literally can't stop laughing at her abysmal ability to select mates 206 KB PNG
: Anonymous 07/24/18(Tue)11:29:46 No.47026906 >girl shows interest in me >literally can't stop laughing at her abysmal ability to select mates 206 KB PNG

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Hank is diesel. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)17:14:04 No.873142473 >Be me >Hank The Tank >500lbs >Absolute unit >Break into 28 homes >lgnore the homeowners and eat their food 83 KB JPG >Exit the home >lgnore the numerous traps left out to catch me by State Wildlife Officials >Never go into hibernation
: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)17:14:04 No.873142473 >Be me >Hank The Tank >500lbs >Absolute unit >Break into 28 homes >lgnore the homeowners and eat their food 83 KB JPG >Exit the home >lgnore the numerous traps left out to catch me by State Wildlife Officials >Never go into hibernation

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Anon meets cute girl. | /r/Greentext

True story >Be me >Be 30 mins ago >Be virgin >Feelsbaman >Meet cute girl >Drive to girls house, watch some GOT and then we head up to her room 75.0 kB JPG >oHshit.avi >She starts kissing me >next thing i know im eating her out >Think about the stupid post where someone made a girl c-- by spelling out 'AyyLmao' on her vagina. >Laugh >Erection lost >Dosent come back Why did i loose my best opportunity to loose my virginity thanks to you f---.
True story >Be me >Be 30 mins ago >Be virgin >Feelsbaman >Meet cute girl >Drive to girls house, watch some GOT and then we head up to her room 75.0 kB JPG >oHshit.avi >She starts kissing me >next thing i know im eating her out >Think about the stupid post where someone made a girl c-- by spelling out 'AyyLmao' on her vagina. >Laugh >Erection lost >Dosent come back Why did i loose my best opportunity to loose my virginity thanks to you f---.

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And then everyone stood up and clapped. | /r/Greentext

File: 1CBBE644-1143-40E7-A97B-1(..).jpg (225 KB, 1440x1800) O Playing the long-game for p---- Anonymous 02/22/22(Tue)04:26:12 No.25907414 > >25908119>>2590827 1 >>25908778 >be me >I like big butts and always have >l also have an Asian fetish >naturally, I can't get what I want >l used to go on African Dating sites in the very early 2000's >strung along a lot of women, got pictures of their big butts >back at home, there was no supply of that on hand besides a male friend >we had worked out together a lot and he just exploded in the right places >butterface with just an bubble butt that couldn't stop growing >even though he made me question my sexuality, I'm not gay and I had a solution >l flew the curviest, most sexy African girl out to the college I studied at >I told her to pretend she was a foreign exchange student and set her up with that guy >this guy was a virgin, so I gave him a condom I had poked a hole in >he came, I sent her back home, she later told me she was pregnant >1 pretended like it was mine and she went along with it, so I've paid small amounts of money monthly to keep the child in good health >she's a girl and she's turning 18 next week >her body is incredible >pants-busting ass, rippling abdominals, thick Asian legs, and C cup t--- >l've gifted her mother a large sum of money (by their standards) to fly her out to me once she's 18 >I have created the hottest woman I have ever seen I mentioned this to my therapist and she about lost her s---, saying it was the most advanced case of grooming she had ever heard of. Me personally, I don't believe it's that bad, since it's been consensual the entire time. Anonymous 02/22/22(Tue)06:05:21 No.25908100 ► Epic absolutely epic based and gamerpilled
File: 1CBBE644-1143-40E7-A97B-1(..).jpg (225 KB, 1440x1800) O Playing the long-game for p---- Anonymous 02/22/22(Tue)04:26:12 No.25907414 > >25908119>>2590827 1 >>25908778 >be me >I like big butts and always have >l also have an Asian fetish >naturally, I can't get what I want >l used to go on African Dating sites in the very early 2000's >strung along a lot of women, got pictures of their big butts >back at home, there was no supply of that on hand besides a male friend >we had worked out together a lot and he just exploded in the right places >butterface with just an bubble butt that couldn't stop growing >even though he made me question my sexuality, I'm not gay and I had a solution >l flew the curviest, most sexy African girl out to the college I studied at >I told her to pretend she was a foreign exchange student and set her up with that guy >this guy was a virgin, so I gave him a condom I had poked a hole in >he came, I sent her back home, she later told me she was pregnant >1 pretended like it was mine and she went along with it, so I've paid small amounts of money monthly to keep the child in good health >she's a girl and she's turning 18 next week >her body is incredible >pants-busting ass, rippling abdominals, thick Asian legs, and C cup t--- >l've gifted her mother a large sum of money (by their standards) to fly her out to me once she's 18 >I have created the hottest woman I have ever seen I mentioned this to my therapist and she about lost her s---, saying it was the most advanced case of grooming she had ever heard of. Me personally, I don't believe it's that bad, since it's been consensual the entire time. Anonymous 02/22/22(Tue)06:05:21 No.25908100 ► Epic absolutely epic based and gamerpilled

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Anon sums up the human evolution | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/12/22(Sat)07:43:30 No.4070008 Large Anomalocaris compared to a 1.8 meter tall person. 2 DIMENSIONS IN METERS ©www.prehistoric-wildlife.com 09-06-2020 anomalocaris-Size.jpg| 74 KB JPG >literally just grow bigger than the other fish >dominate the planet
: Anonymous 02/12/22(Sat)07:43:30 No.4070008 Large Anomalocaris compared to a 1.8 meter tall person. 2 DIMENSIONS IN METERS ©www.prehistoric-wildlife.com 09-06-2020 anomalocaris-Size.jpg| 74 KB JPG >literally just grow bigger than the other fish >dominate the planet

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Anon shares his mother’s hobby with us. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: ZkJcJf/a) 02/17/22(Thu)15:38:17 No.361665969 >>361659213 (OP) # I knew a milf that had sex with retards. It was her hobby and she was open about it. She told me that it felt wonderful being able to provide romantic love and intimacy for people who struggled so hard to understand the world. The way she described it was that it was like being f----- by an animal, since they operate on instinct when it comes to sex. Most are chronic masturbators and are desensitized to sustained contact, so retards f--- hard and long, and they're very selfish in bed. She enjoyed seducing them and the way they reacted when she let on that she was serious and wanted them to mount her. She told me that she never used condoms when she had sex with retards, not because she liked them, but because it was degrading and thrilling for such a terribly misshapen person to c-- inside of her and get her pregnant. According to her, she had aborted 15 retard babies over the years. Think about that. Think about how much sex with retards she had to have been having to get knocked up with downy sperm 15 times. She was incredibly hot even at 45 but after knowing that possibly a hundred or more retards had their way with her and had c-- inside her, I couldn't bring myself to have sex with her. She seemed really into me though, and I'm not really sure why. >>361666359 # >>361666415 # >>361684783 # >>361701025 # >>361702240 # >>361702499 # >>361702642 # >>361703054 # >>361703857 # >>361707062 # >>361707216 # >>361707471 # >>361707697 # >>361707746 # >>361707772 # >>361707832 #
: Anonymous (ID: ZkJcJf/a) 02/17/22(Thu)15:38:17 No.361665969 >>361659213 (OP) # I knew a milf that had sex with retards. It was her hobby and she was open about it. She told me that it felt wonderful being able to provide romantic love and intimacy for people who struggled so hard to understand the world. The way she described it was that it was like being f----- by an animal, since they operate on instinct when it comes to sex. Most are chronic masturbators and are desensitized to sustained contact, so retards f--- hard and long, and they're very selfish in bed. She enjoyed seducing them and the way they reacted when she let on that she was serious and wanted them to mount her. She told me that she never used condoms when she had sex with retards, not because she liked them, but because it was degrading and thrilling for such a terribly misshapen person to c-- inside of her and get her pregnant. According to her, she had aborted 15 retard babies over the years. Think about that. Think about how much sex with retards she had to have been having to get knocked up with downy sperm 15 times. She was incredibly hot even at 45 but after knowing that possibly a hundred or more retards had their way with her and had c-- inside her, I couldn't bring myself to have sex with her. She seemed really into me though, and I'm not really sure why. >>361666359 # >>361666415 # >>361684783 # >>361701025 # >>361702240 # >>361702499 # >>361702642 # >>361703054 # >>361703857 # >>361707062 # >>361707216 # >>361707471 # >>361707697 # >>361707746 # >>361707772 # >>361707832 #

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Anon is Tom Hanks | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)14:41:11 No.873123442 >be me >Tom Hanks >make $60 million by pretending to be retarded for Forrest Gump Why are you not doing this to make money Anons? You don't even need to act retarded, just be 647 KB JPG yourself.
: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)14:41:11 No.873123442 >be me >Tom Hanks >make $60 million by pretending to be retarded for Forrest Gump Why are you not doing this to make money Anons? You don't even need to act retarded, just be 647 KB JPG yourself.

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Anon is a good singer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/08/19(Fri)20:30:51 No.55252651 I JUST CAAALLED TO SAAAAY I LOOOVE YOUUUU 28 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/08/19(Fri)20:33:45 No.55252698 >>55252651 (OP) # damn anon, you have such a beautiful voice 181 KB PNG
: Anonymous 11/08/19(Fri)20:30:51 No.55252651 I JUST CAAALLED TO SAAAAY I LOOOVE YOUUUU 28 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/08/19(Fri)20:33:45 No.55252698 >>55252651 (OP) # damn anon, you have such a beautiful voice 181 KB PNG

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Anon makes good pizza | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/31/18(Sat)03:07:57 No.764293421 >be me >neet loser >hate myself >not good at anything >it's pizza friday >my mom makes the pizza dough, and i make the rest of it 69 KB JPG >mom usually doesn't have pizza >eat my pizza upstairs in my room >tasty.png >go downstairs for more >my mom calls me into her room >"hey anon, i ate some of you pizza, hope you don't mind >whatever.avi >"you make really good pizzas anon. they're the best i've ever tasted" >mom makes my bro try some of the pizza >he loves it aswell >mfw i'm actually OK at something Love you mom.
: Anonymous 03/31/18(Sat)03:07:57 No.764293421 >be me >neet loser >hate myself >not good at anything >it's pizza friday >my mom makes the pizza dough, and i make the rest of it 69 KB JPG >mom usually doesn't have pizza >eat my pizza upstairs in my room >tasty.png >go downstairs for more >my mom calls me into her room >"hey anon, i ate some of you pizza, hope you don't mind >whatever.avi >"you make really good pizzas anon. they're the best i've ever tasted" >mom makes my bro try some of the pizza >he loves it aswell >mfw i'm actually OK at something Love you mom.

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