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Xi introspects. | /r/Greentext

1/1 T2Qa8enl 8m (2/25 22:18) · 46855537 JPG 68KB · (1200 × 900) 6 Replies Ok. What happens if a woman wants it up her butt, and she has a big log up there? I mean then what? •..
1/1 T2Qa8enl 8m (2/25 22:18) · 46855537 JPG 68KB · (1200 × 900) 6 Replies Ok. What happens if a woman wants it up her butt, and she has a big log up there? I mean then what? •..

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Be greedy when others are fearful. | /r/Greentext

TWO MORE WEEKS LEFT 2/2 · U+VQLWZU 1m (2/24 9:21) · 46813555 JPG · 9KB · (244 × 207) TWO. MORE. WEEKS. >be ukranian >in bomb shelter >internet comes back for a bit (its been down from russian hacking) >walls shake (the shelling is getting closer) >top news story >US stock markets are pumping because jewish hedge fund managers are dancing on their desks over rate hike delays HONK HONK HONKHOKNOKHONHOKOHNOHONKKK
TWO MORE WEEKS LEFT 2/2 · U+VQLWZU 1m (2/24 9:21) · 46813555 JPG · 9KB · (244 × 207) TWO. MORE. WEEKS. >be ukranian >in bomb shelter >internet comes back for a bit (its been down from russian hacking) >walls shake (the shelling is getting closer) >top news story >US stock markets are pumping because jewish hedge fund managers are dancing on their desks over rate hike delays HONK HONK HONKHOKNOKHONHOKOHNOHONKKK

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Anon listens to post apocalyptic radio. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)14:21:55 No.873374030 >walk home >play fallout new vegas radio >pretend im walking across the map >walking home becomes less boring >(: 20 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)14:21:55 No.873374030 >walk home >play fallout new vegas radio >pretend im walking across the map >walking home becomes less boring >(: 20 KB JPG

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Anon’s wish comes true | /r/Greentext


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Anon refuses the pitch | /r/Greentext


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Annon is tired | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Friendly Reminder 02/25/22(Fri)21:50:29 No.22110545 >No amount of p--- collecting and thread curation is going to substitute not having sex with a real woman. >No amount of seeing t---, ass, & p---- on a screen will ever equate to having sexual experience. >Watching another man f------ a woman, even in a video clip, is tantamount to 3.1 MB GIF being a cuck. Have a nice day. : Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)21:56:50 No.22110579 >>22110545 (OP) # Good thing I only watch men f------ other men. >>22112527 #
: Anonymous Friendly Reminder 02/25/22(Fri)21:50:29 No.22110545 >No amount of p--- collecting and thread curation is going to substitute not having sex with a real woman. >No amount of seeing t---, ass, & p---- on a screen will ever equate to having sexual experience. >Watching another man f------ a woman, even in a video clip, is tantamount to 3.1 MB GIF being a cuck. Have a nice day. : Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)21:56:50 No.22110579 >>22110545 (OP) # Good thing I only watch men f------ other men. >>22112527 #

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Anon’s a retard | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/23/18(Sat)19:13:48 No.772383429 >be 9 >playing Paper Mario >halfway through game get to part where you have to buy a quest item from a store >shop owner (toad) says item is out of stock and will be in stock soon 309 KB PNG >assume it means I have to actually WAIT for it >spend 3 IRL months checking in the game to see if the item has come in stock yet >8 years later watching a speedrun of the game >realize you didn't have to f------ wait for it, you just had to f------ continue the game and it'd come after a checkpoint am I retarded 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 06/23/18(Sat)19:26:54 No.772384417 yes
: Anonymous 06/23/18(Sat)19:13:48 No.772383429 >be 9 >playing Paper Mario >halfway through game get to part where you have to buy a quest item from a store >shop owner (toad) says item is out of stock and will be in stock soon 309 KB PNG >assume it means I have to actually WAIT for it >spend 3 IRL months checking in the game to see if the item has come in stock yet >8 years later watching a speedrun of the game >realize you didn't have to f------ wait for it, you just had to f------ continue the game and it'd come after a checkpoint am I retarded 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 06/23/18(Sat)19:26:54 No.772384417 yes

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Anon is scared | /r/Greentext

File: 596E7767-C514-457E-B50A-A(...).jpg (23 KB, 399x388) O Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)16:30:56 No.873350762 > mfw there might be french "people" amongst us
File: 596E7767-C514-457E-B50A-A(...).jpg (23 KB, 399x388) O Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)16:30:56 No.873350762 > mfw there might be french "people" amongst us

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Anon tries green texting | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)06:47:15 No.873349450 >be me >am virgin (for comedic affect) >find a consenting girl through unspecified means >sex.mp4 >sex is interrupted by y >ben shapiro bursts through the door >girl is killed the moment she lays eyes on 76 KB JPG him >before knocking me unconscious he starts. voice memo om his phone saying another libcuck owned >unconscious >wake up >"hey you, you're finally awake" >press t and type /kill >wake up and something happens with n------??? >???? am I green texting ???? soz am new from reddit I love r/greentext :DDDDDDDDD
: Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)06:47:15 No.873349450 >be me >am virgin (for comedic affect) >find a consenting girl through unspecified means >sex.mp4 >sex is interrupted by y >ben shapiro bursts through the door >girl is killed the moment she lays eyes on 76 KB JPG him >before knocking me unconscious he starts. voice memo om his phone saying another libcuck owned >unconscious >wake up >"hey you, you're finally awake" >press t and type /kill >wake up and something happens with n------??? >???? am I green texting ???? soz am new from reddit I love r/greentext :DDDDDDDDD

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Anon got what he deserved. | /r/Greentext


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Anon unravels the mystery. | /r/Greentext

File: istockphoto-469877055-612x612.jpg (52 KB, 612x461) O Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)18:48:20 No.873361309 >be me, 21, psychotic >act stupid around everyone >ffw half a year >scare away my GF >ruin my finances >lose all credibility >lose job >lose all friends >lose family >lose home >live 4 years on the street, eventually psychosis disappeared on its own >find myself in a interesting spot >zero obligations >no possessions to worry about >no people to impress, no show to maintain >life is literally eat-drink-sleep >realize im happy >being outside all day made me fit >no depressions anymore either >meet lots of interesting people while traveling the land >meet kind people >occasionally work for random people, gardening, cleaning etc >don't smoke anymore, due to lack of money >don't shiver anymore when temperatures are lower than 10C° >meet nice girl >fall in love >get a place to stay with her >she moves in >slowly all the problems from the past creep into my life again >start smoking >get fat >worried about possessions >worried about losing her >get depressed That's it. Im going FULL MONK NOW!
File: istockphoto-469877055-612x612.jpg (52 KB, 612x461) O Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)18:48:20 No.873361309 >be me, 21, psychotic >act stupid around everyone >ffw half a year >scare away my GF >ruin my finances >lose all credibility >lose job >lose all friends >lose family >lose home >live 4 years on the street, eventually psychosis disappeared on its own >find myself in a interesting spot >zero obligations >no possessions to worry about >no people to impress, no show to maintain >life is literally eat-drink-sleep >realize im happy >being outside all day made me fit >no depressions anymore either >meet lots of interesting people while traveling the land >meet kind people >occasionally work for random people, gardening, cleaning etc >don't smoke anymore, due to lack of money >don't shiver anymore when temperatures are lower than 10C° >meet nice girl >fall in love >get a place to stay with her >she moves in >slowly all the problems from the past creep into my life again >start smoking >get fat >worried about possessions >worried about losing her >get depressed That's it. Im going FULL MONK NOW!

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Anon does a little trolling | /r/Greentext


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Anon on the Russian mystery machine. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: FUFqqcT1 We overestimated Russia 02/25/22(Fri)20:17:53 No.363392317 russianmilitary.jpg 29 KB JPG I thought they had a decent military? This is so scooby doo s--- here. If this was what my country gave me to assault another country I would straight up desert. in
: Anonymous (ID: FUFqqcT1 We overestimated Russia 02/25/22(Fri)20:17:53 No.363392317 russianmilitary.jpg 29 KB JPG I thought they had a decent military? This is so scooby doo s--- here. If this was what my country gave me to assault another country I would straight up desert. in

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The average 4chan user gets a job | /r/Greentext

Just got a job >20 year old autist >working drive through at mcdonalds >"I'll have 2 chicken sandwiches 1 with no tomato" >"which one do you not want tomato on?" >some brief silence and a muffled sound >"either one, man" >messed up their change tto0
Just got a job >20 year old autist >working drive through at mcdonalds >"I'll have 2 chicken sandwiches 1 with no tomato" >"which one do you not want tomato on?" >some brief silence and a muffled sound >"either one, man" >messed up their change tto0

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Anon was outraged | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/17/21(Sat)18:36:55 No.153753695 1626497257478.jpg 217 KB JPG >wow you're so much bigger than my exes Literally turned 360 degrees and walked right out of the cinema : Anonymous 07/17/21(Sat)18:46:21 No.153754047 If you turned 360 degrees you'd still be facing the cinema.
: Anonymous 07/17/21(Sat)18:36:55 No.153753695 1626497257478.jpg 217 KB JPG >wow you're so much bigger than my exes Literally turned 360 degrees and walked right out of the cinema : Anonymous 07/17/21(Sat)18:46:21 No.153754047 If you turned 360 degrees you'd still be facing the cinema.

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7000 members and now I'm officially 1 ton | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/15/20(Tue)04:56:18 No.842375793 >get mod on a discord server with over 1000 members >instantly gain 300 pounds >mfw 9 KB JPG
: Anonymous 12/15/20(Tue)04:56:18 No.842375793 >get mod on a discord server with over 1000 members >instantly gain 300 pounds >mfw 9 KB JPG

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anon is waiting | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: SYKALAIC ) 02/24/22(Thu)00:12:32 No.362800779 I will sit here and shitpost on the funny politics board until an explosion directly hits my apartment and kills me instantly 33 KB JPG
: Anonymous (ID: SYKALAIC ) 02/24/22(Thu)00:12:32 No.362800779 I will sit here and shitpost on the funny politics board until an explosion directly hits my apartment and kills me instantly 33 KB JPG

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Guilty as charged | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/18/17(Wed)23:05:46 No.719447132 ITT: Pretend we're reddit 51 KB JPG : Anonymous 01/18/17(Wed)23:08:03 No.719447353 >s----- film reference >gay dad joke "'WOW thanks for the gold guys, lets all meet up and have a massive o--- because of how perfect we all are' >>719447581 # >>719447619 # >>719447968 # : Anonymous 01/18/17(Wed)23:10:29 No.719447581 >>719447353 # /thread
: Anonymous 01/18/17(Wed)23:05:46 No.719447132 ITT: Pretend we're reddit 51 KB JPG : Anonymous 01/18/17(Wed)23:08:03 No.719447353 >s----- film reference >gay dad joke "'WOW thanks for the gold guys, lets all meet up and have a massive o--- because of how perfect we all are' >>719447581 # >>719447619 # >>719447968 # : Anonymous 01/18/17(Wed)23:10:29 No.719447581 >>719447353 # /thread

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anon's school was worried about his comic strip | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/06/22(Sun)00:56:04 No.67308084 back in high school they sent me to the school's psychologist because my teacher found my comics notebook and they thought I was going to kill myself or something like that. I still believe those comics were really funny, specially the ping pong chad and the backflip abortion 45 KB JPG ones. I think that day my creativity died because I didn't draw comics since, I felt so judged despite it being created only for comical purposes : Anonymous 02/06/22(Sun)00:59:04 No.67308105 >>67308084 (OP) # What kind of comics were they anyway and why your teacher got panicked with them? >>67308283 # : Anonymous 02/06/22(Sun)01:18:05 No.67308283 >>67308105 # I think that the one that worried them was "ping pong chad", it might look long but it isn't, goes like this: 13 KB PNG >ugly manlet approaches stacy and says "umm hey susan, I liked you since elementary school, I wondered if we could maybe go a date this weekend and get to know eachot.." Stacy interrupts him and says "yeah whatever I'm not dating you, bag of dog c--" >superbuffed chad appears on the scene and says "hey bitch want to see how many ping pong balls can I fit in my foreskin?" and stacy replies "OMG Chad yesss!" "ugly manlet gets choleric and grabs a pistol and starts shouting "I'm tired of this, you all always ignore me and treat me like s---, now I will kill myself and you're coming with me, you will know the fear and suffering I feel everyday!" >chad says "not so fast, incel freak!" and expulses a ping pong ball at high speed out of his foreskin, conviniently hitting the guy's belt and thus letting his pants fall, showing that he was wearing women's underwear >everyone starts laughing and the incel ends up having a mental breakdown, saying things like "god no woman will ever love me, I condemned to solitude and pain". He finally blows his head withn a the gun and dies >the final panel shows chad being praised by a multitude saying "yay you saved us chad!" while he keeps doing tricks with his foreskin and the ping pong balls
: Anonymous 02/06/22(Sun)00:56:04 No.67308084 back in high school they sent me to the school's psychologist because my teacher found my comics notebook and they thought I was going to kill myself or something like that. I still believe those comics were really funny, specially the ping pong chad and the backflip abortion 45 KB JPG ones. I think that day my creativity died because I didn't draw comics since, I felt so judged despite it being created only for comical purposes : Anonymous 02/06/22(Sun)00:59:04 No.67308105 >>67308084 (OP) # What kind of comics were they anyway and why your teacher got panicked with them? >>67308283 # : Anonymous 02/06/22(Sun)01:18:05 No.67308283 >>67308105 # I think that the one that worried them was "ping pong chad", it might look long but it isn't, goes like this: 13 KB PNG >ugly manlet approaches stacy and says "umm hey susan, I liked you since elementary school, I wondered if we could maybe go a date this weekend and get to know eachot.." Stacy interrupts him and says "yeah whatever I'm not dating you, bag of dog c--" >superbuffed chad appears on the scene and says "hey bitch want to see how many ping pong balls can I fit in my foreskin?" and stacy replies "OMG Chad yesss!" "ugly manlet gets choleric and grabs a pistol and starts shouting "I'm tired of this, you all always ignore me and treat me like s---, now I will kill myself and you're coming with me, you will know the fear and suffering I feel everyday!" >chad says "not so fast, incel freak!" and expulses a ping pong ball at high speed out of his foreskin, conviniently hitting the guy's belt and thus letting his pants fall, showing that he was wearing women's underwear >everyone starts laughing and the incel ends up having a mental breakdown, saying things like "god no woman will ever love me, I condemned to solitude and pain". He finally blows his head withn a the gun and dies >the final panel shows chad being praised by a multitude saying "yay you saved us chad!" while he keeps doing tricks with his foreskin and the ping pong balls

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Anon figures out life | /r/Greentext

ttom] [Update] [ Auto] jng (18 KB, 389x389) IAnonymous 05/ >have "problem" >don't care >have no problem Life is literally so easy.
ttom] [Update] [ Auto] jng (18 KB, 389x389) IAnonymous 05/ >have "problem" >don't care >have no problem Life is literally so easy.

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