Greentext Stories - Images

Sorted By:

Anon finds out about kids humor in 2080 | /r/Greentext

>Be me, old f----- >Year 2080 >Grandkids come in >"Grandad look at this funny meme" >Proceeds to show me a glowing tesseract that sucks me in and makes me feel like I've just been imprisoned in a nightmarish hellscape for 10,000 years >falling through an endless tunnel of razorblades >bleeding out of every orifice >Ohgodmakeitstop >Ear-splitting noise and red light flashes before my eyes >l snap back to reality covered in sweat and vomit on the floor >"How funny is that Grandad Imaooo" >Mfw
>Be me, old f----- >Year 2080 >Grandkids come in >"Grandad look at this funny meme" >Proceeds to show me a glowing tesseract that sucks me in and makes me feel like I've just been imprisoned in a nightmarish hellscape for 10,000 years >falling through an endless tunnel of razorblades >bleeding out of every orifice >Ohgodmakeitstop >Ear-splitting noise and red light flashes before my eyes >l snap back to reality covered in sweat and vomit on the floor >"How funny is that Grandad Imaooo" >Mfw

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext human body jaw

Anon uses r/unpopularopinion | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/03/22(Thu)11:02:29 No.67639507 >go to r/unpopularopinion on reddit >post opinion >get told i'm an a------ by dozens of people and i should be a better person i'm literally using the subreddit correctly, why are people such 215 KB JPG morons there? Anonymous 03/03/22(Thu)11:10:26 No.67639579 >>67639507_(OP). Everyone knows r/unpopularopinions is not for actual unpopular opinions
Anonymous 03/03/22(Thu)11:02:29 No.67639507 >go to r/unpopularopinion on reddit >post opinion >get told i'm an a------ by dozens of people and i should be a better person i'm literally using the subreddit correctly, why are people such 215 KB JPG morons there? Anonymous 03/03/22(Thu)11:10:26 No.67639579 >>67639507_(OP). Everyone knows r/unpopularopinions is not for actual unpopular opinions

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext jaw organism liquid

Anon explains Family Feud | /r/Greentext

family feud time bois Anonymous 07/30/19(Tue)20:52:26 No.118860471 >>118860921 >Steve Harvey: "We asked 100 people, what is the male reproductive organ?" >Contestant: "The penis" >SH: "A WUH... HUH??" >audience erupts into laughter >Steve Harvey grabs onto podium to support himself >laughter gets even louder >SH: "O lordy..." >one man goes into cardiac arrest and many others begin vomiting profusely from laughing too hard >SH: "YOU PEOPLE NEED HELP" >the Earth shatters and Satan rises from the underworld to claim unworthy souls >the universe begins rapidly closing in on itself >SH: (putting on a weary voice) "Survey says..." >the board shows 100 for "penis" >Harvey is able to get off one more shocked look before existence as we know it comes to an end
family feud time bois Anonymous 07/30/19(Tue)20:52:26 No.118860471 >>118860921 >Steve Harvey: "We asked 100 people, what is the male reproductive organ?" >Contestant: "The penis" >SH: "A WUH... HUH??" >audience erupts into laughter >Steve Harvey grabs onto podium to support himself >laughter gets even louder >SH: "O lordy..." >one man goes into cardiac arrest and many others begin vomiting profusely from laughing too hard >SH: "YOU PEOPLE NEED HELP" >the Earth shatters and Satan rises from the underworld to claim unworthy souls >the universe begins rapidly closing in on itself >SH: (putting on a weary voice) "Survey says..." >the board shows 100 for "penis" >Harvey is able to get off one more shocked look before existence as we know it comes to an end

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon experiences Dutch culture | /r/Greentext

Anonymous N 02/23/22(Wed)17:57:05 No.160241908 >>160246545 >>160246850 >>160241207 >be a student >your retard roommate bakes a cake >"hey anon, want to try a slice of cheesecake I made?" :3 >accept the social opportunity for eating cheesecake >2 hours later >phone notification go brr >"Lena added a new cost for you: 1.74€ cheesecake"
Anonymous N 02/23/22(Wed)17:57:05 No.160241908 >>160246545 >>160246850 >>160241207 >be a student >your retard roommate bakes a cake >"hey anon, want to try a slice of cheesecake I made?" :3 >accept the social opportunity for eating cheesecake >2 hours later >phone notification go brr >"Lena added a new cost for you: 1.74€ cheesecake"

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon changes his mind | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon bonds with his father. | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 03/03/22(Thu)09:09:52 No.67635967 [Reply] >>67637509 >be me >dad asks what game i am constantly getting angry at >tell him it's war thunder >he played video games a lot, he doesn't have much time now because of work >says he's interested >teach him the ropes and such >he's actually pretty decent Ffw a few weeks later to now >1 am >dad is upstairs playing war thunder >desk slamming and "f------ b-------" >mfw now he's getting angry at the game
O Anonymous 03/03/22(Thu)09:09:52 No.67635967 [Reply] >>67637509 >be me >dad asks what game i am constantly getting angry at >tell him it's war thunder >he played video games a lot, he doesn't have much time now because of work >says he's interested >teach him the ropes and such >he's actually pretty decent Ffw a few weeks later to now >1 am >dad is upstairs playing war thunder >desk slamming and "f------ b-------" >mfw now he's getting angry at the game

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext human organism gesture terrestrial plant font

Anon realizes something | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: OTHL2Z8P When you 03/03/22(Thu)05:47:29 No.364844395 > Invade a Nation Illegally > Get your entire country Sanctioned >Get your Oligarch Sanctioned >Loose your Black Belt > Get Soccer Team Kicked out 729 KB JPG of FIFA > Get Banned by Judo Association > Drop 40% of value of countries Currency > Get Condemned by your neighbors > Get asked to not invade until after Olympics because not even China wants to be associated with this > Get Kicked off SWIFT > Banned from Visa and MasterCard > Threaten the whole world that you bomb them But some how you shills will ignore all this and still think you don't look like a complete idiot . Who would want to be associated with this guy, he basically f----- up 2 countries in 1 week.
: Anonymous (ID: OTHL2Z8P When you 03/03/22(Thu)05:47:29 No.364844395 > Invade a Nation Illegally > Get your entire country Sanctioned >Get your Oligarch Sanctioned >Loose your Black Belt > Get Soccer Team Kicked out 729 KB JPG of FIFA > Get Banned by Judo Association > Drop 40% of value of countries Currency > Get Condemned by your neighbors > Get asked to not invade until after Olympics because not even China wants to be associated with this > Get Kicked off SWIFT > Banned from Visa and MasterCard > Threaten the whole world that you bomb them But some how you shills will ignore all this and still think you don't look like a complete idiot . Who would want to be associated with this guy, he basically f----- up 2 countries in 1 week.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font tie

Anon has a mom | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/24/22(Thu)21:13:20 No.873328990 >ok s--- story for you >grow up with super doting and loving mother >as a kid I resent it and push her away >never let her hug me or anything >always cold to her >at 17 I realized I was being a d--- and apologized and made up 676 KB PNG >in my 20s developed a mommydom fetish >learn that a mommy fetish is usually caused by a lack of affection from a mother figure >f------ duped myself View Thread
: Anonymous 02/24/22(Thu)21:13:20 No.873328990 >ok s--- story for you >grow up with super doting and loving mother >as a kid I resent it and push her away >never let her hug me or anything >always cold to her >at 17 I realized I was being a d--- and apologized and made up 676 KB PNG >in my 20s developed a mommydom fetish >learn that a mommy fetish is usually caused by a lack of affection from a mother figure >f------ duped myself View Thread

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism font

Anon's future self | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/30/18(Fri)02:01:13 No.786131855 When the age of consent is finally abolished in 30 years, what is the first thing you will do? 440 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/30/18(Fri)02:02:46 No.786131943 >>786131855 (OP) # protect my daughter from degenerates like you and then f--- her >>786131988 # >>786132853 #
: Anonymous 11/30/18(Fri)02:01:13 No.786131855 When the age of consent is finally abolished in 30 years, what is the first thing you will do? 440 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/30/18(Fri)02:02:46 No.786131943 >>786131855 (OP) # protect my daughter from degenerates like you and then f--- her >>786131988 # >>786132853 #

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon is Brazilian | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/03/22(Thu)00:12:36 No.873701781 >be me >Brazilian >wake up next to my 16 siblings >hear rain outside >"time for my weekly shower!" >walk outside only to get shot in the head and ran over by 3 motorcycles 27 KB PNG best day in weeks.
: Anonymous 03/03/22(Thu)00:12:36 No.873701781 >be me >Brazilian >wake up next to my 16 siblings >hear rain outside >"time for my weekly shower!" >walk outside only to get shot in the head and ran over by 3 motorcycles 27 KB PNG best day in weeks.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon cares | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/02/22(Wed)21:03:48 No.873692729 >be me >5 minutes ago >finished my sewing project >mom is watching Netflix kdrama on the couch >look what I did ma >shut up anon I can't read the 7 KB PNG subtitles >l'm feeling sad rn bros : Anonymous 03/02/22(Wed)21:04:58 No.873692790 >>873692729 (OP) # it's okay fren. Im proud of you. 484 KB PNG
: Anonymous 03/02/22(Wed)21:03:48 No.873692729 >be me >5 minutes ago >finished my sewing project >mom is watching Netflix kdrama on the couch >look what I did ma >shut up anon I can't read the 7 KB PNG subtitles >l'm feeling sad rn bros : Anonymous 03/02/22(Wed)21:04:58 No.873692790 >>873692729 (OP) # it's okay fren. Im proud of you. 484 KB PNG

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon is unwinding | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon's an e-girl | /r/Greentext

>be me >be bored >create fake profile as a 15 year old girl >use photos of myself dressed as a trap >lure pedos > TCAP. exe >one of them actually falls in love with my pics > calls me his "pretty lady" >idea. mp3 Well daddy the why don't you send your pretty lady some cash through pay pal so i can send u more pics >he complies >mfw he sends 50 bucks >mfw im an e girl
>be me >be bored >create fake profile as a 15 year old girl >use photos of myself dressed as a trap >lure pedos > TCAP. exe >one of them actually falls in love with my pics > calls me his "pretty lady" >idea. mp3 Well daddy the why don't you send your pretty lady some cash through pay pal so i can send u more pics >he complies >mfw he sends 50 bucks >mfw im an e girl

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext gesture terrestrial plant happy

Happy anon. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/13/20(Sun)18:54:51 No.613 >l post the frog >they see the frog and get mad >they say mean things to me >l get sad >i want to feel happy again >frog makes me happy >l post the frog 61 KB JPG
Anonymous 12/13/20(Sun)18:54:51 No.613 >l post the frog >they see the frog and get mad >they say mean things to me >l get sad >i want to feel happy again >frog makes me happy >l post the frog 61 KB JPG

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism rectangle font

Anon starts his career | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Why are people like this | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/26/21(Mon)22:35:28 No.853060753 >Be me black >Be Lightskin >See dumb post on twitter saying cops shouldn't stop black fights >Respond saying thats dumb >Get called a racist 24 KB JPG >Respond saying i'm black myself >She asks for a pic of my arm with a piece of paper with my twitter name >Send her said picture >Get told that I don't look black >Respond saying i'm lightskin >She legit says "Then your not actually black, You have more white genes >Tell her both of my parents are African American >She says they aren't black either >She blocks me after. Why are people like this
: Anonymous 04/26/21(Mon)22:35:28 No.853060753 >Be me black >Be Lightskin >See dumb post on twitter saying cops shouldn't stop black fights >Respond saying thats dumb >Get called a racist 24 KB JPG >Respond saying i'm black myself >She asks for a pic of my arm with a piece of paper with my twitter name >Send her said picture >Get told that I don't look black >Respond saying i'm lightskin >She legit says "Then your not actually black, You have more white genes >Tell her both of my parents are African American >She says they aren't black either >She blocks me after. Why are people like this

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant

Smartest 4chan user | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/21/16(Mon)11:10:07 No.27303759 Why don't they make bulletproof vests out of diamond if it is the hardest metal? 5 KB JPG : Anonymous 03/21/16(Mon)11:11:28 No.27303774 Cause it's too heavy. 1 gram of diamond weighs something like 15 grams. >>27303789 # >>27303795 # >>27303892 # >>27303924 # >>27304023 # >27304509 # igram igram weighs something like 15 grams.
: Anonymous 03/21/16(Mon)11:10:07 No.27303759 Why don't they make bulletproof vests out of diamond if it is the hardest metal? 5 KB JPG : Anonymous 03/21/16(Mon)11:11:28 No.27303774 Cause it's too heavy. 1 gram of diamond weighs something like 15 grams. >>27303789 # >>27303795 # >>27303892 # >>27303924 # >>27304023 # >27304509 # igram igram weighs something like 15 grams.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Very useful advice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)18:58:16 No.858512914 >roommate asks me to drive him to his dealer >sure, I have nothing going on >get in, start the car, put on seatbelt >notice roommate doesn't have his 8 KB JPG seatbelt on >ask him to put it on >"Why? Aren't you a good driver?" >tell him it's my car andI want him to have his seatbelt on >"lol f--- you man just drive" >okay >get on the road, accelerate to 40mph >slam on the brakes >roommate flies out of his seat, his face hits the windshield >oh s---, sorry bro. Maybe you should put your f------ seatbelt on >he does >I turn the car around and drive us back home F------ f----- can walk to his dealer's now. Wear your seatbelts.
: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)18:58:16 No.858512914 >roommate asks me to drive him to his dealer >sure, I have nothing going on >get in, start the car, put on seatbelt >notice roommate doesn't have his 8 KB JPG seatbelt on >ask him to put it on >"Why? Aren't you a good driver?" >tell him it's my car andI want him to have his seatbelt on >"lol f--- you man just drive" >okay >get on the road, accelerate to 40mph >slam on the brakes >roommate flies out of his seat, his face hits the windshield >oh s---, sorry bro. Maybe you should put your f------ seatbelt on >he does >I turn the car around and drive us back home F------ f----- can walk to his dealer's now. Wear your seatbelts.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon has backpain | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/02/22(Wed)23:07:52 No.873677303 >have random back pain, probably from sitting wrong >bad at googling so I go on reddit to ask for advice on how to fix it >the medical question sub asks you to 199 KB JPG state your general stats to save time, age weight and gender etc >do it because l'd gain nothing from being banned >instead of helping they start roasting me for being a 5'6, 120lbs grown-ass man
: Anonymous 03/02/22(Wed)23:07:52 No.873677303 >have random back pain, probably from sitting wrong >bad at googling so I go on reddit to ask for advice on how to fix it >the medical question sub asks you to 199 KB JPG state your general stats to save time, age weight and gender etc >do it because l'd gain nothing from being banned >instead of helping they start roasting me for being a 5'6, 120lbs grown-ass man

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext jaw organism terrestrial plant font

Anon prepares for the future | /r/Greentext

1618542645521.jpg 39 KB JPG >>80645680 # >every morning I break out of my house >every night I break in >l do not sleep >l only repair the damage and perfect my defenses >l hunger for the day that I am either entombed forever or effectively exiled from my own house
1618542645521.jpg 39 KB JPG >>80645680 # >every morning I break out of my house >every night I break in >l do not sleep >l only repair the damage and perfect my defenses >l hunger for the day that I am either entombed forever or effectively exiled from my own house

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext nose hair skin head hand eyebrow eyelash mouth organ human jaw gesture finger thumb font