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Anon and UV-light | /r/Greentext

>rat problem >practically pulling out hair to solve it >spent over $200 on traps and poisons (rats eventually learn to avoid them) >one recent purchase was a uv 27 KB PNG flashlight specifically marketed for detecting animals >highlights rat piss and poo traces >actually pretty cool >been shining it all over the house, and softly giggling at various "discoveries" >feeling like csi:autism >call friends to come over and play with it >they like it too >shining it all over the house and having a laugh >"hey anon, let's try your room!" >"wait, no!" >sudden flash of light that didn't even take half a second to form >it was like someone denonated a fatboy in there >tfw had to sit over their friends' lying bodies, tending to them until their vision returned
>rat problem >practically pulling out hair to solve it >spent over $200 on traps and poisons (rats eventually learn to avoid them) >one recent purchase was a uv 27 KB PNG flashlight specifically marketed for detecting animals >highlights rat piss and poo traces >actually pretty cool >been shining it all over the house, and softly giggling at various "discoveries" >feeling like csi:autism >call friends to come over and play with it >they like it too >shining it all over the house and having a laugh >"hey anon, let's try your room!" >"wait, no!" >sudden flash of light that didn't even take half a second to form >it was like someone denonated a fatboy in there >tfw had to sit over their friends' lying bodies, tending to them until their vision returned

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Anon is relieved | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)18:24:44 No.67830599 >d--- gets hard if it's s------/ladyboy/trap/sissy as long as it looks female enough >d--- won't get hard if it's muscular or manly man thank god I'm still straight 37 KB JPG
: Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)18:24:44 No.67830599 >d--- gets hard if it's s------/ladyboy/trap/sissy as long as it looks female enough >d--- won't get hard if it's muscular or manly man thank god I'm still straight 37 KB JPG

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Anon fell for the attic shit meme | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/21/19(Thu)22:31:43 No.51572664 >fell for the throw your s--- in the attic meme >tfw parents are p-----, the damage costs a fortune to fix, and the smell isn't going away 71 KB JPG My parents are thinking of kicking me out. I'm seriously scared. : Anonymous 03/21/19(Thu)22:33:08 No.51572686 >>51572664 (OP) # .what are you talking about? what meme? >>51572723 # Anonymous 03/21/19(Thu)22:35:37 No.51572723 >>51572686 # So you don't have to leave your room to s---, and so you don'thave to go in jugs, you can throw it in the attic. I have a little trap door to the attic in my closet. I threw my s--- up in there and you said squirrels will carry it away but they haven't it just builds up and damages the house.
: Anonymous 03/21/19(Thu)22:31:43 No.51572664 >fell for the throw your s--- in the attic meme >tfw parents are p-----, the damage costs a fortune to fix, and the smell isn't going away 71 KB JPG My parents are thinking of kicking me out. I'm seriously scared. : Anonymous 03/21/19(Thu)22:33:08 No.51572686 >>51572664 (OP) # .what are you talking about? what meme? >>51572723 # Anonymous 03/21/19(Thu)22:35:37 No.51572723 >>51572686 # So you don't have to leave your room to s---, and so you don'thave to go in jugs, you can throw it in the attic. I have a little trap door to the attic in my closet. I threw my s--- up in there and you said squirrels will carry it away but they haven't it just builds up and damages the house.

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Le good idea | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: SwdH/sCX 03/18/22(Fri)06:42:41 No.367899010 38B13E99-CBCC-4A85-894C-66A357D3737E.png 110 KB PNG >Ukraine says they will arm anyone who wants to fight >le good idea >go to Ukraine >get ak >leave It's that simple
: Anonymous (ID: SwdH/sCX 03/18/22(Fri)06:42:41 No.367899010 38B13E99-CBCC-4A85-894C-66A357D3737E.png 110 KB PNG >Ukraine says they will arm anyone who wants to fight >le good idea >go to Ukraine >get ak >leave It's that simple

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Anon makes a thread | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/24/20(Tue)20:01:23 No.9231307 >make thread >no one replies >pull out my phone and reply to my thread 31 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/24/20(Tue)20:04:06 No.9231311 totally man haha good thread dude >>9231316 #
: Anonymous 11/24/20(Tue)20:01:23 No.9231307 >make thread >no one replies >pull out my phone and reply to my thread 31 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/24/20(Tue)20:04:06 No.9231311 totally man haha good thread dude >>9231316 #

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Anon didn’t act only in accordance with that maxim through which he could at the same time will that it become a universal law | /r/Greentext

My mom started an OnlyFans account. I have no idea why. It's not like we need the money. Dad was in the tech sector and made lots of investments before he passed so we're very financially stable. 40 KB JPG She posted about it for all the family and friends to see. I confronted her and based my arguments against her actions in Kant's Categorical Imperative. After half an hour she still wasn't understanding the concept and was just in tears that I wasn't being supportive. I told her alright look, imagine things in terms of universal actions. So you should consider whether the act of subscribing to your OnlyFans is something you'd want to see all men in the world undertake, i.e. me, your own son. Obviously this renders it immoral since it fails Kant's Categorical Imperative. Now she just thinks I'm trying to make an elaborate argument that justifies me subscribing to her OnlyFans because I'm a perv and she's starts crying whenever she sees me. She's threatened that I'll have to move out but I think it's a bluff. I'm giving up on invoking the Categorical Imperative and need some other moral arguments. Unfortunately I've spent the last 7 years of my life pretty much exclusively reading Kant and secondary sources on Kant, so I don't really have a good grasp of non-Kantian morality. Any help would be appreciated.
My mom started an OnlyFans account. I have no idea why. It's not like we need the money. Dad was in the tech sector and made lots of investments before he passed so we're very financially stable. 40 KB JPG She posted about it for all the family and friends to see. I confronted her and based my arguments against her actions in Kant's Categorical Imperative. After half an hour she still wasn't understanding the concept and was just in tears that I wasn't being supportive. I told her alright look, imagine things in terms of universal actions. So you should consider whether the act of subscribing to your OnlyFans is something you'd want to see all men in the world undertake, i.e. me, your own son. Obviously this renders it immoral since it fails Kant's Categorical Imperative. Now she just thinks I'm trying to make an elaborate argument that justifies me subscribing to her OnlyFans because I'm a perv and she's starts crying whenever she sees me. She's threatened that I'll have to move out but I think it's a bluff. I'm giving up on invoking the Categorical Imperative and need some other moral arguments. Unfortunately I've spent the last 7 years of my life pretty much exclusively reading Kant and secondary sources on Kant, so I don't really have a good grasp of non-Kantian morality. Any help would be appreciated.

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Anon cannot top | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/12/21 (Tue)15:30:42 No.65731923 >Make dating app account >Heterosexual, show to women >3 likes, no matches in a week >Disappointed by curious, switch to males >70 likes in an 2 hours 345 KB PNG There was nothing wrong with me, female standards became so insane they beyond self- parody right now.
: Anonymous 10/12/21 (Tue)15:30:42 No.65731923 >Make dating app account >Heterosexual, show to women >3 likes, no matches in a week >Disappointed by curious, switch to males >70 likes in an 2 hours 345 KB PNG There was nothing wrong with me, female standards became so insane they beyond self- parody right now.

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Normie depression | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/03/21(Wed)02:50:06 No.62574709 >show its called Mr.Robot >its supposed to be about a depressed guy with social anxiety >has a well paid job >has a female best friend >has a chad friend that wants to 377 KB JPG hang out with him >has sex with a female drugs dealer in the first chapter >after sex scene they put some scene of him crying and saying muh loneliness and anxiety so this is how depression looks like for normies
: Anonymous 03/03/21(Wed)02:50:06 No.62574709 >show its called Mr.Robot >its supposed to be about a depressed guy with social anxiety >has a well paid job >has a female best friend >has a chad friend that wants to 377 KB JPG hang out with him >has sex with a female drugs dealer in the first chapter >after sex scene they put some scene of him crying and saying muh loneliness and anxiety so this is how depression looks like for normies

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Anon is an NPC | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/10/21 (Mon)07:51:26 No.63603986 >At work >Known at work as the guy who collects lighters >Coworker gives me a lighter he found >"Aw nice, thanks bro." >Opinion of that person went up in 624 KB PNG my mind >Think about it later that day >Realize I'm a 'collect x amount of y" npc >mfw
: Anonymous 05/10/21 (Mon)07:51:26 No.63603986 >At work >Known at work as the guy who collects lighters >Coworker gives me a lighter he found >"Aw nice, thanks bro." >Opinion of that person went up in 624 KB PNG my mind >Think about it later that day >Realize I'm a 'collect x amount of y" npc >mfw

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Anon is resourceful | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 03/17/22(Thu)16:35:47 No.67818979 File: 1622154845245.png (143 KB, 500x500) >>67815896 (OP) >26 >picked up a hundred dollar bill from the ground, super lucky! >guy rushes in >"Has anyone seen any cash laying on the ground?! I might have dropped it" >panic, I really want the money to pay parking tickets >point to a black guy leaving >"I saw that guy pick something up a while ago, idk what though" >leave quickly as the guy chases down the black man
O Anonymous 03/17/22(Thu)16:35:47 No.67818979 File: 1622154845245.png (143 KB, 500x500) >>67815896 (OP) >26 >picked up a hundred dollar bill from the ground, super lucky! >guy rushes in >"Has anyone seen any cash laying on the ground?! I might have dropped it" >panic, I really want the money to pay parking tickets >point to a black guy leaving >"I saw that guy pick something up a while ago, idk what though" >leave quickly as the guy chases down the black man

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Sigma mindset | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)09:35:13 No.67566802 A girl approaches you and says, "pretend we're friends. l'm being followed." What would you do? ASKMEN r 75 KB PNG 47 Replies / 5 Images View Thread : Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)14:09:18 No.67568442 >>67566802 (OP) # I'd tell them >you are not entitled to male protection It's that simple
: Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)09:35:13 No.67566802 A girl approaches you and says, "pretend we're friends. l'm being followed." What would you do? ASKMEN r 75 KB PNG 47 Replies / 5 Images View Thread : Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)14:09:18 No.67568442 >>67566802 (OP) # I'd tell them >you are not entitled to male protection It's that simple

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Anon got cucked by an aardvark. | /r/Greentext

I Anonymous 10/25/18(Thu)11:33:05 No.436422052 motherFUCKEERRRR.png 2.26 MB PNG >middle of my birthday party >Arthur comes on tv >every f------ kid goes to watch it >Hey guys, don't you wanna play, guys? >No, we're watching Arthur F--- you Arthur, you p------------ >>436424116 # >>436424232 #
I Anonymous 10/25/18(Thu)11:33:05 No.436422052 motherFUCKEERRRR.png 2.26 MB PNG >middle of my birthday party >Arthur comes on tv >every f------ kid goes to watch it >Hey guys, don't you wanna play, guys? >No, we're watching Arthur F--- you Arthur, you p------------ >>436424116 # >>436424232 #

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Anon fell for it | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/09/17(Thu)23:06:28 No.8666680 363 KB JPG Bought baby spinach for the first time. About 70% of the leaves felt like rubber. Why did they feel like rubber? Anonymous 03/09/17(Thu)23:15:29 No.8666720 >>8666680 (OP) >he fell for the rubber spinach Oldest trick in the book.
Anonymous 03/09/17(Thu)23:06:28 No.8666680 363 KB JPG Bought baby spinach for the first time. About 70% of the leaves felt like rubber. Why did they feel like rubber? Anonymous 03/09/17(Thu)23:15:29 No.8666720 >>8666680 (OP) >he fell for the rubber spinach Oldest trick in the book.

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Anon is improving | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 45243472 >be me >22 yo >overweight beta loser >decide to f--- it all and get my life in control >get new clothes >go to the gym >work out harder than ever in my life >sweat dripping off me >can't feel my legs >a couple of chads walk by >hear one of them say to the other >"What a fat loser" 42,2 kB JPG >... >He's technically right >l am losing a lot of fat 3 REPLIES O IMAGES REPLY Anonymous 45243502 Nice keep going man
Anonymous | 45243472 >be me >22 yo >overweight beta loser >decide to f--- it all and get my life in control >get new clothes >go to the gym >work out harder than ever in my life >sweat dripping off me >can't feel my legs >a couple of chads walk by >hear one of them say to the other >"What a fat loser" 42,2 kB JPG >... >He's technically right >l am losing a lot of fat 3 REPLIES O IMAGES REPLY Anonymous 45243502 Nice keep going man

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Anon is the First Lady. | /r/Greentext

File: First lady jpg (30 KB, 348x527) O Anonymous (ID: 3LETK53W 2 01/20/17(Fri)12:59:42 No. 108047628 [Reply] >be me >literal gold digger >just want a nice life without having to work >marry rich guy just for the cash >he's upset with the state of the country >decides to run for president >yeahright.jpeg >he starts doing well >mfw he actually gets elected >mfw I'm the first lady of the United states of America
File: First lady jpg (30 KB, 348x527) O Anonymous (ID: 3LETK53W 2 01/20/17(Fri)12:59:42 No. 108047628 [Reply] >be me >literal gold digger >just want a nice life without having to work >marry rich guy just for the cash >he's upset with the state of the country >decides to run for president >yeahright.jpeg >he starts doing well >mfw he actually gets elected >mfw I'm the first lady of the United states of America

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Chad Anon all ze way.. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/02/21(Mon)16:57:07 No.860215884 >Read 314 pages of terms and conditions >Clicked 'disagree' 1.09 MB GIF
: Anonymous 08/02/21(Mon)16:57:07 No.860215884 >Read 314 pages of terms and conditions >Clicked 'disagree' 1.09 MB GIF

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Anon is playing life on hard mode | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Everyone ends up leaving me 03/17/22(Thu)20:34:18 No.67825659 >mother abandons me at 5 >dad abandons me at 12 >grandma dies at 17 >friends all move on and stop talking to me after high school >online friends all end up ghosting 1.06 MB PNG me >meet one lonely girl a year ago online, just as friends >become very close >she makes a post on a dating subreddit 2 weeks ago >ghosted me since, i suppose she was just using me for attention and now she found a boyfriend Back to square one for me. I'm just a ghost, an invisible guy. 8 Replies / 3 Images View Thread
: Anonymous Everyone ends up leaving me 03/17/22(Thu)20:34:18 No.67825659 >mother abandons me at 5 >dad abandons me at 12 >grandma dies at 17 >friends all move on and stop talking to me after high school >online friends all end up ghosting 1.06 MB PNG me >meet one lonely girl a year ago online, just as friends >become very close >she makes a post on a dating subreddit 2 weeks ago >ghosted me since, i suppose she was just using me for attention and now she found a boyfriend Back to square one for me. I'm just a ghost, an invisible guy. 8 Replies / 3 Images View Thread

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Tables have been turned for Anon. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous No.26583677 10 hours ago How about a /devilish/ thread? >At uni >Girl calls me a loser >over the line >Find her facebook >She has a boyfriend >Everything is public >Perfect >Save her pictures, learn her interests >Make an okcupid account >Fill it out with her info >Interact with others a little >Make a fake Chad facebook account >Message her boyfriend >"Hey bro sorry to bring this up but I was on okcupid and I do google searches of my dates, found your gf on it. Thought I should let you know." >bf messages me back "wow dude thanks for telling me." >A few days later check her facebook >Relationship: Single. Who is the loser now?
Anonymous No.26583677 10 hours ago How about a /devilish/ thread? >At uni >Girl calls me a loser >over the line >Find her facebook >She has a boyfriend >Everything is public >Perfect >Save her pictures, learn her interests >Make an okcupid account >Fill it out with her info >Interact with others a little >Make a fake Chad facebook account >Message her boyfriend >"Hey bro sorry to bring this up but I was on okcupid and I do google searches of my dates, found your gf on it. Thought I should let you know." >bf messages me back "wow dude thanks for telling me." >A few days later check her facebook >Relationship: Single. Who is the loser now?

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Anon’s have spoken | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/11/19(Fri)10:29:51 No.789716987 >ls a gamer >Helps working class people >Seems like a genuinely nice person to be around >Doesn't take corp. money 6 KB JPG >Sexy as hell what's not to like about our progressive gamer queen? : Anonymous 01/11/19(Fri)10:31:27 No.789717088 she's a jew >>789717298 #
: Anonymous 01/11/19(Fri)10:29:51 No.789716987 >ls a gamer >Helps working class people >Seems like a genuinely nice person to be around >Doesn't take corp. money 6 KB JPG >Sexy as hell what's not to like about our progressive gamer queen? : Anonymous 01/11/19(Fri)10:31:27 No.789717088 she's a jew >>789717298 #

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anon doesn't care about poverty | /r/Greentext

Anonymous E 03/16/22(Wed)21:32:38 No.16145985 >>161459873 >>161459882 >>161459943 >>161460014 >>16146 >>161460686 >>161460862 >>161461789 >be poor >be depressed >be happy because mother loves me
Anonymous E 03/16/22(Wed)21:32:38 No.16145985 >>161459873 >>161459882 >>161459943 >>161460014 >>16146 >>161460686 >>161460862 >>161461789 >be poor >be depressed >be happy because mother loves me

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