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Anon can’t think straight | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous06/07/17(Wed)22:27:04 No.37570730 >really hot girl in class >decide to work up the courage to speak to her >"H-hey.. c-can I borrow your pen for a second?" >she hands me her pen >realize I dont even have 24 KB JPG paper to write on >shes staring at me >My mind is racing what to do >Draw a penis on my hand >give her back her pen and walk away
: Anonymous06/07/17(Wed)22:27:04 No.37570730 >really hot girl in class >decide to work up the courage to speak to her >"H-hey.. c-can I borrow your pen for a second?" >she hands me her pen >realize I dont even have 24 KB JPG paper to write on >shes staring at me >My mind is racing what to do >Draw a penis on my hand >give her back her pen and walk away

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Anon wtf.. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)18:57:42 No.857446821 >be me, 28 year old Texas f-- >live in Corpus Christi >love it here but city has a bad homeless problem >get sick of it and take matters into my own hands 272 KB JPG >last week find a hobo walking through grocery store parking lot in morning >strike up conversation and befriend him >offer to pay him $200 if he helps me move furniture out of my house in Austin >he agrees >l don't have house in Austin >we go to Austin, ~4 hour drive >he gets out to use bathroom in gas station in random ghetto >I leave him and drive back to corpus Is relocating the homeless to s--- cities the answer we've been looking for? I think next weekend I'm gonna pick up 3 hobos and leave them in Dallas
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)18:57:42 No.857446821 >be me, 28 year old Texas f-- >live in Corpus Christi >love it here but city has a bad homeless problem >get sick of it and take matters into my own hands 272 KB JPG >last week find a hobo walking through grocery store parking lot in morning >strike up conversation and befriend him >offer to pay him $200 if he helps me move furniture out of my house in Austin >he agrees >l don't have house in Austin >we go to Austin, ~4 hour drive >he gets out to use bathroom in gas station in random ghetto >I leave him and drive back to corpus Is relocating the homeless to s--- cities the answer we've been looking for? I think next weekend I'm gonna pick up 3 hobos and leave them in Dallas

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Absolute movie | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/11/21(Thu)16:30:14 No.159019347 the last airbender.png 356 KB PNG >Show up in film industry when nobody was asking for you >Become highest grossing film of all time >Promise a million sequels and deliver zero >Leave >Show up a decade later just to cuck Marvel out of getting highest grossing movie >Leave again >Nobody remembers a single line of dialogue
: Anonymous 11/11/21(Thu)16:30:14 No.159019347 the last airbender.png 356 KB PNG >Show up in film industry when nobody was asking for you >Become highest grossing film of all time >Promise a million sequels and deliver zero >Leave >Show up a decade later just to cuck Marvel out of getting highest grossing movie >Leave again >Nobody remembers a single line of dialogue

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Anons dad should have stopped drinking | /r/Greentext


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Anon needs help | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: pvkNTfOo ) 04/04/ >neighbor found out im a nazi now what?
Anonymous (ID: pvkNTfOo ) 04/04/ >neighbor found out im a nazi now what?

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Doctors hate anon for this one simple trick | /r/Greentext

File: d8og2uv-96b2cc0d-9281-4f3(.).jpg (39 KB, 640x818) O fatties btfo Anonymous > Eat only when hungry > Thin Literally this easy.
File: d8og2uv-96b2cc0d-9281-4f3(.).jpg (39 KB, 640x818) O fatties btfo Anonymous > Eat only when hungry > Thin Literally this easy.

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Anon shares a link | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/04/22(Mon)20:07:25 No.875707823 Hey guys, there's this really cool website I found. It's called 4chan. You're gonna love it. https://www.4chan.org/ 802 KB GIF 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 04/04/22(Mon)20:10:02 No.875707947 >>875707823 (OP) # I don't like it.
: Anonymous 04/04/22(Mon)20:07:25 No.875707823 Hey guys, there's this really cool website I found. It's called 4chan. You're gonna love it. https://www.4chan.org/ 802 KB GIF 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 04/04/22(Mon)20:10:02 No.875707947 >>875707823 (OP) # I don't like it.

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anon doesn't get no b****** no more | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Women's pickiness 04/04/22(Mon)17:23:58 No.68066830 2015 >you pull girls from the Internet daily with no effort 2020 >you get a couple of matches on dating apps 948 KB GIF 2022 >zero matches after 4 weeks of swiping Yeah sure, keep telling me how it's just that I've suddenly gotten incredibly old and it's not that women's demands have been bumped up to 11. Bro I've lost weight and gotten fit and now I get less women.
: Anonymous Women's pickiness 04/04/22(Mon)17:23:58 No.68066830 2015 >you pull girls from the Internet daily with no effort 2020 >you get a couple of matches on dating apps 948 KB GIF 2022 >zero matches after 4 weeks of swiping Yeah sure, keep telling me how it's just that I've suddenly gotten incredibly old and it's not that women's demands have been bumped up to 11. Bro I've lost weight and gotten fit and now I get less women.

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anon makes coffee | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/04/22(Mon)18:01:09 No.68067237 >> Puts soap in coffee machine >> Coffee tastes like soap how? 198 KB PNG
: Anonymous 04/04/22(Mon)18:01:09 No.68067237 >> Puts soap in coffee machine >> Coffee tastes like soap how? 198 KB PNG

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Anon reveals he's a virgin | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/04/22(Fri)17:11:04 No.234946126 >girl ask me what im doing in my free time >say i read >she smiles and stares at me with her eyes wide open >i mumble "... manga" the look of dissapointment in her face was unspeakable but i think you know 77 KB JPG
: Anonymous 03/04/22(Fri)17:11:04 No.234946126 >girl ask me what im doing in my free time >say i read >she smiles and stares at me with her eyes wide open >i mumble "... manga" the look of dissapointment in her face was unspeakable but i think you know 77 KB JPG

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Anon is gonna die | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)00:26:09 No.875695415 >just found a date on tinder >we're gonna go bike riding in the middle of the desert in the middle of the night See ya virgins I'm about to drown in 571 KB JPG p----
: Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)00:26:09 No.875695415 >just found a date on tinder >we're gonna go bike riding in the middle of the desert in the middle of the night See ya virgins I'm about to drown in 571 KB JPG p----

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anon thinks he may be autistic | /r/Greentext


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Anon should reap what he sows | /r/Greentext


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Anon has a bright idea | /r/Greentext


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Anon doesn't believe in fishing | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/02/22(Sat)05:27:39 No.4122096 >put a piece of metal and some string in a lake >wait a few minutes >it comes back out with a fish do fishers really believe this s---? 727 KB PNG : Anonymous 04/02/22(Sat)05:29:49 No.4122098 >>4122096 (OP) # > no guys trust me, we just saw a worm floating in the water > then matt just disappeared into the sky What fish would believe this s--- LOL >>4122103 #
: Anonymous 04/02/22(Sat)05:27:39 No.4122096 >put a piece of metal and some string in a lake >wait a few minutes >it comes back out with a fish do fishers really believe this s---? 727 KB PNG : Anonymous 04/02/22(Sat)05:29:49 No.4122098 >>4122096 (OP) # > no guys trust me, we just saw a worm floating in the water > then matt just disappeared into the sky What fish would believe this s--- LOL >>4122103 #

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anon is most of us | /r/Greentext


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Anon is antisocial | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/23/22(Wed)01:53:33 No.67898824 >4 year of univeristy >not a single friend made 25 KB GIF 5 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 03/23/22(Wed)01:53:33 No.67898824 >4 year of univeristy >not a single friend made 25 KB GIF 5 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon is special | /r/Greentext


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Anon is one sharp-looking fella | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I F----- up 04/01/22(Fri)23:13:33 No.16921855 I went to a new barber this because he was cheaper and almost had just as good reviews on Google. I showed him this picture and asked for the same f------ haircut. 51 KB JPG : Anonymous 04/01/22(Fri)23:14:02 No.16921856 A98E757F-OB39-445D-BODB-A87C9690E4B4.jpg 394 KB JPG This is what he ended up giving me >>16921858 # >>16921876 # >>16921881 # >>16921886 # >>16921964 # >>16922025 # >>16922028 # >>16922060 # >>16922101 # >>16922246 # >>16922247 # >>16922276 # >>16922282 # >>16922541 # >>16922564 # >>16922655 # >>16922669 # >>16922756 # >>16922805 # >>16922818 # >>16922848 # >>16922935 # >>16923164 # >>16923173 # >>16923175 # >>16923551 # >>16925868 # >>16925942 # >>16925983 # >>16926949 # >>16928539 #
: Anonymous I F----- up 04/01/22(Fri)23:13:33 No.16921855 I went to a new barber this because he was cheaper and almost had just as good reviews on Google. I showed him this picture and asked for the same f------ haircut. 51 KB JPG : Anonymous 04/01/22(Fri)23:14:02 No.16921856 A98E757F-OB39-445D-BODB-A87C9690E4B4.jpg 394 KB JPG This is what he ended up giving me >>16921858 # >>16921876 # >>16921881 # >>16921886 # >>16921964 # >>16922025 # >>16922028 # >>16922060 # >>16922101 # >>16922246 # >>16922247 # >>16922276 # >>16922282 # >>16922541 # >>16922564 # >>16922655 # >>16922669 # >>16922756 # >>16922805 # >>16922818 # >>16922848 # >>16922935 # >>16923164 # >>16923173 # >>16923175 # >>16923551 # >>16925868 # >>16925942 # >>16925983 # >>16926949 # >>16928539 #

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Anon has protection | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)20:44:00 No.857076209 >be 2nd grade teacher >school is in low-income, high- crime neighborhood >one of my kids often gets picked up by his grandpa >grandpa is an OG who used to be a gangbanger in the 80s, spent 1.19 MB JPG some time in prison, and got his s--- together >he's big and scary-looking, but super f------ nice >leave the school after working late one day, some dudes walk up to me and ask what time it is >look down at my watch and one of them sucker punches me >try to fight back but it's 3-on-1 >get my watch, phone, and wallet taken >next day during dismissal >students grandpa notices bruises, asks what the hell happened >oh I got jumped by some guys on my way home >he asks what they looked like >don't know but I remember they drove away in a white Camaro >he nods and says okay >about a week later, student comes back and hands me a plastic bag from his backpack >inside is my phone, wallet, and watch >see a news report a few months later about a white Camaro found at the bottom of a nearby lake >owner is still missing
: Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)20:44:00 No.857076209 >be 2nd grade teacher >school is in low-income, high- crime neighborhood >one of my kids often gets picked up by his grandpa >grandpa is an OG who used to be a gangbanger in the 80s, spent 1.19 MB JPG some time in prison, and got his s--- together >he's big and scary-looking, but super f------ nice >leave the school after working late one day, some dudes walk up to me and ask what time it is >look down at my watch and one of them sucker punches me >try to fight back but it's 3-on-1 >get my watch, phone, and wallet taken >next day during dismissal >students grandpa notices bruises, asks what the hell happened >oh I got jumped by some guys on my way home >he asks what they looked like >don't know but I remember they drove away in a white Camaro >he nods and says okay >about a week later, student comes back and hands me a plastic bag from his backpack >inside is my phone, wallet, and watch >see a news report a few months later about a white Camaro found at the bottom of a nearby lake >owner is still missing

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