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Anon violates the Geneva Convention | /r/Greentext


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Anon uses the internet | /r/Greentext


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Anon realised something | /r/Greentext


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anon uses twitter | /r/Greentext


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Bamboozled | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: kPkSv/99) 07/07/12(Sat)13:00:06M >be 14 year old boy >chat with girl of my age >tells me she's into older guys >pretend I'm 19 >sext with her >arrange meeting >go to her house >it's chris hanson >crew goes to jail for sexting with me
Anonymous (ID: kPkSv/99) 07/07/12(Sat)13:00:06M >be 14 year old boy >chat with girl of my age >tells me she's into older guys >pretend I'm 19 >sext with her >arrange meeting >go to her house >it's chris hanson >crew goes to jail for sexting with me

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Anon buys a new car | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)10:45:50 No.68080914 >be me >buy new car >old car had thermostat to make air more red or more blue >turn red for warmth, turn blue for сool A/C 477 KB JPG >easy to use, any retard can figure it out >new car has knob with no red/blue indicators >turning knob changes the number of degrees Fahrenheit >have no idea what to set the temperature to when I'm cold or hot What do you fancy car Anons set your temp at? | set mine to 69 on the off chance a female is in my car and it works as some sort of subliminal message.
: Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)10:45:50 No.68080914 >be me >buy new car >old car had thermostat to make air more red or more blue >turn red for warmth, turn blue for сool A/C 477 KB JPG >easy to use, any retard can figure it out >new car has knob with no red/blue indicators >turning knob changes the number of degrees Fahrenheit >have no idea what to set the temperature to when I'm cold or hot What do you fancy car Anons set your temp at? | set mine to 69 on the off chance a female is in my car and it works as some sort of subliminal message.

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Anon cry’s | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)01:09:08 No.875719787 I watch p--- for the storyline and the interesting plot twist. like the touching tale of the poor, hungry woman and the pizza boy. it's a tale of helping those in need, romance and pizza. 6 KB JPG the woman, who is very poor and very hungry orders a pizza. >extra large with sausage and creamy sauce (an odd request, but lets move on) >enters pizza boy with the pizza. >he rings the doorbell. she anwers the door. she can't afford new clothes so she only has yoga pants and a bra. poor girl. >"here you are ma'am. an extra large pizza with creamy sauce" she reaches for her wallet only to discover the money she thought she had wasnt there. >she pleads with the pizza boy >"im sorry, i cant afford the pizza but im very poor and very hungry. is there anything you can do to help me out?" the pizza boy realized the seriousness of her situation and decides to help. just as he was going to tell her that her pizza was on him, his d--- accidently exits his pants. >they lock eyes and the romance begins. its hard to watch this movie with my parent because they dont understand why im crying, but im a softy, ill admit. love a good love story with a happy ending. Special Delivery: the fuckenings is a must watch. >10/10 recommend. 3 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)01:09:08 No.875719787 I watch p--- for the storyline and the interesting plot twist. like the touching tale of the poor, hungry woman and the pizza boy. it's a tale of helping those in need, romance and pizza. 6 KB JPG the woman, who is very poor and very hungry orders a pizza. >extra large with sausage and creamy sauce (an odd request, but lets move on) >enters pizza boy with the pizza. >he rings the doorbell. she anwers the door. she can't afford new clothes so she only has yoga pants and a bra. poor girl. >"here you are ma'am. an extra large pizza with creamy sauce" she reaches for her wallet only to discover the money she thought she had wasnt there. >she pleads with the pizza boy >"im sorry, i cant afford the pizza but im very poor and very hungry. is there anything you can do to help me out?" the pizza boy realized the seriousness of her situation and decides to help. just as he was going to tell her that her pizza was on him, his d--- accidently exits his pants. >they lock eyes and the romance begins. its hard to watch this movie with my parent because they dont understand why im crying, but im a softy, ill admit. love a good love story with a happy ending. Special Delivery: the fuckenings is a must watch. >10/10 recommend. 3 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon expected a community of intellectuals | /r/Greentext

File: e77.jpg (15 KB, 399x400) Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)15:33:22 No.68079598 >>68079628 >be me. bored as f--- >idea.png went to r/atheism. expected to find a community of intellectuals. >mfw "Islam this islam that" "Christian this christen that". retards moaning about their parents forcing them to Sunday school or somethin explain to me anons why are these people like this. I want to get away from religion just to find them f------ discuss it further Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)15:36:02 No.68079628 >>68079598 (OP) >r/atheist >expected to find a community of intellectuals comedy gold.
File: e77.jpg (15 KB, 399x400) Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)15:33:22 No.68079598 >>68079628 >be me. bored as f--- >idea.png went to r/atheism. expected to find a community of intellectuals. >mfw "Islam this islam that" "Christian this christen that". retards moaning about their parents forcing them to Sunday school or somethin explain to me anons why are these people like this. I want to get away from religion just to find them f------ discuss it further Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)15:36:02 No.68079628 >>68079598 (OP) >r/atheist >expected to find a community of intellectuals comedy gold.

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Anon drinks a cocktail | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)22:36:22 No.703956574 >"Shaken, not stirred" I got curious and wanted to know if there was an actual difference between shaking a martini and stirring it. 71 кв JPG I thought it wouldn't matter, since you're just mixing the ingredients, but apparently a study was conducted to determine if the preparation of a martini had any influence on its antioxidant сарacity: the study found that shaken gin martinis were able to break down hydrogen peroxide and leave only 0.072% of the peroxide behind, while the stirred gin martini left behind 0.157% of the peroxide. Based on this information I have concluded that for James Bond to be able to detect a difference this small, he must be massively autistic.
: Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)22:36:22 No.703956574 >"Shaken, not stirred" I got curious and wanted to know if there was an actual difference between shaking a martini and stirring it. 71 кв JPG I thought it wouldn't matter, since you're just mixing the ingredients, but apparently a study was conducted to determine if the preparation of a martini had any influence on its antioxidant сарacity: the study found that shaken gin martinis were able to break down hydrogen peroxide and leave only 0.072% of the peroxide behind, while the stirred gin martini left behind 0.157% of the peroxide. Based on this information I have concluded that for James Bond to be able to detect a difference this small, he must be massively autistic.

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I don’t know a creative title | /r/Greentext

>> O Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)12:55:44 No.875727537 File: 72C05B6D-C5DA-472C-B620-F(...).jpg (33 KB, 474x474) >>875727843 >After a few days of living with us she was comfortable walking around the house in nothing but her panties and a mini shirt >she would joke about how she should take care of us all for letting her stay and was flirting like a m----------- >that weekend she was working and we all went out, the club she was working as a hostess at was too fancy for us but we went clubbing and then returned home for kick ons >she messaged us a video from her bar before clocking of telling us she would bring home bottles >she brought home many bottles of jagermeister because her bar had had a promotional event >she started making us cocktails and dancing around drunk flirtatious >my room mate asked her if she wasn't hoot in her bar out fit and she straight up stripped down to her panties as though he had ordered her. O Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)13:07:34 No.875727843 File: A5DC7532-304C-4004-A59A-9...).jpg (430 KB, 989x2166) >>875727537 >she got us to do shots from her belly button and was giggling as some of us got touchy with her >she sat back into my lap giving me a cheeky lap dance infront of everyone and she let me undo her bar and got her t--- out >she made us more cocktails serving them topless and one of my house mates asked if he could Do a shot of her belly button again >she layed down but before pouring the shot she pulled down her panties >within moments on house mate had his c--- in her mouth and another was between her legs f------ her raw >we took turns f------ her until the morning and I bent her over and ass f----- her while my house mate face f----- her >she passed out full of c-- on the couch >in the morning she made us all a vegan breakfast This was the first week and she ended up staying nearly a month
>> O Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)12:55:44 No.875727537 File: 72C05B6D-C5DA-472C-B620-F(...).jpg (33 KB, 474x474) >>875727843 >After a few days of living with us she was comfortable walking around the house in nothing but her panties and a mini shirt >she would joke about how she should take care of us all for letting her stay and was flirting like a m----------- >that weekend she was working and we all went out, the club she was working as a hostess at was too fancy for us but we went clubbing and then returned home for kick ons >she messaged us a video from her bar before clocking of telling us she would bring home bottles >she brought home many bottles of jagermeister because her bar had had a promotional event >she started making us cocktails and dancing around drunk flirtatious >my room mate asked her if she wasn't hoot in her bar out fit and she straight up stripped down to her panties as though he had ordered her. O Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)13:07:34 No.875727843 File: A5DC7532-304C-4004-A59A-9...).jpg (430 KB, 989x2166) >>875727537 >she got us to do shots from her belly button and was giggling as some of us got touchy with her >she sat back into my lap giving me a cheeky lap dance infront of everyone and she let me undo her bar and got her t--- out >she made us more cocktails serving them topless and one of my house mates asked if he could Do a shot of her belly button again >she layed down but before pouring the shot she pulled down her panties >within moments on house mate had his c--- in her mouth and another was between her legs f------ her raw >we took turns f------ her until the morning and I bent her over and ass f----- her while my house mate face f----- her >she passed out full of c-- on the couch >in the morning she made us all a vegan breakfast This was the first week and she ended up staying nearly a month

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Anon connects with fellow 4channer | /r/Greentext

File: 7ADB6203-34E4-4815-871F-4(...).jpg (60 KB, 523x568) O Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)11:47:01 No.875725611 [Reply] D>>875726941 >>875726994 >>875727512 >be me today >in car at lunch hanging with friends >one friend brings up how he spends alot of his time CAN SPOR here >i say "yeah, i'm always on /b/" >friend shouts "YOU'RE A /B/TARD?" >we dap each other up at the newfound realization that we are both profoundly retarded this just brought us alot closer together bros.
File: 7ADB6203-34E4-4815-871F-4(...).jpg (60 KB, 523x568) O Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)11:47:01 No.875725611 [Reply] D>>875726941 >>875726994 >>875727512 >be me today >in car at lunch hanging with friends >one friend brings up how he spends alot of his time CAN SPOR here >i say "yeah, i'm always on /b/" >friend shouts "YOU'RE A /B/TARD?" >we dap each other up at the newfound realization that we are both profoundly retarded this just brought us alot closer together bros.

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Anon visits philadelphia | /r/Greentext


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Anon critiques women’s taste in men | /r/Greentext

File: samus-confused.png (219 KB, 358x372) O Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)12:29:52 No.875726856 [Reply] >>875727838 >be older (like 30s and s---) >turned into more of a ? crybaby with age >just can't even with life ? anymore >don't even have the energy to get mad like I used to >just cry instead when something goes arong >for some reason this endearing to women ?
File: samus-confused.png (219 KB, 358x372) O Anonymous 04/05/22(Tue)12:29:52 No.875726856 [Reply] >>875727838 >be older (like 30s and s---) >turned into more of a ? crybaby with age >just can't even with life ? anymore >don't even have the energy to get mad like I used to >just cry instead when something goes arong >for some reason this endearing to women ?

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Anon can’t think straight | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous06/07/17(Wed)22:27:04 No.37570730 >really hot girl in class >decide to work up the courage to speak to her >"H-hey.. c-can I borrow your pen for a second?" >she hands me her pen >realize I dont even have 24 KB JPG paper to write on >shes staring at me >My mind is racing what to do >Draw a penis on my hand >give her back her pen and walk away
: Anonymous06/07/17(Wed)22:27:04 No.37570730 >really hot girl in class >decide to work up the courage to speak to her >"H-hey.. c-can I borrow your pen for a second?" >she hands me her pen >realize I dont even have 24 KB JPG paper to write on >shes staring at me >My mind is racing what to do >Draw a penis on my hand >give her back her pen and walk away

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Anon wtf.. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)18:57:42 No.857446821 >be me, 28 year old Texas f-- >live in Corpus Christi >love it here but city has a bad homeless problem >get sick of it and take matters into my own hands 272 KB JPG >last week find a hobo walking through grocery store parking lot in morning >strike up conversation and befriend him >offer to pay him $200 if he helps me move furniture out of my house in Austin >he agrees >l don't have house in Austin >we go to Austin, ~4 hour drive >he gets out to use bathroom in gas station in random ghetto >I leave him and drive back to corpus Is relocating the homeless to s--- cities the answer we've been looking for? I think next weekend I'm gonna pick up 3 hobos and leave them in Dallas
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)18:57:42 No.857446821 >be me, 28 year old Texas f-- >live in Corpus Christi >love it here but city has a bad homeless problem >get sick of it and take matters into my own hands 272 KB JPG >last week find a hobo walking through grocery store parking lot in morning >strike up conversation and befriend him >offer to pay him $200 if he helps me move furniture out of my house in Austin >he agrees >l don't have house in Austin >we go to Austin, ~4 hour drive >he gets out to use bathroom in gas station in random ghetto >I leave him and drive back to corpus Is relocating the homeless to s--- cities the answer we've been looking for? I think next weekend I'm gonna pick up 3 hobos and leave them in Dallas

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Absolute movie | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/11/21(Thu)16:30:14 No.159019347 the last airbender.png 356 KB PNG >Show up in film industry when nobody was asking for you >Become highest grossing film of all time >Promise a million sequels and deliver zero >Leave >Show up a decade later just to cuck Marvel out of getting highest grossing movie >Leave again >Nobody remembers a single line of dialogue
: Anonymous 11/11/21(Thu)16:30:14 No.159019347 the last airbender.png 356 KB PNG >Show up in film industry when nobody was asking for you >Become highest grossing film of all time >Promise a million sequels and deliver zero >Leave >Show up a decade later just to cuck Marvel out of getting highest grossing movie >Leave again >Nobody remembers a single line of dialogue

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Anons dad should have stopped drinking | /r/Greentext


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Anon needs help | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: pvkNTfOo ) 04/04/ >neighbor found out im a nazi now what?
Anonymous (ID: pvkNTfOo ) 04/04/ >neighbor found out im a nazi now what?

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Doctors hate anon for this one simple trick | /r/Greentext

File: d8og2uv-96b2cc0d-9281-4f3(.).jpg (39 KB, 640x818) O fatties btfo Anonymous > Eat only when hungry > Thin Literally this easy.
File: d8og2uv-96b2cc0d-9281-4f3(.).jpg (39 KB, 640x818) O fatties btfo Anonymous > Eat only when hungry > Thin Literally this easy.

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Anon shares a link | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/04/22(Mon)20:07:25 No.875707823 Hey guys, there's this really cool website I found. It's called 4chan. You're gonna love it. https://www.4chan.org/ 802 KB GIF 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 04/04/22(Mon)20:10:02 No.875707947 >>875707823 (OP) # I don't like it.
: Anonymous 04/04/22(Mon)20:07:25 No.875707823 Hey guys, there's this really cool website I found. It's called 4chan. You're gonna love it. https://www.4chan.org/ 802 KB GIF 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 04/04/22(Mon)20:10:02 No.875707947 >>875707823 (OP) # I don't like it.

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