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Anon discovers the meaning of lifting | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/02/21(Sat)20:27:48 No.63759172 >be me >get yelled at repeatedly by my 2nd grade teacher >grow up to be a massive dude >get stronger at the gym >see the teacher out in public again 247 KB PNG >she's all nice to me >l yell and berate the s--- out of her and she runs away scared shitless This is why I lift
: Anonymous 10/02/21(Sat)20:27:48 No.63759172 >be me >get yelled at repeatedly by my 2nd grade teacher >grow up to be a massive dude >get stronger at the gym >see the teacher out in public again 247 KB PNG >she's all nice to me >l yell and berate the s--- out of her and she runs away scared shitless This is why I lift

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Anon discusses cannonballs | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/18/21(Wed)14:29:03 No.50279407 R(13).jpg 72 KB JPG >Dude a big ball landing near you somehow causes an explosion and kills you You expect me to believe this s---?
: Anonymous 08/18/21(Wed)14:29:03 No.50279407 R(13).jpg 72 KB JPG >Dude a big ball landing near you somehow causes an explosion and kills you You expect me to believe this s---?

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Anon made a mistake | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)16:53:41 No.68297393 People That Walk Fast Are Reported To Be Less Happy >unironically shared IQ test on social media when i was a teenager that s--- alone is reason enough to kms The faster you walk the more unhappy you are. SONIC 62 KB JPG : Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)16:58:56 No.68297452 >>68297393 (OP) # I shared my crushes bikini pics on Facebook to my phone so I could download them and zoom in. This was 16 KB JPG sophomore year of HS. Sat next to her in class and didnt know that would send a notification
: Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)16:53:41 No.68297393 People That Walk Fast Are Reported To Be Less Happy >unironically shared IQ test on social media when i was a teenager that s--- alone is reason enough to kms The faster you walk the more unhappy you are. SONIC 62 KB JPG : Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)16:58:56 No.68297452 >>68297393 (OP) # I shared my crushes bikini pics on Facebook to my phone so I could download them and zoom in. This was 16 KB JPG sophomore year of HS. Sat next to her in class and didnt know that would send a notification

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Anon does not care anymore | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)21:15:58 No.876618275 >be me >20 >beta in the family >one family member slept all through afternoon till it's 7pm >don't really care about them but I knew I should wake him up >gets mad that I didn't wake him 5 KB PNG up earlier >blames me and yelled at me >had a feeling of him being violent if I talk back >"you're useless anon" "some bad words" >proceeds to keep a mouth shut >afraid but willing to kill him when he hurts me Me when Idc anymore
: Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)21:15:58 No.876618275 >be me >20 >beta in the family >one family member slept all through afternoon till it's 7pm >don't really care about them but I knew I should wake him up >gets mad that I didn't wake him 5 KB PNG up earlier >blames me and yelled at me >had a feeling of him being violent if I talk back >"you're useless anon" "some bad words" >proceeds to keep a mouth shut >afraid but willing to kill him when he hurts me Me when Idc anymore

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Anon cures his anxiety | /r/Greentext

29m (4/20 19:10) · 876630348 5 Re · 2 Img · PNG · 193KB · (601 × 473) 5 Replies >be me >feel anxiety >unload massive s--- >anxiety gone 28m (4/20 19:11) · 876630394 >>876630348 (OP) >be retarded •..
29m (4/20 19:10) · 876630348 5 Re · 2 Img · PNG · 193KB · (601 × 473) 5 Replies >be me >feel anxiety >unload massive s--- >anxiety gone 28m (4/20 19:11) · 876630394 >>876630348 (OP) >be retarded •..

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Who said 4chan was racist ? | /r/Greentext

File: 1647190046089.jpg (59 KB, 900x770) Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:09:26 No.876533416 >>876533475 >>876533528 >>876533572 >>876533637 >>876533676 >>876533709 >>876533751 >>876533753 >>876533951 >>876534990 >>876535652 >>876535766 >>876535803 >>876535874 Looking for a word that begins with N and ends with R. Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:10:09 No.876533450 >>876533508 Neighbor Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:10:41 No.876533475 >>876533416 (OP) # never Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:11:15 No.876533508 >>876533564 >>876533450 # h--------. he got you there op Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:11:29 No.876533522 >>876535971 Nectar Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:11:38 No.876533528 >>876533416 (OP) # Near >> >>
File: 1647190046089.jpg (59 KB, 900x770) Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:09:26 No.876533416 >>876533475 >>876533528 >>876533572 >>876533637 >>876533676 >>876533709 >>876533751 >>876533753 >>876533951 >>876534990 >>876535652 >>876535766 >>876535803 >>876535874 Looking for a word that begins with N and ends with R. Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:10:09 No.876533450 >>876533508 Neighbor Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:10:41 No.876533475 >>876533416 (OP) # never Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:11:15 No.876533508 >>876533564 >>876533450 # h--------. he got you there op Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:11:29 No.876533522 >>876535971 Nectar Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)02:11:38 No.876533528 >>876533416 (OP) # Near >> >>

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Anon visits KFC | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >go to kfc for the first time in my life >only 4 white people in the restaurant including the cashier >the rest are mexicans and blacks >constant screams and noises, children crying 25 KB JPG >"AYO DIS CHIGGIN WANG IS DRY WHO COOKED DIS CHIGEN" >cashier and the big nigress get into a fight this country is a s------- 1 Reply / 1 Image View Thread Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)17:30:28 No.68298470 >dry chicken Hate nigs but if the chicken is dry he's like 90% justified 301 KB GIF 04/20/22 (Wed)17:28:15 No.68298445
: Anonymous >go to kfc for the first time in my life >only 4 white people in the restaurant including the cashier >the rest are mexicans and blacks >constant screams and noises, children crying 25 KB JPG >"AYO DIS CHIGGIN WANG IS DRY WHO COOKED DIS CHIGEN" >cashier and the big nigress get into a fight this country is a s------- 1 Reply / 1 Image View Thread Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)17:30:28 No.68298470 >dry chicken Hate nigs but if the chicken is dry he's like 90% justified 301 KB GIF 04/20/22 (Wed)17:28:15 No.68298445

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Good ol’ President Taft | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/07/20(Sat)23:15:41 No.8211766 >>8211690 (OP) # 629 KB PNG >[Taft] apparently was very good- natured about his girth. Before becoming president, he once APPLE PIE. visited a small town on legal business. After his meeting, he learned that the next scheduled train would not arrive for several hours, although an express train would run through in less than an hour - but without stopping. >He therefore wired the railroad superintendent to ask if the express train would stop for a "large party." The superintendent agreed, and signaled ahead to the train's conductor to make an unscheduled stop. When Taft boarded the train, he remarked to the bewildered conductor, "You can go ahead; I AM the large party."
: Anonymous 03/07/20(Sat)23:15:41 No.8211766 >>8211690 (OP) # 629 KB PNG >[Taft] apparently was very good- natured about his girth. Before becoming president, he once APPLE PIE. visited a small town on legal business. After his meeting, he learned that the next scheduled train would not arrive for several hours, although an express train would run through in less than an hour - but without stopping. >He therefore wired the railroad superintendent to ask if the express train would stop for a "large party." The superintendent agreed, and signaled ahead to the train's conductor to make an unscheduled stop. When Taft boarded the train, he remarked to the bewildered conductor, "You can go ahead; I AM the large party."

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Modern day degeneracy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: ZFGUxpxc ) E 04/20/22(Wed)13:05:08 No.373819234 r/offmychest 258d Join So my son 15M found that me 43F and my husband 45M are into cuckolding (I sleep with other men as my husband watch) six months after finding out he still refuses to speak to us and his utter disgust when he looks at me (lassume he googled what cuckolding is) is killing me. He found because I got careless I am not very tech savy and stupidly asked him to fix something on my computer and he found some pictures and at first he did not say anything he just got very quiet still does his homework never tate for school or acted out in any way. But then after being given the silent treatment for almost a month I sat him down and asked him what wongwrong and the exploded at me calling me every name in the book. If dad is not good enough then divorce him he yelled at me, his father tried to talk to him but he just keeps telling him to divorce me. He has never acted out like that before and is a good kid and we obviously have stopped since he found out. One of the men involved he knows and he has been like an uncle to him I had to inform him that he found out what has been happening, my son now hates him as well and it's caused so much harm. He is always quiet now refuses to have dinner with us my husband said either eat with us or go hungry but then he just went to his room without dinner and refused to eat all together and my husband and I backtracked after he only ate at school for a week and let him eat alone eventually. Maybe he needs to talk to somebody but he hardly has said more than maybe four sentences to us these last months. He is way more angry at me than his tather atleast he responds to his father me he is ignoring completely We tried putting the hammer down and even stupidly followed the advice of another couple we know who said just tell him it's none of his business and we did and that only pushed him farthern away from us and only made things even worse and he completely shut down. He has zero respect for me and keeps telling his father that I am a bad person who enjoy humiliating him and that he should divorce me. I feel so horrible and my son hates me . 10 O28 O Share 1650437702451.jpg 220 KB JPG What the F--- do we do about modern day degeneracy?
: Anonymous (ID: ZFGUxpxc ) E 04/20/22(Wed)13:05:08 No.373819234 r/offmychest 258d Join So my son 15M found that me 43F and my husband 45M are into cuckolding (I sleep with other men as my husband watch) six months after finding out he still refuses to speak to us and his utter disgust when he looks at me (lassume he googled what cuckolding is) is killing me. He found because I got careless I am not very tech savy and stupidly asked him to fix something on my computer and he found some pictures and at first he did not say anything he just got very quiet still does his homework never tate for school or acted out in any way. But then after being given the silent treatment for almost a month I sat him down and asked him what wongwrong and the exploded at me calling me every name in the book. If dad is not good enough then divorce him he yelled at me, his father tried to talk to him but he just keeps telling him to divorce me. He has never acted out like that before and is a good kid and we obviously have stopped since he found out. One of the men involved he knows and he has been like an uncle to him I had to inform him that he found out what has been happening, my son now hates him as well and it's caused so much harm. He is always quiet now refuses to have dinner with us my husband said either eat with us or go hungry but then he just went to his room without dinner and refused to eat all together and my husband and I backtracked after he only ate at school for a week and let him eat alone eventually. Maybe he needs to talk to somebody but he hardly has said more than maybe four sentences to us these last months. He is way more angry at me than his tather atleast he responds to his father me he is ignoring completely We tried putting the hammer down and even stupidly followed the advice of another couple we know who said just tell him it's none of his business and we did and that only pushed him farthern away from us and only made things even worse and he completely shut down. He has zero respect for me and keeps telling his father that I am a bad person who enjoy humiliating him and that he should divorce me. I feel so horrible and my son hates me . 10 O28 O Share 1650437702451.jpg 220 KB JPG What the F--- do we do about modern day degeneracy?

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Anon is racist | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)17:01:41 No.68298156 >talk to a girl for 3 months >she sends her photo >she's black >delete account and cut off all contact Holy f--- why is god punishing me like this. Its cruel 10 KB JPG 12 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 04/20/22(Wed)17:01:41 No.68298156 >talk to a girl for 3 months >she sends her photo >she's black >delete account and cut off all contact Holy f--- why is god punishing me like this. Its cruel 10 KB JPG 12 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon tries to discuss. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Da Trans 04/20/22(Wed)14:34:02 No.68300045 >be me redditfag > go on any discussion sub > ask a simple question not trying to agitate just want discussion > Should HRT and Gender Reassignment Be restricted to age 18 and above? > Banned for trans-phobia, hatred, 350 B PNG etc > Account suspended >*sigh*
Anonymous Da Trans 04/20/22(Wed)14:34:02 No.68300045 >be me redditfag > go on any discussion sub > ask a simple question not trying to agitate just want discussion > Should HRT and Gender Reassignment Be restricted to age 18 and above? > Banned for trans-phobia, hatred, 350 B PNG etc > Account suspended >*sigh*

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Anon the joker | /r/Greentext


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Anon is miserable | /r/Greentext

>one chance at life >born in a rural area >ridiculous weather every day >hurricane winds >storms >snow 109 KB JPG >ice >freezing cold >extreme heat >house is old and s----- >nothing around for miles >no friends and nobody >literally 365 days out of the year the weather is complete dog s--- and miserable
>one chance at life >born in a rural area >ridiculous weather every day >hurricane winds >storms >snow 109 KB JPG >ice >freezing cold >extreme heat >house is old and s----- >nothing around for miles >no friends and nobody >literally 365 days out of the year the weather is complete dog s--- and miserable

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anon knows his rap music | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/17/22(Sun)19:32:55 No.876454190 The most influential person in the entire world history. 1.09 MB PNG : Anonymous 04/17/22(Sun)19:35:56 No.876454335 he's one of those white rappers, aint he? >>876454547 #
: Anonymous 04/17/22(Sun)19:32:55 No.876454190 The most influential person in the entire world history. 1.09 MB PNG : Anonymous 04/17/22(Sun)19:35:56 No.876454335 he's one of those white rappers, aint he? >>876454547 #

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Anon helps a disabled girl | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: 9SIHOYM4) E3 04/10/17(Mon)10:51:30 No.120464418 >>120452929 # >see girl >qt >in wheelchair >lift is out of service >she looks a little perturbed >approach her >offer to carry her up the stairs >"oh that's very sweet of you but-" >reassure her of my strength >flex a little, just to get the message across >"but really-" >decide to be alpha >just f----- pick her up >doesn't say much >effortlessly carry her up the five flights of stairs >put her down >walk off with a slightly smug expression >she just sits there, unable to do anything without her wheelchair
Anonymous (ID: 9SIHOYM4) E3 04/10/17(Mon)10:51:30 No.120464418 >>120452929 # >see girl >qt >in wheelchair >lift is out of service >she looks a little perturbed >approach her >offer to carry her up the stairs >"oh that's very sweet of you but-" >reassure her of my strength >flex a little, just to get the message across >"but really-" >decide to be alpha >just f----- pick her up >doesn't say much >effortlessly carry her up the five flights of stairs >put her down >walk off with a slightly smug expression >she just sits there, unable to do anything without her wheelchair

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anon is a buddhist | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/26/22(Sat)11:28:12 No.875140667 SHEEEEEEEEEEeeee ss.jpg 60 KB JPG >be me >family practices Buddhism >uncle was dying >told our family he had a vision of himself soaring in the sky and landing into a nest >whole family thinks it's a gift and he was shown his next life as a bird >he tells his wife he will come see her in his next life >at his wake a bird flew into one of the glass sliding doors >it f------ died >my whole family lost their s---
: Anonymous 03/26/22(Sat)11:28:12 No.875140667 SHEEEEEEEEEEeeee ss.jpg 60 KB JPG >be me >family practices Buddhism >uncle was dying >told our family he had a vision of himself soaring in the sky and landing into a nest >whole family thinks it's a gift and he was shown his next life as a bird >he tells his wife he will come see her in his next life >at his wake a bird flew into one of the glass sliding doors >it f------ died >my whole family lost their s---

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Anon is a dude | /r/Greentext

>be brain >chilling in some dude's head >he fell asleep wait check this out >AYO WE'RE FALLING BRO >jumpscare.exe >Imao go back to sleep dumbass 52 KB JPG
>be brain >chilling in some dude's head >he fell asleep wait check this out >AYO WE'RE FALLING BRO >jumpscare.exe >Imao go back to sleep dumbass 52 KB JPG

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Anon chats with his coworkers | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/10/21(Wed)06:13:44 No.66100333 >be office lunch >coworkers are (for some reason) talking about how many sexual partners they've had >despite being the quiet incel type, I've actually had 8 girls in my entire life 21 KB JPG >so mention that I've slept with 8 people while getting something from the fridge >one coworker: "escorts don't count, silly." everyone snickers >me (taking slight offense): "your cousins don't count either, cheryl" >for some reason, I'm the one who gets in trouble
: Anonymous 11/10/21(Wed)06:13:44 No.66100333 >be office lunch >coworkers are (for some reason) talking about how many sexual partners they've had >despite being the quiet incel type, I've actually had 8 girls in my entire life 21 KB JPG >so mention that I've slept with 8 people while getting something from the fridge >one coworker: "escorts don't count, silly." everyone snickers >me (taking slight offense): "your cousins don't count either, cheryl" >for some reason, I'm the one who gets in trouble

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Anon tells a high school anecdote | /r/Greentext

>>876615505 >Be me inna high school >17 years old, circa 2006 >Friends with a bunch of different groups >Protected some little anime club f--- from their bullies >They take their newfound freedom to far >Turns out they're Naruto running down the halls of the english building >Doing spin kicks off of walls and s--- >Running into people and knocking them over >Just generally being dickbags >Get asked to help by a couple cheerleader friends >Promise to help, I gave them their freedom to begin with >Observe them for a couple days >They always take the same route and jump off the wall at the same spot >Kinda cool looking, not gonna lie, well rehearsed >Still causing problems though >Go out to local grocery store >Obtain several bottles of sexual lubricant >Right before 5th period ends, go out to hall and apply lubricant liberally to wall >Get caught by vice principal while slathering astroglide on a laminated wood wall >WAT.jpg >He knows I am up to something but the absurdity of what he is witnessing causes his brain to short circuit >l promise him it will be magical and to just let it happen >l wipe my lubed up hand on his baby blue shirt as I push him to an out of the way corner to watch >He keeps eyeing me and the wall, unsure of how this all fits together >The bell rings >ltsShowtime.gif >Students pour out into the hallway >Two little 5'2" cretins come sprinting out, arms straight back, weaving in and out of the other teens >The vice principal immediately knows they're the targets, looks straight at me with furious knowledge >He still doesn't understand the lubed wall >The Narutards finally reach the wall for their well rehearsed double spin kick >They leap in unison >Their feet touch the wall in unison >They fail to gain purchase in unison >They faceplant against the wall in unison >The entire hallways erupts in laughter >Vice principal covers his mouth to hide his laughter and takes off >They never did that s--- again
>>876615505 >Be me inna high school >17 years old, circa 2006 >Friends with a bunch of different groups >Protected some little anime club f--- from their bullies >They take their newfound freedom to far >Turns out they're Naruto running down the halls of the english building >Doing spin kicks off of walls and s--- >Running into people and knocking them over >Just generally being dickbags >Get asked to help by a couple cheerleader friends >Promise to help, I gave them their freedom to begin with >Observe them for a couple days >They always take the same route and jump off the wall at the same spot >Kinda cool looking, not gonna lie, well rehearsed >Still causing problems though >Go out to local grocery store >Obtain several bottles of sexual lubricant >Right before 5th period ends, go out to hall and apply lubricant liberally to wall >Get caught by vice principal while slathering astroglide on a laminated wood wall >WAT.jpg >He knows I am up to something but the absurdity of what he is witnessing causes his brain to short circuit >l promise him it will be magical and to just let it happen >l wipe my lubed up hand on his baby blue shirt as I push him to an out of the way corner to watch >He keeps eyeing me and the wall, unsure of how this all fits together >The bell rings >ltsShowtime.gif >Students pour out into the hallway >Two little 5'2" cretins come sprinting out, arms straight back, weaving in and out of the other teens >The vice principal immediately knows they're the targets, looks straight at me with furious knowledge >He still doesn't understand the lubed wall >The Narutards finally reach the wall for their well rehearsed double spin kick >They leap in unison >Their feet touch the wall in unison >They fail to gain purchase in unison >They faceplant against the wall in unison >The entire hallways erupts in laughter >Vice principal covers his mouth to hide his laughter and takes off >They never did that s--- again

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Femanon loses her bf | /r/Greentext

File: 1491622216885.jpg (45 KB, 478x572) O Anonymous 04/03/18(Tue)15:47:36 No.764796496 >be me >24yo femanon >need to take a s--- >go to the bathroom >push out a massive thick STIFF s--- 75% of the way >pull it back in >push it back out 3/4 of the way >pull it back in >repeat several times >like i'm getting f----- by a qt boy >then accidentally push too much >my qt bf falls into the toilet >shed a tear as i flush him 12 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view. >> Anonymous 04/03/18(Tue)15:58:39 No.764797525 >>764796496 (OP) Well, thats enough Internet for today
File: 1491622216885.jpg (45 KB, 478x572) O Anonymous 04/03/18(Tue)15:47:36 No.764796496 >be me >24yo femanon >need to take a s--- >go to the bathroom >push out a massive thick STIFF s--- 75% of the way >pull it back in >push it back out 3/4 of the way >pull it back in >repeat several times >like i'm getting f----- by a qt boy >then accidentally push too much >my qt bf falls into the toilet >shed a tear as i flush him 12 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view. >> Anonymous 04/03/18(Tue)15:58:39 No.764797525 >>764796496 (OP) Well, thats enough Internet for today

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