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Nobody said it was easy... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/19/21(Fri)18:30:30 No.62409173 >be me >think i'm an incel >realize i've never actually tried to seduce a girl >which makes me single by choice, not involuntary celibate >get Tinder, start watching pua s--- 22 KB PNG >take care of myself, start having hobbies >ask some girls out >get rejected >now I'm officially an incel how do you do, fellow social retards
: Anonymous 02/19/21(Fri)18:30:30 No.62409173 >be me >think i'm an incel >realize i've never actually tried to seduce a girl >which makes me single by choice, not involuntary celibate >get Tinder, start watching pua s--- 22 KB PNG >take care of myself, start having hobbies >ask some girls out >get rejected >now I'm officially an incel how do you do, fellow social retards

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Same my guy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/26/22(Tue)15:33:05 No.68380360 >tfw too depressed to even watch p--- 55 KB PNG
: Anonymous 04/26/22(Tue)15:33:05 No.68380360 >tfw too depressed to even watch p--- 55 KB PNG

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Anon visits /b/ | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/16/21(Thu)10:00:46 No.65400999 >be me >newfag from r/greentexts >endlessly scrolling through /b/ >open a random archived thread >see a woman's body cut in half, guts and s--- all spilling out >w--.jpg where are all the funny greentexts, why do 234 KB PNG i only see loli p--- and gore View Thread
: Anonymous 09/16/21(Thu)10:00:46 No.65400999 >be me >newfag from r/greentexts >endlessly scrolling through /b/ >open a random archived thread >see a woman's body cut in half, guts and s--- all spilling out >w--.jpg where are all the funny greentexts, why do 234 KB PNG i only see loli p--- and gore View Thread

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Anon has one chance | /r/Greentext


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Anon goes out clubbing | /r/Greentext


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Anon wants to know | /r/Greentext

Transgender woman Ashley Hallstrom wrote in her Facebook post: >From a very young age I was told that people like me are freaks and abominations, that we are sick in the head and society hates us 61 KB JPG >This made me hate who I was. I tried so hard to be just like everyone else but this isn't something you can change. I can't stand to live another day, so I'm committing suicide. Soon after Ashley walked into traffic and was fatally hit by a dump truck. You caused this, /pol/. How can you possibly find this funny? : Anonymous (ID: UP9C9V3N 01/03/22(Mon)14:01:14 No.354828695 Now post a pic of her from before she got hit by the truck
Transgender woman Ashley Hallstrom wrote in her Facebook post: >From a very young age I was told that people like me are freaks and abominations, that we are sick in the head and society hates us 61 KB JPG >This made me hate who I was. I tried so hard to be just like everyone else but this isn't something you can change. I can't stand to live another day, so I'm committing suicide. Soon after Ashley walked into traffic and was fatally hit by a dump truck. You caused this, /pol/. How can you possibly find this funny? : Anonymous (ID: UP9C9V3N 01/03/22(Mon)14:01:14 No.354828695 Now post a pic of her from before she got hit by the truck

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Best game I've played in a long time | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)01:03:26 No.64256883 >play Hitman for 10 minutes >15 hours pass 702 KB JPG : Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)01:05:29 No.64256900 >>64256883 (OP) # I guess you really needed that anon
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)01:03:26 No.64256883 >play Hitman for 10 minutes >15 hours pass 702 KB JPG : Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)01:05:29 No.64256900 >>64256883 (OP) # I guess you really needed that anon

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Anon has somebody watching their back | /r/Greentext


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Full employment act | /r/Greentext


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Anon hates GTA 5 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/12/22(Sat)08:21:56 No.872537376 >start mission Drand Sthert auto, >drive from point A to point B >kill X amount of NPC's on point B >drive from point B to point C >mission complete >repeat it 70x times >most profitable video game in history 70 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/12/22(Sat)08:21:56 No.872537376 >start mission Drand Sthert auto, >drive from point A to point B >kill X amount of NPC's on point B >drive from point B to point C >mission complete >repeat it 70x times >most profitable video game in history 70 KB JPG

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Anon is a chemist | /r/Greentext


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Anon thinks about his childhood | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)21:15:51 No.876963950 >be me >struggling academically in school >have no real friends >l hardly ever talked, and people would call me creepy when I was just trying to mind my own business >l'd hear teachers talking about me behind my back, with one of them calling me a pain 68 KB JPG in the ass one time >also struggling with mental illness which didn't help >also got molested in the school bathroom once >always feel like everyone hates me or is judging me behind my back >felt afraid of leaving the house because I thought someone from school would see me >feel like s--- all the time, and I found it hard to enjoy the things I once loved doing >one day, I decide to talk to my parents about me feeling depressed >eventually they both start making fun of me for it >l somehow end up feeling even worse Thanks for helping me through the tough times mom & dad
: Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)21:15:51 No.876963950 >be me >struggling academically in school >have no real friends >l hardly ever talked, and people would call me creepy when I was just trying to mind my own business >l'd hear teachers talking about me behind my back, with one of them calling me a pain 68 KB JPG in the ass one time >also struggling with mental illness which didn't help >also got molested in the school bathroom once >always feel like everyone hates me or is judging me behind my back >felt afraid of leaving the house because I thought someone from school would see me >feel like s--- all the time, and I found it hard to enjoy the things I once loved doing >one day, I decide to talk to my parents about me feeling depressed >eventually they both start making fun of me for it >l somehow end up feeling even worse Thanks for helping me through the tough times mom & dad

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Anon is a virgin | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous 2/06/22(Sun)23:57:14 No.16965346 683A8509-560F-4318-84A2-50F761857668.jpg 68 KB JPG >Writing workshop assignment to try out hand at romance >my paired critiquing partner for that day in class is a woman >after she reads over my work, the first thing she says to me is "You're a virgin, aren't you?"
| Anonymous 2/06/22(Sun)23:57:14 No.16965346 683A8509-560F-4318-84A2-50F761857668.jpg 68 KB JPG >Writing workshop assignment to try out hand at romance >my paired critiquing partner for that day in class is a woman >after she reads over my work, the first thing she says to me is "You're a virgin, aren't you?"

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Acquaintances | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/21/22(Thu)13:43:08 No.166863989 >all your acquaintances will pretend to care about you if you try to kill yourself 29 KB JPG : Anonymous 04/21/22(Thu)13:57:18 No.166864340 My who?
: Anonymous 04/21/22(Thu)13:43:08 No.166863989 >all your acquaintances will pretend to care about you if you try to kill yourself 29 KB JPG : Anonymous 04/21/22(Thu)13:57:18 No.166864340 My who?

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Anon is a bachelor. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/08/20(Sat)07:08:39 No.833852378 >be me >Friend tells me about eHarmony >Talks about his success on it >Bored of tinder and want something more long term so try it out 22 KB PNG >Sign up at 2am drunk and horny >Accidentally set my height as 150cm >Try to change height, only part of the profile that can't be edited??? >??? >Check my bank > £130 to eHarmony >It signs you up for the year up front and l'm too f------ autistic to realise >Mfw l'm paying £130 for all the thots in a 50 mile radius to think I'm a 4'9 manlet 9 Replies / 2 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 08/08/20(Sat)07:08:39 No.833852378 >be me >Friend tells me about eHarmony >Talks about his success on it >Bored of tinder and want something more long term so try it out 22 KB PNG >Sign up at 2am drunk and horny >Accidentally set my height as 150cm >Try to change height, only part of the profile that can't be edited??? >??? >Check my bank > £130 to eHarmony >It signs you up for the year up front and l'm too f------ autistic to realise >Mfw l'm paying £130 for all the thots in a 50 mile radius to think I'm a 4'9 manlet 9 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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anon's music gets interrupted | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/26/22(Tue)08:20:09 No.876969875 >Be me >First year of high school >Lunch break >Sitting at my desk, listening to music >School bully comes out of 176 KB JPG nowhere >"Give me your lunch money, bitch." >l pretend I don't hear him >He forcibly takes off my headphones >"YOUR MONEY, BITCH.' >With a dead stare I say "Oh I am terribly sorry, your mom's moans last night must have damaged my eardrums." >Entire class goes crazy >He lets out an angry roar and channels all of his strength into one punch >l block it with the palm of my hand, the resulting sound from the shockwave echoes through the entire school >"Now what?" >The girls start squirting uncontrollably >He's s------- his f------ pants out of fear >With a single strike to his abdomen, he gets flung into the smart board and shatters it >l say nothing and go back to my music Don't make me angry if you know what is good for you.
: Anonymous 04/26/22(Tue)08:20:09 No.876969875 >Be me >First year of high school >Lunch break >Sitting at my desk, listening to music >School bully comes out of 176 KB JPG nowhere >"Give me your lunch money, bitch." >l pretend I don't hear him >He forcibly takes off my headphones >"YOUR MONEY, BITCH.' >With a dead stare I say "Oh I am terribly sorry, your mom's moans last night must have damaged my eardrums." >Entire class goes crazy >He lets out an angry roar and channels all of his strength into one punch >l block it with the palm of my hand, the resulting sound from the shockwave echoes through the entire school >"Now what?" >The girls start squirting uncontrollably >He's s------- his f------ pants out of fear >With a single strike to his abdomen, he gets flung into the smart board and shatters it >l say nothing and go back to my music Don't make me angry if you know what is good for you.

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Anon is a little troll | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/28/21(Wed)13:52:30 No.64744920 >>64744771 (OP) # >womens spend money and time moisturizing themselves >dry up instantly when they see 14 KB JPG me Heh, nothing personell womens
: Anonymous 07/28/21(Wed)13:52:30 No.64744920 >>64744771 (OP) # >womens spend money and time moisturizing themselves >dry up instantly when they see 14 KB JPG me Heh, nothing personell womens

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Anon is a peasant | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Skyrim 04/26/22(Tue)00:32:20 No.596970089 >Be me >Be a random nord peasant >Chilling and drinking some mead in my small house >6 foot tall reptile breaks in and f------ ransacks what little s----- possesions I own 6 KB JPG >Kills my wife just to take a few coins >Try to fight him back >F----- yells at me in some f----- language with enough force to send me flying into the wall >Guards come in and he pays them off >Summons magic ghost horse >Refuses to elaborate >Leaves >Pic related
: Anonymous Skyrim 04/26/22(Tue)00:32:20 No.596970089 >Be me >Be a random nord peasant >Chilling and drinking some mead in my small house >6 foot tall reptile breaks in and f------ ransacks what little s----- possesions I own 6 KB JPG >Kills my wife just to take a few coins >Try to fight him back >F----- yells at me in some f----- language with enough force to send me flying into the wall >Guards come in and he pays them off >Summons magic ghost horse >Refuses to elaborate >Leaves >Pic related

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The good ol' days | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous The doctor discovers abscesses 07/23/18(Mon)23:32:51 No.6947029 > be me > mentor recently died, I therefore inherited his status as doctor > 7th century idk > walk past the farms on my way to the castle 149 KB PNG > see a family of peasants waiting for me > male is sick, has a big fleshy orb on his back > *notices buldge* ō>õ what's this? > "please cure my husband, he's become ill" > no clue w-- he has > sure.carvedstone > poke with doctors stick > buldge bursts > whitish cream bursts everywhere > looks like spider blood > smells like spider blood > tastes like spider blood > declare farmer possessed by spider > burned alive at the stake > king pays me godly for preventing spider disease from spreading > feelsgoodman
| Anonymous The doctor discovers abscesses 07/23/18(Mon)23:32:51 No.6947029 > be me > mentor recently died, I therefore inherited his status as doctor > 7th century idk > walk past the farms on my way to the castle 149 KB PNG > see a family of peasants waiting for me > male is sick, has a big fleshy orb on his back > *notices buldge* ō>õ what's this? > "please cure my husband, he's become ill" > no clue w-- he has > sure.carvedstone > poke with doctors stick > buldge bursts > whitish cream bursts everywhere > looks like spider blood > smells like spider blood > tastes like spider blood > declare farmer possessed by spider > burned alive at the stake > king pays me godly for preventing spider disease from spreading > feelsgoodman

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Anon is in a romcom. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)23:07:32 No.68376566 >be me >late night at the college campus >class is over so walking back home >see cutie carrying lots of books and looking at her phone >books slip and fall down >be a little socially awkward but realize this is like a f------ romcom and maybe i could finally have 7 KB JPG someone to love >pick them up and tell her I could walk her to wherever shes going >she thanks me and then mentions im really strong carrying all these books >think she's retarded because she wasnt even struggling when carrying them so she shouldnt be impressed but after a couple of minutes realize she's probably flirting >almost coom >decide to joke around and tell her Im strong enough I could totally r--- her and there's nothing she could do about it >she doesn't laugh but she asks for her books back and tells me she can go alone from here since it's kind of a long way and doesn't want to bother me >be confusedand tell her i literally have nothing else to do so I could walk her all the way >she says she's better alone so follow her for a bit to make sure she's safe >she's walking normally but see her quickly reach one of those emergency boxes around campus and press the button multiple times >realize she's probably taking the joke out of context and is going to accuse me of trying to r--- her >cant deal with this s--- right now so run away I f------ hate women anons
Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)23:07:32 No.68376566 >be me >late night at the college campus >class is over so walking back home >see cutie carrying lots of books and looking at her phone >books slip and fall down >be a little socially awkward but realize this is like a f------ romcom and maybe i could finally have 7 KB JPG someone to love >pick them up and tell her I could walk her to wherever shes going >she thanks me and then mentions im really strong carrying all these books >think she's retarded because she wasnt even struggling when carrying them so she shouldnt be impressed but after a couple of minutes realize she's probably flirting >almost coom >decide to joke around and tell her Im strong enough I could totally r--- her and there's nothing she could do about it >she doesn't laugh but she asks for her books back and tells me she can go alone from here since it's kind of a long way and doesn't want to bother me >be confusedand tell her i literally have nothing else to do so I could walk her all the way >she says she's better alone so follow her for a bit to make sure she's safe >she's walking normally but see her quickly reach one of those emergency boxes around campus and press the button multiple times >realize she's probably taking the joke out of context and is going to accuse me of trying to r--- her >cant deal with this s--- right now so run away I f------ hate women anons

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