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Anon is a peasant | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Skyrim 04/26/22(Tue)00:32:20 No.596970089 >Be me >Be a random nord peasant >Chilling and drinking some mead in my small house >6 foot tall reptile breaks in and f------ ransacks what little s----- possesions I own 6 KB JPG >Kills my wife just to take a few coins >Try to fight him back >F----- yells at me in some f----- language with enough force to send me flying into the wall >Guards come in and he pays them off >Summons magic ghost horse >Refuses to elaborate >Leaves >Pic related
: Anonymous Skyrim 04/26/22(Tue)00:32:20 No.596970089 >Be me >Be a random nord peasant >Chilling and drinking some mead in my small house >6 foot tall reptile breaks in and f------ ransacks what little s----- possesions I own 6 KB JPG >Kills my wife just to take a few coins >Try to fight him back >F----- yells at me in some f----- language with enough force to send me flying into the wall >Guards come in and he pays them off >Summons magic ghost horse >Refuses to elaborate >Leaves >Pic related

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The good ol' days | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous The doctor discovers abscesses 07/23/18(Mon)23:32:51 No.6947029 > be me > mentor recently died, I therefore inherited his status as doctor > 7th century idk > walk past the farms on my way to the castle 149 KB PNG > see a family of peasants waiting for me > male is sick, has a big fleshy orb on his back > *notices buldge* ō>õ what's this? > "please cure my husband, he's become ill" > no clue w-- he has > sure.carvedstone > poke with doctors stick > buldge bursts > whitish cream bursts everywhere > looks like spider blood > smells like spider blood > tastes like spider blood > declare farmer possessed by spider > burned alive at the stake > king pays me godly for preventing spider disease from spreading > feelsgoodman
| Anonymous The doctor discovers abscesses 07/23/18(Mon)23:32:51 No.6947029 > be me > mentor recently died, I therefore inherited his status as doctor > 7th century idk > walk past the farms on my way to the castle 149 KB PNG > see a family of peasants waiting for me > male is sick, has a big fleshy orb on his back > *notices buldge* ō>õ what's this? > "please cure my husband, he's become ill" > no clue w-- he has > sure.carvedstone > poke with doctors stick > buldge bursts > whitish cream bursts everywhere > looks like spider blood > smells like spider blood > tastes like spider blood > declare farmer possessed by spider > burned alive at the stake > king pays me godly for preventing spider disease from spreading > feelsgoodman

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Anon is in a romcom. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)23:07:32 No.68376566 >be me >late night at the college campus >class is over so walking back home >see cutie carrying lots of books and looking at her phone >books slip and fall down >be a little socially awkward but realize this is like a f------ romcom and maybe i could finally have 7 KB JPG someone to love >pick them up and tell her I could walk her to wherever shes going >she thanks me and then mentions im really strong carrying all these books >think she's retarded because she wasnt even struggling when carrying them so she shouldnt be impressed but after a couple of minutes realize she's probably flirting >almost coom >decide to joke around and tell her Im strong enough I could totally r--- her and there's nothing she could do about it >she doesn't laugh but she asks for her books back and tells me she can go alone from here since it's kind of a long way and doesn't want to bother me >be confusedand tell her i literally have nothing else to do so I could walk her all the way >she says she's better alone so follow her for a bit to make sure she's safe >she's walking normally but see her quickly reach one of those emergency boxes around campus and press the button multiple times >realize she's probably taking the joke out of context and is going to accuse me of trying to r--- her >cant deal with this s--- right now so run away I f------ hate women anons
Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)23:07:32 No.68376566 >be me >late night at the college campus >class is over so walking back home >see cutie carrying lots of books and looking at her phone >books slip and fall down >be a little socially awkward but realize this is like a f------ romcom and maybe i could finally have 7 KB JPG someone to love >pick them up and tell her I could walk her to wherever shes going >she thanks me and then mentions im really strong carrying all these books >think she's retarded because she wasnt even struggling when carrying them so she shouldnt be impressed but after a couple of minutes realize she's probably flirting >almost coom >decide to joke around and tell her Im strong enough I could totally r--- her and there's nothing she could do about it >she doesn't laugh but she asks for her books back and tells me she can go alone from here since it's kind of a long way and doesn't want to bother me >be confusedand tell her i literally have nothing else to do so I could walk her all the way >she says she's better alone so follow her for a bit to make sure she's safe >she's walking normally but see her quickly reach one of those emergency boxes around campus and press the button multiple times >realize she's probably taking the joke out of context and is going to accuse me of trying to r--- her >cant deal with this s--- right now so run away I f------ hate women anons

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Anon plays Ace Attorney | /r/Greentext

28m (4/25 23:03) · 596954329 6 Re 1 Img · PNG · 1MB · (2048 × 1152) 2 Replies >Playing ace attorney >Press the defendant on every single sentence they say >Skip all the text because I don't care about it anyway
28m (4/25 23:03) · 596954329 6 Re 1 Img · PNG · 1MB · (2048 × 1152) 2 Replies >Playing ace attorney >Press the defendant on every single sentence they say >Skip all the text because I don't care about it anyway

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SHITTY STORYAnd she said yes! | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 54072054 3 min. ago >be me >29 >been with gf for 5 years, living with her for 3 >dinner date, plan to propose, asked bro waiter to bring ring after dessert >she seems nervous, maybe she knows what I'm planning >tears up after main course >tells me she's been cheating on me for 8 months 1.6 MB GIF >with my best friend >leaves weeping >waiter hands me a beer without comment >this was our 5th anniversary date It doesn't get better, anons. Life is indeed suffering. Maybe l'll just ask out the waiter and go full gay. Where's the tavern when you need it.
Anonymous 54072054 3 min. ago >be me >29 >been with gf for 5 years, living with her for 3 >dinner date, plan to propose, asked bro waiter to bring ring after dessert >she seems nervous, maybe she knows what I'm planning >tears up after main course >tells me she's been cheating on me for 8 months 1.6 MB GIF >with my best friend >leaves weeping >waiter hands me a beer without comment >this was our 5th anniversary date It doesn't get better, anons. Life is indeed suffering. Maybe l'll just ask out the waiter and go full gay. Where's the tavern when you need it.

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Anon likes to tell tales | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)23:12:21 No.876945433 After posting apparent CP which wasn't, the FBI raided my home 8 months later. I live in a European s-------, yet they found me. My parents were there and my neighbors saw it too. They took all devices and now, 5 months later I'm still waiting for the outcome. They are looking into every byte of data I assume. Earth 583 KB JPG My question is if I should worry. Not because of CP, which I don't have but bc of copy right violation due to watching movies/music and s---. I've had the ugliest sleepless nights. Be warned, 4chan admins are not joking. MYM PR : Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)23:13:30 No.876945492 >>876945433 (OP) # >FBI >europe s--- larp
: Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)23:12:21 No.876945433 After posting apparent CP which wasn't, the FBI raided my home 8 months later. I live in a European s-------, yet they found me. My parents were there and my neighbors saw it too. They took all devices and now, 5 months later I'm still waiting for the outcome. They are looking into every byte of data I assume. Earth 583 KB JPG My question is if I should worry. Not because of CP, which I don't have but bc of copy right violation due to watching movies/music and s---. I've had the ugliest sleepless nights. Be warned, 4chan admins are not joking. MYM PR : Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)23:13:30 No.876945492 >>876945433 (OP) # >FBI >europe s--- larp

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Anon orders a doll | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)15:23:53 No.848410707 so i ordered this doll online and put a jessie james fleshlight inside it and i've been f------ it for a couple of weeks mom found it help what do i do she's talking on the phone and crying i'm 28 years old 126 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)15:26:32 No.848410832 >>848410707 (OP) # W.. .. why.. did you do that Anon? 29 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)15:23:53 No.848410707 so i ordered this doll online and put a jessie james fleshlight inside it and i've been f------ it for a couple of weeks mom found it help what do i do she's talking on the phone and crying i'm 28 years old 126 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)15:26:32 No.848410832 >>848410707 (OP) # W.. .. why.. did you do that Anon? 29 KB JPG

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Anon didn't "come" here to feel. | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)16:46:57 No.68372251 >have a huge cancer fetish >follow one girl's treatment journey on YouTube and social media >a lot of good fapping >she disappears for over two months >in memoriam vid is posted I came here to masturbate, not to feel ;-; 64 KB JPG
| Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)16:46:57 No.68372251 >have a huge cancer fetish >follow one girl's treatment journey on YouTube and social media >a lot of good fapping >she disappears for over two months >in memoriam vid is posted I came here to masturbate, not to feel ;-; 64 KB JPG

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Anon watches netflix | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)02:32:53 No.86660402 >Be me >Year is 2029 >Want to watch a movie on Netflix >Have to answer dumb questions before watching anything >"How many people are currently watching?" 90 KB JPG >Answer 69, because funny number >OhNo.wav >Screen flashes red >Cops with riot gear get sent to my house >they kill my dog >mfw
: Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)02:32:53 No.86660402 >Be me >Year is 2029 >Want to watch a movie on Netflix >Have to answer dumb questions before watching anything >"How many people are currently watching?" 90 KB JPG >Answer 69, because funny number >OhNo.wav >Screen flashes red >Cops with riot gear get sent to my house >they kill my dog >mfw

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Anon sees a bird | /r/Greentext


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#BlackLivesMatterAnon gets a new gaming buddy | /r/Greentext


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Anon Acts Towards his Dreams | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)15:01:30 No.66508857 >Be me >Alone at mall buying s--- >See adorable redhead girl sitting down on a bench by herself >Go up to her >"Hey excuse me miss are you pregnant?" 45 KB JPG >"Umm no." >"| can fix that" | say in my ladies man voice. >She gets all awkward in a cute way and laughs >We keep talking >Take her back to my place and f--- >She c--- twice >l c-- twice >Amazing sex >She moans louder than any woman l've been with >Wake up >l came in my sleep >Bed is dirty with my c-- >l realize l'm still a skinny fat loser >After I put my bed sheets in the washer and take a shower I start doing push ups and s--- because I ain't gonna just let this dream be a dream Wish me luck bros.
: Anonymous 04/25/22(Mon)15:01:30 No.66508857 >Be me >Alone at mall buying s--- >See adorable redhead girl sitting down on a bench by herself >Go up to her >"Hey excuse me miss are you pregnant?" 45 KB JPG >"Umm no." >"| can fix that" | say in my ladies man voice. >She gets all awkward in a cute way and laughs >We keep talking >Take her back to my place and f--- >She c--- twice >l c-- twice >Amazing sex >She moans louder than any woman l've been with >Wake up >l came in my sleep >Bed is dirty with my c-- >l realize l'm still a skinny fat loser >After I put my bed sheets in the washer and take a shower I start doing push ups and s--- because I ain't gonna just let this dream be a dream Wish me luck bros.

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anon is smart | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/29/19(Fri)00:37:59 No.55559170 i have a 2000 word assignment due tomorrow and so far i've written one paragraph GLAD YOU COULD JOIN ME, MR. BOND 57 KB JPG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 11/29/19(Fri)00:40:40 No.55559204 why don't they let you use 2019 word
: Anonymous 11/29/19(Fri)00:37:59 No.55559170 i have a 2000 word assignment due tomorrow and so far i've written one paragraph GLAD YOU COULD JOIN ME, MR. BOND 57 KB JPG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 11/29/19(Fri)00:40:40 No.55559204 why don't they let you use 2019 word

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anon searches a trap | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/09/21(Tue)17:00:19 No.846977777 > be me, closeted bisexual > mostly into grils, but have a thing for traps > decide to find a trap irl > go on Grindr, swipe left until I find a cute femboy > we start talking and sharing nudes, body is surprisingly feminine for a trap 356 KB JPG > he wants to meet up > itsHappening.exe > show up, hes shorter than me and petite, just how I like em > get up to bedroom and start making out > he stops, "Anon, I have to tell you something" > "It's cool, I know you have a d---" > "Actually Anon, I'm ftm. I dont have a d---" > mfw, it's actually a chick > mfw, I got reversed traped
: Anonymous 02/09/21(Tue)17:00:19 No.846977777 > be me, closeted bisexual > mostly into grils, but have a thing for traps > decide to find a trap irl > go on Grindr, swipe left until I find a cute femboy > we start talking and sharing nudes, body is surprisingly feminine for a trap 356 KB JPG > he wants to meet up > itsHappening.exe > show up, hes shorter than me and petite, just how I like em > get up to bedroom and start making out > he stops, "Anon, I have to tell you something" > "It's cool, I know you have a d---" > "Actually Anon, I'm ftm. I dont have a d---" > mfw, it's actually a chick > mfw, I got reversed traped

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Anon lays it out | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: KLJMCmBt) 12/14/21(Tue)14:30:40 No.352130638 Forbes @Forbes · Dec 13 F #BREAKING: Biden won't extend student loan relief trib.al/JY7YJBF ** 2.3K t7 18.2K 4K 1632888583859.png 450 KB PNG >I will forgive $50k in student loans >no wait, I'll forgive $10k in student loans >okay maybe not that, but i'll extend the loan pause Trump implemented >okay its been long enough, go back to paying off your debt, buckos
: Anonymous (ID: KLJMCmBt) 12/14/21(Tue)14:30:40 No.352130638 Forbes @Forbes · Dec 13 F #BREAKING: Biden won't extend student loan relief trib.al/JY7YJBF ** 2.3K t7 18.2K 4K 1632888583859.png 450 KB PNG >I will forgive $50k in student loans >no wait, I'll forgive $10k in student loans >okay maybe not that, but i'll extend the loan pause Trump implemented >okay its been long enough, go back to paying off your debt, buckos

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anon gets a 3d printer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous high school stories edition 04/25/22(Mon)21:51:24 No.68371519 Give me your best stories from high school. I'll go first. >be me >14 >get 3d-printer for birthday last year >start trying to sell 3d printed 4 KB JPG balisong knifes >sell around 50 to some sophomores >a couple of days later and the police is out in the hallway, talking about my knifes with the people i sold them to >got out with just a scare, nothing more >mfw the teacher tells me that what i did was really cool but i have to stop 5 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous high school stories edition 04/25/22(Mon)21:51:24 No.68371519 Give me your best stories from high school. I'll go first. >be me >14 >get 3d-printer for birthday last year >start trying to sell 3d printed 4 KB JPG balisong knifes >sell around 50 to some sophomores >a couple of days later and the police is out in the hallway, talking about my knifes with the people i sold them to >got out with just a scare, nothing more >mfw the teacher tells me that what i did was really cool but i have to stop 5 Replies View Thread

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anon doesnt get it | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous If you're a woman, why don't y(...) 04/25/22(Mon)15:07:50 No.68366477 Amouranth has now said she makes $1.4-1.5 million a month from her fully clothed pictures on OF. If you're a woman, why are you not doing the same? At least 1/3 to 1/2 of white/Asian/Hispanic women could 120 KB JPG look like her with gym and a boob/nose job. You could make more money in a year than 99% of people make in a lifetime. Why are you not doing this yourself? I meet hot young women who are working $15/hour in reception jobs, etc. Why are they doing this s--- when they could be making millions a year? Can anyone explain?
: Anonymous If you're a woman, why don't y(...) 04/25/22(Mon)15:07:50 No.68366477 Amouranth has now said she makes $1.4-1.5 million a month from her fully clothed pictures on OF. If you're a woman, why are you not doing the same? At least 1/3 to 1/2 of white/Asian/Hispanic women could 120 KB JPG look like her with gym and a boob/nose job. You could make more money in a year than 99% of people make in a lifetime. Why are you not doing this yourself? I meet hot young women who are working $15/hour in reception jobs, etc. Why are they doing this s--- when they could be making millions a year? Can anyone explain?

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We were going to build our lives together | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/25/16(Tue)20:11:08 No.75697195 hqdefault_0.jpg 11 KB JPG >oh, you're sad because a girl at your high-school doesn't like you back? Peter, when I was your age, I left school to bullseye g---- from a helicopter in the middle of some god forsaken jungle. Don't tell me you have it hard because you're a pathetic kissless virgin. You can act sad when you have to leave behind the lady-boy you fell in love with and made passionate steamy love to in a collapsing bamboo shack, just like I did. You think I felt good about firebombing his chink village and watching our f----hut burn to the ground? We were going to build our lives together there, Peter! You know what? F--- you. Get the f--- out of my car. >>75697234 # >>75697332 # >>75698895# >>75702735 #
: Anonymous 10/25/16(Tue)20:11:08 No.75697195 hqdefault_0.jpg 11 KB JPG >oh, you're sad because a girl at your high-school doesn't like you back? Peter, when I was your age, I left school to bullseye g---- from a helicopter in the middle of some god forsaken jungle. Don't tell me you have it hard because you're a pathetic kissless virgin. You can act sad when you have to leave behind the lady-boy you fell in love with and made passionate steamy love to in a collapsing bamboo shack, just like I did. You think I felt good about firebombing his chink village and watching our f----hut burn to the ground? We were going to build our lives together there, Peter! You know what? F--- you. Get the f--- out of my car. >>75697234 # >>75697332 # >>75698895# >>75702735 #

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anon goes to the gym | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous ITT: Gym thots 08/11/20(Tue)13:43:54 No.56899074 share stories involving gym thots in this thread. 998 KB WEBM : Anonymous 08/11/20(Tue)13:45:16 No.56899099 Sure, once f----- this slutty milf in the gym bathroom. The gyms name was your house and I f----- your mom, great workout >>56899144 # >>56899156 # >>56899775 # >>56900720 # >>56900894 # >>5 2711%# >>56903933 # >>56903996 # >>56905223 # >>56905227 # >>56906124 # >>56906536 # >>56908484 # >>56908840 # >>56909199 # >>56909496 # >>56909504 # >>56909611 # >>56910298 # >>56910389 # >>56910569 #
: Anonymous ITT: Gym thots 08/11/20(Tue)13:43:54 No.56899074 share stories involving gym thots in this thread. 998 KB WEBM : Anonymous 08/11/20(Tue)13:45:16 No.56899099 Sure, once f----- this slutty milf in the gym bathroom. The gyms name was your house and I f----- your mom, great workout >>56899144 # >>56899156 # >>56899775 # >>56900720 # >>56900894 # >>5 2711%# >>56903933 # >>56903996 # >>56905223 # >>56905227 # >>56906124 # >>56906536 # >>56908484 # >>56908840 # >>56909199 # >>56909496 # >>56909504 # >>56909611 # >>56910298 # >>56910389 # >>56910569 #

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Anon likes to be mommies boy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/08/22(Tue)10:29:37 No.874016056 >be me >going to have a drink with gf >pick her up from home >her dad says:"l'd say take care of her, but I know she's taking care of you haha" >l'm not even ashamed it's true lol 11 KB JPG >one night we bumped into my bully and he greeted me by insulting me as usual and she straight out punched his throat >instantly got a boner >she doesn't even look like a lesbian, she looks extremely feminin >f--- this is so hot
: Anonymous 03/08/22(Tue)10:29:37 No.874016056 >be me >going to have a drink with gf >pick her up from home >her dad says:"l'd say take care of her, but I know she's taking care of you haha" >l'm not even ashamed it's true lol 11 KB JPG >one night we bumped into my bully and he greeted me by insulting me as usual and she straight out punched his throat >instantly got a boner >she doesn't even look like a lesbian, she looks extremely feminin >f--- this is so hot

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