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each burger is less than a dollar each | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/02/17(Fri)21:42:54 No.9005626 nuggets.jpg 478 KB JPG What is your largest fast food order? Anonymous 06/03/17(Sat)00:25:47 No.9006160 >>9005626 (OP) i was in the phillipines and ordered 30 yum burgers from jollibees because they were so cheap my action caused a huge scene because i was in a remote city that rarely sees white people, and the magnitude of burgers i ordered >>9006183 # 229006205 # Anonymous 06/03/17(Sat)00:45:01 No.9006205 >>9006160 >Never see a white person in all 35 years of your life >Hear stories about how much they eat >Think that impossible, nobody could stomach that much! >One day, skinny white man arrives >Astounding! >What a novelty! >But surely the rumors must be false, see how thin he is >Follow him into local Jollibees to confirm >He orders 30 f------ burgers >3 f------ 0 >Go home to wife >Tell her we must sell everything >Need to open hotdog stand in America >We will be fabulously wealthy
Anonymous 06/02/17(Fri)21:42:54 No.9005626 nuggets.jpg 478 KB JPG What is your largest fast food order? Anonymous 06/03/17(Sat)00:25:47 No.9006160 >>9005626 (OP) i was in the phillipines and ordered 30 yum burgers from jollibees because they were so cheap my action caused a huge scene because i was in a remote city that rarely sees white people, and the magnitude of burgers i ordered >>9006183 # 229006205 # Anonymous 06/03/17(Sat)00:45:01 No.9006205 >>9006160 >Never see a white person in all 35 years of your life >Hear stories about how much they eat >Think that impossible, nobody could stomach that much! >One day, skinny white man arrives >Astounding! >What a novelty! >But surely the rumors must be false, see how thin he is >Follow him into local Jollibees to confirm >He orders 30 f------ burgers >3 f------ 0 >Go home to wife >Tell her we must sell everything >Need to open hotdog stand in America >We will be fabulously wealthy

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Anon wants a peaceful life | /r/Greentext

04/08/22(Fri)20:18:19 No.68127114 : Anonymous i want to go to nuuk >bored >looking at countries on google maps >start looking for most remote areas 72 KB JPG >come across nuuk, a city in greenland, though it looks more like a small town >looks beautiful >come across a subreddit dedicated to it with less than 200 users >look at the photos people posted, they look so comfy and friendly >can imagine myself living there in a small house, making friends, enjoying the snow >no war, no politics, just a small town away from everyone else >fall in love with this town knowing damn well i'll never step foot in it pic related, its nuuk
04/08/22(Fri)20:18:19 No.68127114 : Anonymous i want to go to nuuk >bored >looking at countries on google maps >start looking for most remote areas 72 KB JPG >come across nuuk, a city in greenland, though it looks more like a small town >looks beautiful >come across a subreddit dedicated to it with less than 200 users >look at the photos people posted, they look so comfy and friendly >can imagine myself living there in a small house, making friends, enjoying the snow >no war, no politics, just a small town away from everyone else >fall in love with this town knowing damn well i'll never step foot in it pic related, its nuuk

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Anon is a NEET | /r/Greentext

05/19/21 (Wed)13:59:55 No.854808563 Anonymous >born into this world without my consent >want NEET life but not rich and no friends or family >decide to find a way to NEET 541 KB PNG >leave wallet and all forms of ID at home >no ID, no money, nothing. I am basically a ghost now >go to walmart >lay down in isle >don't move or respond to anything >eventually cops/ambulance will be called >they arrive and take me away, but still not responding, just doing absolutely nothing >they can't discharge me from hospital or from jail since they don't know who I am or where I live >can't just leave me outside to die >they are forced to take care of me >all while I just lay there and do nothing >the perfect NEET life 10 Replies View Thread
05/19/21 (Wed)13:59:55 No.854808563 Anonymous >born into this world without my consent >want NEET life but not rich and no friends or family >decide to find a way to NEET 541 KB PNG >leave wallet and all forms of ID at home >no ID, no money, nothing. I am basically a ghost now >go to walmart >lay down in isle >don't move or respond to anything >eventually cops/ambulance will be called >they arrive and take me away, but still not responding, just doing absolutely nothing >they can't discharge me from hospital or from jail since they don't know who I am or where I live >can't just leave me outside to die >they are forced to take care of me >all while I just lay there and do nothing >the perfect NEET life 10 Replies View Thread

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anon fails to be a chad | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/29/18(Tue)12:49:54 No.45755456 YgmcQik.jpg 46 KB JPG >try to get a Chad haircut >comes out looking like pic related What the f--- am I doing wrong? I went to a proper hair stylist that cost $100. Should I shave it all off?
Anonymous 05/29/18(Tue)12:49:54 No.45755456 YgmcQik.jpg 46 KB JPG >try to get a Chad haircut >comes out looking like pic related What the f--- am I doing wrong? I went to a proper hair stylist that cost $100. Should I shave it all off?

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Anon on Cr1TiKaL. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/20/22(Fri)23:48:11 No.68714289 1 8 KB JPG >hey guys it's critical >today we are taking yet another clip from my live stream of me watching a youtube video that somebody else made and getting a million views for what little I add in words with my boring dry tired voice >also, for comedic effect, I will stretch the image on the youtube thumbnail for the billionth time >please laugh
Anonymous 05/20/22(Fri)23:48:11 No.68714289 1 8 KB JPG >hey guys it's critical >today we are taking yet another clip from my live stream of me watching a youtube video that somebody else made and getting a million views for what little I add in words with my boring dry tired voice >also, for comedic effect, I will stretch the image on the youtube thumbnail for the billionth time >please laugh

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Anon has a realization | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 17 KB PNG 05/20/22 (Fri)23:24:18 No.878548961 >for a website that is supposed to be homophobic, I really have seen some of the gayest s--- ever on here
: Anonymous 17 KB PNG 05/20/22 (Fri)23:24:18 No.878548961 >for a website that is supposed to be homophobic, I really have seen some of the gayest s--- ever on here

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Something’s wrong with anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 88 KB JPG 05/20/22(Fri)15:35:33 No.68711164 why can't i stand for 15 minutes without finding it hard to breathe and feeling like i'm going to pass out? and no, i'm not fat. is this covid? i feel normal when i'm just sitting View Thread 05/20/22 (Fri) 15:39:46 No.68711216 3 Replies : Anonymous >>68711164 (OP) # go ask your doctor a------ >>68711227 #
: Anonymous 88 KB JPG 05/20/22(Fri)15:35:33 No.68711164 why can't i stand for 15 minutes without finding it hard to breathe and feeling like i'm going to pass out? and no, i'm not fat. is this covid? i feel normal when i'm just sitting View Thread 05/20/22 (Fri) 15:39:46 No.68711216 3 Replies : Anonymous >>68711164 (OP) # go ask your doctor a------ >>68711227 #

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The joos have figured out how to fool the big guy. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/02/12 (Fri) 17:39 No. 1921453 If only you knew how bad things really are >Be a Jew >Sin all year >Transfer your sins to a chicken >Torture the chicken and kill it >The chicken goes to hell instead of you >Yay! we fooled God nxs rungra
Anonymous 03/02/12 (Fri) 17:39 No. 1921453 If only you knew how bad things really are >Be a Jew >Sin all year >Transfer your sins to a chicken >Torture the chicken and kill it >The chicken goes to hell instead of you >Yay! we fooled God nxs rungra

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anon sells pisswater | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >be me >on some sketchy black market site >idea.png >sell loli bath water 74 KB JPG >its just me pissing in a tub of water and mixing it around >sell it for 50$ a jar >mfw profit >mfw pedos are drinking my piss >mfw one of them might have aids cause i let my friend with aids piss in it doing gods work here 11/07/21(Sun)18:45:13 No.866276836
Anonymous >be me >on some sketchy black market site >idea.png >sell loli bath water 74 KB JPG >its just me pissing in a tub of water and mixing it around >sell it for 50$ a jar >mfw profit >mfw pedos are drinking my piss >mfw one of them might have aids cause i let my friend with aids piss in it doing gods work here 11/07/21(Sun)18:45:13 No.866276836

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Anon finds love | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/08/19(Fri)17:38:28 No.792141603 >seeing some girl recently >go to her house to f--- her again >while we are cuddling ask her what's on her mind >tells me that she likes me >tell her I like her too 410 KB PNG >tells me how she likes to kiss me, hold me, how she likes me eyes, my laugh, the way I talk >we don't fall asleep until 5am >leave her house around 7am >keeps saying she doesn't want me to go >driving back to my place the feelings hit me >tfw you've been emotionally deprived for the first 19 years of your life >tfw you thought you would end up alone and a loser but you managed to turn out just fine >tfw you realize you aren't alone in this world >tfw you matter to someone It's a feeling that is warmer than heroin /b/
Anonymous 02/08/19(Fri)17:38:28 No.792141603 >seeing some girl recently >go to her house to f--- her again >while we are cuddling ask her what's on her mind >tells me that she likes me >tell her I like her too 410 KB PNG >tells me how she likes to kiss me, hold me, how she likes me eyes, my laugh, the way I talk >we don't fall asleep until 5am >leave her house around 7am >keeps saying she doesn't want me to go >driving back to my place the feelings hit me >tfw you've been emotionally deprived for the first 19 years of your life >tfw you thought you would end up alone and a loser but you managed to turn out just fine >tfw you realize you aren't alone in this world >tfw you matter to someone It's a feeling that is warmer than heroin /b/

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So scary you guys | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/07/17(Fri)13:36:40 No.81360206 img0465.jpg 248 KB JPG >>81355768 (OP) # sometimes i masturbate in bushes in a public park. one day i notice a person behing me. it was tom cruise. all he said was "proceed". i felt uncomfortable and took a picture and left.
: Anonymous 04/07/17(Fri)13:36:40 No.81360206 img0465.jpg 248 KB JPG >>81355768 (OP) # sometimes i masturbate in bushes in a public park. one day i notice a person behing me. it was tom cruise. all he said was "proceed". i felt uncomfortable and took a picture and left.

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Anon bit the hand that fed them. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/19(Fri)08:45:18 No.792708139 >be me >transgender >start hormones and start developing t--- >they are hairy as f--- endocrinologist if it will ever >ask stop 408 KB JPG >he says no and that i need laser >it costs a fortune Wat do /b/? : Anonymous 02/15/19(Fri)08:47:01 No.792708238 >try to spit in the face of God >Become genetic abomination Things seem to be taking their natural course OP
: Anonymous 02/15/19(Fri)08:45:18 No.792708139 >be me >transgender >start hormones and start developing t--- >they are hairy as f--- endocrinologist if it will ever >ask stop 408 KB JPG >he says no and that i need laser >it costs a fortune Wat do /b/? : Anonymous 02/15/19(Fri)08:47:01 No.792708238 >try to spit in the face of God >Become genetic abomination Things seem to be taking their natural course OP

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Very useful advice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue) 18:58:16 No.8585129 >roommate asks me to drive him to his dealer >sure, I have nothing going on >get in, start the car, put on seatbelt 8 KB JPG >notice roommate doesn't have his seatbelt on >ask him to put it on >"Why? Aren't you a good driver?" >tell him it's my car and I want him to have his seatbelt on >"lol f--- you man just drive" >okay >get on the road, accelerate to 40mph >slam on the brakes >roommate flies out of his seat, his face hits the windshield >oh s---, sorry bro. Maybe you should put your f------ seatbelt on >he does >I turn the car around and drive us back home F------ f----- can walk to his dealer's now. Wear your seatbelts.
: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue) 18:58:16 No.8585129 >roommate asks me to drive him to his dealer >sure, I have nothing going on >get in, start the car, put on seatbelt 8 KB JPG >notice roommate doesn't have his seatbelt on >ask him to put it on >"Why? Aren't you a good driver?" >tell him it's my car and I want him to have his seatbelt on >"lol f--- you man just drive" >okay >get on the road, accelerate to 40mph >slam on the brakes >roommate flies out of his seat, his face hits the windshield >oh s---, sorry bro. Maybe you should put your f------ seatbelt on >he does >I turn the car around and drive us back home F------ f----- can walk to his dealer's now. Wear your seatbelts.

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Anon is a pioneer | /r/Greentext

CoolCola: Russia Launches Coca-Cola, Fanta and Sprite Alternatives After Soda Exodus Updated one day ago C S COOLCOLA FANCY STREET : Anonymous 05/17/22(Tue)18:10:55 No.17856320 >>17856308 (OP) # >born too late to enjoy peak Western civilization >born to early to explore the cosmos >born just in time to become an international beverage smuggler KIED 118 CO
CoolCola: Russia Launches Coca-Cola, Fanta and Sprite Alternatives After Soda Exodus Updated one day ago C S COOLCOLA FANCY STREET : Anonymous 05/17/22(Tue)18:10:55 No.17856320 >>17856308 (OP) # >born too late to enjoy peak Western civilization >born to early to explore the cosmos >born just in time to become an international beverage smuggler KIED 118 CO

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Anon graduates highschool | /r/Greentext

>be 18, just graduated hs today >go to graduation ceremony >am not in contact with any classmates, only ever had acquaintances >everyone theres knows eachother >i stand around like an asocial autist for the whole time >mom and dad driving me home after >they ask why i dont have any friends >mom starts tearing up >she gives me a f------ lecture on why communication is so important it feels bad being this much of a loser
>be 18, just graduated hs today >go to graduation ceremony >am not in contact with any classmates, only ever had acquaintances >everyone theres knows eachother >i stand around like an asocial autist for the whole time >mom and dad driving me home after >they ask why i dont have any friends >mom starts tearing up >she gives me a f------ lecture on why communication is so important it feels bad being this much of a loser

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Anon is monke | /r/Greentext

01/09/21 (Sat)21:22:46 No.844438848 : Anonymous >at the zoo >decide to take guided tour since one is about to start >lady asks if there's any qustions before the tour begins 244 KB PNG >guy in the background screams "YEA WHERE ARE THE MONKEYS AT?!" >everyone stares at him >lady says all of the primates are in the jungle exhibit on the other side of the zoo >guy takes off into a full sprint towards the monkeys >about an hour later >tour catches up to guy in front of the chimpanzees >he's bobbing his head in sync with all the chimps whilst howling
01/09/21 (Sat)21:22:46 No.844438848 : Anonymous >at the zoo >decide to take guided tour since one is about to start >lady asks if there's any qustions before the tour begins 244 KB PNG >guy in the background screams "YEA WHERE ARE THE MONKEYS AT?!" >everyone stares at him >lady says all of the primates are in the jungle exhibit on the other side of the zoo >guy takes off into a full sprint towards the monkeys >about an hour later >tour catches up to guy in front of the chimpanzees >he's bobbing his head in sync with all the chimps whilst howling

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Anon is a rapper. | /r/Greentext

04/06/18(Fri)21:03:40 No.765096120 : Anonymous Well... >Be me >Amateur rapper >Spend hours daily writing verses >Finally get a show 79 KB JPG >Fuckyesnotgonnabeawagecuck.midi >Night of the show >Get really f------ tense when I see the crowd must be like 200 people there >forget all my f------ lines >Mfw >Awkwardly start to mumble what I think my lines are into the microphone >THEY F------ START SCREAMING WITH EXCITEMENT >mfw the last few years of my life have been a waste of time when I could have mumbled f------ anything and been rly successful
04/06/18(Fri)21:03:40 No.765096120 : Anonymous Well... >Be me >Amateur rapper >Spend hours daily writing verses >Finally get a show 79 KB JPG >Fuckyesnotgonnabeawagecuck.midi >Night of the show >Get really f------ tense when I see the crowd must be like 200 people there >forget all my f------ lines >Mfw >Awkwardly start to mumble what I think my lines are into the microphone >THEY F------ START SCREAMING WITH EXCITEMENT >mfw the last few years of my life have been a waste of time when I could have mumbled f------ anything and been rly successful

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Anon has a point. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/20/22(Fri)08:14:43 No.68704229 >Women's hobbies: >Travel, shopping, reading, traveling, working, investing, yoga >Men's hobbies >moping about women on a website for 36 KB JPG virgins >video games (lol) You "men" need to make yourself interesting and less pathetic if you want a girlfriend. Anonymous >>68704229 (OP) >Travel >traveling subtle 05/20/22(Fri)08:17:30 No.68704249
Anonymous 05/20/22(Fri)08:14:43 No.68704229 >Women's hobbies: >Travel, shopping, reading, traveling, working, investing, yoga >Men's hobbies >moping about women on a website for 36 KB JPG virgins >video games (lol) You "men" need to make yourself interesting and less pathetic if you want a girlfriend. Anonymous >>68704229 (OP) >Travel >traveling subtle 05/20/22(Fri)08:17:30 No.68704249

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Pop secret | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/20/22(Fri)09:37:25 No.68704913 why do people think its okay to be gay >be me >reading a book by a supposedly asexual author >scene where a character licks a popsicle comes on 6 KB JPG >I kid you not it's structured exactly like a sex scene >put the book down and start exercising so that I don't lose my nofap streak I feel like for a person who claims to be asexual this guys knows a bit too much about human sexuality. : Anonymous 05/20/22(Fri)09:46:23 No.68705006 >>68704913 (OP) # >be OP >reading a book hmmm >overly horny from years of pent up sexual frustration 134 cham 62 KB PNG >"[insert character here] licks a popsicle" >OMG-THIS-IS-JUST-LIKE-THE-SEX.webm >make this terrible thread 3:04
: Anonymous 05/20/22(Fri)09:37:25 No.68704913 why do people think its okay to be gay >be me >reading a book by a supposedly asexual author >scene where a character licks a popsicle comes on 6 KB JPG >I kid you not it's structured exactly like a sex scene >put the book down and start exercising so that I don't lose my nofap streak I feel like for a person who claims to be asexual this guys knows a bit too much about human sexuality. : Anonymous 05/20/22(Fri)09:46:23 No.68705006 >>68704913 (OP) # >be OP >reading a book hmmm >overly horny from years of pent up sexual frustration 134 cham 62 KB PNG >"[insert character here] licks a popsicle" >OMG-THIS-IS-JUST-LIKE-THE-SEX.webm >make this terrible thread 3:04

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barely greentextGermany vs Israel 2 Electric Boogaloo | /r/Greentext

No.87571996 11 hours ago Germany >Jurgen WHY THE F--- CANT YOU JUST WRITE JUERGEN ITS F------ JUERGEN IF YOU DONT HAVE AN UMLAUT HIS NAME IS NOT JURGEN 25 replies No.87572151 11 hours ago Israel >>87571996 how about killing yourself you disgusting germ*n 24 replies No.87572244 11 hours ago Germany >>87572151 how about you leave through the chimney like your grandpa 32 replies 800 ... ...
No.87571996 11 hours ago Germany >Jurgen WHY THE F--- CANT YOU JUST WRITE JUERGEN ITS F------ JUERGEN IF YOU DONT HAVE AN UMLAUT HIS NAME IS NOT JURGEN 25 replies No.87572151 11 hours ago Israel >>87571996 how about killing yourself you disgusting germ*n 24 replies No.87572244 11 hours ago Germany >>87572151 how about you leave through the chimney like your grandpa 32 replies 800 ... ...

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