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: Anonymous 05/29/22(Sun)14:15:08 No.68829925 >be a loser in highschool >get bullied by a typical american movie bully >not a single day goes by without being stolen lunch money or kicked in the ass 8 KB JPG >can't fight back because of manlet reasons >best I can do is hoping karma will get him or he gets cancer and dies an agony death >fast forward 8 years >quit a job recently, find a new place >stumble upon a company >president Mr.Bully the ass kicker >h-------- it's him >tfw he inherited his dad's company >tfw he's a millionaire >tfw he's still fit af and doesn't have cancer >meanwhile I'm still a $15/hr wagie dear Christian if there is god then explain this
: Anonymous 05/29/22(Sun)14:15:08 No.68829925 >be a loser in highschool >get bullied by a typical american movie bully >not a single day goes by without being stolen lunch money or kicked in the ass 8 KB JPG >can't fight back because of manlet reasons >best I can do is hoping karma will get him or he gets cancer and dies an agony death >fast forward 8 years >quit a job recently, find a new place >stumble upon a company >president Mr.Bully the ass kicker >h-------- it's him >tfw he inherited his dad's company >tfw he's a millionaire >tfw he's still fit af and doesn't have cancer >meanwhile I'm still a $15/hr wagie dear Christian if there is god then explain this

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Happy bday anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/09/18 (Wed)08:26:39 No.45260623 I have birthday today. It's the saddest, the most depressing, the loneliest birthday I've ever had to this point. The only person that has wished me a happy birthday is my sister. No online friends nothing. Planned on having huge m----------- session with a prostate massager and it didn't come on time. I have huge anxiety and I'm running out of valerian. What should I do :( 75 KB PNG 19 Replies / 5 Images View Thread Anonymous 05/09/18 (Wed)10:47:25 No.45262866 hop borthday from al qaeda 15 KB JPG
Anonymous 05/09/18 (Wed)08:26:39 No.45260623 I have birthday today. It's the saddest, the most depressing, the loneliest birthday I've ever had to this point. The only person that has wished me a happy birthday is my sister. No online friends nothing. Planned on having huge m----------- session with a prostate massager and it didn't come on time. I have huge anxiety and I'm running out of valerian. What should I do :( 75 KB PNG 19 Replies / 5 Images View Thread Anonymous 05/09/18 (Wed)10:47:25 No.45262866 hop borthday from al qaeda 15 KB JPG

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Anon is disillusioned | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/29/22(Sun)21:26:31 No.879125985 >be me >23 year old man >I have a bachelor's degree Looking for a job >I can't get a job despite applying to anything I can find 67 KB JPG >could only get jobs working at FedEx, Cheesecake Factory, and Sbarro >still living with my parents >parents keep asking me when I'll get a job >dad thinks I need to attend graduate school and get a master's degree >I'd still be jobless with a master's degree and 100,000 dollars in student-loan debt >they think I'm not trying hard enough >reality is I don't know what to do anymore >feel jaded >waste my days jacking off and watching TV At least I didn't have to take out any loans. At this point I'm genuinely considering a trade-school. Maybe become a mechanic. What the hell is the point in any of this? At this point I just want to give up and reject society and become a f------ bum. Everything feels like a joke to me now and I hate it.
: Anonymous 05/29/22(Sun)21:26:31 No.879125985 >be me >23 year old man >I have a bachelor's degree Looking for a job >I can't get a job despite applying to anything I can find 67 KB JPG >could only get jobs working at FedEx, Cheesecake Factory, and Sbarro >still living with my parents >parents keep asking me when I'll get a job >dad thinks I need to attend graduate school and get a master's degree >I'd still be jobless with a master's degree and 100,000 dollars in student-loan debt >they think I'm not trying hard enough >reality is I don't know what to do anymore >feel jaded >waste my days jacking off and watching TV At least I didn't have to take out any loans. At this point I'm genuinely considering a trade-school. Maybe become a mechanic. What the hell is the point in any of this? At this point I just want to give up and reject society and become a f------ bum. Everything feels like a joke to me now and I hate it.

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America vs Europe | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/12/22(Thu)21:17:51 No.598741725 # >>598740946 compared to anyone America: >financial capital of the world >best food in the world >most powerful country on Earth >saved the world twice >the smartest and most attractive people from every other country decide to live here instead Europe: >some stinky old buildings >le napoleon (literally) >stupid languages, everybody has to learn english to actually communicate anyway >"we stored this cheese in a cave and injected it with mold until it started to smell like rotten feet, Americans will never have haute cuisine like this" >healthcare so s--- they literally give it away for free >>598742287 # >>598742409 # >>598742775 # : Anonymous 05/12/22(Thu)21:21:04 No.598742031 >>598742774 # : Anonymous 05/12/22(Thu)21:24:01 No.598742287 >>598741725 # the c-------- shop down the street from my house is older than your country and you think you get a seat at the table to talk about history and culture 149 KB JPG >>598742606 #
: Anonymous 05/12/22(Thu)21:17:51 No.598741725 # >>598740946 compared to anyone America: >financial capital of the world >best food in the world >most powerful country on Earth >saved the world twice >the smartest and most attractive people from every other country decide to live here instead Europe: >some stinky old buildings >le napoleon (literally) >stupid languages, everybody has to learn english to actually communicate anyway >"we stored this cheese in a cave and injected it with mold until it started to smell like rotten feet, Americans will never have haute cuisine like this" >healthcare so s--- they literally give it away for free >>598742287 # >>598742409 # >>598742775 # : Anonymous 05/12/22(Thu)21:21:04 No.598742031 >>598742774 # : Anonymous 05/12/22(Thu)21:24:01 No.598742287 >>598741725 # the c-------- shop down the street from my house is older than your country and you think you get a seat at the table to talk about history and culture 149 KB JPG >>598742606 #

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I seriously doubt orthopedic surgeons are hanging out on 4chan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/23/18(Fri)10:10:38 No.43412282 > be me 13 years old > grew up in a f----- up home with manipulative and abusive parents > older brother quits his study in the midst of getting a PhD to get me and my little sister out of the house 38 KB JPG > living with him >haven't been happier in my life > practically saved our life > he forces me to keep my attention at school to accomplish something in my life, something he sacrificed for us > 2 years go by > he got diagnosed with pancreatic cancer > he never lost hope and always walked around with a smile > dies > 14 years of school and many degrees later > mfw I'm a certified orthopedic surgeon and I'd probably have killed myself if he wasn't there for us > i will never forget you bro
: Anonymous 02/23/18(Fri)10:10:38 No.43412282 > be me 13 years old > grew up in a f----- up home with manipulative and abusive parents > older brother quits his study in the midst of getting a PhD to get me and my little sister out of the house 38 KB JPG > living with him >haven't been happier in my life > practically saved our life > he forces me to keep my attention at school to accomplish something in my life, something he sacrificed for us > 2 years go by > he got diagnosed with pancreatic cancer > he never lost hope and always walked around with a smile > dies > 14 years of school and many degrees later > mfw I'm a certified orthopedic surgeon and I'd probably have killed myself if he wasn't there for us > i will never forget you bro

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Anon is a Cop From Uvalde Texas | /r/Greentext

>Be me, badass cop. UVALES >There's a school shooting. >Put on all of my tactical gear. Rush to the scene Meet Our S.W.A.T. Team >Gunshots from inside the school. 161 KB JPG >Kids inside the school calling 911 for help >Establish a perimeter. Parents begging us to storm the school and save their children >Tell them it is not a safe environment, police officers could get shot >Kids keep calling 911 for help >Parents get rowdy. Start screaming and trying to rush the school themselves >ITS LAW ENFORCEMENT TIME >Start screaming at parents to back up >This one guy tries rescue his kid, so I tased him >Had to handcuff a few parents for their own protection. >Good thing I got all that tactical gear. >Police Chief releases a statement that they are thankful that no officers sustained life threatening injuries >MFW everyone is mad at us. >What happened to blue lives matter?
>Be me, badass cop. UVALES >There's a school shooting. >Put on all of my tactical gear. Rush to the scene Meet Our S.W.A.T. Team >Gunshots from inside the school. 161 KB JPG >Kids inside the school calling 911 for help >Establish a perimeter. Parents begging us to storm the school and save their children >Tell them it is not a safe environment, police officers could get shot >Kids keep calling 911 for help >Parents get rowdy. Start screaming and trying to rush the school themselves >ITS LAW ENFORCEMENT TIME >Start screaming at parents to back up >This one guy tries rescue his kid, so I tased him >Had to handcuff a few parents for their own protection. >Good thing I got all that tactical gear. >Police Chief releases a statement that they are thankful that no officers sustained life threatening injuries >MFW everyone is mad at us. >What happened to blue lives matter?

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Anon gets a kiss | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 20 KB JPG 16 Replies / 4 Images : Anonymous >>63252295 (OP) # nice, you are now part of the majority of people who have herpes 04/17/21 (Sat)03:43:40 No.63252295 >kiss my first girl >get a pimple on my lips a week later >it hurts when I lick it View Thread 04/17/21 (Sat)06:46:17 No.63253675
Anonymous 20 KB JPG 16 Replies / 4 Images : Anonymous >>63252295 (OP) # nice, you are now part of the majority of people who have herpes 04/17/21 (Sat)03:43:40 No.63252295 >kiss my first girl >get a pimple on my lips a week later >it hurts when I lick it View Thread 04/17/21 (Sat)06:46:17 No.63253675

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Anon’s gf is evil | /r/Greentext

DOPAMEME APP Anonymous 12/05/19(Thu)04:16:12 No.815538141 >>815538191 >>815538268 >>815538277 >>815538347 >>815538726 >>815538732 >>815539139 >>815539154 >>815539158 >>815540977 >>815541599 >>815541683 >>815541821 >>815543040 >>815545009 >>815545761 >>815545822 >>815545873 >>815545961 >My girlfriend went through my text messages >found out I had been talking to my ex (just as friends) >she doesn't work, just lives off me for free >while I'm doing a 12 hour shift, she takes my dog buddy and hides him somewhere >she won't tell me where he is >I call several local shelters looking for him >check craigslist to see if she might have sold him >its been 2 days and my baby boy is gone >what do I do? >I'm f------ heartbroken without my boy
DOPAMEME APP Anonymous 12/05/19(Thu)04:16:12 No.815538141 >>815538191 >>815538268 >>815538277 >>815538347 >>815538726 >>815538732 >>815539139 >>815539154 >>815539158 >>815540977 >>815541599 >>815541683 >>815541821 >>815543040 >>815545009 >>815545761 >>815545822 >>815545873 >>815545961 >My girlfriend went through my text messages >found out I had been talking to my ex (just as friends) >she doesn't work, just lives off me for free >while I'm doing a 12 hour shift, she takes my dog buddy and hides him somewhere >she won't tell me where he is >I call several local shelters looking for him >check craigslist to see if she might have sold him >its been 2 days and my baby boy is gone >what do I do? >I'm f------ heartbroken without my boy

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Anon is playing mind games with his co-worker. | /r/Greentext

>assigned to do a project with a co- worker Ⓡ >whenever we do some progress or get past a roadblock say the word "stupendous" >do it for a couple weeks 451 KB PNG >co-worker eventually starts picking it up >pavlov.png >co-worker starts saying stupendous as well in the same situations >stop saying it >ffw 1 month, project pretty much done >just cleared the last bug, co-worker says stupendous >allacordingtoplan.wav >"huh? that's an unusual expression" >"what do you mean, anon? I heard it from you" >"i never used that word in my life" see you soon on the board, fellow schizo
>assigned to do a project with a co- worker Ⓡ >whenever we do some progress or get past a roadblock say the word "stupendous" >do it for a couple weeks 451 KB PNG >co-worker eventually starts picking it up >pavlov.png >co-worker starts saying stupendous as well in the same situations >stop saying it >ffw 1 month, project pretty much done >just cleared the last bug, co-worker says stupendous >allacordingtoplan.wav >"huh? that's an unusual expression" >"what do you mean, anon? I heard it from you" >"i never used that word in my life" see you soon on the board, fellow schizo

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Anon flips burgers | /r/Greentext

03/09/22(Wed)04:03:53 No.67711405 Anonymous Autism story time >be burger flipper >boss told me that I had to make sure to get orders right >"I'll have 2 number 45s, one with cheese" >"which one is with cheese sir?" >"uhh..." 44 KB PNG >"the left one please" >"your left or my left sir?" somehow I have flipped burger for 2 years
03/09/22(Wed)04:03:53 No.67711405 Anonymous Autism story time >be burger flipper >boss told me that I had to make sure to get orders right >"I'll have 2 number 45s, one with cheese" >"which one is with cheese sir?" >"uhh..." 44 KB PNG >"the left one please" >"your left or my left sir?" somehow I have flipped burger for 2 years

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Anon is a soon to be rich virgin | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/27/19(Sun)12:45:11 No.791076151 >be me, 3 years ago >already know about my future virgin life >decide to make profit of it >come to my tard friend >"bet 100$ that I'll be virgin in my 15 KB PNG 40's" >tard agrees >feelsgoodman.org >turns out another f-- heard us >"Ha-ha anon, I bet 100 bucks that you'll have children by that time" >mfw I'm gonna be rich cya later POOR virgins
: Anonymous 01/27/19(Sun)12:45:11 No.791076151 >be me, 3 years ago >already know about my future virgin life >decide to make profit of it >come to my tard friend >"bet 100$ that I'll be virgin in my 15 KB PNG 40's" >tard agrees >feelsgoodman.org >turns out another f-- heard us >"Ha-ha anon, I bet 100 bucks that you'll have children by that time" >mfw I'm gonna be rich cya later POOR virgins

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Anon makes mad cash | /r/Greentext

No.772995598 06/30/18(Sat)05:29:45 R14kkDj.jpg JPG 35.1 KiB 657x527 >be me >be in 5th grade >class is planning field trip, need money >everyone needs to bring 20 dollars >go home, ask mom for 30 dollars so I can have 10 dollars extra for myself >mom doesn't believe me, goes to friend's house who lives on the same street >ohshit.gif >comes back angry, saying I need to pay more attention in class meetings >tfw I found out my friend told his parents that he needed 50 dollars ●●● :
No.772995598 06/30/18(Sat)05:29:45 R14kkDj.jpg JPG 35.1 KiB 657x527 >be me >be in 5th grade >class is planning field trip, need money >everyone needs to bring 20 dollars >go home, ask mom for 30 dollars so I can have 10 dollars extra for myself >mom doesn't believe me, goes to friend's house who lives on the same street >ohshit.gif >comes back angry, saying I need to pay more attention in class meetings >tfw I found out my friend told his parents that he needed 50 dollars ●●● :

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Fruit of the sea | /r/Greentext

05/29/22(Sun)09:03:26 No.68826835 >be me >have watched multiple gore and shock videos >see a girl get her head cut off with a machete >noreaction.jpg >buffalo shooting livestream >looks like a call of duty : Anonymous 15 KB PNG campaign mission >be also me >watch Forrest Gump once >see Bubba die >cry like a little bitch
05/29/22(Sun)09:03:26 No.68826835 >be me >have watched multiple gore and shock videos >see a girl get her head cut off with a machete >noreaction.jpg >buffalo shooting livestream >looks like a call of duty : Anonymous 15 KB PNG campaign mission >be also me >watch Forrest Gump once >see Bubba die >cry like a little bitch

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Demonic OP | /r/Greentext

1018611.jpg) Anonymous (ID: jR83qLK5) 06/02/12(Sat)07:03:45 No.40 1) piss on a plate 2) put it in the freezer 3) wait till late at night when its frozen 4) take the piss disc off the plate 5) slide it under someone's door 6) they'll wake up to a mysterious puddle of piss on their floo 5 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
1018611.jpg) Anonymous (ID: jR83qLK5) 06/02/12(Sat)07:03:45 No.40 1) piss on a plate 2) put it in the freezer 3) wait till late at night when its frozen 4) take the piss disc off the plate 5) slide it under someone's door 6) they'll wake up to a mysterious puddle of piss on their floo 5 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.

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Hit the weak point for massive damage | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/29/22(Sun)08:10:38 No.68826433 >be 6 feet 4 inches >go to gym everyday >210 lbs of lean muscle >several times stronger than the average woman 19 KB JPG >average woman could still take me out with one light kick to my balls It freaks me out anons. Why did God give men such an exploitable weakness? No matter how strong I get, a 100 pound woman can beat me with one hit.
: Anonymous 05/29/22(Sun)08:10:38 No.68826433 >be 6 feet 4 inches >go to gym everyday >210 lbs of lean muscle >several times stronger than the average woman 19 KB JPG >average woman could still take me out with one light kick to my balls It freaks me out anons. Why did God give men such an exploitable weakness? No matter how strong I get, a 100 pound woman can beat me with one hit.

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Debtor's prison | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 206 KB JPG 05/29/22(Sun)07:23:16 No.68826077 >neet autist >no one called or text me in 10 years >get into debt and dont pay it off >now people call me 10 times a day I made it bros...
: Anonymous 206 KB JPG 05/29/22(Sun)07:23:16 No.68826077 >neet autist >no one called or text me in 10 years >get into debt and dont pay it off >now people call me 10 times a day I made it bros...

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Family Feud seen by /tv/ | /r/Greentext

family feud time bois Anonymous 07/30/19(Tue) 20:52:26 No.118860471 >>118860921 >Steve Harvey: "We asked 100 people, what is the male reproductive organ?" >Contestant: "The penis" >SH: "A WUH... HUH??" >audience erupts into laughter >Steve Harvey grabs onto podium to support himself >laughter gets even louder >SH: "O lordy..." >one man goes into cardiac arrest and many others begin vomiting profusely from laughing too hard >SH: "YOU PEOPLE NEED HELP" >the Earth shatters and Satan rises from the underworld to claim unworthy souls >the universe begins rapidly closing in on itself >SH: (putting on a weary voice) "Survey says..." >the board shows 100 for "penis" >Harvey is able to get off one more shocked look before existence as we know it comes to an end
family feud time bois Anonymous 07/30/19(Tue) 20:52:26 No.118860471 >>118860921 >Steve Harvey: "We asked 100 people, what is the male reproductive organ?" >Contestant: "The penis" >SH: "A WUH... HUH??" >audience erupts into laughter >Steve Harvey grabs onto podium to support himself >laughter gets even louder >SH: "O lordy..." >one man goes into cardiac arrest and many others begin vomiting profusely from laughing too hard >SH: "YOU PEOPLE NEED HELP" >the Earth shatters and Satan rises from the underworld to claim unworthy souls >the universe begins rapidly closing in on itself >SH: (putting on a weary voice) "Survey says..." >the board shows 100 for "penis" >Harvey is able to get off one more shocked look before existence as we know it comes to an end

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Anon don't understand | /r/Greentext

Are you ready for the movie? 03/30/22(Wed)09:24:55 No.593799271 LEVEL IN THEATRES AND APRIL 8 189 KB JPG : Anonymous >>593799169 (OP) # how the f--- can you be "ready" for a f------ movie do I have 10 bucks? yes is that what your ass is asking?
Are you ready for the movie? 03/30/22(Wed)09:24:55 No.593799271 LEVEL IN THEATRES AND APRIL 8 189 KB JPG : Anonymous >>593799169 (OP) # how the f--- can you be "ready" for a f------ movie do I have 10 bucks? yes is that what your ass is asking?

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anons gf uplifts him | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/29/22(Sun)17:13:33 No.68827301 >gf praises me for being smart >I flunked out of art school while she has a master's degree >gf tells me I am so tall >I am 5'7", she is 5'6" 1.01 MB PNG >gf tells me I am a natural leader >I am shy and quiet >gf wishes she was athletic like me >I am a shut nerd What is she doing? I don't understand what she wants. : Anonymous >>68827301 (OP) # >my gf is being nice to me >what is her endgame? 05/29/22(Sun)17:41:01 No.68827552
: Anonymous 05/29/22(Sun)17:13:33 No.68827301 >gf praises me for being smart >I flunked out of art school while she has a master's degree >gf tells me I am so tall >I am 5'7", she is 5'6" 1.01 MB PNG >gf tells me I am a natural leader >I am shy and quiet >gf wishes she was athletic like me >I am a shut nerd What is she doing? I don't understand what she wants. : Anonymous >>68827301 (OP) # >my gf is being nice to me >what is her endgame? 05/29/22(Sun)17:41:01 No.68827552

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Anon gets a divorce | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11 hours ago 769969141 Sorry I suck at Greentext. >Catch my now ex-wife cheating on me. >Pretend nothing is wrong but turn into a manipulative sociopath. >Break gas gauge in her car. Siphon gas out randomly so she's always running out. >Get a nanny cam that's hidden in a lamp. Get video of her f------ around. >Find out everything I can about the guy she's f------. >lol dance instructor. >Find out he's looking for work, get ahold of his resume. >Rework it so it's not retarded, impersonate him, and get him an interview at a studio 2 states away. Dream job, if you're a f--. >He bites. Takes the job and after some mushy b------- ghosts my wife. >Meanwhile I start siphoning money out of our accounts slowly and keep the cash hidden away in my truck in a lockbox. Put away $10k. >It's time. >Wait for her to be dead asleep, unlock her phone and turn off alarms on days that the coin I flip turns up heads. >She gets fired. Calls me bawling her eyes out. >When she gets home my wedding ring is on the table with her laptop playing the video of them f------. Next to that is a copy of the divorce petition. 10 REPLIES
Anonymous 11 hours ago 769969141 Sorry I suck at Greentext. >Catch my now ex-wife cheating on me. >Pretend nothing is wrong but turn into a manipulative sociopath. >Break gas gauge in her car. Siphon gas out randomly so she's always running out. >Get a nanny cam that's hidden in a lamp. Get video of her f------ around. >Find out everything I can about the guy she's f------. >lol dance instructor. >Find out he's looking for work, get ahold of his resume. >Rework it so it's not retarded, impersonate him, and get him an interview at a studio 2 states away. Dream job, if you're a f--. >He bites. Takes the job and after some mushy b------- ghosts my wife. >Meanwhile I start siphoning money out of our accounts slowly and keep the cash hidden away in my truck in a lockbox. Put away $10k. >It's time. >Wait for her to be dead asleep, unlock her phone and turn off alarms on days that the coin I flip turns up heads. >She gets fired. Calls me bawling her eyes out. >When she gets home my wedding ring is on the table with her laptop playing the video of them f------. Next to that is a copy of the divorce petition. 10 REPLIES

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